PART THREE Chap 24-70

Part III

The Old Bailey

I had been locked away for more than ten years in that prison when in early fall 1740, I was called before the Old Bailey. I had no clue why I was being brought before the Magistrate. I was hoping either they had decided to hang me or free me. Either way, I could no longer endure the living hell I was in. I had lost a lot of weight, was sickly and looked like a poor waif from the streets. Brought before the Magistrate in shackles and tattered clothing which hung on my thin frame. The chill of the fall air drifted through the room. I shook from the cold as I clutched my coat closed the best I could to stay warm.

"So what brings this poor soul before me today? Hmmmm, I see it says here this boy was found adrift at sea after his ship sank. And the rest of your crew were presumed dead. You are accused of murder and piracy. Is it true what this paper says about you boy?" Asked the Magistrate.

" Yes your Grace, good kind Sir." I said hanging my head, humbling myself before the court. I tried to look as remorseful as possible hoping to sway the Magistrate a bit.

" And how old are you, boy?"

" I don't know. I can't remember My Lord.”

“How long had you been at sea before you were brought here?”

“I can't quite remember, Good kind Sir. Perhaps nine, ten, maybe more.”

“Are you sure, boy? You don't look any older than sixteen or seventeen.”

“As I said to you, your Grace, I can't rightly remember.”

“Were you always on a pirate ship?”

“No Sir! Not at first. The first ship I sailed with was an actual merchant ship, Experiment, under Captain Cornet. A pirate by the name of Captain Roberts took our ship and forced the surviving crew to join his or die. I chose to join. There I worked with the ship's cook due to my size. He saw how hard I worked and made me his cabin boy. Right before he was killed I was traded over to the Captain of the Mary Jane as a cabin boy where I sailed for the next several years."

The Magistrate looked at me for a while and then said,” It is stated in the paper in front of me that you're listed as First Mate Nee...Nii...How do you pronounce this God awful name young man?

“Neen-arh Tazz-b-bár, your Grace.

“What kind of name is that?”

“It's Scandinavian, deep mountain region, your Grace.”

“Nienar Tazbbár of the ship, “The Mary Jane,” which is listed in the maritime records as a merchant ship. Why then had this boy been charged with the crimes of murder and piracy for a merchant ship? It seems to me the lad tried to live a God fearing honest life after being taken by pirates.”

“ We suspect the “Mary Jane” is a pirate ship under the guise as a merchant ship, plus his time sailing with the dreaded Captain Bartholomew Roberts! He should be held accountable for the crimes he committed then. During the time the boy sailed with Black Bart they took at least 300 ships! Why he has been spared the gallows thus far is beyond me.” Spoke up the prosecuting councilor.

I stared at the magistrate trying to read which way he was going with this line of questioning. He looked down at me and studied me a bit. “Perhaps Councilor, but from what I see before me is that this boy must have been sent to sea at a very early age. So young as to where he can not remember his own age. In his shoes, what would you have chosen when faced with the choice of death or piracy so young? Then again, First Mate is a far cry from a mere cabin boy. Are you lying to me boy?” He said with a hint of anger in his voice.

“No Sir, I did start off as the cabin boy, but worked my way up the ranks. I guess my Captain thought my hard work called for the promotion.” I said as innocent as I could.

Looking back down at me, he asked sternly, “Did you rape and murder and steal from others while you worked for Captain Roberts?”

Oh no, no Sir! I would never do such a brutally horrible deed. Captain Roberts also strongly forbade it. Anyone doing such a dastardly deed was killed on spot. As for murder, I would not claim to be a murderer. I only fought to protect myself and the ship in which I was in service to. Due to my age, kind Sir, Captain Roberts forbade me to leave the ship when they would pillage a ship or town. Please be kind, merciful Lord.” I begged.

“And what of the man you maimed the very first day you were sent to Marshalsea?” The Counselor snapped at me.

“That too was in self defense, my Lord. The man tried to rape me. I did what I had to do to protect myself. Kind Lord you surely can understand?” I looked as innocently as I could.

He looked at me for a little while and then said, “Since you are so young and look so pathetic throwing yourself before the court, I will give you one more chance at a life. By judgment of this court this young man known as Nienar Tazbbár will be sent to the new colonies to be an indentured servant for the period of no less than ten, but no longer than fifteen years. You are to be sent to New Orleans, Louisiana where you will learn to be a good Christian and to pay penance for your past cruel and murderous deeds. Now take him away."

I stood staring back at him in total shock. My heart sank. I was being sold off as a slave! From one prison to another. Within a matter of hours I was confined to a hole not more than sixteen feet long, chained with fifty other men to a board, with padlocked collars around our necks. Hardtack and water were given once a day. Most of the time it was either moldy or infested with maggots. After a while I couldn't even choke it down. I decided I'd rather starve. But as much as I didn't want to eat I found I needed to. My body would ache terribly if I didn't.

The Auction Block

During the voyage to the New Colonies we were left in that hole for the entire two month journey. The time in confinement below deck resulted in outbreaks of scurvy and dysentery. We were all in pretty bad shape by the time we arrived. To this day I am unsure what I had but I know I was sick as hell. Eventually we docked in New York first and half of the slaves were taken from the ship. The rest of us ended up in New Orleans, Louisiana. It was late fall at this point. The cold cut right through my tattered clothing making my bones ache. My stomach rumbled as the smell of food wafted through the air. But I was so sick I was pretty sure I wouldn't be able to hold anything down anyway. We were shuffled off the ship into a large building. I was singled out from the group of my fellow convicts and brought to a smaller room and placed with others who looked about fifteen to eighteen years of age. A bad feeling crept into my chest as I desperately looked for a way to escape. My eyes searched the room but there was no way out other than the door. Two men came in and started breaking us up into smaller groups. About twenty of us were pushed into a smaller room, stripped down naked, and quickly scrubbed clean with ice cold water. A rough hand clamped my shoulder and proceeded to scrub at least a layer of skin and dirt off. Then grabbed me by the hair and dunked me under the water. I came back up gasping for air, thrashing about, ready to kill. One of the men then grabbed me tightly by the throat, showing me a straight razor. I stayed as still as possible as he proceeded to shave off my hair. It had dreaded badly and had lice and it needed to be all cut off. But the way it was done was very humiliating. Anger began to overwhelm me. I wanted to run, run as fast as I could. But where? I had no lay of the land. It was a totally new world to me. Who knows, I just wanted out.

They dressed us in linen undergarments and lined us up on an auction block. We were all left in heavy shackles and numbers were drawn on our arms with charcoal. I looked at the others who were in the room with me. Almost all were young girls from Ireland except for me and two other young boys who looked like they came from the Islands. And they were really young. Maybe no older than ten or twelve. A group of men walked in. They looked at us like a bunch of prized cattle. Each one checked our hair, teeth, and squeezed our arms to see how strong we were. I was raging inside standing there exposed to a room full of strange humans. It took every ounce of my energy to not haul off and hit one of these men while being poked and prodded like some animal. The bidding started off slowly with the girls going first. Sold as house maids. During this time, a Capuchin monk entered and proceeded to watch the auction. He seemed to be studying me. The two younger boys were bought by a very thin, creepy, man with pale eyes, pale skin, and white long hair. I knew what he truly was. I saw through his glamor. I could smell it on him. The fresh blood. He was a vampire and a day-walker. It was rare for one so old to be a day-walker, but then again, it may have just been the glamor he chose to show the outside world. He reminded me of Rhavan. My heart secretly broke for those boys. Sadly I knew what they were in for now being the property of a creature like that.

All were sold, leaving me the only one left up on the block. There had to be at least twenty bidders in the room. I swallowed back my fear and anger. I stared straight ahead, chin held high, not to show these people any weakness. The bidding went crazy, shouting out large sums of money. The monk began to argue with the auctioneer. He was waving a parchment and pointing at me. The creepy man kept looking at me the same way Rhavan would before he, well, anyway, it made me feel even more like a trapped wounded animal. He pointed at me and then said something in French I think. Two men came at me. I was ready to fight because I was not about to become some sexual deviants toy again. I got in a couple of good blows before they were able to pin me down. Shackles used correctly can be a great defensive weapon. Only, I didn't have much strength so I tired out quickly giving up the fight for the time being. I was forced to stand in front of the creepy man as he examined me. His hands felt every part of my body. Boney fingers traced the many scars on my chest and back.

“Enjoying yourself?” I asked sarcastically.

He came in close and took a long inhale close to my neck, smiled and then grabbed my crotch, fondling me. “Mmmmmm, you smell sweet, like fae. I would love to taste you.” My face flushed red as I felt thoroughly humiliated. I kicked the man away. He landed hard on his ass. His servants ran to help him up as the two little boys giggled. He got up and hit me hard in the chest with a thin piece of cane. Starvation, illness, and stress caused my mind to play tricks on me and a flashback of Rhavan jumped into my mind. I just completely lost it.

"Xta'rl ussa 'sohna lueth Usstan orn dosst rinteith doeb!” *Touch me again and I will tear your throat out!* I growled at him in Svartálfar. I hadn't spoken my native language in decades. It took me back a bit that I even remembered it. They wrestled me back from him and placed my shackled wrists onto a hook above my head. I was hoisted up until my feet left the floor. The auctioneer came towards me with a piece of paper.“So, it looks like prison did very little to break you pirate scum. Seeing how you got so much fight still left in ye. No one attacks my men. Now, you are gonna be made an example of!” He said angrily and proceeded to whip me until I passed out.

I was left there to hang. As I drifted in and out of consciousness, the monk and the creepy old man continued to argue with the auctioneer over the next two hours. The monk kept waving a piece of paper in front of them as the old man tried to give him money. Tired of the bickering, the auctioneer released me from the shackles. Clothes were thrown at me and I was told to dress quickly for my new owner was waiting. The fresh open wounds screamed as the fabric touched the bleeding, raw, skin. A metal collar was placed around my neck and shackles placed on my wrists and ankles. All were attached by a long chain. I was then escorted out of the building into the cold. Snow was coming down pretty heavy as I was brought over to the monk. I let out a huge sigh. I think I heard him chuckle under his breath.

“Release the boy from these oppressive bonds please.” He politely asked the men.

I was released and handed over to the Friar. “Are ya sure that be wise conciderin' on how he behaved in there?”

“I believe he will be of no trouble. And if so, I can handle him.” He said matter-of-factly. Turning to me he said, “Parlez-vous le français ?” I just looked at him puzzled. “Do you speak French?” I shook my head 'no'.

“So, you are a former pirate. How did you end up in prison?

“The ship I was sailing with sank off the coast of the Caribbean. I was picked up out of the ocean by a Royal Navy ship. I was brought to England and sent to prison.”

“ Nienar Tazbbár. Strange name. Where are you from?”

“Scandinavia. Deep Mountain region.” I answered through chattering teeth..

“Hmmmmm, Scandinavia is a long way from the Caribbean.” He said almost kiddingly, like he didn't believe me. “We have chosen a new name for you. One much easier to pronounce. Your new Christian name is Nicholas Taylor. Brother Nicholas, is what you will be known as from now on.”

“What? I responded, shocked.

“You can no longer use the name given to you at birth. The name is too exotic and people will question it. To me it is clear, you are not human. This will also help keep that identity a secret. Here you have a fresh start and a chance at a good Christian life.” He said in the same matter of fact tone. I cringed at the new name I was given. I didn't like the sound of it one bit. Brother? Ugh. And how did he know I was not human? There was definitely more to me being sent here than to pay for my crimes as a pirate.

“Now that I have an idea of who you are, I will introduce myself to you. My Name is Brother Leonardo O'Mannan. You can call me Brother Leo. My humblest apologies for what happened to you back there. You were never supposed to have been on the auction block since your passage here had been paid by the church. Once you are well enough you will be taught our way of life.”

“How did you know I was not Human?” I asked, stunned.

“You will soon learn, we know many things. More than just religion.”

We walked in silence up Canal Street, then across Charters Street, up St. Peters Street to the monastery within the Ursuline next to St Louis Cathedral. Once we arrived, I was handed over to another monk who brought me to a room with a big wooden tub. He pointed at me to get in. I wasn't about to argue. The water was just as ice cold as back at the auction house. I cursed out loud as I got in. Something hard hit me in the back of the head. I turned around and the monk looked back at me angrily shaking a stick at me. Placing his finger to his lips signaling me to be silent. Pissed, I turned back around and tried to clean up as quickly as I could. The pain from my open wounds numbed. My teeth began to chatter loudly as the cold water reached my bones. I felt very tired all of a sudden. I think the monk noticed and pulled me out. I dried off and he put ointment on my wounds and bandaged them. A brown tunic made from wool was thrown over my head and a rope with three knots on it, wrapped around my waist. The tunic was very scratchy on my skin and way too big on me and dragged on the floor under my feet. I felt so small. The monk then motioned for me to follow him and lead me up a narrow flight of stairs and down a hallway to a small room with a single bed, chair, writing table and a small window near the bed. He pointed for me to enter and locked the door behind me. As soon as I heard the click of the lock I let out a frustrated yell at the top of my lungs. I was so angry I punched the door as hard as I could, splitting open several of my knuckles. I paced the floor trying to figure a way out. A slot in the bottom of the door opened and a hand with a bowl reached through. Followed by a glass of what looked like wine. I was so hungry I grabbed it and ate it as quickly as I could. I don't think I even tasted the gruel. Thirstily I drank down the liquid. It was warm and very salty. Unfortunately, soon after I found myself violently ill. Pretty much losing all I just ate onto a chamber pot that was in the corner of the room. My skin burned like it was on fire. I pulled off the scratchy robe to try and cool down. The fresh wounds from the whipping I received earlier began to bleed again. Feeling weak, I laid down on the bed and fell asleep instantly.

The next thing I can recall was waking a few times to Brother Leo draining blood from me or trying to get me to eat and drink. I have no clue how long I was out for. Days, months, years? Time meant nothing. It was surmised I had contracted something on the ship, but they were not sure exactly what it was. What they did know was that it was not scurvy or dysentery. I had hovered on the verge of death for weeks on end. The nightmares I was plagued with were terrifying. I felt at times that I was being fed from against my will. I would lash out violently, trying to fight off my attackers. Rhavan's face would flash into my mind.

Learning The Way

Brother Leo stayed by my side over the next two months. By April 1741 I was well enough to walk the courtyard of the monastery. For the first few days we walked in silence. Then during one of our walks he finally spoke to me. He explained the ways of the Order that I would be expected to not just follow, but live by. All Capuchins took a vow of silence and only spoke when allowed or during prayer. They were to live as closely to the ideals of Saint Francis as much as possible. The life of a monk was to be one of extreme poverty and simplicity. None were allowed personal possessions. All was given over to the church and monastery. Everything was to be obtained by begging, and were not allowed to ever accept or touch money. Furniture and clothing were kept simple. They were required to go bare-footed, even in winter. The monks wore a brown wool robe with a large, pointed hood reaching to the waist attached to it and the traditional woolen cord with three knots tied around the waist. All of their hair was cut in the fashion of the Chudakarana. Since I was not baptized a Catholic nor had I pledged myself to the Order of Capuchins, I did not have to have my hair cut in that style and so very thankful for it. Around midnight, every night, we observed the Liturgy of Hours, an official set of daily prayers. There were two hours of private prayer required daily. Even with all the religious praying and talk of living in poverty, I discovered quickly that this particular monastery was far from what they preached. The monks who lived here in the monastery were very comfortable. All had beautifully decorated rooms and all ate very well. But to the outside world, they looked and lived poorer than poor.

Floggings or “discipline” as it was called, were frequently given to the younger monks by the head of the Order. His name was Elder Bishop O'Mannan, and I will go into more detail about him later. Anyway, it was meant to keep them from the temptations of the flesh. And living in the French Quarter there was plenty of it. Carnal relations between the Brothers were strictly looked down upon. Those who were caught breaking this rule were horribly punished, from floggings to being turned into eunuchs. But even with the threat of those punishments, this deterred that behavior very little. If anything it only fueled it. Young monks were sent there for “mission work” but brought really for the older monks to have relations with. I thankfully was left alone for the most part aside from an occasional drunken monk flirting and groping. And then there was Elder Bishop. Again, more on him in time.

Given I was not going anywhere it seemed for some time, I was able to make the small room I was given my own. First thing I did was acquire a much better bed. One made of fresh hay and strong cotton material. I built bookshelves which were filled with little trinkets that I found interesting and lots of books. I was able to beg for enough coins to have light linen clothing made for me to wear under the scratchy robes I was forced to wear.

The Order of Cain, Vampires of the Cloth

There was a much darker side to New Orleans and this particular monastery that was kept very much hidden from the world. It was a safe haven for vampires. With the masses escaping The Great Bubonic Plague of 1738, affecting the areas of Eastern and Northern Europe along with Southeastern Transylvania, which were hardest hit, causing these creatures to flood into port. Witch trials were also running rampant through all of Europe bringing those to our shores as well. The vampire to human ratio was something around six to one. That's why New Orleans became such a huge slave port. Had to feed these bloodsuckers somehow. What easier way than to just ship the food in under the guise as “slaves” and “indentured servants”. Who would question if a few disappeared. More than not they were just reported as runaways. I should also mention that to this modern day as I write this memoir, New Orleans is the missing persons capital of all the United States.

With this mass exodus also brought the old covens. These were created and run by the oldest of all vampires. The largest and oldest in the world was the Coven of Cain. I remember Kryimsson mentioning it to me since it was his Mother who founded and led the coven. But he never went into the history or detail. They were directly responsible for building the monastery and kept very close ties with the Archdioceses of New Orleans who in return helped keep their evil secrets. The monk's were also the keepers of the ones who went against rules and could not be destroyed. Some of these were the children of the first royal vampire clans, the first covens. Some had broken taboo rules. Some were insane. Together, they orchestrated an uprising against the old covens. After their failed coupe they were put on trial. Most were killed, those surviving were kept in a deep slumber, locked away in the attic of the monastery in modest pine coffins. Thirteen coffins in total. They were kept in their slumber by feeding them often so they would not crave blood and awaken. I'm sure herbs and other things were added to the blood to ensure they slept deep and soundly. Blood for this was donated, willingly. A small cut was made on the wrist by hand allowing the liquid to flow into a bowl. Any feeding directly from the flesh was absolutely forbidden. To prohibit any feeding contact between the monks and other temptations blood had to be drawn in this way. At first I had a huge issue with this practice. I was not happy about being food for a bunch of vampires. But as with everything else I had been through to that point in my life, I learned to get used to it. And it was a much better arrangement for me because I wanted nothing to do with any of them.

There was no outwardly seen hierarchy at the monastery, but within, there were those who had much more leadership and control than others. First in command was Elder Bishop O'Mannan. An old vampire of slim build, about 5’9. He had fire red hair and beady little blue eyes that looked right through you. He was founder of the “Order of Cain '', consisting of those religious monks of the blood who followed the laws of the old ways and dedicated themselves to the monastery. Elder Bishop was also the one who had last say and ultimate control over all of us. He was the twin brother of the Countess Catherine O'Mannan, leader and founder of the Coven of Cain. He reported directly to her of all goings on at the monastery. Second in command of us was Elder Brother Leonardo O'Mannan. He was the eldest surviving son of the Countess. He looked the age of thirty although he was much, much older than that. He was of fit build, 5’12” with reddish brown hair and greenish hazel eyes. He was to keep the other monks in order, ensuring blood donations were given. He liked to work in Alchemy. Working on experiments with herbs and blood and other components. All of them have walked the earth before the days of Christ.

There was only one member of this Order of vampire monks I became close to and that was a young monk named Sebastian Littlefoot. He was not a vampire, but dedicated his life to the Capuchians. He was born to the Bayougoula tribe. He was orphaned as a child when a rogue coven of vampires murdered his parents. At the age of three, Brother Leo found him wandering the swamp and brought him back to the monastery to raise him. To the others, he seemed touched in the head. They said the cause of his delusions and visions were from the trauma of seeing his family murdered. The reality was that he was a shape-shifter. He also exhibited the habits and personality of a halfling. Being he was still very young, about four years of age when we first met in 1740, he did not know his full potential. But he could commune with the undead and other otherworldly creatures and could hear the thoughts of other vampires. He had sandy brown-blonde hair that curled at its ends and tanned skin. His eyes were the color of wheat, a light golden brown. Not the typical hair and eye color of a Native American, but then again, Sebastian wasn't typical. We struck up a deep, strong friendship right away. I took him under my wing and took care of him like a younger sibling. He helped me cope with learning to live a life outside of prison and piracy and adapt to the life of a monk. He helped relearn Latin, and taught me all about the history of the new land I was living in. I in turn would tell him stories of my time sailing the high seas, and some of my adventures with House Acnar. He was one of the few I ever outright told my true identity. That I was a Svartálfar.

During my illness it was discovered by Brother Leo that Rhavan failed to turn me fully into a vampire. Because I am presumably a born immortal, I can't die. In order to become a vampire, one must pass through a moment of death. So I hovered somewhere between life and death, but yet, not a ghoul. He believed I was a new species of vampire. Believe me when I tell you this news made me even more angry and confused than I was before about what I was. I needed to drink blood in order to survive, but my body rejected certain types. I was able to feed from animals. I could also feed from types of non-humans. Human blood always seemed to make me violently ill, so Brother Leo concluded that I could ingest it from other fae creatures due to the magical essence within their blood. Now in the 1740's finding fae blood was pretty much impossible. And since none had picked up on Sebastian’s true self, I was fed elixirs of herbs and animal blood in order to keep me from fiending for blood. This left me feeling like I was never at full health. I always felt sluggish, the same as when I was in prison. And I really didn't eat much because the food didn't interest me that often. Us younger monks were fed mostly gruel and stale bread. While the Elders of the Order ate like kings. On very rare occasions Brother Sebastian would grab a peach or apple from a street vendor without then suspecting him and share it with me. They always tasted amazing.

The Runaway Monk

Needless to say, I did not adapt easily to the rules. Not being able to enjoy the pleasures of a woman or to feel the ocean wind, to be free at sea was a hard pill to swallow. The want to taste nothing but rum on my lips, not communion wine. I wanted to speak when I wanted too. Go where I wanted without an escort or shackles like a criminal. I wanted to explore the new land I was living in. This yearning grew in me with every passing day. I refused to memorize the prayers and hymns. I believed in none of it. Even when I had to learn the bible when I was with Rhavan, I was a child of Odin. And when I did try to ask questions I was told to be silent. When I would not, I was put in a small, windowless room, shackled and gagged. The daily floggings did nothing but numb me. During my first year there I tried several times to run away but got caught every time. The punishment was usually to have me flogged and made to kneel on stones and pray. In which I would pray to Odin. But after the third time Elder Bishop had had enough. I was locked in a small room in the attic of the monastery. Placed in heavy shackles, and a metal gag placed in my mouth so I was forced to observe silence. I was beaten bloody and left to fast in solitude and starve. Memories of being locked away in the dungeons of Rhavan's castle and my time in prison raged like a storm in my head. I begged silently to any God who would listen to release me from this living hell. When I was let out several days later, I was brought back to my room and given a small glass of fresh warm animal blood mixed with herbs and bread. Shortly after, Elder Bishop came in. I stood and bowed, standing silent until spoken to.

“Why do you seem to have such a hard time following the rules, child? I have read in Rhavan's journals about what a handful you were. I had hoped prison would have broken your spirit a bit more than it has. But you have been here with us over a year now and I can no longer allow your unruly behavior. It is affecting young Brother Sebastian. He looks highly upon you and we will not have you corrupt him.” He said looking down on me with angered pity.

I stood staring back at him in shock and a small pang of fear struck my chest. He went on to reveal to me that he had possession of all Rhavan's personal journals. A stronger, more strangling like feeling gripped my chest. Apparently one of Rhavan's fledglings escaped the fire we set at his castle, but he didn't survive long enough to give any details as to what happened. I was very grateful at that moment. The Elder Bishop continued, “They describe how Rhavan searched for a mythical creature called a Svartálfar. That he believed you were the prophesied child Lilith and Samael sent forth into our world. He believed you had the power within you to bring the Coven of Cain back to the glory it once was. We would laugh at him for chasing a fairytale.”

He went on to tell me the detailed account of how Rhavan found me and all the other sorted and sordid little tidbits about our difficult relationship. It had meticulous records of all the tortures and experiments he performed on myself and his many other unlucky fledglings. How my blood turned him and others younger, stronger. Rhavan referred to it as the “Elixir of Life'' for all vampires. It could turn the oldest of them to a young sprite man once again. It could bring a dying vampire back to full strength, young and viral. The Elder Bishop told me how when I had first arrived, all of the older monks in the monastery were very frail. After all the centuries of living human blood only offered so much. Once all had drank of my blood they were all as they were when they all were first embraced. As I continued to listen my heart froze. I had to force myself to breathe. I knew then and there I was in the lion's den and no one could be trusted.

“But I have faith that we can help you bend to the will of our Lord and the Coven of Cain. Now that I have told you what I know about you, tell me truthfully, where is Rhavan? Last entry in his very detailed journals was about a grand ball he was hosting for the Coven of Cain to show you off. He was so very proud of the fledgling you became.”

My mind raced for an answer.

“Nothing to say now Brother Nicholas?” his voice had a hint of anger.

“I am not sure. I've lost count of the years since I've last had any contact with him.” I stammered.

“Why did you not keep in contact with your beloved Sire?”

“All went silent before I went to prison. I do not know why.”

“Why did you leave you dear Sire's side?”

“I needed to explore the world. He did not object.” It was the best I could think of at the moment. “May I speak freely Elder Bishop?”

“You may, Brother Nicholas.”

“Why did you bring me here? It seems I am slowly discovering I was not sent here to repent for my sins.” I said with anger growing within me. A small smile formed as it seemed I was much more observant than he took me for. “Repent, no. There is no redeeming you demon child. You are here to serve a much higher purpose.”

“And what exactly is that purpose, Elder Bishop?” I hissed.

“After reading the journals, it took Brother Leo and I a few years to finally track down what happened to you after your ship sank. Sorry about that by the way. Our Coven has a very long political reach and are the one responsible for the Royal Navy’s attack on your ship. Along with driving your Captain mad causing him to scuttle the ship off the coast of the Caribbean. We wouldn't want anything horrible to happen to our beloved Rhavan's most prized possession. And you are Brother Nicholas. You are a very much prized possession to have. Your blood can help us heal quicker. It reverses aging and your strong warrior heart will help us rise to be the most powerful Coven in the world once again. Not to mention the magical power you hold within you as well. With it you will take down the smaller covens for us. Rhavan has written of your escapades for raiding small towns for him. How you could slice through the villagers like shafts of wheat. Our numbers grow by the week. The Old Ones are flooding into the New Colonies to flee the witch hunts and plagues sweeping through Europe. And with the abundance of slaves and other unwanted riff-raff that will be sent here from France, we have plenty of food stepping off those ships every day. There will be rouge groups of vampires fighting for control of New Orleans and we can not allow that to happen. You will fight for us when the time comes when we take this city as our own. This is why I can not allow you to continue to try to flee here. You are much too valuable.”

I stood, frozen. I couldn't believe what I had just heard. Hot tears of anger fell slowly down my cheeks. All of my dear brothers and shipmates, dead, because these creatures wanted me. All hope was gone. Kryimsson had gone silent. Apocalypse was gone. Kronyk, and our Captain, all gone because of me. Once again I was a piece of property to be used as food and what other sick things they may think up to use me for. It felt like something tore out my soul. Prison broke my spirit, but hearing this literally shattered my soul. Elder Bishop, seeing my reaction, turned and opened the door allowing two other monks into my room. One carried a block of wood and a heavy hammer. Elder Bishop grabbed me and sunk his teeth deep into my throat, draining me before I could react. He pinned me to the bed, sitting on my chest, securing I couldn't move. Someone grabbed my ankles and tied them tightly to the block of wood. They were about to hobble me!

“What are you doing! Get off me!” As I struggled with him, his face began to turn younger. He went from looking like something that crawled out of a crypt to about the age of a fifty year old human.

“I am ensuring that you understand we will not put up with you trying to run away and breaking the rules here any longer. I know the punishments that you were subjected to by your Sire. Here, we do things a bit more straightforward and subtle. Perhaps I should have done this in the first place. It would have saved me great frustration. But Brother Leo begged me to have patience with you. My patience dear boy has faded.” And with that being said, he lowered his head only slightly and a pain from my left ankle seared through me. I screamed out. He placed a thick piece of leather in my mouth to stop me from crying out loud again. Next pain from my right ankle shot through. The Elder Bishop said as he watched with gleeful eyes, “Servants, be subject to your masters with all respect, not only to the good and gentle but also to the unjust. For this is a gracious thing, when, mindful of God, one endures sorrows while suffering unjustly. For what credit is it if, when you sin and are beaten for it, you endure? But if when you do good and suffer for it you endure, this is a gracious thing in the sight of God. For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps'”. I writhed on my bed in excruciating pain as they set and bound my broken ankles in splints. Their plan was not to cripple me, just teach me a lesson. And believe me, it worked! I never tried to run away again.

Monk Qui Mange Péché

Eventually I submitted to this horrid way of life. Dragging through each day in utter misery. I would repeat the lessons and prayers I was taught but never bothered to learn from them. I was kept in ankle shackles that restricted my walking. So even if I wanted to escape, I wouldn't get far wearing them. They also placed a collar on me that thwarted my inherent magickal abilities. Trying to escape was not even an option after that. I had tried several times to bleed myself dry to end my misery, but always healed quickly due to the herbs Brother Leo would feed me. The Elder Bishop had now developed a craving for my blood and would take sexual liberties with me and feed from me often in the early morning hours. I never bothered to fight him. What would be the point? More punishments? More new tortures thought up by the Church? I wanted no part of it. So I let him do as he wished with me.

Back in the spring of 1743, Brother Sebastian sensed something was desperately wrong with me. For one who was all of a five years old had the wisdom and soul of an old man. He had a suspicion of what Elder Bishop was doing to me. Feeding straight from the vein was strictly forbidden. Having sexual relations was even more taboo. Seeing how much I suffered in silence, he decided to give me a gift. It was a small orchid. Where he had gotten it from I have no idea. He said creatures like us needed beauty in our lives, something for us to nurture to give us the feeling of being one with nature. At first I was skeptical about caring for this little plant, but within a few days the orchid responded and started to grow and bloom into beautiful purplish-white flowers. This led to me being allowed to create little gardens throughout the courtyard. Finding and replanting flowers to beautify the monastery where we lived a little. I settled into a nice routine working in the gardens I created. It kept me calm. I felt at peace for the first time in many years. This also made Elder Bishop and Brother Leo very pleased to see that I had accepted my situation. As a reward, I was allowed to read the old scrolls and books in Brother Leo's personal library. During this time I stumbled onto the Books of Enoch. His writings on the Nephilim and Fallen Angels intrigued me. It seemed the angels were other worldly like me. I could identify with the creatures from the Nephilim. I also discovered an old pagan like practice that was still done in Europe among the Welsh, Irish and Scottish and other heavily populated Christian areas throughout Eastern Europe. Where paganism and Christianity mixed, called Sin-Eating. A Sin-Eater would take on the unforgiven sins of the dying by means of food and drink, thus absolving the soul and allowing that person to rest in peace. But it was more than just taking in one's sins. I learned how to commune with nature. Much farther than nurturing garden plants. I could read the clouds. I could hear trees moan and talk to each other. The wind talked to me in loving whispers. There were times over the years where a poor soul would come to the Ursuline Nuns asking about a Sin Eater, but none existed in New Orleans. I had perfected my own style of Sin-Eating. I fed from the dying energy like a vampire feeds from blood. I would feel stronger, everything was more sharp. Colors, sounds, fragrances. I would sit in my little garden for hours and just listen with my eyes closed. My magic was still thwarted, but the rest of me was healthy, even my mind felt healthy once I found Sin-Eating.

My first time Sin-Eating happened on a quiet, warm, summer night. A very beautiful woman came to the monastery begging for absolution for her very rich philandering dying husband. She wanted him to have a Christian burial but was too much a sinner and was not a Catholic as she was. Brother Leo told me to go with her and do what I had learned. Nervously, I agreed and followed her home. She brought me to her dying husband. I walked over and sat next to him, taking his hand in mine and asked if he had anything he wished to confess before leaving this mortal world. He looked at me terrified, and whispered,“Demon!”

Looking at him confused, I asked, “Are you speaking of me kind Sir? I am just a humble Capuchin monk come to help you cross to the other side resolved of sin.”

“I can see you demon. Your teeth, your eyes!”

I was a bit taken back that he could see my true self. “Please Sir, I am not here to harm you. Are we not all demons of some sort in this world? You are a demon of lust and greed, are you not? Some demons are fallen angels, as spoken in the Book of Enoch, who still wish to serve our Lord, God. Just as the Archangel Samael. Look upon me as an angel of death. Please allow me to take your sin from you. Die peacefully Sir. Give your wife in your dying this last bit of love and compassion which you could not give her in your life.” His demeanor changed as death approached him. He grabbed my arm and nodded he was ready. Together we recited the Lord's prayer and then I took out a piece of bread and salt from my pouch and placed it on his chest. As I made the sign of the cross above him I said, “Agnus Dei, qui universa O pater, noli timere, Lucifer, aut damnatio. Et a peccatis tuis in me dubitabilis, ut Regnum Dei requiescant in pace in omnibus et in gloria. In Nomine Patri. Et Filii. Spiritus Sancti.” (''Dear lamb of the All Father, Fear not Lucifer or Damnation. I take your unresolved sins into me, so you may rest in peace in the Kingdom of God and in all his glory. In Nomine Patri. Et Filii. Spiritus Sancti'.”) Drawing the sign of the cross on his forehead as he drifted towards death. I removed the bread and salt and ate it, washing it down with a bit of red wine from my flask. I took him up in my arms and fed from him. I do not know what made me do it. I was not thirsting for blood. It was as if something deep inside me needed it. Drinking, I took his death into me. I could feel his heart stop. A surge of energy I had never felt before hit me in the chest hard causing my heart to skip a beat. The man quietly faded off to his death at peace. A slight smile upon his face. I basked in the feeling I had coursing through my body for only a few moments. I gathered my senses before I allowed his wife back in the room. His wife cried and hugged me, thanking me over and over. She handed me a small pouch with coins and hugged me again. As I walked back to the monastery I felt I finally had found peace with my circumstances. The Sin-Eating felt right. Suddenly I stopped in my tracks. It was the first time I drank human blood and didn't throw it all back up. It was then I realized I could only drink it if they were on the verge of dying. Now I was able to nourish myself without relying on Brother Leo and his concoctions. Funny enough, no one seemed to notice the difference, well no one else except Brother Sebastian. As I performed more of these ceremonies I would feed from the dying, taking their deaths into me. I felt such power within me but could do nothing with it since my magic had been bound. Most times I would just focus it on the little plants in the garden, unleashing it into the soil. My little plants bloomed the most beautiful flowers with the most vibrant colors.

I continued on in this content existence for almost eight years. I was allowed to continue on this path of Sin-Eating by the Elder Bishop because I had never taken vows to become a Capuchin monk, nor was never ordained in any faith. He saw I was content and was not causing issues for him. He still was able to feed from me among other things freely without struggle. By the fall of 1749 word had spread quietly through New Orleans about the “Monk qui mange péché” (The Monk who eats sin.) Most of what I made was taken by the Elder Bishop. I did keep a small amount for myself. After all, I was still a bit of a pirate at heart and wanted some small comforts. One needs to feed some cravings every once in a while. There would be a time, soon, that I would be free of this place and having the coin saved will help me get out of New Orleans. Perhaps even buy my freedom and go far away from these vampires of the cloth.

The Coven of Cain

It was the Summer of 1752 and talk of a war coming between the renegade vampire covens and the Coven of Cain buzzed through the city. I didn't think too much about it at the time since I didn't much care for their war in the first place. And it had not come to our door, so again, not too concerned. That was until Brother Sebastian started hearing voices. This was much different than him simply communing with lost spirits. He said the children of Lilith were beginning to awaken. They were those who had led the rebellion against the Elders of the Coven of Cain. The ones locked away in the attic we fed our blood to. I was the only one he trusted enough to confide in that he could hear some of them whispering. A powerful vampire, Demitri Faust, called to him. Something or someone was making them stir. I confided in him that I could hear them too. The whispers. But I couldn't understand what they were saying, because I didn't understand the language they spoke. Brother Sebastian became very distressed over the thought of them waking. We made a pact that we would not speak a word of this to anyone. I never really bothered to ask about why the war between the two Covens happened, but this seemed the time to start learning. While walking the gardens together after our evening supper I decided to ask Brother Sebastian about this war. Pulling a small bottle of spirits from the pocket I had sewn into my robes, I motioned him to sit next to me under a magnolia tree. “Come sit Brother, enjoy this bottle with me.” I said as I opened it. He sat next to me with wide eyes and a huge smile. Grabbing the bottle from my hand he asked, “How did you happen to acquire this?” and took a huge swig.

“It was a gift from a family that I helped comfort. I learned very early on here about having small vices kept secret.” I winked.

“Speaking of secrets, I have a very personal question I would like to ask you. You don't have to answer if you don't wish to. But I figure we are close enough for me to ask and that you answer honestly. Are you and the Elder Bishop having carnal relations? I know he has been coming to your room several times a week for many years.” he asked bluntly.

I choked a bit on what I was drinking and cleared my throat. Taken a bit back by the straight forwardness of his question, I took a few more large swigs from the bottle, and surprisingly found myself willing to talk to him about the secret I suffered with for so long. “It started about eight years ago after the last time I ran away. He fed from me, flesh to flesh and developed a taste for it. Then progressed to him caressing and kissing my nethers. There have been times where we had intercourse. I've never fought back. What would be the purpose in it? I was tired of the pain and punishments. I used to fight my Sire Rhavan violently and it never got me anywhere than more beatings or torture. I just accepted the Elder Bishops liberties. What was I supposed to do? Who would listen to me? He is the Elder of the Order of Cain. I was brought here to be food for them. They want me to fight in this petty war for territory. Personally, they can all burn for all I care.” The alcohol was definitely loosening my tongue quite a bit. At that moment, it was a relief to talk about what I was going through and felt safe in confiding in Brother Sebastian about it. I knew he would not use it against me.

“I'm so very sorry he has been so cruel to you for all these years. But believe me when I tell you, you are not alone. There are nights when I too have been caught in Elder Bishops grasp. But you are incorrect in thinking there is nothing we can do, say or any one who would care.” He took another big swig. “We can wake them! We can join them and wipe this place out.”

I stared at him shocked. He had never once shown discontent towards the monks or the Church. And here he was suggesting we start a war within the Order of Cain. “You're mad.” I whispered looking around making sure no one had heard him.

“No, no I'm not. We can do this. If we destroy those who run this Coven of Cain at their heart, which is this place, those we wake will rise up and control New Orleans. We can save all those innocent souls that these fiends feed upon, including us.” The look on his face was clear. He was dead serious.

“Brother! I'm shocked that you speak this way about them in that way. Never have you shown any discontent about being here. Brother Leo saved you and brought you here and cared for you like a son.”

“I am truly thankful for Brother Leo and the Capuchins for taking me in and raising me. But as I grew up I saw the only difference between them and those who came and slaughtered my entire family is that they hide behind religion. You showed me that. The hypocrisy in their words. I have watched in silence as you have been forced into a life that was never meant for you or your kind. Maeve and Demitri had it right. These fiends need to be stopped.”

“What really happened to start this war between the Covens anyway?”

“The Coven of Cain believes that the populous, despite it being human or not, are only cattle to them. Nothing but a constant food source. They believe they will take over the world and turn all those against them into slaves. Maeve O'Mannan and Demitri Faust could no longer follow that vision. They believed there could be another way to live amongst humans and still be able to sustain their lifestyle. For all to live in harmony. Not so much as to expose vampires to the human world, but in a way that they could blend in, without fear or be hunted like animals. This began Coven Lilith, named after Maeve's great, great, great-Grandmother, Lilith, Adam's first wife herself. They were not strong in numbers or loyalties and were quickly taken down. Some escaped, like Maeve's twin brother, never to be heard from again. After a short, one-sided trial, ones from lesser families were killed. Those who came from very prominent families ended up here. We could free them and take our revenge and take down the Coven of Cain. Destroy the Order. The Children of Lilith could then control New Orleans and protect the citizens trying to make a life here.”

“I don't know Brother Sebastian. I don't think we can do this. What if we fail? Then what? Will we be put to slumber forever as well? I have finally accepted this life I’ve been forced into. I have only a matter of a few years left here as their indentured servant, as the English court ruled. My sentence was to be ten to fifteen years. I have been here for almost thirteen. They can not by law keep me any longer than that. I'm broken in spirit my friend. The warrior in me is long dead. I don't think I can help you. Although it would be a good cause to fight for.” I could see by the look on his face he wasn't pleased with my answer. We finished off the bottle in silence, and attended the Liturgy of Hours at midnight. Afterward, I returned to my room and settled in for the night. I still had a pretty good buzz still going and was relaxed enough to fall asleep quickly. It was the best night sleep I had had in a very long time.

The Voices in His Head

Over the next several months I thought more and more about what brother Sebastian had told me about Demitri, Maeve and of the war they fought. Even if it was a brief war it was a noble one. I would place fresh flowers on and around her casket. At times I could swear I could almost hear her call to me. I began to have dreams of a woman coming to me, pleading with me to help her. Then, one very stormy night in the fall of 1752 I had a very strange dream. Brother Sebastian had come to my room shortly after our evening prayers with a bottle of wine. We were sitting drinking and talking when I began to feel very strange. My body suddenly became stiff and I fell to the floor hard. I tried to move but couldn't. I looked at Brother Sebastian horrified. What was in the wine? What was happening to me?

“Relax Brother Nicholas. I mean you no harm, but they need your blood. Please forgive me for what is about to happen. It was the only way.” He lifted me off the floor and placed me down on my bed. All I could do is curse him under my breath. “I understand your fear and anger at me. And I accept it, but this needs to be done. My blood is not strong enough. I am only a youngling. You possess the most powerful blood I have ever known. It's been your blood stirring them awake. Please try and understand.” He pleaded with me as he left the room for only a few moments when he came back, hurrying in with two figures under cloaks.

“Did you give him the drink, Sebastian?” a male voice came from one of the cloaked figures.

“That I did, Demitri.”

I stared down the cloaked figure as he approached. Terror gripped my heart. I had no clue what was about to happen to me. My eyes begged Brother Sebastian to stop this from happening. As the male grabbed me up into his arms he whispered, “I mean you no harm child. Please don't fear us.” And proceeded to sink his fangs and fed. The other cloaked figure joined him, latching on to the other side of my throat. A shot of euphoric energy soared throughout my being. I had never felt anything like before in my life. The two fed until I fell into an ecstasy filled unconscious.

Later, in the early hours of that same morning the Elder Bishop came looking for a snack, when he found me unconscious and drenched in sweat. As he came in to drink from my neck, his usual feeding spot, he noticed several puncture marks. Infuriated, he slapped me hard, jarring me awake from my deep slumber. “Who fed from you? I demand to know who did this to you!” He yelled, shaking me.

“I don't know what you are talking about. I went to sleep right after midnight prayer. No one has been in here.” I stammered.

“There are fresh bite marks on your neck! Was it one of the Brothers? More than one?”

“Please Elder Bishop, I really don't know what happened. I was asleep. I have no reason to lie to you. Have I not been good?”

Frustrated, knowing he could not argue that fact, stormed out of my room. I let out a huge sigh of relief. It was only a dream, wasn't it? I felt my neck but found no marks. Still unsure of what had transpired that night I put it to the back of my mind and I rolled over and drifted back to sleep.

Over the next couple of days I walked around in a fog. Something was happening to me but I didn't understand what. I slept soundly at night and wasn't plagued by the usual nightmares I had. And yet I woke exhausted and achy. I confronted Brother Sebastian about what had happened and he convinced me they were just dreams. But deep down I knew it happened. It felt too real. It wasn't until the night she came to me that I knew what had transpired in previous nights was very real.

Once again, it seemed as though it was all a dream. The evening was as uneventful as every other had before it. Said my prayers, sang the hymns, administered self discipline and fell into a deep sleep. I found myself walking down a long tunnel, fog thick and obscuring my view. As I exited I realized I was in the attic of the monastery. A soft hand reached out of the darkness and caressed my cheek. Startled, I stepped back. There standing before me was one of the cloaked figures that had come to me a few nights before. Slowly it removed it's hood and a beautiful voluptuous woman with fiery red hair, piercing blue eyes, but yet the cherub face of an angel. Her skin a porcelain white. I was totally mesmerized by her gaze. The strange fog took over my thoughts as she laid me down on the floor. She reached down and caressed my cheek again.

“Do not fear me young monk. I wish you no harm. I only want answers. The young human Sebastian does not speak to us although we speak to him.” she spoke in a very thick Irish accent.

I lay there, staring at this lovely vampire. She was unlike any other creature I had ever encountered. I knew she wasn't human. My gut told me she was Maeve O'Mannan. After a few seconds of silence I was finally able to find my voice.

“He has taken a vow of silence. I have not and am more than happy to answer any questions you have Miss O'Mannan?” I asked nervously.

“How do you know who I am?” she asked, a bit shocked.

“A good guess, my lady.” I answered her shyly.

She smiled and said,“ Why are we here amongst men of the cloth.”

“I know you are the one who's blood we are fed from. I can smell the Svartálfar in you. You have begun to awaken us from our deep slumber. I know you leave flowers at my coffin almost daily. Why do you do so?.”

“I admire you.” I answered her in a stutter. I was shocked she knew about the flowers.

“Admire me? Why do you admire me, monk? ”

“I know about the war you brought upon the Coven of Cain. I believe what you tried to do was right and just. Very honorable. It's not easy going up against one's creators. This I know from personal experience.”

“What experience would a monk have when it comes to war?”

“I did have a life once outside this monastery.”

“Hmmmmm, curious. What type of monastery exactly?

“You are in the confines of a Capuchin monastery. We are of the Christian faith, known as Catholics. An order who follow the teachings of Saint Francis of Assisi. We are in a city called New Orleans. It's part of Louisiana.”

“Where is Louisiana'?”

“It is a French colony in the New World. It was founded in 1718.”

“And what year are we in?”

“We are in the Fall season and in the year 1752 of our Lord.”

“1752? I have been kept in that box for almost one hundred and eighty years!” she exclaimed in anger and shock.

“Why would men of Christian faith keep vampires locked in pine boxes? What is this place truly?” her voice grew a bit louder with anger.

She reached down and grabbed me by the robe. Her other hand shot out and wrapped tightly around my throat. “Answer me boy!”

“We are a Capuchin monastery to the outside world. But inside we are mostly vampires and several familiars who keep watch over those placed in imprisoned exile. You were sent here when this city was founded. The church is used to conceal you from the human world.”

“Who here in this God forsaken place knows of our existence?

“Only the Coven of Cain that I am aware of M'Lady. If you are hungry I will give you my blood freely. But I can not stay here. It is getting near dawn and I must get back to my room before I am found missing. I said in an almost panicked voice.

This was not a good situation. In my mind I knew all of this was not a dream, although I felt groggy. If I were to be found by the Elder Bishop, we were both screwed. And I was due for an early morning visit. I wasn't too worried about what they would do to me, it was what would happen to her. I knew I had just set eyes on this beautiful creature, but I felt a deep desire for her and to protect her at all costs. It was a feeling I had never experienced before in my life. Not even with Fenya. Was it because I was being charmed or was it true feelings within myself? I wasn't sure.

“Your presence will not be discovered.” Her hand grasped tighter. Squeezing ever so slightly, letting me know she meant business. ``Who is in charge of my imprisonment? Also, please pray tell, why would a Svartálfar be amongst human vampires in a place of God nonetheless. Am I correct? You look somewhat like one. You have the scent of one. Where are the tips of your ears? Did these religious fanatics remove them?”

“Your brother Leonardo is here as well as your uncle Bishop. They are the two in charge here. I was brought here as food for them and you. And to eventually help them in some territorial war that I plan to have nothing to do with. I am a Svartálfar and was taken from my home by my creator. The tips of my ears were cut off by my creator's concubine. She was jealous of his attention towards me.”

“And just who might your creator be? Does he reside here as well?”

“No he does not and I wish not to speak of him.” I said sternly.

“Such a bold attitude from a man of the cloth. Especially considering to whom you are speaking too. And to look me in the eyes as well. Very bold.” Her grip tightening again. Her eyes sparkled in the moonlight as I watched her trying to read me.

“Please excuse my ignorance. I forgot my place, Mistress O'Mannan.” I said calmly as I placed my hand on hers. Her grip lightened slightly.

“You offered your blood to me before. Do you offer it to me now?” she asked, releasing my throat from her grip.

“I do, willingly.”

She came in to drink from my throat, I hesitated. She looked at me angrily.

“It is strictly forbidden for us to have any flesh to flesh contact. With anyone.”

“For one as so young as you, this rule seems quite cruel. For I know you must ache for the touch of a woman.”

Her hand caressed my hair, sending a shock of ecstasy through me. It had been well over fifteen years since I had felt the gentle touch of a woman. And my body reacted accordingly. Giggling at my reaction, she came in close, kissing and licking my neck ever so softly. A shutter escaped me as she bit down. I could have stopped her from feeding, but I needed her touch. Wrapping my arms around her I held tight as she drank her fill. Her scent was intoxicating. I wanted that moment to last forever. The familiar fog overtook as I felt myself drifting off.

When I awoke in the morning I was in my own bed and she was nowhere to be found. The only proof I had what happened was real was the slight sting on the back of my neck where she fed from. I felt very drained for the rest of the day. Sleepily making my way through my chores. I went about my evening as usual, said my evening prayers and settled in for the night. No matter what I did I could not shake her image from my mind. Even flogging myself bloody did nothing to quell the desire I had for Maeve. This grew with every passing day.

Bishop Takes Pawn

It took about a month before I mustered up the courage to confide in Brother Sebastian about the visit I got from Maeve. I knew it wasn't a dream. I knew it was her, flesh and blood. But after that night, the whispers in my head and the dreams of her and Demitri had stopped. He too had confessed all had gone quiet for him as well. But not to worry. They were fine. Brother Leo was just giving them stronger elixirs to keep them asleep. After midnight prayers, we went back to his room to discuss what we should do. Upon entering we were surprised by the Elder Bishop waiting for us. He had a look of anger I had not seen for a long time. “What are you two up too?” He snapped angrily.

“We were only going to.” Brother Sebastian began to say.

“HUSH! I wish not to hear from you Brother Sebastian! Brother Nicholas, go to the chapel now. I will meet you there momentarily.” he ordered, cutting Brother Sebastian off.

“If you don't mind, I'd rather go back to my room Elder Bishop. I am very tired.”

His hand shot out and grabbed me by the throat. “You will obey me!” and shoved me out the door. Grasping me by the back of my collar and by the hair, he dragged me into the Chapel. Once inside he slammed me as hard as he could against the wall, knocking the air out of me. “How dare you have relations with him!” he yelled as I gasped for breath.

“No! I would never! He is like a little brother to me! We were just talking, please!”

He crouched down in front of me, pinning me to the wall by the throat. “So sad that you feel you must lie to me. Now I see why Rhavan resorted to certain punishments with you to keep you in line. I warned you once if it happened again you would not like the consequences. You will accept what is about to happen to you for the sins you committed against Brother Sebastian. He is feeble minded and you clearly charmed him and took advantage of him. Remove your robes.”

I stood up, defiant. He came at me and hit me hard knocking me senseless. Then picked me up and forced me over the altar. Removing the rope around my waist, he tied my wrists behind my back. I fought him, and fought him hard. Ripping my robes over my head, exposing my backside, blade placed at my throat. The Elder Bishop spoke. “Make a sound and I will slice you from ear to ear. I am the only one who will EVER feed from you. I am the ONLY one who can have your body! And if you ever feed from another or allow one to feed from you again I will let every monk here play out all their sick and twisted fantasies on you. And believe me, some would pay a pretty penny to have you. Young, soft skin. Fit body. Oh yes, I will pass you around like a meal on a platter for all to feast upon. You are never leaving this place, you forever now belong to me. I take you now as mine.” He growled into my ear as he forced himself into me, his teeth clamped into the nape of my neck, feeding at the same time. I screamed out for help. I didn't care if he slit my throat. He grabbed my face forcing it into my robes. He tore a piece of it off and tied the gag across my mouth. I struggled for air as he bit down harder on the nape of my neck and fed until the fight left my body. There he continued to rape me on the altar in our tiny chapel until the early dawn. I know the others heard my cries for help, but yet no one came to my aid. Once he tired of using me for his sexual gratification he beat me with a scourge whip until I was a bloody, sobbing mess. “The servant who knows his Master's will and does not get ready or does not do what his Master wants will be beaten with many blows.” he preached at me.“ I hope now you will never try to disobey my wishes again. Now clean up this mess. We can't have mass here if your blood is all over the altar.” He tossed a bucket at me and walked out of the chapel. I ripped the gag from my mouth and cursed them all the top of my lungs as I threw the bucket at the door behind him. My body raged in agony. I struggled to dress myself in my now tattered robe. Lying on the chapel floor a tortured broken soul I sobbed. Gut wrenching, soul tearing sobs. I had never cried like that before in my life. Not even after all I had gone through with Rhavan, had I ever felt so eternally broken. After some time, two hands gently took me and cradled me. I knew it was my dear Brother Sebastian. He brought me back to my room and cleaned me up the best he could. I was a complete mess. I could not stop crying. Even as he tried to calm me, I still shook from silent sobs. As he held me close to him, rocking back and forth, he spoke to me in a soft, calming voice. “The time draws near that we should wake those who should not be woken. The madness here can not be tolerated any longer. I am so sorry my dearest brother I could not protect you from him. It truly breaks my heart to see you like this. You have tried so hard to be something you are not, just to please them. You have paid your debt to God. You should be able to leave here.”

Those Who Shall Not Be Woken

Over the next three nights the Elder Bishop would come to my room, feed from me and rape me until he cradled me from exhaustion. I sobbed silently through it all. Each day I worked through my chores and said my prayers in a tear-filled daze. After the third night I snapped. Without a second thought after the Elder Bishop had left me for the night, I ran to wake Brother Sebastian. I told him it was time. He knew exactly what I meant. We went straight to the attic to Demitri's coffin. We figured waking him first gave us a better fighting change to escape with them. I was not scared about getting caught. I didn't even think about what those consequences could be. Slowly I opened the lid. The smell of blood and sex still upon me stirred Demitri. He rose from his slumber as I slit my wrist offering it to him. He grabbed onto it and fed fast. With his other hand he reached out and grabbed me by the throat, pulling me close to him. I froze with fear. Demitri then sunk his teeth deep into my throat feeding until he had his fill. His power was unreal. I dropped to the floor, barely conscious. He grabbed me up and dragged me over to Maeve's coffin. Pointing to it he instructed Brother Sebastian to clear off the cross on top. He quickly removed it and the shroud that covered the coffin and backed away. Demitri opened the lid and whispered something to her. Maeve sleepily sat up, stretching, and looked me straight in the eyes. Her hand reached out and caressed my cheek. I felt myself drawn closer to her. Things began to get blurry as she sank her teeth in and fed. My mind swam in an ecstasy I had never experienced before. As the feeling continued to flow over me, all went silent except for the sound of my beating heart. Time seemed to come to a stand still. As my heart slowed I heard her voice in my mind. “The gift you have given us this moment can never be repaid enough. Fear not young ones, all will be avenged.”

Demitri snatched Brother Sebastian and went in to feed from him. I grabbed weakly onto his leg, “no”, I begged. “Not him. He is an innocent. He is not a vampire. I beg you spare him. He is your ally.”

“You must go, now!” Brother Sebastian told them in a panicked voice. “I can hear them coming, there is not time to wake the others.”

Brother Sebastian led them out of the monastery unseen. Leaving my now unconscious body on the floor. Wild visions of war and death filled my head, one crashing into another like waves hitting the shore, as I lay on the floor next to the now empty coffins. I am not sure how long I had laid there before I was discovered. Heavy hands grabbed me up and began shaking me hard. “What have you done? What have you done!” As I came to it was Brother Leo shaking me. All I could do was just smile at him. A low guttural laugh began to rise from my chest. He looked at me in utter shock. 'Why Nicholas? Do you know what you've done?!?” He yelled at me.

“Ask Bishop.” I hissed. Brother Leo looked down at me bewildered, grabbed me up and took me to a small room meant for punishment. I was still too angry and incapacitated from loss of blood to truly grasp the severity of what I had done. He dropped me onto the stone floor and bound my wrists and ankles. My mouth was gagged and was left in complete darkness in the tiny room. As I lay there I wondered what happened to Brother Sebastian. Did he escape with Maeve and Demitri? I must have drifted off, because the next thing I remembered was being shaken violently. “Wake up you vile little shit!” The Elder Bishop growled as he dragged me up to my feet. I stared at him blankly. I hated him. I hated this place. At that point I didn't care what was going to happen to me. He took a knife and cut my robes from me. “You are not deserving of these robes, beast. What you have done can not even be put into proper words. The wrath of Countess O'Mannan is about to come down upon you as God's anger smote Sodom and Gomorrah!” His eyes blazed blood red with rage. He picked me up and threw me against the wall. I definitely sprung back to my feet. Even with my wrists and ankles still bound, I was determined to yield no longer to this monster and this order of vampire monks. He came at me again, slamming his body into me, knocking the air from me. Grasping my hair, he kicked me in the side of the head with his knee, knocking me silly. I saw stars. The room began to spin a bit. Brother Leo ran in at this point to try to bring some calm to the situation. As dire as it was. He took me out of the room and I was brought naked before all of the Elder monks. They all looked solemn. I didn't see Brother Sebastian among them. My heart skipped a beat. Did he run? Was he caught? I couldn't ask because what if they didn't know he was part of the plan. I couldn't risk it.

“On your knees and keep your eyes to the floor.” Brother Leo instructed.

Again, I stood defiant. I no longer would adhere to any rule they put forth to me. I was done. A sharp sting came to the back of my knees forcing me down. A very strong hand forced my head downward. The Elder Bishop stepped in front of me and snapped his fingers. Glancing up I saw the others part. There was Brother Sebastian frightened to death, bound and gagged. He was placed on his knees in front of me. I looked at him, tears filled both our eyes. I feared what they would do to him.

“These two Judases have brought tremendous shame and anger upon us from our beloved Countess. They have awoken those who should not be woken. Maeve O'Mannan and Demitri Faust have escaped with their help. Fortunately the others still slumber. Before I set sentence, do you have anything to say Nicholas?” The Elder Bishop barked at me, yanking the gag from my mouth.

“I released Maeve and Demitri of my own free will. It was my revenge on all of you for ideally standing by, while allowing such violence happen to one of your fellow Brothers and did nothing to stop it! You call yourselves men of the cloth when all you are, are coward broken down vampires! You are all damned! Let him go, as I am at a loss as to why Brother Sebastian is here. He had no involvement. Do not punish him for something I did and did alone. They only fed from me. Please I beg you, do not harm him. I have no reason to lie to you now.” tears poured from my eyes.

A look of confusion came across Brother Sebastian’s eyes. Staring back at him I urged him to stay quiet and let me take the blame. He just cried, hanging his head. I couldn't bear to see him so distraught. I cared very deeply for my brother and would do anything to protect my only friend in this hell hole. A lead coffin was placed before me. They were smart, I'll give them that. The fae and lead don't mix. It thwarts all of our magickal abilities.

“Release young Brother Sebastian, for I believe Nicholas. Now, as for you. We may not be able to destroy the abomination that you are, because you are immortal, but we can lock you away in that little box there for the rest of eternity. That is where you will stay for century after century, in the underground tombs of the Ursulines. Take Brother Sebastian to his room and keep a close eye on him. As for you, Nicholas, into your coffin.” They grabbed me and forced me into the coffin. The Elder Bishop pried my mouth open wide as Brother Leo poured some sort of bitter liquid down my throat. I choked it down as not to drown from the drink. Once they let go I spit what little was left in my mouth at the Elder Bishop. One day he and I will have it out, but now was not the time. He slapped me hard and slammed the coffin lid down. My mind swam with sudden panic. What had I done! This was it. This was my end? Something deep within me soon did not care. It was better to be locked in a lead coffin than that sick vampires fuck toy. I resigned myself to my fate, soon drifting off to sleep. Dreams of Fenya and my shipmates filled my mind.

The Greatest Gift

Someone was shaking me, hard. I opened my eyes to see a young bearded monk above me. I didn't recognize him at first. It was Brother Sebastian with a very panicked look upon his face. He had aged since I last saw him appearing to be in his early twenties. He had grown a beard that was trimmed short. His wheat colored eyes flooded with tears as he spoke to me quickly.

“I can not bear to be here any longer. The past eight years have been an unbearable hell for me here since we woke them. I have been so lost and lonely without you. They treat me as someone who belongs in an asylum. I am kept locked in my room day and night.”

My wits began to gather quickly as I remembered what had happened to land me where I presently lay. I was wrapped in heavy chains inside a lead coffin. “Wait! How long has it been? What happened to Demitri and Maeve? Get me out of here.” I said hoarsely.

Pulling me out of the coffin he continued speaking quickly, almost in a panic, “It’s summer, 1760. Maeve and Demitri made a clean escape. Nothing has been heard of them since. The Countess was enraged and demanded both us dead. Brother Leo begged and pleaded with her not to kill us and he came up with these punishments instead. Convincing her that I was insane and you used your fae charms to seduce and use me. We both know that is not true. But there is no one who will listen. Even though they said they believed you that I had no involvement I was still locked away. I had to find a way out before I truly went insane here. I was able to escape my room when one of the Brothers came to give me my evening meal. I knocked him out and ran straight up here. We do not have much time before he wakes up or is discovered. We need to escape here. I am going to ask you to do something for me that I thought I could never ask. I want you to Sire me.”

“What? I, wait. What?!?” I stammered aloud. His hand clamped over my mouth. He placed his finger to his lips telling me to be quiet. “Please do this for me. I beg you. I have thought long and hard and prayed on it for years. I know what I am doing, I know what I ask of you.”

Without a second thought, I nodded yes. Anything for my dear Brother Sebastian. He propped me up against the coffin and unwrapped the chains. As I sat still in somewhat of a haze as to all that was happening, he reached into his robe he pulled out a small blade and slit his wrists lengthwise. To help quicken his death I fed from him as well. As I felt his life force fading, and mine growing stronger than I had felt in years, I stopped feeding and slit my wrists deep to insure he fed well. I nodded to him to fed. He placed it to his lips and drank. “Drink. Drink as much as you can take, but stop as you feel my heart slowing. Never drink until one's heart stops, it could kill you. Flee from here my dear Brother Sebastian. Go find my bible. Inside it you will find the money I have been saving for when I left this place. There is about one hundred dollars. Take it all for if we both leave it will be easier for them to track us. You go, have a life brother for both of us.” I whispered sleepily.

Soon I felt myself begin to drift and did not fight it. He let go of me and fell back onto the floor where he writhed as his old body died and his new vampire self took over. I was not concerned about how he would survive without me to teach him the ways I had not. He was raised among vampires, he knew how to survive. Everything happened so fast it all felt like a dream. When he turned, he looked at me with an amazing smile I had never seen before. He was giddy. His hair turned blonde and his eyes the color of gold, almost like a cat's eyes. His skin became ivory white. He looked down at his arms in utter amazement. “I feel so, so alive! I know it sounds so strange, to be dead, but yet, to be able to smell, hear, see, with such clarity. I can even taste the air. Incredible!” We could hear shouting below. They had discovered the unconscious monk. He laid me down next to the coffin, and kissed me gently on the forehead.

“I will find Demitri and Maeve and we will come save you. I promise. Thank you my Brother. Thank you for this amazing gift. You have given me my freedom.” He turned quickly, sensing someone was coming and made his escape through the small window onto the roof. The door slammed open. The Elder Bishop and I locked eyes as I smiled defiantly. He saw the chains lying about me, the blood on and around me, and assumed it was I who killed the monk. Grabbing me up by the shirt he yelled, “I do not know how you did it, but it ends now!” He poured a very bitter tasting drink down my throat causing it to burn badly. My stomach began to turn and soon I was vomiting uncontrollably. He laughed and closed the lid. He had fed me arsenic.

Banished

I was kept locked in that coffin, wrapped in chains and heavily drugged into a deep slumber. In the thirty first year of my imprisonment I began to awaken on almost a daily basis. Brother Leo would find me sobbing, begging to be let free. He would look at me with pity and force me to drink his awful concoctions. Upon waking one day in 1774, enclosed in my current hell I overheard Brother Leo and the Elder Bishop having a very heated argument about what they were going to do about getting me to stay asleep. “What more do you expect me to do Elder Bishop? I bleed him almost dry every time before I give him the drink. Why he awakens still I can not explain. He is not like us. He is some sort of hybrid vampire, ghoul, and Svartálfar. He can not drink human blood. It makes him violently ill. I have done my best to keep him in slumber. He was finally settling in here. He found companionship with Brother Sebastian. There was nothing more than that between them. Had given us no problems for years. We even allowed him to begin a path of a Sin- Eater and he was good. He had a natural gift for it! If you would have left him alone I know I could have convinced him to join our war instead of forcing him. But no! You had to defile him! And you destroyed all of that! This problem you created can no longer be contained here.

“The problem I created?!” The Elder Bishop yelled at him.

“Yes! Your problem! You run this insane asylum of vampires acting and living as Capuchin monks, you handle this! I know what you were doing to him. You fed flesh to flesh from him from the moment he got here. Everyone knows what happened that night in the chapel. His cries for help could be heard echoing through the monastery. Arrangements with the Mother Superior have been made as you requested.” His voice trailed off with a hint of sadness.

“He got exactly what he deserved that night. Don't ever question my methods Nephew! Do you hear me! Remember your place! That! That demon is going exactly where he belongs. He will be kept there until our numbers are larger.” The Elder Bishop yelled and I heard footsteps walk away from my coffin. The lid opened and Brother Leo looked down at me with tears in his eyes. Reaching in he placed a bowl under my wrist and cut.

“Let me go, please.” Somehow I found the strength to speak.

“You know I can not do that my dear Nicholas. Now, drink this.” I refused. I clamped my mouth shut as tightly as I could. He sighed and took hold of my nose and waited patiently until I had no choice but to gasp for air. This was the usual game between us. As soon as I took a deep breath he poured the drink down my throat covering my mouth with his hand and continuing to hold my nose. I had to swallow it or choke. When he saw that I had consumed the blood herbal concoction, he let go. “Please don't make this any harder than it already has been.” He whispered to me.

“Then let me go. I promise to leave this place and disappear. I'll go back to sea. Find a far away land. Please Brother Leo.”

“I can not.”

“I thought you cared for me Brother. I thought you loved me. You heard my cries that night. You all did, and did nothing. No one came to save me. It's the least you can do for me now Brother.” Tears streamed down both our faces.

“Oh, my lovely Nicholas, I wish I could, Oh God knows, I do. But I can not. I fear others too much to take the chance you took when you woke those who shouldn't be woken. At your feet there is a small bundle of your belongings. I have arranged for it to be given to you safely once you arrive at your final destination.” He made the sign of the cross over me and closed the lid.

My final destination? What did he mean? I fought with everything I had to not let the sleep over take me. I began to sing hymns quietly to keep my mind awake. It must have been but a few moments before the lid of my coffin flew open. An enraged Elder Bishop grabbed me up by the chains that bound me and growled. “Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!” He screamed, “I am sending you somewhere no one will ever find you nor would they want to. You thought what I did to you was horrific or the tortures Rhavan put you through were horrific, wait until you see where I am sending you to you little bastard! I am sending you to my sister, the Mother Superior and believe me, with her personal attention, she will break you in ways you never thought were possible.”

“They all know Bishop. They all know I woke them to get back at you! I will come for you one day. On my very soul, I swear I will kill you.” He slammed the lid shut. I continued singing until the drink finally won.

My Introduction to The Abbey of St. Francis

The rocking of the wagon on a rough dirt road is what stirred me awake. I could tell it was Spring because I could smell the fragrances of flowering trees. How I had missed the smell of jasmine. Shafts of sunlight came though the pine box I was locked in, bouncing off the blindfold covering my eyes. I'm not sure how long we traveled until my final destination. Even with all the fear and uncertainty that I had heading towards an unknown fate, I was so very thankful to be away from Bishop and the monastery.

Upon my arrival, the coffin was removed from the carriage and carried to a small room where I was released from my prison. The blindfold and chains were gently taken off, along with my old grimy robes. With great care servants placed me into a large basin of water. The heat of it warmed my cold aching bones. A young monk, who was not a vampire, washed me, cleaned and trimmed my hair. He took great care in dressing the sores left on my body from being wrapped so tightly in chains for so long. I think I actually started to cry. His touch was so gentle and comforting. After, he dressed me in a clean white cotton shirt and undergarment. Soft leather cuffs were attached to my ankles and then carried by a house servant to a room where I was left to recover over the next few weeks. It was a small room with a window high up on the wall that I could only see the sky from. It was sparsely decorated and a bible on the tiny nightstand next to the bed. There was no other source of light than the window. I was free to roam the room but stayed in bed most of the time sleeping. It hurt too much to move. My body ached constantly. I had not been given any herbal concoctions since my arrival and I began to crave blood. I felt numb mentally and wanted nothing more to be somewhere other than Louisiana.

A dark skinned man in a wide brim black hat, black priest cassock, and beady little black eyes with a big book would come and ask me questions everyday which I refused to answer. He asked me where Rhavan was. How did the fire at his castle start? How did I escape and end up at sea? How many other fledglings did he make? Where was Kryimsson? Even though I was sent away from the monastery I still considered myself somewhat to be a man of the cloth. I had lived that life for so long it was now integrated in me, whether I wanted it or not. I used the vow of silence to my advantage. I did not know this man and was not about to tell him anything about my past for him to chronicle in his big book. In frustration, he went to the Mother Superior and told her of my unwillingness to cooperate with him. I was to be sent to her now for discipline. A guard came into my room and placed a thick leather collar with a chain, strapping it around my neck. I was stripped of my clothing and the dark man in the black hat pulled on the chain for me to follow him. I did my best to cover myself and keep what little modestly I could. As we walked through the enormous Abbey I saw some dressed in the same fashion as myself, wearing nothing but shackles and a collar. Others were dressed in varying styles of religious clothing. I did my best to keep my fear down and kept my eyes to the floor. I was led down a flight of stairs deep beneath the Abbey. The stench of death and blood was thick in the air. Two men dressed in black satin monk robes with red trim approached me out of the darkness. They dragged me to the middle of the room and there I was hung by the wrists by shackles and chains, and left to hang from the ceiling stark naked. Slowly, it began to dawn on me this was just the beginning of punishment Bishop threatened me with for releasing Maeve and Demitri. The room suddenly lit up magically from sconces on the walls and a large fireplace. When my eyes adjusted more to the lighting I froze as I saw all of the torture devices. It was worse than the dungeon Rhavan had. I caught the sight of a naked woman shackled to the wall. She was almost skin and bones, lashed, bleeding, and close to death. Her mouth was making pucker noises begging to be fed. I gasped in horror. A woman's voice behind me chuckled at my reaction. There was no one else in the room other than myself, the monks and the poor soul across from me that I could see. “That is what happens to those who do not follow my rules. She was caught harming a Confessional of my court which resulted in her death.”

An older, very tall, blonde haired woman with green eyes approached me. She was dressed in a very elaborate Nun's habit, deep red velvet fabric with gold trim and religious adornments stood in front of me, examining me first with her eyes, then she went hands on. Her icy fingers pinched my skin to see how thin I was, forced open my mouth to check my teeth, then searched my nethermost regions thoroughly. I was absolutely mortified as she groped at me to see my reaction to her touch and how quickly I responded. She noted my discomfort and continued on with her examination.“What is his name?”

“The letter that arrived with him says, Brother Nicholas Taylor.” the man in black answered.

“Is he the one sent to us by Cardinal Bishop, Brother Uzel?”

“Cardinal now, Bishop. My, my, you have been busy while I slept.” I thought to myself.

“Yes, he is Mother Superior. It states he had been locked in a coffin for over thirty years and the Cardinal Bishop says every effort to keep him in slumber has failed and they can no longer risk keeping him at the monastery while under continued rule of the Spaniards in New Orleans.”

“So, he is the one who awoke those who should not be awakened.” she commented coldly, stepped away and slapped me hard across my face splitting my lip. Mother Superior walked over to the wall and grabbed a thin switch. I closed my eyes and readied myself the best I could. I concentrated hard on not giving in. But it had been so long since I received a beating in this fashion I broke quickly. Deep welts formed on my chest, legs and back. When she got to my backside she beat me bloody. I cried out, begging and pleading for her to stop. I couldn't take any more. She then nodded to the two monks to lift my legs up to expose the bottom of my feet. They were lashed bloody as well. I screamed out for mercy. She motioned for my legs to be dropped forcing all my weight on the fresh wounds. The pain was unbearable and I did my best to stay on my tiptoes as she tried to knock me off balance. But I stood my ground. I think I may have heard a chuckle of surprised amusement come from her. Snapping her fingers, the monk released me from the shackles and forced me onto my hands and knees in front of the nun's feet. He pushed my face to her feet. “Kiss them.” she instructed me. I hesitantly did as instructed. My head was roughly pulled back by my hair so I was now looking up at her. “Time to test your limits.” She nodded again, and I felt the monk grab onto my hips and forced my legs open with his knees while pulling up his robes. “You squirm, cry out, beg, or try to deflect the beating about to be administered to you, he will enter you. Do you understand Brother Nicholas?” I feverishly nodded that I understood. With that established she handed the other monk the cat-o-nine tails and told him to begin. He unleashed a beating upon my body unlike any I had ever received at that moment in my life. The skin tore open wide with each hit. After the tenth lash, I broke. I could not hold back anymore. My body collapsed into the bloody floor under me. Grabbing my hips, the monk lifted my backside to meet his groin. At first he tested to see how tight I was by working his finger into my rear. My hand instinctively went to stop him as I tried to wiggle away from him. The other monk grabbed me and forced me back onto my stomach keeping his foot on my head. Again, my waist was lifted up and the monk worked his finger inside me, I grunted out in pain. I felt something wet hit the orifice and then the searing burn as he forced himself deep inside me. I screamed out and tried to pull free of him but was held fast by the other monk.

“Quiet him! I do not wish to hear from this blasphemer.” Mother Superior snapped. The second monk took hold of my face and forced a leather circular bit in my mouth forcing it wide open. He proceeded to use my mouth for his sexual gratification. This was the first time I was forced to give fellatio. He was purposely gagging me and snickering at the sounds I made. My mind desperately searched for a way to cope with this current terror. I couldn't let them break me. I would not let them break me. I repeated over and over in my mind.

“Give him a taste of what is in store for him.” Mother Superior commanded. The two monks did exactly that. After giving my body a good work over, they tired of this position and placed me back in the wrist shackles hanging from the ceiling. Pulling down on the chains holding the shackles, I was lifted off my feet leaving me dangling a few feet off the ground. Next a piece of rope was tied around my ankle and the other end around my waist, lifting my leg off the ground allowing them full access to every part of me. This sexual abuse continued on for hours. When they had finally spent the last of their seed, they released me from the shackles. Bound my arms and wrists, then wrapped the rope around my chest. It felt like tiny needles scratching against my skin. I was then placed on my stomach and my ankles were bound together and tied to the rope around my chest pretty much leaving me hogtied. A chain was attached to the rope and I was lifted up off the floor. As my weight shifted the rope dug deeper into my torn flesh. The Mother Superior walked over to the wall of torture devices. My eyes followed her as she chose her weapons of choice. She picked up a switch and a snake whip. As she walked back to me the fear was evident in my eyes. She stepped close and caressed my face. Her scent was intoxicating. I could feel myself being drawn to her. I knew I was in for it.“ No, I beg you.” I stammered.

“Hush child, there are some things I need to know about you and it seems this is the best way to get the truth from you. If you lie to me I will know. If you are honest it will go quickly. Brother Uzel will be writing down all you say.” She caressed my cheek again. “First off, what is your name?”

“Brother Nicholas Taylor.” I answered quickly.

She came over and grabbed me by the back of my hair. I felt meek. “Release his legs''. She instructed the monks. Then stepped away again letting the switch hit my back a few times. I refused to cry out. It took all of my will to hold it back.

“Mmmmm, Brother? Interesting. You are not being honest and a fellow man of the cloth no less. Shame, shame. You know the Lord doesn't approve of liars. Now, give me your real name Svartálfar.”

How could she tell I was a Svartálfar. Did she know of Rhavan's journals? Was it Bishop who told her? Or Brother Leo? Perhaps then again her weapon of choice should have tipped me off. The snake whip. I was now terrified of this woman and feared telling her my real name. Since she knew I was Svartálfar, then she may likely have heard of the household I was from. Was she going to send me back to Wales? Suddenly a sickening crack echoed through the dungeon as she hit me with the snake whip. I let out a loud yelp. I had not felt the sting in many, many, many, a year. Let me tell you, I didn't miss it at all.

“Full name little monk!”

“Nienar Tazbbár.” I grunted.

“See Brother Nicholas, that wasn't so hard, now was it. I know you are telling me the truth because you look just like Queen Jeni Tazbbár. Don't worry your handsome little head my boy, your secret is safe with us. I have no plans to send you back there. They no longer exist since you destroyed the Svartálfarhiemr. I have my own plans for you.”

A small sigh of relief escaped me. She chuckled at my reaction and continued on. “I see you have tried to hide your true identity to fit in with humans by cutting the tips of your ears off. Interesting approach.” She grabbed me by the throat and squeezed hard. I looked at her confused. “I wonder what else you are hiding. Why would you cut off the tips of your ears? Why not just glamor?”

“I didn't cut them off.” I said through clenched teeth.

“Then who?”

“A vampire's concubine cut them off. She was jealous. She felt our Sire was paying too much attention to me..”

She dug a sharp nail into my flesh hard drawing a touch of blood, licking a bit off the tip. “I am assuming when you say Sire you mean Rhavan. Ahhhhh, pure Svartálfar blood. Something I haven't had for centuries. You have done a very good job of hiding to survive this long. A Svartálfar vampire at that. A very, very rare breed. Your kind does not survive long due to the lust other vampires have for fae blood. And in the end, well, they just kill themselves off because of the shame they have for being an undead Svartálfar. And a pirate too? I can see how staying at sea can keep one like you safe and not have many questions asked. Someone like you doesn't just end up a priest. Who do you think may have saved you from the gallows?”

“The Coven of Cain.” I answered in a frantic voice. I just wanted the beating to stop. The whole ordeal was really starting to overwhelm me. I hadn't fed in over thirty years and the smell of my own blood made me almost fiend for it. I began to feel extremely ill. Mother Superior instructed the monks to pull down on the chains holding the shackles, lifting me off my feet leaving me dangling a few feet off the ground. My shoulders and wrists screamed in pain. She walked over to the wall and picked out the nastiest switch she could find. She walked slowly back to me with a sweet but wicked smile on her face. I shook my head pleading for her not to hit me anymore. One of the monks took a piece of rope and tied one end around my ankle and the other end around my waist. He did the same with the other ankle as well. This left the bottom of my feet exposed. She thrashed my feet until they bled. I cried out for her to stop. Tears streamed down my cheeks.

“Now, next question. Where is your Sire? The one who embraced you!”

I couldn't tell her. It would mean a lifetime of torture. A look of frustration crossed her face and she hit me a few more times on the soles of my feet. I begged her to stop. My mind swam for an answer to give her. “Who is your Sire?” she yelled at me.

“Kryimsson Giddeon!” Technically I could say Kryimsson was my Sire because he did bring me back from the brink of death and it was better than the real truth. Plus I had learned so much about the world and other things from him than I ever did from Rhavan. To me, Kryimsson was my true Sire.

She grabbed me and forced me to look at her. She stared into my eyes drawing me in. I watched as she tried to read my mind. She stepped back from me and studied me for a bit. Her eyes grew wide as she noticed the brand on my chest. My heart skipped a beat as she grabbed my throat digging her nails in.

“LIAR! Kryimsson is not your Sire, boy! You carry Rhavan's mark!” she slapped me hard across the face and screamed poking me in the chest. ``The mark of Rhavan Albrecht! How did you get that?

“I am sorry I lied, please! Forgive me! I beg you. Yes! Yes Rhavan is my Sire.” I prayed she would believe me. “I was held captive by him. He did that to mark me as his.”

“Where is he?” she said squeezing tighter.

“He's dead.” I gasped trying to catch my breath.

“YOU LIE!” She began to beat me all over my body until I was sobbing, begging for her to believe me.

“He is dead! I swear on Our Lord! I saw him die. He was attacked by his fledglings the night of the ball. I tried to stop them, but, but.” I sobbed in near hysterics. Technically, I was being honest. I did see him die.

“Why did you not try to save your Sire?”

“I was badly wounded in the attack, Kryimsson and I almost didn't make it out.”

“And Kryimsson?” Where is that trader?” Her tone turned sad as her grip on my throat lessened.

“I don't know. I haven't been able to contact him since our ship went down in 1730. I was picked up floating in the ocean by a British Navy ship and locked away in the Marshalsea Prison for ten years before being sent to New Orleans.” It flooded out through clenched teeth. She let go of my throat and wiped the tears from my cheeks and whispered, “Perhaps now there will be no more disobedience when I ask you simple questions. This will be the worst beating you will ever receive at my hands provided you follow the rules and do your part here. Do you understand? Cardinal Bishop was correct, you will make a fine addition to my little collection.”

She ran her fingers through my hair. I nodded yes that I understood. Her fingers then went to my neck. The Mother Superior chuckled then latched on. A shot of ecstasy went through my body. She drank her fill until I was left in a euphoric state. When I looked at her, she had become younger. Once again, my blood was their youth serum. The two monks gasped at seeing her drastic change. She rushed to a large mirror at the end of the room. “My, my my. Rhavan, my beloved nephew, you did it! It's true! You found the one! Oh, my boy.” She cackled evilly as she continued to look at her reflection. After a bit of admiring her reflection she turned her attention toward me once again. “Do you have anything else to say?” Mother Superior asked.

I shook my head no.

“Are you sure?” Was the last thing I remember hearing before I passed out.

Torture Unlike Any Other

Something jarred me back to consciousness. As my sight became clearer, laying on the floor across the room were the two monks. Both their throats had been torn out. Stepping out from the shadows a robed figure came into view. At first I thought it was the Mother Superior, come to check on me, but once I was able to focus I could see it wasn't. Something about this figure seemed very familiar but I couldn't place it. My senses were spent from all the abuse I just received. I could see blood still on the cold white hand that caressed my chest for a few moments as it studied me. Then it dug it's sharp nails in, leaving deep bloody scratches. I grunted in pain as it licked the blood from it's fingers. The robed figure continued to study me again for a few more moments walking around me. It took my hand in theirs and snapped my pinky finger. I screamed out as it shoved a thick piece of leather in my mouth wrapping a swatch of cloth around tying it behind my head to muffle my cries. It laughed at the agony it had me in as they continued to break every one of my fingers.

“Where is Rhavan?” The figure spoke in a deep, seductive and terrifying at the same time. The robed being released the chain that suspended me. When I hit the floor I heard a sickening crack and my arm went numb. The rope was then cut and it flipped me over onto my back and jumped on me pinning my arms above my head. That is when I felt the pain of the broken collar bone, but it didn't stop me from trying to fight back. I arched my hips up then turned to my side, knocking it off me. I was able to get to my feet and staggered towards the stairs cradling my arm and mangled hands. My feet felt like I was walking on glass. It easily tackled me and pulled me up by the hair bringing me over to a vice. Placing my right wrist within it, tightened it around my wrist trapping my hand. I shook my head feverishly as it pulled a blade from it's belt. The strange horrible creature giggled maniacally as it slipped the tip of the blade under my fingernail. I screamed out as loud as I could through the gag, praying someone would hear me. I tried to pull myself free from the vice but only succeeded in dislocating my wrist. It proceeded to rip each one of my fingernails off. Once done with the right hand it then released me and placed my other wrist in the vice. I struggled and kicked as hard as I could but its strength was incredible. They just laughed at my feeble attempts to get free and continued to have their fun. It released me once again and left me there for a moment as they searched for the next torture for me. I cradled my mangled hands as I reeled in agony. It grabbed me again by the hair and dragged me over to the wall. On our way towards the wall it scooped a hand full of long nails. They used two of them to impale me to the wall through my wrists. Their strength was unreal.

“There you go little monk, you are now even more like our precious Lord.” growled the robed figure.

By this point I was beginning to black out from the pain. They made sure I didn't by throwing cold water on me. It definitely shocked me awake. As I struggled to stay conscious as it sat in a chair and watched my suffering with glee. In time, they got up and came to me.

“Have anything to say to me?” asked the figure.

Suddenly it hit me like a lightning bolt to my heart. It was Bishop! Panic and rage gripped me. “Fuck you!” I cursed through the gag, my eyes burned red with rage.

“Ah, there we are. That's what I wanted to see. That strong Svartálfar spirit. Give me your anger little boy. Just like you gave to me in the chapel. Now that I have some alone time with you, I am going to torture you in ways you never imagined.” He laughed, slamming my head against the wall knocking me out.

I awoke to the most terrifying thing I had ever experienced in my life. My eyes were sewn shut! I struggled with every bit of strength I had to get loose from the wall, but the nails held steadfast. Bishop was right, this was the worst. His laughter echoed off the walls of the dungeon as he watched me panic. I could hear his footsteps come closer causing the panic to rise even higher.

“It's sad that all that it all came to this. It saddens me greatly. If you would have only obeyed. If you had never woken Demitri and Maeve we could have continued our little love affair. I know deep down you enjoyed it as much as I. I wonder, did you think they were going to free you from us? Sad. Very sad. They really never cared and were only using you. Maeve and Demitri left you in the monastery to rot. Did you really think they would come rescue you? Is that what they promised? Haahahahaaaaaaahaaaaaa! It's been over thirty years. Naïve child.” He cackled at me. That laugh. How I hated the laugh. I kicked out blindly at him. I wanted him to shut up. I screamed at Bishop in anger through the gag. It couldn't be true.

“Awwww, did something I say upset you? Was it how I loved taking you? Just as when Rhavan took you in front of his brood. Your blood makes us young again, and your sexual energy, oh my. Are you sure you didn't enjoy it when we fucked? Not even a little?” he cackled. “Come on Nicholas, a creature as sexual and alluring as yourself had to enjoy it. The men of your race are bred for this purpose am I not correct? To be used for pleasure and breeding then to be sacrificed. Perhaps I should take you again. Perhaps I will breed you.”

I grunted in anger at him as he laughed at my struggling and frustration at what he was saying to me. I felt a tugging at my hair. Then another, and another. The bastard was cutting off my hair! I kicked out at him again. He stopped long enough to bind my feet together so I could no longer interrupt his fun. I swear, if I could have gotten loose, I would have ripped his heart out with my bare hands right then and there. Rage kept building as Bishop kept on talking and cutting off my hair. My body was shaking violently.

“Kryimsson tired of you as he does with all his fledglings. There are many you know. Left every one of them behind. He abandoned his own twin sister and allowed her to be imprisoned. He did nothing to try and free her. Do you really want to know how we found you? Kryimsson told us in exchange of us leaving him to go live his life. He left you to rot in Marshalsea Prison. And now he's abandoned you like the rest, and gone on with his life. But then again you are nothing but an abomination that was best locked away. I can see why now he let you rot in prison.”

Bishop took the knife and lightly traced the brand on my chest. As he traced it, it began to hurt more and more. Soon it became excruciating. He was cutting the skin, reopening the scar. The sharp blade continued down my chest, down my stomach and stopped right at the top of my groin. An icy cold hand grabbed my manhood tightly. I felt the tip of the blade right under my scrotum.

“Oh, the joy in just thinking about one so young going through eternity as a eunuch. Perhaps we can use you in our choir as a castrati. You do have a lovely singing voice. I have missed you singing the hymns. The beautiful sounds you made as I fucked you. I will take you every night forcing you to my will. Ah, the thought of it brings joy to my blackened heart. No one would have much use for you after that. Even as handsome as you are.” 9He pulled harder and placed the blade right at the base of the shaft. Sinking his teeth into my neck as he continued to squeeze my cock tighter and tighter. I freaked! The fear of losing my manhood gave me the strength to pull my right wrist off the nail. Bishop stopped feeding as I reached out to grab him. My actions must have startled him because I felt something sharp stick into my chest over and over in an odd pattern. The thin blade must have punctured my lung as I began to choke on blood. I struggled hard to remove the tight gag from my mouth with broken fingers but it was no use. I was drowning in my own blood. “So, this is how it ends.” I thought to myself. “This monster wins?”

“They are going to turn you into a sex slave and force you to sleep with all of the male clergy. You will be their house whore. Sharing you with whomever they wish. Mother Superior is going to let men tie you down and take you over and over.” Bishop's voice stopped suddenly and the room was eerily quiet.

My body was tired, shaking from adrenaline and shock. I hung there against the cold stone wall with the left wrist still nailed in while blood poured out of the right. Praying someone would come find me before he did permanent damage to me or I drowned in my own blood. I couldn't take it anymore. I didn't know what to think, was he just messing with my head or was he telling the truth. I felt my mind beginning to slip. The thoughts of this being my fate was more than I could take. I screamed out a gargled, muffled cry. A servant must have heard and came down and found me in dire straits. I felt someone touching me. I shook my head violently as the hands tried to gently touch my face. A small gasp escaped someone as other voices came near. More hands touched me and I began to blindly lash out. I grunted and kicked at those who I would later find out were there to help me. I struggled to breathe as someone cut the gag away from my mouth. Instantly I began to vomit up large amounts of blood. The spike holding me to the wall released allowing me to collapse into someone's arms. A warm cloak was wrapped around me. I was held tightly as a soft voice spoke to me. “Drink this. It will help calm you and ease your pain.” Within a few minutes I calmed down as the adrenaline rush passed. I continued to cough up blood and struggle to breathe. The extreme agonizing pain I was in began to fade and I passed out again.

I remember floating in a warm bath where I faded in and out of consciousness as a servant washed me gently, cleaning out the blood and cut what was left of my hair short. He took great care in dressing the wounds and wrapped cloth around my eyes after the stitching was removed. My vision was gone for the moment. After, he dressed me in a clean soft cotton shirt and undergarment. Soft leather cuffs were attached to my ankles and then the servant carried me to a room to let me recover under guard, lock and key.

Last Rites

My sight was gone. All I could see was flashing little lights exploding over and over in the vast darkness. My entire body was on fire with a raging fever. Someone touched me and I recoiled back. I tried to speak but nothing came out. I wanted to motion I couldn't see but my hands were bandaged and hurt too much to move. A hand gently touched my arm trying to comfort me. “Stay still please.” a gentle male voice said. A cup was placed to my lips to drink. After a few sips I fell back to sleep. Two days later, I was no better. The shaking wouldn't stop and my wounds weren't healing. The constant pain was tormenting. They fed me food and blood but all it did was come back up. I still couldn't see or speak. I was trapped in my own mind surrounded by darkness and pain. As Bishop taunted my thoughts. I began to slip into a deep despair.

On the third night a man who identified himself as a priest came to my room and sat next to me on the edge of the bed. He placed the sign of the cross on my forehead, then placed a rosary in my heavily bandaged hand, gently wrapping my broken fingers around it. I moaned out in agony.

“Let me help you end your suffering, young one. You will never stop being punished for what you did. They will drive you mad, my son. There is no place on this earth for your kind any longer. You are an abomination to all Kindred. You are a sinner against the church. If you decide to continue on in your existence, you will become a blind, mute, ghoul. To feed off the flesh of the living. That is the fate God has sentenced you to. Rid yourself from this world boy. I promise your suffering will end. I will help you find peace and absolution.” he whispered into my ear.

It took all what little strength I had to pull myself up with his help, resting my head against the headboard. The priest was right. This was never going to end. I was alone here. I was tired. I just couldn't take it anymore. I prayed to Jesus and God himself to forgive me for the mortal sin I was about to commit and hoped I would still be welcome in His kingdom, then crossed myself. Tears streamed down my face as I felt a knife slice up the vein on my right arm, then the left one. He then led my hand to my heart. I took a deep breath and nodded my head that I was ready. He placed the knife to my chest and together we plunged that blade deep the hilt. I felt my heart skipping beats and struggling to work. I prayed this time my life would end. At the time I still wasn't grasping the hard fact that I was immortal and just wanted my suffering to end. And being still so young I didn’t really know any better how to cope. A feeling of peaceful calm came over me. I was no longer in pain. No longer afraid. I was finally free. I heard yelling and a scuffle as I slipped away into nothingness.

Blinding light shone down on me. I shielded my eyes the best I could. I was standing in a vast field filled with wildflowers. I looked down to see I was dressed in a nice white shirt, white vest. Light leather bracers on my wrists. Black silk pants and bare feet. The grass felt amazing under my feet. So soft and luscious. I looked across the field. As my sight became clearer I could see a figure in a flowing white dress picking flowers and dancing in the field. She saw me watching her and came running towards me. She leaped into my arms and wrapped her arms tightly around me. I knew as soon as she was in my arms it was Fenya. Could it be true? Were we really back together? I placed her down gently and looked at her. Oh my heart had ached for this day. I missed her so much. We kissed passionately for sometime as we lay in the tall grass amongst the wildflowers. My head rested on her lap as she caressed my hair as the sun warmed my face, enjoying each other's energy and company.

“Where am I?” I asked. I wasn't frightened or worried. Actually I was very much at peace.

“You are trapped in between worlds my darling love.” she said, kissing my forehead.

“I want to stay here with you.” I answered, kissing her delicate hand.

“Nienar, you can not stay in limbo. You need to go back. It's not your time my love. I want you here too, but you have so much to live for. Your friends need you.”

Oh how I had missed how she said my name. I missed her scent, the feel of her skin, the flower fragrance of her hair. “Fenya, I don't want to go back. Living has become unbearable. Even Kryimsson has forsaken me. My beloved fledgling is lost to me. I have no trust in those around me. Don't make me go back.” I said pleadingly.

“Did they truly abandon you or are you just lost to them? Do not always believe the worst of someone or a situation because someone tells you something you do not want to hear. There are many around you with knives for tongues. I know you live in great fear. There are those who are willing to help but you must be patient. They will find you. You will learn to trust, and love again. Baby, you need to go back. You are so young and have a lot of good to come in your long life. Yes, it's been very hard and unfair thus far but you have to go back. It's not your time. It's not your time...not our time. Reach out for help my love, reach for their hand.” Fenya's voice faded as everything began to swirl around me.

Brother

I felt like I was falling. I reached out to stop myself and someone grabbed my hand. Opening my eyes I saw a young man sitting at my bedside holding my hand gingerly. “Am I dead?” I asked in a weak whisper.

“You are very much alive my friend. Although you are very weak right now.” He said very concerned.

“You called me, 'friend'. How do you know me? There is something familiar about you.” My sight was still severely impaired.

“It's me , Sebastian.” he said with love.

At first I didn't recognize him. I stared at him a bit. His hair was now blonde and was much longer. He had a beard of reddish-blonde and wore spectacles. Those eyes. I remember those golden cat colored eyes. It was really him! He had not forsaken me! Fenya was right. Tears flooded my eyes as I began to sob silently. He leaned in and hugged me tight. I didn't need to tell him a thing. He knew I was in sorry shape and emotionally drained. I was so relieved to see him. I thanked God for him being alive. Eventually, I was able to compose myself. Sebastian sat back down and just sat and looked at me for a few minutes, then spoke. Bewildered he asked, “Why Nicholas? Why would you try to kill yourself? It was a silly move on your part since you know you can't die. But I have to say you did give it a really good try. You really gave the Mother Superior a good scare. It would not look good upon their Coven.”

“Why are you here? Not safe for us. They know what we did.” I whispered.

“To try and protect you and to help get you out of here. Brother Leo knew once you were out of the monastery and out of his sight, he could no longer protect you from Bishop. He somehow found me, and begged me to infiltrate the Abbey, and try my best to keep you from harm until we can find a way to get you free of here and these wretched vampires. They do not know who I am. It is our secret. I go by the name of Simon here. You're burning up with fever so please settle down.” He placed a cold compress on my forehead.

“Don't let me become a ghoul. Promise me!”

“What? A ghoul? Oh now stop that. You are not going to turn into a ghoul. I promise. Who told you that?”

“The priest who came to give me last rites.”

“Oh, him. That was no priest. That was one of Bishop's cronies trying to take you out. He fears you greatly. They assume it was the same person who attacked you in the dungeon. The things Bishop did to you were very taboo and very against the rules. Even with being the Countess' O'Mannan and Mother Superior's brother would not save him if it was ever found out the extent of his deeds at the monastery.”

So, the bastard feared me. That right there gave me more than enough reason for me to survive this new hell just to see him skewered on the end of my sword.

“Do you know who tortured you in the dungeon? Did you recognize them?”

“Ey, it was Bishop. Please don't say anything.” I started shaking again just thinking about it. My collarbone ached and my fingers began to feel like they were on fire.

“Please try to put it to the back of your mind for now. I know you are in a lot of pain. Here, drink. It will help you heal.” he said, giving me something to drink to calm my nerves. It felt the moment I closed my eyes I was falling. Everything swirled around me until my vision became clear. I was in a great hall of a Keep. Out of the shadows Kryimsson emerged with Maeve on his arm. Gasps of amazed awe filled the room from the many guests in attendance. It was a wedding. Maeve was dressed in a beautiful blood red gown with a train that flowed six feet behind her. He led her to the front of the crowd and gave her hand over to Demitri who was waiting for her. I couldn't move. I was on my knees before her. Kryimsson handed her a stiletto and she whispered something in my ear like that I should sacrifice myself as a wedding gift to her and groom. Against my will, I watched helpless as I began to stab myself with the knife. Suddenly Sebastian was in front of me shaking me and fighting me for the blade. It turned out, due to the high fever I had I began to hallucinate and somehow got hold of a knife that was left on a dinner plate in my room. I ended up really doing a number on myself. For the next three weeks I was kept in a deep sleep to recover and prevent me from harming myself again.

What I remember next was waking up to Sebastian reading a book at my bedside. I was happy to know that it wasn't just a dream or hallucination the last time I saw him. I was feeling slightly better. My bones felt like they had healed but still ached. My vision was less blurry. The bandages had been removed and the nails on my fingers had grown back. The wounds in my wrists had healed as well leaving behind a faint scar.

“How are you feeling Nicholas?”

“Everything hurts Sebastian. My hands feel like they are on fire.”

“Please, feed.”

He quickly pulled up the sleeve of his shirt and made a small cut on his wrist. He sat behind me letting my back rest on him. Hesitantly, I fed. A few moments later I began to feel much better. It had been a very long time since I drank blood and didn't get ill from it. Panic came out of nowhere and I turned quickly to him. “Where am I? What is this place?”

“Calm yourself. You are still at Abbey not too outside of New Orleans. We are still in Louisiana, right near the Mississippi River. The Mother Superior is the head of the Coven of Cain now. This is their temple, their meeting grounds.”

“Why are you here? This is no place for you. Do you know what they do here?” The fear was very apparent in my voice.

“Calm, Nicolas, calm. Please. It's alright. I know what I am doing. I had to come here. You took the full blame for releasing Maeve and Demitri which spared my life. As much as Leo begged his Mother, the Countess O'Mannan, to spare us both, she wanted us dead. When you made your confession in front of the whole congregation, they had no choice but to spare me. As far as where we are presently, I know exactly what goes on here. That is why I infiltrated this place in order to get you out. This plan was placed in motion when word reached me that you would be sent here. I still have a loyal connection back at the monastery. Did you really think we would leave you?” He asked in a sad tone. It began to come back to me. It was Brother Leo who contacted him.

“I don't know what to believe honestly. My mind is like a storm with fear. We need to get away from here. This place broke me Sebastian. Down in that dungeon they broke me.” My panic rose more and more as the thoughts of what happened to me raged through my head.

“I promise, things are in motion even as we speak. Try to stay calm, and do not fight them. It's what they want. If you don't fight they bore easily.”

“Why would you put yourself in such a place, for me? The pain and torture?”

“I have been lucky enough not to draw the attention of any of them. If you come here to work as a servant, stay quiet, do as told, and keep to the shadows, one can survive very easily. I have seen what they have done to the likes of those who have been sent here, as you have. Rarely do they ever survive. They are shocked that you lived through all that Bishop did to you. And I have a feeling Mother Superior is as well. But be warned, they are very determined to find out what happened to Rhavan Albrecht knowing you were the last person he wrote about in his journal before he disappeared. The plans for the ball he held the night of the fire were very detailed. All had believed you perished in his castle from the fire until you were found through prison records. Do you know what happened to him?”

“He’s dead.” I answered, softly not looking at him.

“They don’t quite believe that.” He said sadly.

I sat, frozen, absorbing all he had just told me. I was so thankful he was there, but I didn’t believe him about the escape plan. I felt he was just saying it to ease my mind, knowing there was no way out for me. “Wait! You mentioned, 'we'. Who else knows I am here?”

“Maeve and Demitri of course.” He smiled. “After I escaped from the monastery I searched them out. They started the Coven of the Children of Lilith. Apparently their legend survived their imprisonment and hundreds of lost fledglings joined the coven within months of their escape, making it now the largest one in the New Orleans territory. The Coven of Cain tried to destroy them, but in the end only succeeded in destroying their own. The Countess was murdered by a group of renegade vampires during the uprising. The Mother Superior, her youngest sister, is now the highest ranking member of the Coven of Cain. She took over for the Countess O'Mannan. The only safe haven they have now are these abominable places of worship which was outlined in a temporary truce between all Covens here in Louisiana. Anything you need, food, wine, books, I can get them for you. A young woman named Lady Char will be in charge of your other lessons and helping you become accustomed to what goes on here until we can make our escape happen. She does not know of our plans so we must be careful around her. You need to remember to refer to me as Simon from now on. I know I am asking you to stay strong in what must feel like the worst living hell you have ever endured. But, I promise you my Sire, I will free you from here. We will sail the seas you have spoken of. We will travel and live like young bachelors.” He said with a faint smile, hugged me and then hurried out of the room.

Did he just call me 'Sire'? It snapped me out of my own fear for the moment. That night had slipped from my memory. I really thought it was all a dream. It all happened so quickly. I pushed it from my mind. I had to for both our safety. I would not put him in further danger. My mind immediately began to figure out my survival plan for my current situation. Running was not an option. I was locked in a room with a guard at the door at all times. For all the horror I had already been put through, the room was the most beautiful I had ever stayed in. Better than being kept in a coffin and I was very thankful for that much. The bed linens were the softest cotton I had ever felt. The bookshelves were full of texts about herbalism, folklore and religion. Paper for manuscripts and art supplies for illuminations were on a small writing desk in the corner by a window. And a small table with two chairs for dining. I decided to do my best to settle into my new environment.

The Confessionals

The next morning I awoke feeling refreshed after a really good sleep. I was able to move my fingers and wrist with a bit of discomfort along with my arm. All of my fingernails had grown back. My collarbone had healed and my other wounds seemed to be healing quicker as well. Perhaps it had something to do with feeding from Sebastian I thought to myself as I sat up in bed and stretched. A knock at the door startled me. A young woman in her early thirties dressed in an eloquent blue and black lace trim dress and an ornately jeweled cross hanging from her neck, came in with a tray of food. She placed it on the small table then sat down. She then patted the other chair for me to come join her.

“Come, come, I promise I won't bite. I have brought you some food to start your day with.” she said with a sweet thick French accent.

There was a fresh croissant and a cup of tea. The last time I had eaten one was when I was able to sneak one into the monastery to split with Sebastian. Climbing out of bed I did my best to look presentable and sat down next to her. Slowly letting my guard down and enjoyed every sweet bite of that wonderful, buttery, flaky, sweet croissant. The tea was also perfect. The woman sat and watched me with wonder. I stopped and looked at her inquisitively.

“I have never seen one enjoy such a simple breakfast before. I was told you were sent from New Orleans, so I brought you a proper meal. Yes?”

“Yes.” I responded softly.

“How are you feeling this morning? Your hands and fingers look healed.”

“Still a bit sore but much better thank you.” I responded, wiggling my fingers.

“I am Lady Char, Nicholas and I am to be your mentor as a 'Confessional'. You will refer to me as 'My Lady', and serve me as I wish. Is this understood?”

I choked on the food a bit and stared dead at her. What on God's earth was that? “I am a bit confused My Lady, what exactly is * cough * a Confessional?” I coughed a bit more trying to clear my throat. She went on to explain what my fate as a Confessional was to be. “First and foremost a Confessional must have a very high threshold for pain. Since you survived the attack from some mysterious source in the dungeon and your own attempted suicide, you are a perfect candidate. Being Svartálfar and vampire helps as well.”

I felt myself grow numb as she continued to tell me what was in store. Confessionals gave absolution to those of the cloth by allowing them to act out their sins that could not be performed on others or were highly against the Church rules. From Cardinals to mere monks. Nuns as well. Glorified sex slave is what it really was in my opinion. Confessors told us their deepest, dirtiest secrets and then after the confession the Confessional blessed them with absolution through simple blessings to submissive surrender. A Confessional was to give pleasure in all facets of sex, no matter how deviant the act. Confessionals could also give physical discipline. Currently all the Confessional were female. I was the first male to ever survive Mother Superior's test, which would put me in high demand among the clergy. I should also mention here, that, all that came to this wretched place were vampires who wore the cloth. And there are a lot of them. Even to this day. Vampires deeply believe that they are the closest thing to God Himself because they could also give and take life as He does.

Things at this Abbey were much more religiously rigid and enforced unlike at the monastery back at the St. Louis Cathedral. We had to be knowledgeable in all facets of Christianity as we did not just cater to Catholics. While also being very skilled in giving pleasure whether it be through passion or pain. I would have to take religious classes daily, plus trained in all sexual practices. When a Confessor is sent to receive a Confession, they are to enter the room and prostate themselves in front of them saying, “I am here to receive your confession and to serve you as you wish.” And remain there until instructed otherwise. There was strict hygiene protocol as well. All Confessionals must be well groomed, bathed, nails kept, and always dressed in clean clothing. I would be given a tattoo as well on my inner forearm of the Jerusalem cross and beneath 'IHS' (In His Service). I still carry that tattoo to this day. We were dressed in the finest religious robes and vestments which signified our status within the Abbey. The robes for the females were that of elaborate Nuns habit, black velvet with gold and red silk trim. I wore black velvet priest cassock with a hood and a red silk sash with gold fringe at the end, that wrapped around the waist. Ankle and wrist cuffs of soft leather were to be worn at all times. A decorative collar made of silver was placed around each of our necks.

We were kept separated from each other and the rest of the residence and servants of the Abbey and heavily guarded. We each had an assigned servant that catered to our every whim. A Confessional's quarters were small but lavish with the best linens, beautiful furniture and bookshelves full of books and other trinkets. Those who tried to run were locked away in tombs and never seen again. If a Confessional fought back against a Confessor or showed the slightest bit of resistance, they would be severely punished, beaten, tortured or locked away in the tombs. The Coven of Cain would then abandon them and that left the person open to all for attack. Forced in chains to work the brothels in town which were owned by various smaller covens that catered strictly to the vampire community. Those who behaved and did as instructed at all times could receive gifts, coin, and other trinkets as tokens for what they endured at the hands of Confessors. It was thought better to have them come to this place and act out their deviant pleasures on those who can survive, then have them attack parishioners in their churches. It would bring scandal that the Church did not want nor need. So these measures were put in place by the Catholic Archdioceses.

I sat, silent, letting it all sink in. I had lost my appetite. Bishop wasn't lying when he said he would let the monks act out their sick fantasies on me. Now here I was, deep in the den of religious vampires to be used as their sexual toy and food source. I began shaking my head as reality sunk in.

“I don't think I can do that.” I heard myself say out loud.

“Excuse me? First, you always address me as, My Lady, do you understand. Secondly, you don't have a choice my dear boy. The plans the Countess originally had for you were much different than the fate that has been chosen for you now. Considering that you are the one who woke those who shouldn't be awoken, be thankful this is your punishment. I know the Elders had much, much worse planned for you. Your actions have angered the Coven to the core. Your ignorant actions brought down our beloved Coven of Cain and allowed The Coven of The Children Of Lilith to flourish. You were meant to be here many years ago after the grand ball Rhavan threw for you. That was always the deal when you were first taken from the Svartálfaheimr. To help us in our war. But Rhavan kept delaying and tried to renegotiate the contract with his mother the Countess Catherine O'Mannan. He was obsessed with you and wanted you to himself. He was ordered to bring you to the Abbey the following week. But you never made it and your old Master's whereabouts is unknown. We know you were the last with him. We have heard whispers you may have had something to do with it along with Kryimsson Giddeon. You best have the right answers when they ask. You will be tattooed with the mark of a Confessional later today. I will be training you in the ways of fulfilling the needs of the Confessors. Is this all understood?

“No. No it is not! I will not be one of these, what do you call them? Confessionals?”

“As I stated to you before, you do not have a choice in this matter. If you wish to continue to be disobedient I am more than willing to show you the errors of your ways Nicholas. Guard!” Before I could react, the door flung open and I was pulled off of the chair and down on the floor. He flipped me over and began hitting me with a scourge whip. I curled into the fetal position trying to deflect as much as I could.

“Are you willing to continue without dispute Nicholas?” she asked as the guard continued to whip me.

“YES! God please, stop!” I cried out.

“Yes what?”

“My Lady! Yes My Lady!”

She motioned for him to stop beating me and he walked back out, locking the door behind him. I stayed huddled in a ball at her feet.

“Kneel! Hands clasped behind your head, eyes to the floor. NOW!”

Without hesitation I did as I was instructed, keeping my eyes to the floor. My shoulder ached as I struggled to keep my hands clasped. My fingers felt like they were burning again. I winched a little as she patted my head like a good pet.

“Good boy. Now, I have some questions for you so I can get an idea of how much training is ahead of you. First of all, how knowledgeable are you about sex? Have you had relations with women?”

This line of questioning was extremely uncomfortable for me. I didn't want to answer her but I knew if I didn't, more beatings would come. Reluctantly I answered, “I've had some experience.”

“How many?”

“Several My Lady.” I said shyly.

“Did you enjoy their company?”

“Yes My Lady, for the most part.”

“That is hardly experience. How about men?”

“Yes. My Lady.” I had to force myself to answer.

“How many?”

I hesitated for a few moments, “Several.”

“Did you find that enjoyable?”

“No. my Lady. Not one bit.” I felt my face flush with shame.

“Please elaborate.”

“If you don't mind My lady, I wish not to speak of it.”

She sat silent for a few moments. I could feel her eyes looking me over. “I will not push you to confess to me your experience just yet, but at some point soon, you will have to tell me. I see I have my work cut out for me. Since you are practically a virgin you will need to be trained in all facets of sexual pleasure. You have no choice in having carnal relations with men. You will be trained in how to pleasure them in all ways, including oral. Training will also entail you learning how to administer discipline. Some confessors purge their sins through pain. I understand none of this seems very pleasant to you and I assure you, training will not be easy. If I have to resort to drastic measures in order for you to learn your place, so be it.”

I sat on my knees, dumbfounded. My face, expressionless. I tried my best to digest all that she said and was now expected of me. How long was I supposed to endure this before Sebastian’s plan came to fruition. She went to the door and opened it allowing Brother Uzel with his large book to enter.

“Stand up. Remove your dressing gown. I wish to see what I have to work with.”

Slowly, with great apprehension, I rose, removing my night shirt without a word. I just reacted. My hands instinctively went to my groin to try and give myself some sort of modesty in front of them both. Lady Char smiled slightly as she watched me turn bright red. She reached out and lightly slapped my hands forcing me to expose myself.

“Hands up behind your head, spread your legs wide. But first, show me your hands.” My hands had softened since I left life at sea. She seemed pleased by how they felt. Her thumb ran over the brand of my hand. “What is that mark on your hand?”

“It's a branding I received before being sent to prison.”

“When were you a prisoner and why?” The tall man asked sternly. Lady Char looked at it shocked.

“In 1730 I was sentenced to Marshalsea Prison in England for Piracy. I spent about ten years there before I was sent to the monastery in New Orleans.”

“How old are you exactly?” he asked shockingly.

“I was born in the year of our Lord 1670.”

“That would make you one hundred and fourteen years old! Amazing! You look no older than seventeen.” he said amazed, jotting it all down.

I placed my hands behind my neck as she stood up and touched my chest seeing how fit I was. Then felt my arms and legs to feel how strong they were. Opened my mouth, checking my teeth. Then ran her fingers over the many scars on my chest and back as she walked around me. I felt like I was back on the auction block in New Orleans. “While you are in training as a Confessional you will always present yourself to me in this manner unless told otherwise, is that understood Nicholas?”

“Understood My Lady.” I answer emotionlessly.

She reached down and took a firm hold of my cock. I slightly stumbled as she pulled me towards her with me still firmly in her warm gloved hand. She began stroking and fondling watching my reaction. It didn't take much, and a twinkle appeared in her eyes. My face flushed red again with embarrassment and shame. I did not like being this exposed. I felt so vulnerable. “Relax Nicholas. There is no need to feel shame or embarrassment. You are a very beautifully handsome creature. The many scars that cover your body make you even more attractive. It shows your story. Your struggles and torment. And what I hold in my hand is nothing to be ashamed of. You are a very well endowed young man. All things to be proud of. I promise, in time, you will look upon the work you do here as doing the Lords work. Think of how many innocents you protect by allowing the clergy to come here and work through their sins and sexual desires.”

Tears of shame filled my eyes. I tried hard to not show emotion. As a Svartálfar crying was looked at as a huge weakness. Showing emotion of any kind was pretty much prohibited, but to shed tears was the worst. It was always something Rhavan couldn't stand. How I kept my emotions close to my heart. He fed on emotions. Since awakening I had become too emotional for my tastes. I had very little control. Her hand caressing my cock stirred feelings I had not felt, longer than I could remember. “Ah, there we are, so you do feel something after all.” she said as she continued to play with me.

I could feel myself coming to climax soon. I looked up at her with fear. She smiled and stroked me until I came. My whole body shuddered as I let out a low moan of pent-up passion. My legs felt suddenly weak as I tried to compose myself. The tears were falling uncontrollably now. I made no sounds, no sobs wracked my chest. Just tears freely falling. It truly confused me. Lady Char removed the glove from her hand and placed it in a little basket near the door. Then she took a cloth and dipped it in cool water from the wash basin and wiped my groin and cock clean. All the while with me keeping in the same spread position. I felt so small and exposed before her. And I knew she could tell, no matter how hard I tried to compose myself. “The tears you shed of shame make you even more desirable. Yes, remember, always be humble. You may dress now. Please put on the white Templar robe that is hanging in the small wardrobe. That will be your daily wear until your training is complete. It also allows others here of your training status.”

I dropped my arms and wiped the tears from my face. I put on the robes and returned the standing position I was in before. Lady Char smiled and pointed to the floor. I knelt without question. This pleased her greatly. For some odd reason I wanted to please her. I felt no urge to cause any trouble. Taking my chin in her hand she brought my face up so my eyes met hers. Her eyes were a deep emerald green and she had long golden blonde hair that had the slightest curl. Her face was round with rosy cheeks. Her lips were thin with the slightest tinge of red. I found myself lost in her for the moment, forgetting the tall man in black was still in the room. She wiped the remaining tears that continued to fall with her handkerchief from my cheeks. “Your tears are free to fall in front of me. Never feel you must hide what you are feeling from me, ever. Part of surviving as a Confessional is that you understand your feelings, work to understand and control them. I understand you have very deep rooted concerns and fears. You will not be molested or abused by anyone here at the Abby. We do not work the way Cardinal Bishop runs his Order of monks at the monastery. I know of some of the abuse you have suffered at the hands of the males in your former life. I promise you that will not happen here. After Countess O'Mannan was assassinated we knew that we could not continue on in such a barbaric manner and still follow the word of God. We have put tremendous protocol in place in order to prevent such abuses. You will never be attacked, raped, brutalized or tortured by anyone who lives or visits this Abbey. What happened to you in the dungeon after your rigorous test session with the Mother Superior was not done by anyone here within these walls. We are actively looking to punish whomever did that to you. But at the same time, you must learn to accept and embrace your sexuality. Use it to empower you. You will be in control of all the situations you will be put in sexually. Even though you must receive punishment, you have the power to say 'stop' if you feel the Confessor has gone too far. There will also be guards nearby in case the Confessor does not respect your wishes to stop.”

I sat, absorbing all she said to me. I did feel a little bit better once she explained that I actually will have control over each Confession. Deep down I knew I was going to have to come to terms with what was going to be my new life for a while.

“Do you have any questions for me? You may speak freely.”

“Where am I exactly? I mean I get that this is an Abbey, but does it have a name?

“You are at the 'Abbey of Saint Francis' located near the Mississippi River outside New Orleans. While you were recovering there was a young servant named Simon, who attended to you. We felt he was best to help take care of you since you both seem close in age. I hope he is to your liking. If so he will be your personal servant.”

“Yes, thank you. He seems very kind.” It honestly took all I had to not show my joy that Sebastian and I could be friends and not have to endure this all in secret.

“Tomorrow your training begins. Oh, there is a bundle over on the table there that arrived with you in your coffin. I believe it was sent by the Elder Brother Leonardo. I am going to take my leave now and let you rest and absorb what I have told you. Rest well Nicholas and I will come and check on you later this evening.”

“Yes, My Lady, I would like that. Very much”. I responded shyly.

Lady Char left me in my gilded little cage. I sat back down on my bed and stared out the window for a short while. My back still stung from the whipping. Trying to focus on something else I let my mind drift as I watched the birds fly and clouds drift by in the sky. Perhaps it was all those years locked in a coffin, but I knew I just didn't have the fight in me anymore. This Abbey succeeded where all others had failed before, they had broken me. Just, completely broke me. In that moment I decided I would learn what I had to and use it all to my benefit. If this was to be my hell, at least I was gonna find joy in it and all the comforts that came along with it. Honestly, the way Lady Char made me feel, I wanted more. To be touched, loved, wanted and honored were so foreign to me. But I knew I wanted more. There was a lot that I was very unsure about but I would ask those questions in time. Letting my eyes explore my new room, I noticed the little wrapped bundle still sitting on the small table. Did I really want to open it? Out of sudden frustration I went over and unwrapped it. Inside were my writings on Sin-Eating, my bible, some drawing I made of garden designs, and a leather bound journal which was not mine. When I opened it a small note fell to the floor. It was in Leo's handwriting.

“My Dearest Nicholas,

My heart breaks for you. I have prayed every day for forgiveness for not protecting you from Cardinal Bishop. I should have acted. I should have done so much, but stood and did nothing out of fear. Even my deep love for you could not move my mind and body to act. Brother Sebastian and I have been in contact for many years since you Sired him and have kept him abreast of your imprisonment and the plans of moving you to the Abbey. Do not fear Mother Superior and the Abbey as Bishop had tried to instill in you. They do not work in nefarious ways. With Mother Superior leading the Coven much has changed. Being a Confessional will challenge your inner strength. But I know you are strong enough to endure. This is your calling for now to help others. I have sent along your books, your personal bible and a journal. A small gift. A place where you can write your innermost feelings, thoughts, and fears. It is always best to get it out of your mind, so it doesn't fester and cause more stress in an already very stressful situation. I hope someday I can make up to you my lovely Nicholas, my failings, when you needed me most. Please pray for me as I will pray for you.

Sincerely,

Br. Leonardo O'Mannan”

I stared at the note for all of a minute and tossed the books aside. At the time I wanted nothing to do with anyone or anything from the monastery. Anger began to swell in me as I thought of all the time I was trapped, locked away in that coffin. Leo's words meant nothing to me. No, I would not forgive him. Or any other of those damned creatures that inhabited that place. It all came rushing back like it was yesterday. I paced my small room for what felt like forever until I felt myself calm.

A Heart to Heart

Later that same day Sebastian came to check on me. When he walked in I jumped up from my desk and hugged him. I almost knocked the tray out of his hands. I was very happy to see him. “Did you hear?” I asked excitedly.

“Wait? What? What are you so excited about?” he chuckled as he sat the tray down on the table.

“We don't have to pretend to not know each other. We can be friends! Lady Char said that you are to continue on as my.” I stopped suddenly because I couldn't bring myself to call him my servant. He was my friend, not my slave.

“Yes, Nicholas, I know. And I too am very happy as well. And please, do not feel shame about me being your servant. I owe you my life! You are my Sire. The least I can do is bring you meals and make sure you are healthy and as happy as you can be under the current circumstances.” he said and hugged me tight.

“Thank you my friend.” I said as I hugged him back.

We sat down and chatted a little about this or that, I don't quite remember. But I do remember I kept staring at him. He looked about eighteen. He would have been about twenty in human years when I Sired him. But that was many years ago. For me though, it all felt like last week. My mind began to get lost in the amount of time I had missed while locked away. As we ate, I guess he could tell something was bothering me.

“What troubles you Nicholas?”

“Time, Sebastian. So much time has passed. How long was I locked away?”

“It was close to thirty years.” he answered sadly.

“Is it odd that it all feels like yesterday. All of it is still fresh in my mind. My anger at Bishop still rages. Leo wrote a letter begging forgiveness. I can not forgive that they all stood by and did nothing. Leo most of all. I don't know if I ever will. And then I think of all the time lost.” I shook my head in dismay.

“Nicolas, can I ask you a question?”

“Anything!”

“Why do you not hold anger towards me? I did nothing to stop him. I knew the moment he grabbed you it was not going to end well for you. But, I still greatly feared him. I sobbed as I heard him brutalize you. I have carried so much guilt over it all these years about that night ” tears fell from his eyes.

I got up and hugged him. “Sebastian, look at me. I never held any anger towards you because we were both in the same boat with Bishop. He is a monster who terrorized us both. You were just a helpless child. What were you going to do? Now, I have a question for you. Why did you have me Sire you? After all you saw growing up around them, why at that point did you want to be one?”

“I chose you because you are not like the rest of them. You see your curse as a part of you. Not just what you are. You never once tried to feed from me, rape or harm me in any way. We were real friends, true brothers. I know Leo was planning to turn me at some point. But I did not want to be like him. I wanted to be like you. When I woke you to embrace me, I had lived under constant lock and key for eight years. It was maddening. All I could do was go to morning prayer. I was fed in my room and was not allowed any contact with the others. They wouldn’t even let me tend to the gardens. They left them to overgrow and rot away. Doing all they could to try and erase any memory of you. Just Leo and Bishop would come see me. I had to get out. I knew you would do that for me. For you loved me.”

I sat looking at him a bit dumbfounded. But deep down, I understood. Anything was better than existing at the monastery. He was right, I did love him, like a dear brother. He was my best friend and confidant. I would lay my life down for him as I knew he would for me. Sebastian was the only person I knew at that time in my life I could truly count on. We sat and finished our meal in content silence.

The Devil Comes to Confession

As I mentioned earlier one rule that is strictly adhered to is that a Confessional never knows ahead of time who their clients are. Just only when one is scheduled. But there was something drastically different about this one. It didn't feel right. Not like the others. I sensed it before I even left my room. I should have gone with my gut. First, this particular confession was not being done in the usual room. I was being brought to someone's personal chambers. It had to be someone who was of high rank either in the church or the coven. I entered the dimly lit room and removed my robes, placing them on a chair close to the door. I laid down on the floor, face down, arms spread. I heard footsteps coming towards me. I felt a tap on my head.

“ Here.” they said pointing to the floor in front of them.

“Kiss my feet.” I hesitated for a moment but did as requested. I had never been requested that for anyone but Lady Char since my training. Something felt extremely off about this.

“Get up onto your knees.” Something pulled at my mind and I found myself kneeling in front of this person. A hand reached down and gently caressed my face. A person in a long red velvet robe with a hood and a wrap that covered their face.

“I wish to watch you bathe before we begin my Confession.”

“As you wish your Grace.” I bowed and was suddenly roughly grabbed by the scruff of the neck. He brought me to the washtub and watched me clean myself. I felt even dirtier having this person there staring at me like a fiend. When I was done he instructed me to go to the huge bed. Before I sat on it he grabbed me by the hair forcing me to my knees once again. I looked up at him with a little bit of anger in my eyes. He laughed and slapped me hard across the face. I was not about to take this abuse. And as a Confessional I had the right to refuse this treatment. Instinct forced me to my feet to confront him and was instantly thrown back onto the bed. “I know it is against the Confessional protocol, but are you still a fighter, precious Nicholas. I hope you are. You know how much I've always loved a fighter.” he laughed. Suddenly I recognized the voice. Bishop! It was forbidden for us to fight back. I prayed the guards were still outside the door.

“I refuse to take your confession. You are forbidden to treat me in this barbaric manner! I am taking my leave from here now. Guards!” I called out. No one came in. I yelled for the guards a few more times. Bishop would not let me off the bed. Anger began to swell inside me as I felt like a trapped animal. He knew it too. He could sense it in me. Then and there I knew then I was done for. There was nothing I could do to stop this session. He winked at me and smiled hungrily, licking his fangs. I could see he had aged a lot since I was sent away from the monastery. I was not about to be his meal. I hopped up off the bed, “You want a fight do you? Well you got one pansy.” and charged at him. I was able to get in a few good shots, making his lip and nose bleed. The night in the chapel flashed through my mind. I was not going down this time without a fight. I was much stronger now and could more than protect myself. Licking the blood from his lips he smiled and waved his hand. A strange cloud enveloped me, paralyzing me and all went dark.

Next thing I knew I was on the bed and he was pouring some sweet liquid down my throat. Swallow or choke, I swallowed and tried to shake off the cloudiness in my mind and started to struggle to not let what was about to happen, happen. He pinned me down with his body weight and sunk his fangs deep into my throat. I fought hard to not let him win, but the fight didn't last long. I was drained to near unconsciousness and he proceeded to sodomize me for the rest of the night.

My body ached when I awoke. I felt groggy and in a fog. Almost like a bad hangover. I tried to get out of bed but was chained by the ankle to the bedpost. Why had the guard not come and gathered me yet? Confessions never last more than an hour. Bishop must have bribed him. Fucking Bishop! Rage began to swell inside me. He chuckled as he awoke to see me struggling with the chain.

“What are you laughing at pervert?” Anger continued to grow within me.

“A beautiful toy that is all mine for the next few days.” He laughed at me and caressed my cheek.

“You know you are going to pay dearly for what you are doing to me. The Mother Superior will have your head for attacking and kidnapping a Confessional!” I slapped his hand away.

“I don't think you will be in any condition to tell anyone anything when I get done with you.”

“I have survived much worse than the likes of you.”

Angered by what I was saying he grabbed me tight by the throat and squeezed slowly as he spoke. “Oh, I know all too well my sweet, sweet, angry boy. I had you once before when you were Rhavan's fledgling. I believe Kryimsson was present for that wondrous event as well. When I took you in the chapel, that too was a joyous night. The Church will not protect you from those of us who will take revenge on the one who took our beloved Rhavan. I know you killed him. You reek of guilt. There are several of his fledgling you and Kryimsson failed to kill during your murderous rampage who have made written sworn statements. You are not under the protection of any Coven once you kill ones maker and none will take one who has murdered his very own Sire, such as yourself.”

“Blasphemy! You can't prove jack shit!” I said, calling his bluff. I was pretty confident we left none alive the night of the ball other than the one who brought Bishop the journals. The memory of that night flooded back. My hand shot out and grabbed Bishop by the neck and dug my nails in deep as I could. Rage overtook me and with all my strength I tried to rip out his throat. I cursed him in Svartálfar and began speaking a spell that would teleport me out of there. Just as I was speaking the last verse, Bishop hit me in the head with his cane. It knocked me silly, breaking my casting. Forcing me once again to drink more of the sweet liquid, he unshackled me from the bed and bound and gagged me. I struggled hard and tried to yell out for help but no one came. Why had the guards not come to check on me? Where was Sebastian? Where was my love Pierre? Surely he must be worried by now.

Bishop proceeded to beat and rape me over the next two days or so. I wasn't really sure. Time really didn't exist anymore. I felt sick and high when I wasn't being used by him. I was tormented as Bishop allowed some of the servants, clergy and guards of the Abbey to use and feed from me for a price. Taking great pleasure in watching each have their way with me. He was the Cardinal after all. Second in command of the Coven. Who would question him. They all feared him greatly, even more than they feared Mother Superior. I was lost in a living nightmare. My world became a blur. At some point, when I'm not sure, I found myself in a strange bed with two very beautiful vampires who were feeding from me. A euphoric feeling surrounded me like a warm blanket. I didn't stop them, it felt too good compared to what I had just gone through at the hands of Bishop. I don't know how long I had been there nor did I care. I think somewhere in my mind I had convinced it was all a dream and I was still chained in Bishop's room. Someone would come for me. I kept praying. Someone please find me and wake me from this hell.

For the Truth Shall Set You Free

When Mother Superior arrived home from her trip to visit coven members in New York, she was informed that I had run away shortly after she had left. Bishop told her that I had run to the local vampire opium den and refused to leave.

“I tried my very best to bring him home. You know how strong-willed the boy is my Mistress.” He said to her. Mother Superior found his answer a bit strange, along with his presence at the Abbey during her absence. Something in the back of her subconscious knew it all felt off. I had been there all this time and never caused any issues, then suddenly in her absence I would run? She thought not. She became enraged none the less. Mother Superior had been meeting with the New York Archdiocese and having to cut that visit short put the Abbey in question. They were concerned that perhaps her way of running the Abbey in New Orleans was a bit too radical. Last thing she needed them hearing was that the Confessionals were running away. Lady Char had written her that something was wrong and she comes to find out it's due to my running away. She stormed out of the Abbey with a few guards in tow to collect me.

I felt someone shaking and yelling at me. Then a hard slap across the face jolted me awake. There above me was a very, very angry Mother Superior. “I come back from business early because Lady Char thinks you are in trouble and I find you here! How dare you!” She screamed at me as she slapped me again over and over splitting my lip and grabbed me up by the back of the hair.

I scrambled to my feet as she dragged me out of the bed. I desperately tried to figure out where I was. The room was filled with a smoky haze and a familiar smell filled my nostrils. It was opium. My heart stopped as the realization of where I was hit hard. I was in a den. It wasn't a dream. How did I end up there? I couldn't remember. “Oh, Gods, no, your Grace. This isn't what you think I swear, please.” I begged.

She placed her finger to her lips signaling for me to be quiet. Fearful of angering her more I complied. She dragged me out of the establishment still grasping me by the hair. My legs shook uncontrollable beneath me as I knew what was in store. I searched my mind desperately to remember how I got to the opium den. I was so high I couldn't tell what was happening. Moments of clarity would come and go. She dragged me back to the Abbey and straight down to the dungeon. There, she ordered me to strip down. “Get out of those disgusting clothes now! Your reek of opium and sex!”

I stripped down as I was ordered. Mother Superior then picked up a bucket of water that was nearby and threw it at me. It shocked me sober for a few seconds. She then grabbed me by the hair and dragged me to the shackles hanging from the rafters. I shivered uncontrollably, praying I survived the beating I was about to receive. As she was searching for a switch to use Lady Char came running in.

“Mother Superior, what's wrong with him? What did he do?”

“I found the little vile sinner at Victor's opium den! He apparently ran there after I had left.”

“I don't believe that. He wouldn't. Last anyone saw of him, he was performing a Confession.”

“He wouldn't what Lady Char? I dragged him out of there myself. Look at him! He's absolutely out of it from the opium. I cut my business short because you thought he was in trouble and he was in a den!” She stormed over to start the beating, Lady Char stepped in front of her.

“Look, your Grace, I don't understand why he was there, but there is something very wrong here.”

“What is wrong is he is serving to be more trouble than expected. He needs to learn we will not tolerate our Confessionals to act in such degenerate ways!”

Lady Char looked at me lost. I was so out of it that I had no clue what was happening. She kept trying to talk to me but I wouldn't answer her. I just shook my head “no”. Mother Superior pushed her out of the way and swung the switch at my chest. The first lash hit me. I didn't flinch. I tried to eat the pain. She continued to hit me but I refused to cry out.

“Insolent child! I will break you! You will tell me why you ran!” she screamed. Storming over to the wall she grabbed a snake whip and approached me with a wicked smile. Bishop had come down to watch the fun and to make sure I didn't tell them what really happened.

“So, you think you can fight this. I bet I will get a reaction out of you now.”

My eyes grew wide with fear. I couldn't find my voice to even beg for her not to hit me. She laughed at the look in my eyes and walked behind me. I readied myself the best I could, but nothing came.

“Your Grace?” Lady Char asked her worried. She had frozen in her steps and stared at my back.

“Brother Nicholas, why did you run away?” Her tone changed suddenly from anger to great concern. Stepping back in front of me she took my face in her hand. I tried not to look her in the eyes. I felt so ashamed for not protecting myself better. If I looked at her or Lady Char in the eyes I knew I couldn't lie to them. Lady Char stepped behind me and gasped at what she saw. My back was covered in whip lashes and deep bite marks.

“Brother Nicholas, please you have to look at me. I need to know what happened to you.” Lady Char begged. “Who did this to you.” I struggled not to say anything. “Speak to us!” She yelled at me. I just stared back blankly. I was not going to talk. Especially with Bishop standing right there.

“Everything you have been told is true, your Grace. I ran away. I am ready to take my beating now.” I said in a whispered shaky voice. Angered at my defiance and the fact of not knowing the truth of what had happened to me, Mother Superior beat me within an inch of my life. To this day it was one of the worst I've ever taken. I think she believed she could beat the truth from me. But I was more strong willed than she took me for. I didn't make a sound or shed a tear. I just stared at Bishop plotting my revenge. A few grunts of pain began to escape me before I passed out. Lady Char had also noticed this and grabbed Bishop by the arm. “Why was he staring you down like that? You had something to do with this didn't you! I know he didn't run away. And I know you were his last Confession. I will find out what happened sooner or later. Start praying to whatever God you believe in. Because if you are involved in any way, your days are running short.” She growled. Lady Char unshackled me and had me brought me back to my room where Sebastian cleaned and dressed my wounds.

Sebastian was pacing the room when they brought me back. He grabbed me tightly with tears in his eyes. “Where were you all these days? I tried to contact you but there was something blocking me. What happened to you Nicholas? Why won't you talk to me? Why have you shut me out?” I heard him ask while he fussed over me. “This was Bishop’s doing? wasn’t it? You have the same look of tortured despair that you did back at the monastery. Please Sire, let me in. Let me help you. If it was Bishop, you must tell the truth.” He begged.

Crawling into my bed I roll over onto my side with my back to him. I couldn't look at him or tell him the truth. It would bring the coven down to its knees, literally. Although I would have loved nothing more than to see it all fall, I had come to care for Lady Char and even Mother Superior. My life there was much better than my previous living arrangements in the past. I had begun to settle into my routines, and really had no need to run. And in one fell swoop, Bishop took it all away. The powers that be failed in protecting me from him. My faith and trust had been shaken to its core.

Over the next week I was forbidden from leaving my room and denied blood. I was not allowed to take confessions or talk to anyone. Not even to see Pierre. If at any time in my life I needed his comfort, it was now. When Sebastian would come in and open the curtains in my room I would grunt at him to keep them closed. Since Bishop fed me large amounts of opium while with him I went through horrible withdrawal. My body ached for days. I was nauseous, had cold sweats, and couldn’t keep my food down. I had fallen into such despair I couldn't find my way out. Mother Superior and Lady Char lied. They said nothing would happen to me here, that I would be protected. But even they couldn’t stop that monster from attacking and kidnapping me. Feeling deep in my heart this cycle with Bishop was never going to end, I decided that when I was strong enough, I was going to pack a small bag with my belongings and head for the first ship out of New Orleans. I was never going back. As usual though, nothing ever goes to plan. I got as far as stepping onto a ship before Lady Char had someone track me down before I was able to leave port. She actually reported me as a runaway indentured servant. I was arrested and put in the jail and held there until Mother Superior came to collect me. I was furious at being reported as a runaway slave. They were going to either beat the shit out of me or force me to tell them the truth. At the time I would have rather had the beatings. I was released to Mother Superior without punishment from the court. Too many of the officials frequented our Abbey for services. When we arrived back at the Abbey she escorted me straight to the secret room behind the meeting room wall. I feared this was going to be worse than our last encounter. She sat me down in a chair and forced me to drink a potion. I looked at her with both fear and anger in my eyes as I voluntarily swallowed it down.

“Enough of this silence child. I am going to get to the bottom of this issue we have been having since I got back from my trip to New York. How did you end up at Victor's?”

I fought hard not to answer but the serum was taking it’s hold and I heard the words leave my mouth anyway. “I don't remember. I.... I..... Oh, Please God give me strength! For the truth shall set you free.” I cried, dropped to my knees, and kissed her feet. She pulled me up and took my face in her hands. “Look at me dear child. Look into my eyes. Tell me the truth. I will be able to tell if you are lying to me. But I feel there will only be truth in your confession.”

“It was Bishop. It was all Bishops doing. He paid the guards to stay away from the room. He let servants and guards of the Abbey take me for a fee. He placed me in that den of sin where you found me. He said none would believe me. Knowing his station and what he had done to me in the past at the monastery I didn't trust any would believe me. He is the one who brutalized me in the dungeon after your interrogation session when I first arrived. He said none would believe me. I feared he was right, so I said nothing, your Grace. Please, please forgive me. Please don't send me away. Please don't seal me away in the crypts. I beg you please believe me!” I was near hysterics.

Mother Superior did something next I never saw coming, she hugged me. She held me tightly as a Mother would a crying child and I clung to her like one. It shocked me, but not enough to stop my sobbing. After a few minutes I was able to finally compose myself and she went back to sitting in her chair. She was deep in contemplation. “What happened to you at the monastery Brother Nicholas. I wish you to be frank with me. Do you understand?”

Nodding I understood, I composed myself further and sat back in the chair across from her. I was terrified to confide in her what Bishop had done to me all those years ago but here I was spilling it all. “Soon after my arrival to the monastery, Cardinal Bishop began feeding from me. Flesh to flesh. Then came the nightly visits for intercourse. I told none of what was happening. He said none would believe. This went on for over twelve years. Then the night came where he took me by force in the chapel of the monastery. All heard and knew what was happening, but none came to my aid. They all cowered in their little rooms as he continued to rape me over the course of three nights, until I finally snapped. That is when I decided I would wake those who shouldn't be woken. I did not think of the ramifications of those actions. All I cared about was getting back at Cardinal Bishop. I am sorry for the harm I brought to the Coven of Cain.”

Anger was evident in Mother Superiors eyes although her demeanor did not show it. What Bishop had done to me was highly and strictly forbidden. The punishment is castration, imprisonment in the tombs, expulsion from the coven, or death. He used his power and station to torture me. “Are there any who may be willing to corroborate this accusation you levy against Cardinal Bishop from back at your time at the monastery?”

“Yes, Brother Leo. I believe he will speak on my behalf.”

Shock and anger now clearly showed on her face. “I will send for Brother Leo to meet at once. You will write your statement as you have just told me. The ones who defiled you while in my absence, the guards and servants who paid to take you, their names as well.” She placed the inkwell, pen and paper before me on the desk. Without hesitation I wrote the names of those I knew. Even the guard who left me. The ones I did not, I was sure would come out while Mother Superior interrogated them. Once I finished I handed her the statement. “Mother Superior, may I ask a request of you?”

“Yes Nicholas, what is it?”

“May I go back to taking confession? I find it helps me greatly at times of great stress. To work through my frustrations and purge my anger. I wish not to let this animosity I hold inside eat away at me. It’s hard enough walking past those who took liberties with me and not be able to react the way I wish too. I respect you too much to shed blood in the house of our God.”

“I fully understand your request, but i can not allow it. The reasons being firstly, your mind, body and soul have gone through a tremendous trauma. You need time to heal. Secondly, I wish not to give anyone any further cause to come after you until this matter with Cardinal Bishop is resolved. I know you understand my reasoning. Now, go back to your room and relax. You will not be receiving any confessions until further notice.”

Pierre was waiting for me when I got back. As soon as I entered he took me tightly in his arms and sobbed. I had never seen him shed a tear before. We embraced tightly never wanting to let go of each other. “Oh, mon amour, my beloved Nicholas, I thought I had lost you forever. I was so afraid when you disappeared. I knew something was wrong straight away when you never returned from the confession. I tried to tell the guards, but none would go look for you. What happened to you my love? Your eyes show so much sorrow and torture. I have never seen you like this. Not even when you first arrived here. Please beloved, talk to me.”

I broke down completely in his arms. I sobbed until I couldn’t breathe, my chest hurt and tightened. My palms became sweaty. I told him what had happened to me at Bishop’s hands between tears. That he was the confession I was to take before my disappearance. I told him all that was done to me. I told him all of what my life at the monastery was like under Bishop’s rule. I told him the truth about ‘Simon’ and our true relationship. It was a huge risk telling Pierre, but I didn’t want to keep any more secrets from him. I loved him. Truly and deeply loved him. I knew it right then and there more then than any other time. “Please don’t hate me for keeping secrets from you and trying to run away. I was desperate and did the only thing I knew best, running. I love you Pierre. I love you more than any creature on God’s green earth. I promise I will never leave you of my own free will. My heart and soul I dedicate to you my dearest Pierre.

He held me, rocking me in his arms. “Please calm my love. All is well. I promise never to speak of your real relationship with Simon. That is as sacred as the union Lady Char and I have. I believe you when you say you will never leave me. I can feel your sincerity. I hear it in your lovely voice. I forgive you for running mon amour. Although I can never fully grasp all that that horrid man has done to you, I believe that you felt it was your only recourse to run. Let me help you heal from the trauma. Talk to me if you have nightmares, or need to work things out in your mind. I am always here for you mon amour, together forever you and I my precious love.”

Lying silently in bed together I drifted off to sleep that night in his arms, safe from the world. No nightmares plagued my slumber. No dark menacing shadows watching me from the corners of the room. My protector was with me. My Pierre, my love, my beloved. Emotionally I felt as if the weight of the world had lifted.

Fall from Grace

It has been several days since my confession to Mother Superior. Sebastian, Pierre and I were playing cards, as we did at times when I was not working. A knock at the door came, Pierre got up and answered. Her personal guard brought a message that I dress in my finest vestments and report to her at once. This made me very nervous. I didn't notice how badly I was shaking until Sebastian got up to help me button my vest. “Do you want me to come with you?” His offer was genuine. But I could not put him in that kind of danger. No one here knew his true identity other than Pierre and I planned to keep it that way. “Thank you my dear brother, but no. I can do this alone. But I will ask something else of you. May I feed from you before I go? My gut is telling me I may need the extra boost.” Without hesitation he cut his wrist and let the blood pour into a small glass on the table. I drank it quickly. I Finished dressing, kissed Pierre, hugged Sebastian and went to see why I had been summoned.

Mother Superior’s personal guard brought me into the large room. I saw Bishop right away. I froze. I absolutely could not move. The guard nudged me gently to move me further into the room, but I couldn't budge. Bishop's eyes were locked on mine. “You will say nothing.” A voice said in my head. It was him! Bishop was in my mind! How is he doing it? Panic pinged in my chest as the guard gave me a comforting squeeze on the shoulder. I swallowed hard and took a step forward. Mother Superior took my hand and led me to a chair nearby. I felt like I was in a fog. My body began to feel warm, my face began to flush. It was Sebastian’s blood fighting against Bishop's magic. Or so I thought at the time. I was wise to drink from him before I entered the room.

“Please, sit here.” She said concerned.

“May I have a drink please. I feel faint.” I whispered. She snapped her fingers and a servant brought me a small glass of brandy. I drank it quickly and gathered my wits and inner strength. Something inside me knew we were up for a challenge. I trusted my instinct. Feeling a little better I began looking a bit more around the room. Brother Leo was there along with the guard who abandoned me, and several of those who had paid to use me for Bishop's pleasure. “You will say NOTHING!” The voice tried to command me again. An inner strength began to rise, but I didn't show it. I continued to play scared.

“Are you feeling better now Nicholas?” Mother Superior asked, placing her hand on mine.

“Yes. Thank you Mother Superior. Much better.” I answered in a shaky voice. “What is your wish, your Grace?”

“Please rise and read aloud the statement you put in writing. Then, I wish for you to point to those who have defiled you while in my absence.”

I looked at her terrified, then over at Bishop who once again spoke to me in my mind. “You will say nothing. Nothing! Or I will take your life.” Ignoring him, shyly I looked around the room to see twelve elder vampires sitting silently, observing. I knew them to be the council of the Coven of Cain, but had never actually seen them before. I then looked over at Brother Leo, who stood stoic and silent as always. But something seemed odd. He was staring off into space. Clearing the lump in my throat, I did as I was told and rose slowly. Nervously reading the paper before me, one by one I pointed them all out, leaving Bishop for last.

“Blasphemy! All of this is absurd blasphemy.” Bishop huffed.

Looking at Brother Leo, Mother Superior asked, “Is it as young Nicholas says Brother Leo? Did Cardinal Bishop abuse his power at the monastery? Did he rape this child? Did he feed flesh to flesh? Is it true you did nothing to interfere?” He only looked back at her blankly. No answer came. I couldn't believe he stood silent. After begging me for forgiveness, now he stood silent. Anger swelled inside me. Using my new found gifts I was able to detect a ward on him. It had to be Bishops doing. I was going to have to find a way on my own to convince these vampires I was telling the truth.

“The boy is lying. Why wouldn't he? He is the one who woke Maeve Draco O'Mannan and Demitri Faust! He is a devil born of Fallen Angels!” Bishop snapped at them. “To believe anything he says against me would be heresy.”

The council began whispering to each other in a language I had never heard before. Looking over at Mother Superior I could tell that favor was swaying in Bishops direction. An idea sprung to mind! I dropped to my knees and began to focus on the energy in my body. I began to feel warm, like someone placed a blanket over me. Rocking back and forth I began to recite scripture of truth and honor, working myself into a frenzy. Begging them to believe me. “I only woke those who shouldn't be woken out of anger towards Cardinal Bishop. My young immature mind did not think of the consequences. I meant no direct harm towards the Coven of Cain. I had to find a way to make the nightmare at his hands end.” And buried my head in my hands.

One of the elders instructed Mother Superior to place me on my knees before them. As she grabbed me up with the help of her personal guard, they both stopped dead in their tracks when they looked at me. She let go and placed her hands to her mouth in utter shock and awe. I raised my head and all could see the marks of a crown of thorns in blood across my forehead. Putting my hands out as if begging for help, the stigmata clearly on my palms. Tears of blood streamed from my eyes. A collective gasp echoed in the room. I crawled across the floor and grabbed onto Brother Leo's robes.

“Help me dear Brother Leo! What is happening to me? Why do I bleed as Christ did? I must be telling the truth, mustn't I? Please Brother Leo, I forgive you. I forgive you! I forgive you!” I cried out to the heavens, praying all believed my little theatrical display. He shook his head as if coming out of a fog. Something I either said or did broke Bishops hold. He dropped to his knees and grabbed me up in his arms. “Nicholas, oh, how I have failed you. I did not protect you when I should have. I feared Cardinal Bishop. But I will no longer sit back silent and allow his atrocities to continue. Yes, Mother Superior, everything young Nicholas has said and accused Cardinal Bishop of is true.” He cried as he hugged me.

“Tricks of the devil! I can not believe you are all falling for this display! They are both just conspiring against me.”

“What reasons would Nicholas have to lash out against you if it were not for you tormenting him? He was obedient, compliant to the ways of the monastery. He was an asset to us as a Sin-eater. But your lust for his body and blood made you blind with ambition. And what reasons would I ever conspire against you? I have been nothing but obedient and loyal, covering up all of your wrongdoings and evil deplorable acts you have done over centuries. No Bishop, my dear uncle, your time is done. No more. You will no longer harm him or anyone else.”

Enraged Bishop slapped Brother Leo as hard as he could. Without a moment's hesitation I sprung at him. Knocking into Bishop as hard as I could, throwing him across the floor towards the seated elders. Fire was in my eyes, I was allowing whatever was inside me to take over. In a single leap I landed over him, pinning him to the floor. Staring him down like a hungry beast I growled, “No more will you harm me you deviant monster. They all know I told the truth. You raped me in the chapel all those years ago. You kept me weak so you could feed from me. You so desperately wanted to control me, but that was never going to happen Bishop. Never. The truth has set me free. Don't you see the stigmata? Christ would not bless me in such a way if I was a blasphemer or a demon.” I smeared the blood from my hand all over his face. Brother Leo took hold of the collar of my robe giving a slight tug. His way of telling me Bishop had had enough. I got up and sat back on my knees in front of the council. Tears still rolling down my cheeks. “I plead to you Elders and wise ones of the Coven of Cain, hear me.” A gentle hand rested on my shoulder. It was Leo.

“I have had enough of this display. Either give me your ruling or I am leaving. I have much I need to attend to back at the monastery. What say you all?” He demanded as he wiped the blood from his face. I could sense in him no fear or worry. He was very confident that they would not find him guilty. Because who was going to believe a lowly dark elf. A mere child in his eyes. A sex slave. The elders were back whispering among themselves for some time. I had composed myself by the time they were set to make their ruling. One of the Elders motioned for Mother Superior to approach. She listened very attentively, nodding often she understood all they were saying to her. Motioning for her attendant, she whispered something to him and he left the room in haste.

Turning to us she spoke, “The Elders have made their judgment. They believe what they have witnessed before them was a true sign of stigmata and that the young Confessional has spoken the truth. That God himself blessed him and that Bishop shall from ever more from this day, be banished from the Coven of Cain for his continuous acts of debauchery, rule breaking and gross abuse of his power and station. You Bishop will be castrated and placed in eternal slumber within the tombs until the end of days.”

Bishop looked at all of us in disguised shock. The door swung open and six guards came in and grabbed him before he could react. Mother Superior slit his throat and both wrists quickly to weaken him so he could not use his vampiric gifts. He was stripped of his robes the way he stripped me of mine before I was placed in the coffin all those years ago. The joy I took in seeing the panic in his eyes and all he loved being stripped from him in just mere moments was more than I could have ever imagined it would be. I hid it well though, still silently crying. Brother Leo continued to comfort me.

“As for you Brother Leo, I am sorry you had to endure so much in the shadow of that vile maniac. I am grateful for you in telling the truth. The council of elders have elected you to be my second in command and wish for you to take over the monastery and the Order of Cain. Do you accept this new station within the coven my nephew?”

“Oh yes! Thank you Mother Superior. You have my undying loyalty and worship.” He responded happily shocked.

“How are you my dearest? I know this has all been very trying for you. Is there anything I can do to help you?” She said comfortingly, wiping the tears from my face. I only asked to go back to my room. She smiled and had her personal guard escort me back. Before I left I knelt before the elders and thanked them in believing in me and that they had my undying loyalty. I glanced at Bishop who stood naked, frail and full of seething rage. Our eyes connected one last time. I winked at him as I walked out. He could be heard through the hallways screaming and yelling as he cursed my name. I laughed all the way back to my room. Sebastian and Pierre were still waiting for me when I arrived.

“What happened? Why are you covered in blood? Your face! Your hands! Why is Cardinal Bishop carrying on like that? The whole Abbey can hear him I'm sure.” Pierre asked, panicked. I told them all that had happened and how I had materialized the stigmata. We all had a good belly laugh at Bishop's expense and shared a nice bottle of wine to celebrate victory over ridding the coven of a vile monster.

Rouge Attacks

It had been a long day of confessions. Feeling drained, I needed to take a walk around the Abbey to clear my thoughts. Pierre was heavily on my mind. After the inquisition of Bishop and talk of my stigmata it made me greatly sought out for confessions. Which left little time for him and I to have time together. I was trying to plan a little trip away for us. Somewhere away from the Abbey. Perhaps while there I would ask him to be my “mate”. While I strolled I listened to the quiet sounds of the wind and leaves rustling. The cicadas loudly singing their song. The air was heavy and muggy very much like any early fall night in the South. In the distance I could hear the choir singing the evening hymns. As I rounded the corner to walk the garden I found myself surrounded by a dozen renegade vampires. I readied myself for a fight. Looking towards the Abbey I wanted to shout out for help but it was full of parishioners human and vampire alike for evening Mass. I couldn't call attention to what was about to go down. I was glad it was dark out. I had no physical weapons to protect myself with. It was time to test my unmuted magickal abilities and unleash all my frustration and anger upon these wretched vermin. Gathering the energy I had I focused as they came at me. Raising my hand I unleashed an energy blast tearing the poor soul apart. His blood splattered all over me as I focused again on each one coming at me. One by one I took them down until I was overtaken. One of the house servants just happened to see the commotion from a window in the garden below and alerted the guards. Sebastian had also sensed something was up and was at my side within a matter of minutes. Pulling them off me, we were able to stand our ground together. Another twenty or so vampires in monk robes appeared and began pushing towards the Abbey. We were able to block their way in but it was becoming a bit more than we could handle. Two made it past me and as I tried to stop them from entering, I was swarmed again and something sharp hit my neck. My legs gave out from under me and my arms went numb. I couldn't move. I hit the ground hard. Sebastian transformed into a wolf and ran after them along with a few of the guards. The vampires who attacked me continued to feed and beat me until I struggled no more. I heard screams in the distance as a dark fog took over. The smell of smoke became thick in the air. It was pouring from the doorway I was blocking. Again, sharp pain poked my neck. Something or someone was dragging me. I still couldn't move. Shaking the fog from my brain, I saw a cloaked figure who had a grip on my ankle. It took a few minutes, but I was eventually able to recover my senses enough to sluggishly kick out of it's grasp. It turned and as it came at me Sebastian came up from behind, knocking it to the ground. The hood fell back and it was Bishop! His face already turning young. Smart move on his part to drink from me to incapacitate me. It seemed the group of monk vampires were here to free their master. Bishop turned and hissed at us then fled out of the courtyard garden. I laid there exhausted, staring at the stars above. It was a crystal clear night. The smell of blood thick on my robes. Sebastian knelt down and helped me sit up. “Are you alright?”

“Physically yes, although I can’t seem to move much at the moment. This is not good Sebastian. Not good at all. With him free, none of us are safe.” I was angry. Every single time I feel I can finally breathe and enjoy the life I was given, someone always comes and fucks it up. Rhavan couldn’t just let me be at House Acnar or at sea with the crew of the Mary Jane. And now history is repeating itself with Bishop. Sebastian and a servant helped carry me back to my room. By this time the small fire had been extinguished and Mother Superior had been alerted of Bishop's escape. She ordered the house physician to tend to me and went to make arrangements to contact the elders on what had just occurred. I wasn't in bad shape, just weak from loss of blood and banged up a bit. The physician told me that the reason I couldn't really move is that someone must have severed the nerves in my neck when I was stabbed. Once alone, Sebastian’s fed me and I was well within a matter of hours. It bothered me greatly how easily Bishop's fledglings were able to take me down. They definitely knew what they were doing. It made me very uneasy. I was already at a disadvantage after performing most of that day and evening. They always left me feeling physically and mentally spent. I began to suspect someone at the Abbey was behind the attack allowing Bishops escape. Thing was, I couldn't prove it. There were just too many suspects. It could be anyone from a high ranking member of the coven to a lowly servant who could be easily bought. It shook me a little now with Bishop loose, anything could happen.

Over the following days I was kept under close guard as well as Pierre. It was no secret to those in the Abbey what our relationship was, which left him open to attack now. I felt tremendous guilt for placing him in such danger. He didn’t blame me but at the same time I could tell how nervous he had become.

Order of the Old Blood

After Bishop's escape, word had reached some of the old ones from Europe and they joined his new coven, “Order of the Old Blood''. Together taking their ancient blood they created a new flock. With their new army of fledglings they attacked the monastery on Christmas 1775. Unable to defend against his uncle, Brother Leo was driven out. He murdered those left who slept in deep slumber still from the first rebellion. All who did not want to help Bishop in his war against his younger sister Mother Superior and the Coven of Cain were destroyed. The members who were able to flee with Brother Leo stayed at the Abbey for shelter. The Order of Cain was destroyed in one quick coup.

It was in late February of 1776 and the Abbey had been attacked for the third time by Bishop and his ragtag group of renegades. We were able to convince the parishioners that it was just small pockets of rebels against the Spanish that kept attacking for our gold. But it wasn’t helping attendance which lessened the coffers. Not many were coming for the services of a Confessional either. Mother Superior had had enough. She made arrangements to travel to New York to speak with others in the coven to bolster their numbers for protection in New Orleans. The shit was about to hit the fan as they say. She would not let the Coven of Cain fall to Bishop. She would die first before that ever happened. But she could not risk another attack with our numbers so low. Mother Superior was so enraged by Bishops brazen actions but her hands were tied due to bureaucratic protocol for the moment and he knew it. He was determined to take her down and reclaim felt was rightfully his, the Coven of Cain and me. He had been attempting for years to sabotage all she had worked hard to change within the coven. Mother Superior was strongly dedicated to the coven and believed with her whole being that the Abbey served a great purpose. She believed in progression while staying true to the traditions of the Coven of Cain. Bishop wanted to keep the coven the way it had always been. As he and his sister had always run it. Archaic and without regard to human life, or any others, accept their own. In the current times, vampires had to learn to blend into society or continue to hide in shadows forever. Mother Superior saw the many benefits of this. The Abbey flourished in wealth donated by vampires and the Catholic parishioners of New Orleans. No one had known the wiser in the outside world that the Abbey of St. Francis was nothing more than that, just an Abbey.

Lady Char came to my chambers and informed me I would be accompanying Mother Superior on her trip. Brother Leo and her Grace felt it best for me to accompany her instead of leaving me open to perhaps another attack. I barely had time to say goodbye to Pierre and Sebastian before two guards eventually came and escorted me to the carriage. A guard was already seated across from Mother Superior. It was smart to have the extra protection riding with us to port, but I think this was done more in case I decided to make a run for it. The cuffs on my ankles chained together through a metal hoop on the floor were the big give away. I looked at her as if to ask if all of this was necessary. She only looked down her nose at me signaling me to mind my place. To be truthful, my days of trying to escape or run were far behind me. I was beaten down, submissive. Eager now to please those who “owned” me. I had been at the Abbey as a Confessional for over ten months now and had no will or, truthfully, want to run. My days were filled with God, religious routine, and I had the love of my life, Pierre. I no longer questioned my existence, but rather accepted it and embraced it the best I could. I was well cared for and was respected. Life wasn't bad. Once Bishop did what he did to me, I thought all hope was gone. He caused mind to fracture. I just existed day to day drifting through like a ghost. But the actions that Mother Superior took showed me that some did care what happened to me. All at the Abbey had always treated me with kindness. I had my beloved Pierre and my faithful fledgling and best friend Sebastian with me. I had control over my special gifts and control of my life to a point. Much more than I had had since 1730.

As we traveled along in silence I wondered what the Archdioceses could possibly do to help. Would they send more guards? Perhaps they could order her to wake the ones in the tombs. From what was whispered, the vampires that slept there were almost as old as Adam and Eve. Some of Lilith and Cain's first children. I was too deep in thought to notice the armed riders coming towards our carriage. I was brought out of my trance at the sound of the driver crying out, “We are under attack! Renegades!” Suddenly the carriage pitched hard to one side tossing us against the wall. My head hit the windowsill hard, stunning me. Everything got hazy and everything sounded muffled. I felt the snap of the cuffs releasing from my ankles and the collar drop from my neck. Someone pulled on me hard, dragging me from the carriage. I heard Mother Superior scream and I yelled out for her not to be harmed. The guards surrounded her as I was then tossed up on the back of a horse and rode off. I fell in and out of consciousness until we stopped to let the horses rest. My captors placed me next to a fire and set up camp. They all wore black monk robes and a mask to cover their faces. I wasn't sure if they were part of the Order of the Old Blood or just a bunch of rogue vampires. Maybe they planned to hold me for ransom? I'm sure the Abbey would pay a pretty penny to get me back. None would speak to me or tell me what was going on or where they were taking me. But, they did take good care of me. Treated my head contusion and fed me well. Even offered me some sweet honey mead. My head was killing me and I gladly accepted the invitation and let the fine sweet alcohol take the pain away. It was odd, drinking around a fire with no words spoken. But I felt no fear. As I drifted off to sleep that night I found myself missing Pierre deeply. He must be frantic with worry wondering if I was okay. I tried to dream walk to let him know all was well, but I could not find restful sleep. I tried to contact Sebastian telepathically only to get silence in return.

Sensual Comfort

My training began early the following day. Sebastian came and woke me a few hours before I was to begin. He did his best to keep the mood light, and try to keep my fears to a minimum. He could tell I was absolutely petrified. Turns out, I was correct in my feelings. Not in the way you think though. The things I endured during this training would change me forever. Deep in my heart I believe this experience changed me for the better. Sebastian hugged me tight and told me to be brave as the guard came to escort the training chamber.

The training room was large and had tall stained glass windows flanked by heavy velvet curtains. There were several throne-like chairs along the wall and a padded table in the center of the room with straps across it. Various different types of padded benches with shackles attached were also placed around the room. A large fireplace kept the room warm. Candelabras and sconces lit the room. It gave it an almost cozy atmosphere. I saw Lady Char sitting at the far end of the room in one of the thrones. The wall behind her was covered in the largest array of whips, floggers, paddles, leather straps and all the various different types of implements of torture one could ever need. My eyes grew wide staring at all those implements of pain as I could feel myself starting to shake. The rules Lady Char told me the previous day sprang into my mind and I went into the pose she instructed. A smile came to her face as she rose from her seat and came towards me. As I stood, trembling, I was oddly excited to feel her touch again. She ran her hand down my cheek.

“Relax Brother Nicholas. Now, remove your robe please. I wish to see your lovely body again.” she smiled slyly.

I blushed hard, but complied quickly, and back into my submissive pose. Again she smiled. Her hand caressed my hair, down my shoulders and back, then smacked my backside hard! I jumped and put my hands instinctively to my stinging rear.

“Hands up!” she scolded and smacked my ass as hard as she could, causing me to jump once again, this time I did not drop my hands and ate the pain. This pleased her greatly. Lady Char walked over to the wall of doom, as I silently referred to it, and grabbed a thin cane. “Today we are going to test your limits. I need to see exactly how much you can handle. I know you can survive a beating and torture, but I need to see how well you deal with both pain and pleasure together.” I readied myself the best I could. She began to swat me softly, slowly picking up momentum. Each hit landed harder and harder over my back, buttocks and thighs leaving deep welts on my skin. I began to feel a strange tingling of excitement in my loins. The more each hit stung, the more sexually aroused I became. A reaction I had never experienced before. I tried to think of anything to take my mind of the growing pleasure inside me. Lady Char stopped when she noticed my reaction. “My! Your response to my discipline is very intriguing. I must explore this more.” she commented. Going back to the wall of doom she grabbed a heavy leather flogger. She came back and swung the flogger between my legs letting it lick at my genitals. This made me jump and lose my concentration. She did it again flicking it a bit harder this time. A pleasured groan escaped me, taking us both by surprised. “Interesting. I think I will bring in another to join you.” She pulled out a small bell that was attached to her skirts by a long ribbon. Upon ringing it a young man in his early twenties came into the room. He was dressed in fine courtly garb and wore it well. He was very handsome. A human vampire with an elvish face and rosy cheeks. His lips were red against his pale white skin. His eyes melted my heart instantly. Blonde almost white wavy, on the brink of curly, hair that was tied back. He looked at me shyly then dropped to his knees in front of her and showered her feet with kisses. “Remove your clothing my lovely pet. I wish for you to join us. This is Nicholas. The young man I was telling you about. Nicholas, this is Pierre Donadieu. He is my Page and pleasure slave and I wish for him to help with your training. Pierre, Nicholas has had some very unpleasant experiences with men, and I would like you to help him be more comfortable and accepting of male affection. I feel you would be best for this task. Are you agreeable to this?” she asked him seductively.

“Oh yes Mistress! Thank you Mistress. He is quite magnificent. I will do my very best to help him become the perfect Confessional.” he responded excitedly. He had the sweetest French accent like lady Char. He was found abandoned by a vampire who was part of the Order of Cain. He brought the young child to a monastery in Paris that was run by the coven. As Leo did with Sebastian. There he was given the last name 'Donadieu' meaning orphan. Sadly though the vampires at this certain monastery used and abused him. Lady Char saved him from that life at the age of thirteen when she was searching for young men to work at the Abbey as house servants and Pages to guests. She saw something in him and made him her personal Page and over many years it then grew into something more than Page and Mistress. When he was in his early twenties they fell in love thus bringing their relationship to a new level. She was the only one he ever cared to worship. She was his Sire as well. He had been only reborn for about twenty years when we first met. Still, Pierre looked much younger than his actual age making him very attractive to the clientele at the Abbey. Lady Char was able to work a deal with Mother Superior that he would not have to work as a Confessional. She felt he was too weak to handle the abuse, both mentally and physically. Instead his role was to help condition future Confessionals.

His clothes were off in minutes and neatly folded on the chair nearby. His body was fit and flawless. Not a mole or freckle anywhere to be seen. No scars or blemishes. He was slightly taller than I and very well endowed. My toes began to wiggle with nervousness. Lady Char patted my butt and told me to relax. She went back to flogging me and Pierre instinctively took his place in front of me, on his knees. His face was flushed with excitement. It made him even more handsome. I found myself curiously attracted to him. Between Lady Char flogging me and Pierre, there so close, a shutter of pleasure escaped me. She went back over to the wall and grabbed a cat-o-nine tails and a blindfold. Then nodded to Pierre. She placed the cloth across my eyes making sure I could see nothing that was about to happen. “You need to learn to listen to and trust your senses. All of them.” Once she began whipping me he took hold of my cock and began to gently massage it. I went up on my toes instantly wanting to pull away from him but I knew I couldn't. I had to stand still and endure. The harder she whipped me the harder he worked my genitalia. Waves of pain and pleasure began to take over my body. My back felt like a thousand bees stinging me. It fueled the euphoria enveloping my body.

“Do not release your seed just yet Nicholas. I will instruct you as of when. If I choose.”

I nodded that I understood. My ability to speak eluded me at the moment. Pierre released his grip and I felt warm gentle hands guiding me across the room. With his hands he maneuvered me to bend over a bench of sorts. My wrists were cuffed to the legs as my backside stuck up in the air, exposed. My ankles were cuffed to the legs on the other side. The whip once again, lashing at my hindquarters just short of it bleeding. She giggled as she made it jump from side to side. The pain got to me at times that I tried to move to escape the next blow. As soon as I thought I could take no more she stopped. Once again I felt Pierre's soft hands caressing my back and rear. It felt so soothing I let out a grateful sigh. He leaned his body up against mine, his manhood poking the orifice. His hand reached around and began to caress and tug on me. I shook my head no frantically. I was not ready for this. No matter how turned on I was I didn't believe I was ready for this lesson. Lady Char touched my head, “There is nothing you can do to stop this lesson. It is something you must take and learn to enjoy or you will never survive here and Mother Superior will find another, less pleasant station for you. Now, open that pretty mouth of yours and keep it open.”

I did as she instructed as her soft finger touched my tongue. Hot tears started to soak into the blindfold. I was so not ready for this. I felt Pierre gently take hold of my face and slid his silky soft member into my mouth. It was sweet and salty at the same time. I tried to move my head away but he held firmly. He moved himself as if he were making love to my mouth. “Kiss it Nicholas, suckle it with your mouth. Stroke it with your tongue.” He whispered to me. I did my best to follow his instruction. “Yes, That's it Nicholas, ohhhhhh, yes.” He moaned. I felt his sexual energy surge through me. I found myself wanting to please him more. To hear his lovely moaning grow louder. I began to suck a bit more moving my head back and forth. His moaning began to echo off the stone walls and his breathing quickened. I felt his hand on the back of my head guiding the pace now, occasionally hitting the back of my throat making me gag. I suddenly wanted it all to stop. Shamed seared through my being. I felt so dirty enjoying it all. Lady Char was back to whipping me causing the pain and erotic pleasure to build. Pierre came hard as his seed flooded my mouth. I coughed as I struggled to spit it out. He removed himself from my mouth forcing it shut with his hand. “Swallow it. All of it mon petit.” I choked and gagged a bit as it dribbled out the sides of my mouth and down my chin. But I swallowed it all. Even more shame filled me for not handling that better. Not one of my finer moments for sure. Pierre was once again behind me rubbing his hard cock against my ass and playing with my penis bringing it to full attention. The pleasure was building so much inside me I didn't care he was a male. The feeling I had was the absolute most erotic pleasure I had ever experienced. My breathing quickened again as I felt as though I couldn't hold on any longer. Pierre slowly and gently entered me. There was no searing pain or discomfort for the first time. Just powerful euphoric sensations. Tears were now flowing freely as I let myself float into a warm sea of this carnal ecstasy. As the sexual energy grew in me it felt as though I would explode into a million stars. Our bodies fell into rhythmic motions working us both into a frenzy. Our lust filled moans echoed off the walls of the room.

“Please my loving Mistress, let me have release. I beg you. The pleasure I feel from him is too much I can not hold on any longer. I beg of you please!” Pierre cried out to her. She must have given him the signal because the next thing I know he cried out and came hard inside me. This caused me to almost release as well. But I held on. I clutched my hands a fist digging my nails into the palms using the feeling to distract me from cumming.

“Nicholas, you have pleased me greatly in how you have handled this sexual experience. I grant you release. Pierre, help him please.” She instructed him to unbind me from the bench but the blindfold remained on and had me stand back up with my hands behind my head. My legs felt wobbly. In an instant his mouth was suckling lovingly at my manhood bringing me quickly to climax. As I came my body felt as if it was wrapped in a blanket of warm air. My legs went weak and gave out beneath me. Pierre caught me before I hit the floor. He laid me down on the padded table and removed the blindfold then wrapped me in a robe of fur. I laid there for several minutes shaking from pleasurable adrenaline just staring at the ceiling. I couldn't speak. I felt completely spent both physically and mentally. It was the most amazing feeling I had ever felt. He climbed up and laid next to me, taking me in his arms, cuddling me. As much as this action shocked me, it felt incredibly comforting. No one had ever done that with me after sex. None. Lady Char kissed me on the forehead and smiled. I had pleased her. “It seems Nicholas, you are a natural vessel of erotic pleasure. I have never seen Pierre react that way before. The energy the both of you created is unlike anything I have ever seen before or heard. Your cries of passion sounded like a choir singing. Such beautiful music to my ears. I can see it is true what they say about your kind. Made for pleasure you truly are. Mother Superior will be most pleased.”

Without a word, Pierre got up and proceeded to clean me up and help me dress. The day's lesson was done. When I got back to my room, I laid down on my bed still feeling the warm glow around me and soon drifted off to sleep. It was the best night sleep I could remember. When I woke the following morning I felt refreshed and energized. More than I ever felt after drinking blood from Sebastian. He even made mention about how I had a happy content look on my face. One he had not seen in a very long time. And surprisingly I was. I told him all of what happened the day before and how I felt about the whole experience. I wasn't frightened of being a Confessional any longer and wanted to explore how far I could take the pain and pleasure. I felt balanced for the first time ever in my life. Although he didn't understand, he listened and supported my choice. Anything to help me get through the time I had to be there.

For the following weeks to come I progressed quickly through my training. With Pierre by my side it helped immensely. The more time I spent with him the closer we grew. In a way you could consider us lovers. With Lady Char's permission of course. Anything sexual done without the blessing of Lady Char or Mother Superior was greatly forbidden at the Abbey. We were given this exception due to neither of us being confirmed Catholics. It then was not seen as a sin under the eyes of the Abbey. I found a comfort with him I hadn't found in any other. He made me feel wanted, needed, and loved. He took great care of me when we worked through sensitive sexual taboos. He loved hearing stories of my time at sea with Captain Roberts and The Mary Jane. He would jokingly say that one day we should enter into “Matelotag''. It was a civil partnership between two pirates where they could be together in the open so as to not have to hide their affection for one another. They shared property and could live together. The way I felt about him, I didn't protest the idea. I had no clue what my future would hold. Why not have him by my side as I went through my life of immortality. He was a vampire, he could live forever too. “Ensemble pour toujours, together forever.” he would whisper to me. Young and in love I was.

Our relationship also had another side to it. Behind closed doors in our private chambers, he was my Master and I was his ever so loyal and obedient submissive. At times I faltered horribly in certain areas of sex while training under Lady Char's instruction. Pierre took the extra time and care to direct me in what I was doing wrong. One of those areas was giving fellatio. I hated it. It made me feel dirty and used. At the same time those same feelings turned me on. This was how our Dominant/submissive relationship began. It all happened kind of nonchalantly after one of my training sessions. When I did something wrong in our sessions or did not perform to Lady Char’s liking, I was denied climax. I was very sexually pent up. So there I was, a complete frustrated mess and Pierre decided to take advantage of it and have a little fun.

“Come here.” he said sternly pointing to the floor in front of him. I looked at him puzzled.

“I said come here Nicholas. Don't make me say it again.” It was a tone he had never used before. I felt a small ping of excitement. Without a second thought I was on my knees in front of him eager to please. He smiled and stroked my hair, caressed my face and slowly moved his fingers to my lips. Tracing them ever so softly, staring me in the eyes.

“Open.”

I did as told looking away from him.

“Look at me. Do not look away.” Our eyes locked as he slid his fingers into my mouth. Touching and playing gently with my lips and tongue.

“Make love to my fingers with your mouth. Show your Maître how much you love him.” My eyes grew large as he referred to himself as my Master in French. I felt my trousers tighten a bit in the crotch. Eagerly wanting to please him, I suckled, licked and kissed them. His moans let me know I was doing the right things. He took his fingers away and slipped his hard cock out of his trousers.

“Take it into your mouth and do the same as you just were. Don't disappoint me mon petit. Show me how much you care for me. Show me how much you wish to please Maître.”

Oh how I wanted to please him. Pleasure him. Never disappoint him. No one ever in my life made me feel this weak emotionally and left me wanting more. None before him had ever made sex feel the way Pierre did. Taking him fully into my mouth I rolled my tongue around the head, kissing and teasing him a bit. I suckled and licked him as he grabbed the back of my head and forced himself so that it hit the back of my throat. I gagged and tried to pull back which forced him to hold me tighter to him. My mouth was at his mound.

“Relax Nicholas. Breathe through your nose and swallow. This way you don't gag. Yes. Yes, like that. Good boy. Ahhhh, yes mon petit. Keep going.” he continued to use my mouth until he climaxed. Again my first reaction was to try and spit it out. He held my mouth shut.

“Swallow, all of it.”

I closed my eyes and gagged it down. I really had a hard time with the texture of semen. I didn't mind the taste so much, I just couldn't get past the feel of it on my tongue. Tears came to my eyes as I was instantly convinced I had failed to please. My face flushed hot with embarrassment. Without saying a word, Pierre shoved his cock back in my mouth. My tear filled eyes shot wide open.

“Make me hard again mon petit. I am not done with you yet.” he said as he began to move. I did as told with much enthusiasm bringing him to full attention once again.

“Mmmmmm very good. Now go and lay down on my bed, on your back. I want to see your face as I fuck you. Crawl on your hands and knees, I want to watch your ass as you go.” Again, doing as I was instructed. I laid down as he scooped up my legs, bringing them up to my chest. Without any preparation he slid himself easily into me. I moaned out in lust as he pumped in and out of me. The rougher and harder he fucked me the louder I got. I clasped my hands over my mouth desperately trying to muffle my cries. Pierre smiled from ear to ear as he watched my feeble struggle.

“Ensemble pour toujours, mon petit.” He said over and over as he released inside me. “No matter what life throws at us, we will always be together forever my little one.”

Pierre continued to make love to me and fuck me for the rest of that evening. It was the most sexual pleasurable time I had ever had. He left me spent over and over, but yet I could always find the strength to give him all he wanted of me. We fell into a deep sleep in each other's arms. That was where I slept most nights after that. Safely in my lover's arms.

A Search For Absolution

As a Confessional I excelled at my new profession. Clients gave Mother Superior nothing but praise for the gift she had brought to the Abbey. I was showered with tokens and trinkets of affection by those I gave absolution to. All my fear of what my future would hold had faded as I dove full into my new life. But just several weeks after I began, strong vivid nightmares started to plagued me. The nights I slept alone I awoke to the terrifying feeling of my eyes sewn shut. I swore I saw strange shadows along the ceiling of my room, like I was being watched as I slept. As soon as I focused on them they would vanish. What really began to mess with my head were the voices. I first noticed it started shortly after taking my first confession. I could hear everything in the Abbey. All of it, at once. Prayers, confessions, private thoughts, the rats and mice scurrying and squeaking, At times it was maddening. It slowly started to take a toll on me mentally and emotionally. I was exhausted all the time. My head hurt constantly. The only time I found peace was while I was performing confessions or having sex with Pierre. Something about the pain mixed with pleasure helped purge all of that anxiety, fear, and stress I had to deal with daily. When I was finally given the gift of sexual release, I always fell into a deep euphoric state of relaxation. My body would feel weightless. My mind would calm and all became clear. Those evenings I slept deeply, waking refreshed and energized. But as the days would pass, the nightmares would creep back to taunt me until the next confession. Odd things started happening as well. Tingling in my hands began to occur more often. Sometimes little lights would fill the room, flying around like fireflies. Or a spark from my finger would bring flames to whatever I touched. If I concentrated hard enough I could move small objects. I went to great lengths to not let anyone know what was going on with me. Not Pierre. Not even Sebastian.

After one particular rough night of sleep I awoke in severe pain. My body tingled and burned from head to toe, and I felt like my whole body was aflame. The pain continued on and on until I thought I was going to burst. A silent scream escaped me as suddenly a white flash sprung from the middle of my chest hitting the ceiling above me, then vanished. Not a mark was left behind on either me or the ceiling. I laid there frozen in fear of what just happened. This is how Sebastian found me when he brought me my morning meal. Lying paralyzed with fear, eyes fixed above me. He dropped the tray on the table and ran to my side.

“ Nicholas! Nicholas, can you hear me.” he asked frantically as he waved his hand in front of my eyes. “Wake up!” he began shaking me hard pulling me out of the strange stupor. I blinked my eyes a few times. Not sure of what had happened I began to cry. Sebastian grabbed me up and cradled me in his arms. Doing his best to console me. “What is it Nicholas? What has made you so distraught?”

“I, I can't” I sobbed. I had no idea how to explain it all to him.

“Can't what? Please tell me what troubles you so my brother. It truly pains me to see you like this. I know the toll this is all beginning to take on you. I am sorry our plans to get you out of here are not transpiring quicker. I promise you my Sire, we are doing our best to come up with a solid plan.”

I knew he was telling me the truth. I trusted him with my life. And he was right about it all beginning to take its toll. And now, the magical abilities manifesting out of nowhere. But it was something more, much, much, more. I was finally able to collect myself. Taking a deep breath I said to him, “I don't know how to explain it. I don't think I have the proper words. All I can tell you is that I need it. A deep craving for pain and pleasure. As deeply as a vampire craves blood, I crave submission in pain and pleasure. Once my sessions with a confessor end, I have such a feeling of peace and calm afterward. It's the same with Pierre. I yearn for his touch, the feel of his hands on my skin. It's not so much sex I want, it's more the physical touch I crave. I am in love with him. He wants us to be together forever. In the church we are taught that these things are taboo and forbidden. Am I a devil for enjoying all of it? Will I be damned for all eternity to suffer like this? God what's wrong with me?” I sobbed.

“I wish I knew how to help you. The life and disciplines of a Confessional are beyond my understanding. But I do believe in what they are trying to prevent by having someone like you here to take on the desires of sinner vampires of the cloth and give them absolute absolution. It has kept the human public much safer for it. Would it help if you fed from me a bit when these occurrences arise? I mean, it couldn't hurt. Right?”

He did have a point. The sexual attacks and molestations were down considerably over the years since the Abbey was established. And any clergy caught doing nefarious actions with any member of their congregation was castrated and locked away for one-hundred years in tombs within the Abbey.

Sebastian took the knife from the platter on the table and made a small cut on his wrist. Hesitantly I took it and fed. Just enough to stop the ache in my body. Within a matter of minutes I felt much better. A bit more at ease, and surprisingly my mind clearer and I felt healthy.

“You look so much better now Nicholas. Might I suggest perhaps feeding from me more often would help with the problems you have been dealing with? I don't mind. It's the least I can do until we are free of this place.”

I walked over to look in the little mirror on the wall above my washbasin. He was right, I did look much better. My eyes no longer looked tired and were a bit bluer in color. My skin looked healthy as a human. I felt good. We agreed that from then on I would drink from him more often. Because I had been pretty much kept in a continual state of less than healthy since my arrival at Marshalsea Prison and at the monastery they knew from Rhavan's journals to keep me weak. Leo's animal blood and herbal concoctions kept me healthy just enough to keep them sated with my blood. Once I arrived at the Abbey none there were aware of what would happen if I was left to be at my full strength. Not even I myself knew. Now I could freely feed on blood that not only didn't make me sick, but helped me heal and be healthy. Mentally and emotionally though I was still a wreck.

One late Sunday evening after Mass I was summoned to the meeting room to speak with Mother Superior. Dressed in my best Sunday Vestments I was escorted to see her. When I entered she was already seated behind her large oak desk. To say I was nervous was an understatement. She could tell as well I'm sure for she motioned for me to have a seat across from her. Before I even sat the tears began to fall. All this crying was starting to really get to me along with everything else I was dealing with. Tears never fell this easy before. Not even in the worst of times with Rhavan.

“What distresses you so my son?” She asked with genuine concern in her voice. I had no clue why I was crying. All I could do was bury my face in my hands. Through my tears I stammered, “This place confuses me so. I am to perform as a sexual vessel, forced to allow those of the cloth to use me as they wish. Then to top it all off I then must give them absolution of all sin. At the monastery any type of sexual relations were strictly forbidden. We were taught to flog ourselves nightly to prevent sexual thoughts. Now I have to forgive others for using and abusing my body. What troubles me the greatest is that I want the pain and pleasure. I NEED it Mother Superior. It feeds me like blood for a vampire. What is wrong with me? I am a deviant! It is not normal to have these reactions. Who is going to give me absolution and forgiveness for all these nefarious acts perpetrated upon me? Is any of this religion even real? I am forced to read the bible, and know the verse by heart. To perform the ceremonies flawlessly which I do, and do them well. Your coffers are filling more by the week by the amount of confessions I seem to be performing for you. It is so hypocritical. I am so lost. I don't know what to believe anymore. I am expected to follow the word, but yet forced to go against what is preached. So very lost.” I shook my head in shame.

Mother Superior looked at me with her chin resting on her folded hands. “I very much understand the struggle you are having with what you do here. We have asked a tremendous thing of you to be a Confessional. More so since you are not confirmed in the Catholic religion. But you must look at it as doing the Lord's work when it comes to how many innocent humans or clergy you have saved. You take much punishment from some of your confessors and you come away more spiritually powerful from it each time. I also am aware you are going through some personal changes as well. I know that it troubles you just as much. Young Pierre Donadieu has expressed worry for you and your well being. It seems he cares deeply for you. And you for him.”

“I do Mother Superior and it confuses me greatly. I have never had feelings of love like this for any woman. And now here I am, falling for a man. Head over heels in love with a beautiful boy from Paris. I am so ashamed of my feelings. I am an abomination in everything I do. I know this is against what we are taught, but all I’ve ever seen is the love of men all around me. At sea, in prison, the monastery and here.” I wept.

“My dear child, you must never feel shame for laying with a woman or a man. You are a creature of desire. There are many sinners and Saints who lay with the same sex. Love whomever you wish. Love is love. It doesn't always mean sex. Love comes in many different forms. Sunshine is love, a blooming flower is love. God is love. Our Lord Jesus is love. I love you child. Brother Leo loves you. Simon, and Lady Char all have love for you. So you see, love does not always mean carnal relationships. I too am concerned for you and will do what I can to help you resolve all that torments you. We wish you no ill will here. I do not run things as your previous keepers. You have been here only a matter of months and will eventually see this once your inner guard drops a bit. more'' She smiled a kind smile. She rose from her seat and approached me. I dropped to my knees in front of her and proceeded to kiss her feet. She gently touched the top of my head, instructing me back to my knees. “I grant you absolution, my child. God forgives all sin you commit for us in His name. You are forgiven young Nicholas. Please, now no more sadness and no more tears. Go with peace of mind and heart. Go back to your room and perhaps sing or paint or write. It may help calm your thoughts. Go in peace my son.” Mother Superior said escorting me to the door. “I will help you find the answers you see. You have my word.”

A guard escorted me back to my room. Sitting on the edge of my bed I thought over the discussion with Mother Superior. I felt much better knowing that how I felt was not as horrible as I had convinced myself. That no one at the Abbey was going to disrupt my life or take away Pierre as punishment. I was accepted. Fully accepted for who and what I was, whatever that was. But at the time a sense of peace overcame me. For the first time, I picked up a pen and put my thoughts to paper. Brother Leo was right, it did help to write it all out. I was thankful he gave me the journal. From that night on I wrote down everything. My thought’s, dreams’ fears. I wrote about Kryimsson, The Mary Jane and the crew. I wrote about my anger at Rhavan, Bishop and all those who tried to destroy me. I wrote of a future with Pierre. I kept notes of herbalism recipes and religious psalms that called to me.

Vampire Politics

It was now five months since I arrived at Abbey. I had become accustomed to the routine of being a Confessional. In a strange sort of way it suited me. All in all it really wasn't so bad. I didn't have to be food for vampires or worry about when Bishop would molest me next. I was well protected and treated very kindly here. No one judged or looked down on me for the work I was doing. I performed as expected to and gave no trouble. This made Lady Char and Mother Superior extremely happy. More so Mother Superior. I think what she loved the most about my complete and utter submission to her and the Abbey was she had the control over me that Bishop never could. She now possessed the rumored powerful Svartálfar that secured her place as the head of the Coven of Cain. When Mother Superior became the head of the coven Bishop freaked, to say the least. He felt since he was Countess Catherine O'Mannan's brother and second in command of the coven and leader of the Order of Cain, he naturally should be the new leader. His belief was the coven should continue on in the archaic manner as it had always done. Where humans were just chattel to them. And any other coven or vampires who challenged that belief were destroyed. Mother Superior, unlike her predecessor, believed they had to find a way to walk alongside the human world. Which, in the past thirty years as I slumbered was happening. It had to happen. Once Maeve and Demitri created the Coven of the Children of Lilith, they were able to gather the renegades and Sireless fledglings and show them another way. They educated them. Gave those deserving stations and rank within the coven. Some now were store owners, shop clerks, tailors. Tavern owners on Bourbon Street, and restaurants which all catered strictly to the vampire community. Some even attended schools and Universities and taught there as well. And to the non vampire world, no one knew the difference. Since New Orleans was and still is pretty much a twenty-four hour a day city, no one ever questioned places being open until the early morning hours. This in turn enabled the coven to have a solid foothold in the city.

After the assassination of Countess O'Mannan the elders of the Coven of Cain chose Mother Superior over Bishop not because they feared he could not do the job, for which he was more than qualified, but because they knew he was extremely power hungry. Also during the vampire wars, she saved countless ancient vampires from utter destruction who were deep in slumber beneath the Abbey. Most of them were the surviving offspring of Cain and Lilith themselves. She took down those who killed their beloved Countess and attempted to burn down the Abbey. She tore them apart with her bare hands. No weapons or vampiric magic, just her hands. It is said she has the strength of ten vampires. I for one never wish to test that theory personally.

So, while countless vampire lives were being lost on both sides and human lives alike, Maeve sent word to Mother Superior about calling a truce. At first, Mother Superior did not believe the truce to be real since the Coven of the Children of Lilith had such a tight control over the city. But, knowing that her coven was in chaos and was in no condition to continue on fighting, agreed. The truce called for all to adhere to a new set of codes safeguarding the vampire race and that the Coven of the Children of Lilith were the controlling coven of New Orleans. The truce was in place for the past seven years. All seemed to be in harmony. Things remained civil between Mother Superior and Bishop although it was still no secret he was unhappy with how things were changing and progressing within the coven. She allowed him to keep his position even with the knowledge of how he felt towards her.

As I said earlier, I had been at the Abbey about five months when Leo was sent to have council with Mother Superior. She and Lady Char had questions about me that needed answered which I had none. They wanted him to speak with me first in private to see if there was more going that I was not telling them. They felt perhaps I would feel more comfortable speaking with a male of the church. And since he was my caretaker while at the monastery it only seemed logical. Sebastian came to my room and found me reading.

“I'm sorry to bother you Nicholas. Mother Superior would like you to come to the meeting room. She has a guest she wishes you to speak with.” his voice sounded shaky. It made me nervous.

“Who's the guest Sebastian?” I asked cautiously.

“It's Brother Leo.”

I took a deep breath and sighed. I got up and processed to dress in my Confessional robes with his help. He knocked on the door to let the guard know I was ready. Looking back at Sebastian I gave him a halfhearted smile and off down the hallway I went. When we arrived, the Guard knocked on the door and let me in. As I looked around the room it dawned on me it was just Leo and I. Needless to say, I was not pleased to see him, although it was clear on his face he was happy to see me. He greeted me with a tight hug as I stood still with my hands at my side, emotionless. Letting go he nodded he understood why I was standoffish towards him. He looked at me for a few moments. “You look very well Nicholas. Do you fare the same?” During my time at the Abbey I was fed well, both food and blood. I no longer looked sickly and worn down even with the lack of sleep and stress of my magical mishaps. I had not been this healthy since I was back at house Acnar. Even at sea, I was thin and suffered occasionally with bouts of scurvy or dysentery. I was much stronger and healthier than I had ever been in my entire life. My face was full and had the coloring of a human. My eyes were a bright blue and my hair had turned white with the slightest hint of blue if the light hit it just right.

“Thank you Brother Leo.” I responded coldly.

“Are you doing well?”

“I am Brother Leo. Thank you.”

“Are you truly? Lady Char tells me you are having some troubles as of late.” He said looking at me with concern.

“You have me there Brother Leo. Since Lady Char has come to you with her concern, I shall be honest. Although I do not have much trust in you to discuss such matters.” I answered crossing my arms as I sat back in my chair.

“Please Nicholas let me help you. I never wanted to see any harm come to you. I did my best to keep Cardinal Bishop from you, but I failed miserably and can not forgive myself. Perhaps in this way you can learn to trust me and know I only want the best for you. Even in these circumstances. Tell me, what is happening with you?”

He was right. I needed to talk to someone about what I was experiencing, and I knew if anyone would know the answers, it was Brother Leo. I decided to take the chance. Taking a deep breath, I began to tell him. “Ever since I came here I have been feeding from Sebastian. I know you are aware he is my fledgling and has been here as my servant. He is known as Simon here. No one has been the wiser. He has been a great comfort to me. Anyway, I have been feeding from him for several months now. His blood doesn’t make me sick like other human blood does. But then again, he isn't quite human, is he. The thing is, most mornings since I began performing as a Confessional I wake in such agony I feel I'm dying. My body feels as if it's on fire. Waking drenched in sweat. I have no control over my magickal abilities. Worst of all are the voices. I can hear all here in the Abbey. It drives me crazy at times. I can't seem to shut them out unless I feed from Sebastian or granted sexual release. But there is a difference. When I drink blood, it helps sedate the struggles I seem to be having. But when after several confessions, Lady Char rewards me with that euphoric sexual release, I am in total control over my faculties once again. Strong in mind and emotion. The voices are gone. I have a deep craving for pain and pleasure. A feeling I have never gotten from drinking blood. This lasts several days, and then the horrific nightmare begins, and the cycle continues.”

Brother Leo sat quietly for some time, thinking about what I had said to him. He pulled out a small notebook from his robe and began to jot down something.

“What are you doing there?” I asked.

“I am taking some notes. My mind is sharp, but I can't remember everything young one.” he chuckled. “May I ask you some questions about your childhood? About your parents? About the Svartálfaheimr? Rhavan's journals lack many important details about you. Perhaps I can find some answers this way. Perhaps what you are experiencing has something to do with being a Svartálfar.”

He had a very logical answer and couldn't find argument at all with it. “Well, what do you want to know? I will do my best in giving you as honest of an answer when I can. I have blocked out a lot over these past one hundred-four years of this long life.”

“What do you remember of your Mother?”

“She tried to execute me.” I said matter of factly.

“Yes, I am aware of that, and I am sorry for that. But that isn't quite what I meant. Do you know anything about your family lineage?”

“I know very little. I am told that I look very similar to her. I know my mother's name was Queen Jeni Tazbbár of the Svartálfaheimr in Scandinavia. My father, who was her patron, came from a royal family as well I have been told. His name was Prince Rideau de Loppedell. The only surviving son of the Queen of the Deep, Queen Elenoria de Loppedell from below the Brecon Beacons in Wales. Out of the thirteen children they had together, I was the only male.”

“You were born the thirteenth child?”

“Yes.”

“Interesting. Hmmmmmm, very interesting. Is there anything else you can remember?” he went on jotting down stuff in his notebook.

“No.”

“May I get a sample of your blood to take back with me?” I shrugged and agreed. What could it hurt? I allowed him to make the usual small cut on my wrist and he only took a little which he wiped with a white cotton cloth.

“May I ask you a question Brother Leo?”

“Of course you may Nicholas, anything!”

“What do you know about me? What exactly did Rhavan write about me in those journals?” I could tell the question took him a little by surprise.

“What do you want to know?” he asked puzzled.

“What did he really want of me? Other than my blood to sustain him and his brood. Why me?”

His face turned a bit sad. “You were meant to be brought straight to the Countess after he stole you from the executioner's blade. She planned to use you as a powerful weapon against all other covens and rogue vampires to give the Coven of Cain overall power. She planned to test you herself. And if you survived her tortures and tests, she would control you to destroy all who opposed the coven.”

So much began to make sense with Rhavan and his experiments. I wasn't angry for what Leo just told me. I was actually grateful he was so honest. “So, I wasn't sent to the monastery to be food?”

“No, you were only meant to be with us for a short while. Only a matter of months. But when you first arrived you fell ill, and Bishop became obsessed with you. There was no way of talking sense to him after he began feeding from you. He seemed unhinged after we were finally able to send you here. Although you waking Maeve and Demitri caused us to fall a bit from Grace, it was the best thing for you and your safety. I was at a point I could not protect you any longer from Bishop and his obsession and rage. Placing you in deep slumber and bleeding you kept him sated. Once you began to awaken I made arrangements to have you brought here. For I could no longer in good consciousness keep you locked in that coffin.”

“So, does the Mother Superior plan to use me as a weapon?” I asked sternly.

“Oh, no! Not at all. She is very pleased with you as a Confessional. She has no need for weapons for she is one of the most powerful vampires walking this earth. Plus she does not believe in prophecies. No my boy, you are very safe here. Safer than I can ever keep you.” he said sincerely.

Satisfied with the answers I received, our meeting pretty much ended there. He promised me one more time he would help find the rest of the answers I needed. When I got back to my room, Sebastian was waiting there, pacing the room nervously. He gave me a big hug and seemed very relieved to see me.

“That was an unexpected greeting from you. Are you okay?” I asked, chuckling.

“I was afraid he was going to bring you back with him to the monastery. There has been talk that Bishop wants you back there. What did Brother Leo want?”

“Well as you can see, I am still here. And no, I didn't get the feeling he was here to disrupt things. He was actually asked to come here by Mother Superior to speak with me about the strange changes I have been going through. I think he really wishes to help me. You told me yourself that he wanted to help.” Trust me, I wasn't being gullible. I truly felt he was sincere.

Brother Leo's Confession

Several days later Brother Leo came back to the Abbey wishing to question me more on what had been happening to me. Mother Superior agreed, wanting to get to the bottom of my mysterious issues. He observed my sleep for a few nights, Taking blood samples each day. He would ask me so many questions I would have to scold him to give me a break. “What does all of this matter?”

“With all these questions I can help figure out what is going on inside of you. It is no secret that you are not a typical Svartálfar. Not a typical vampire. All of the herbal blood concoctions I made for the others would only work on you for a short while, perhaps only a matter of months. Something within you kept waking you. But, it didn't want blood. It needed energy. What type I could not tell, you were too weak. Do you remember when the strange things happening to you began?”

“As I told you before, shortly after I was able to feed from Sebastian on a regular basis, at first it was once a week. My magical abilities slowly began to manifest once again. When I was sent to prison and kept in such a weak state they went dormant. Then maybe after a month as my training completed with Lady Char and began performing as a Confessional I found I needed the blood less and less. But craved sex more and more. I feel such shame over it.”

“And how do you feel after performing a confession?”

“It depends on what I am asked to do. If I have to give discipline, I feed off their pain and the smell of fresh blood stirs my hunger. But when I am the one who receives the discipline, I feel relaxed, almost as if I was floating. Then that night I have horrendous nightmares and would wake in a cold sweat with my body feeling it was on fire. When Lady Char would grant me sexual release by her lovely hands or when Pierre and I made love I felt as though I would explode. I felt rested and strong. I could shut out the whispering voices. I slept soundly. I felt good for days. But once I begin performing, the cycle will start again.”

“Would you be opposed to me observing you perform?”

“Honestly, I am apprehensive, but I understand you need to see what is happening with your eyes.”

Following our conversation Brother Leo went to Mother Superior and asked if he could observe me performing a confession. She saw nothing wrong with it. I on the other hand still felt self conscious enough as it was without having an audience. Little did I know, he was to be my confession. When I entered the room , as I always do, I do not see who my client is. My eyes are focused to the floor. I lay in prostate until directed. “Please, rise.” the voice said. It was male, and it was familiar. The person was deliberately trying to disguise their voice. “I would like you to purge my sins through pain. I beg for absolution.”

“What are the sins you wish to confess?” I asked with compassion.

“I abandoned one I shouldn't have out of fear. I chose duty and protocol over rule my logic and emotions. When I should have acted I could not. I was frozen in place as I heard the screams of the one I loved.”

Like a punch to the chest, it hit me. It was Brother Leo and he was talking about me. I stood stunned as he removed his robes letting them drop to the floor. He stood before me naked, tears streaming down his cheeks awaiting my direction. What did he mean by, 'he loved me'? Confessionals were forbidden to ask questions. And to address it afterwards would have been in poor taste and a betrayal to his confession. As uncomfortable I was, I had to fulfill his wishes.

“How would you like to purge your sins Brother Leonardo O'Mannan?” I asked nervously.

“It is truly your forgiveness I seek, not Gods. ”I will let you choose.” his voice trembled. Fine. If that is truly what he wanted, then I would give it to him. Taking from the wall a heavy leather flogger with little knots tied in its trestles, I approached. “ Stand in front of me, hands clasped behind your head.” he quickly did as I instructed and our session began. I started off slowly, softly, as Lady Char had done with me on numerous occasions. In time my pace quickened and the blows to his back came harder and harder until I made him break down sobbing. He dared not move, he took every stroke.

“Have mercy upon me, Oh God! Forgive me! Forgive my lack of action. Forgive my weaknesses. Give me the strength to do what is right. Give me strength O' Lord. Help me. Show me the way to salvation.” he wept.

“Do you truly seek absolution Brother Leonardo O'Mannan?” I asked as I whipped him with all the anger I had pent up for what happened at the monastery. The thirty years I was chained in a coffin. For feeling abandoned by Kryimsson. Ten years in prison. I took it all out on him as I whipped him bloody.

“Have mercy upon me, O' God, according to thy lovingkindness: according unto the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin. For I acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin is ever before me against thee, thee only, have I sinned, and done this evil in thy sight: that thou mightiest be justified when thou speakest, and be clear when thou judgest.” he responded, lamenting in near hysterics. A strange ping hit my chest. A strange, almost strangling sensation. I could actually feel his remorse. His sorrow came from the depths of his soul. Brother Leo dropped to his knees, clutching my Vestments and sobbed. “No more, for God's sake no more. Forgive me Nicholas. I beg you. I love you. Forgive, please forgive me. I can't.”

All anger and resentment left me in that instant. It truly broke me to see him like this.

“Nicholas, dearest Nicholas, I can not express how sorry I am that I let you down. I am sorry I didn't stop Bishop. Please forgive me. I need your forgiveness. The weight of the guilt I carry has become too much to bear.” He was a complete emotional mess. Dropping the whip I fell to my knees and took him in my arms, comforting him.

“We have sinned, and have committed iniquity, and have done wickedly, and have rebelled, even by departing from the precepts and from thy judgments: Neither have we hearkened unto they servants the prophets, which spake in thy name to our kings, our princes, and our fathers, and to all the people of the land. O' Lord, righteousness belonged unto thee... O' Lord, to us belongeth confusion of face, to our kings, to our princes, and to our fathers, because we have sinned against thee. To the Lord and God belong mercies and forgiveness, though we have rebelled against him. I forgive you. I forgive you Brother Leo. Please forgive yourself. I love you Brother Leo and wish not to see you suffer any longer. As you wish not to see me suffer.” I held him a bit longer and we said the Lord's prayer together.

After our session Brother Leo dressed and had Lady Char join us in the room. She had been standing out in the hall the entire time. Walking over to me she smiled, “We are going to have a little fun, you and I. Thank you Elder Brother Leo for allowing me to help you in helping our dear Nicholas. I have grown quite fond of him and wish to see him suffer no longer.'' She caressed my face gently. She walked over and rang a little bell that sat on the table near the door. Pierre walked in and went right to Lady Char's feet, showering them with kisses. He then sat next to her like an obedient dog. Her ever faithful boy. He gave me a sweet loving smile. It always melted my heart. I was in love with that sweet French boy. Brother Leo noted my reaction to Pierre in his little notebook. She tapped his shoulder and he scurried over and showered my feet with kisses as well. I was not used to that since it was usually me kissing his feet behind closed doors.

“Nicholas and Pierre, I wish to see you together. Pierre, bring Nicholas to climax, but not too quickly. Brother Leo is here to observe. Are you comfortable with this my pet?”

“Yes Mistress.” he answered happily.

Pierre proceeded to undress me slowly. Kissing my skin as he removed the robe. Then he placed a blindfold across my eyes. I found it helped me get lost in the sensations of pain and pleasure easier. I used to fear the dark, but not under these circumstances. I felt I had better control over my thoughts and emotions this way. Lady Char gave me a good working over with a heavy flogger bringing me into the ever familiar floating euphoric mind space I craved. Once she felt I was prepped enough, Pierre took his place behind me and slowly penetrated. A lustful moan escaped me as we moved in rhythmic time. His lips softly kissing my back as his hand worked my shaft. Our breathing quickened and we soon found ourselves nearing orgasm. Lady Char gave a slight nod of her head and Pierre whispered, “maintenant mon amour” in my ear. Sending a shudder through me, together we climaxed and once again the release I had was ecstasy personified. The sensation of calm enveloped me and for a moment I had forgotten Brother Leo was even there. It took a little time before I could collect my wits. I felt like I was on a cloud. All I wanted to do was sleep. Lady Char and Brother Leo both agreed that we were done for the day and I was free to go and recoup back in my room.

Control

It was after Sunday's midnight Mass that I was summoned to see Mother Superior. Brother Leo had urgent news for me. He barely waited for me to grab a seat before he started. “Do you remember back when you first arrived at the monastery, when you fell gravely ill? I had discovered then that Rhavan failed to turn you fully into a vampire. And since you are a natural born immortal, you can't die. In order to become a vampire, one must pass through the moment of death as you well know. I had believed you to be a new species of vampire. But how very wrong I have been. Not only do you carry the traits of a vampire, but you are Incubus as well. I figured it out as soon as I saw you and Pierre together. Your skin became almost radiant and your eyes turned a light smoky gray. That doesn't happen to vampires when they have sex. I did not say anything right then because I wanted to make sure I was positive in my assumption. It seems in order to be in balance within yourself, not only do you need blood to nourish you, you need sexual energy to feed you. That may be why you can only feed from those of the blood of the Nephilim. Perhaps, if you are fed human blood as you feed from sexual energy, or sexual release, you may be sated.” Leo explained to me.

“So I am a demon?” I asked sadly.

“In part yes, but your soul is not. If you were truly an agent of Satan, you would not be able to survive within any religious setting. But yet here you are and have been since you left England.”

I sat and absorbed all he said to me. It made sense that the incubus part of me would awaken at the time I was reaching sexual maturity. My body laid dormant for so long my natural ability to mature stunted. Like being in suspended animation. Once I came to the Abbey, and was able to have blood that kept me healthy, my body began it's cycle into adulthood. Being a Svartálfar we age much slower than humans. Being a vampire slowed it even more. Vampires do age contrary to popular belief. It is at an extremely slow rate. Injury, illness, drugs, alcohol and a dangerous lifestyle also age vampires at a quicker rate. The only way they can return to looking younger was to drink blood. The difference with mine was it is fae blood. Extremely rare in these times. All fae blood is an “elixir of life” to vampires. Some of the abilities I developed as the incubus became more active the more often Pierre and I were together. I could dream walk. If I concentrated hard enough I could place myself with a dream. I only did this once with Pierre. It felt too much like I was invading his privacy. Other things I could do was turn to a misty fog, and float like a ghost. That felt extremely weird. But it came in handy when trying to get out of dangerous places later in life. I was stronger and faster than your typical vampire now as well. I healed even quicker than before with just sexual energy. The more I worked as a Confessional the less hung up I became about the act of sex. To me that is all it was, just an act. My body was my tool and I was able to separate the trauma of my past from the sexual things I had to perform now. I allowed the incubus part of me take over. Like stepping outside myself, or becoming a different person. I was able to portray a God fearing obedient sexual submissive vessel of forgiveness flawlessly. But when I was with my “mate” I was with him, body, mind and soul. It was all his. When we had our intimate time alone together we both could drop our subservient roles and just be ourselves. Letting our passion control our bodies. Our love felt very intense to me. I had never felt the likes before. The world outside my room didn't exist. It was just us in each other's arms. I was becoming content. I had Pierre's love. Confessions were just work. And had my best friend Sebastian by my side. I was heavily considering telling Sebastian I wanted to remain at the Abbey. I honestly was beginning to enjoy the routine and life was actually pretty good. No one was beating me, raping me, feeding from me or anything else against my will. I felt I had control over my life for the first time in a very long time.

A Reunion Long Time Coming

The following morning we broke camp and traveled about an hour before we arrived in New Orleans. It was a section I didn't recognize. We pulled up to a very large three story house with elaborate oriental decoration on a very busy street. It was painted a bright brick red, like in the orient. Gold dragons flanked the front door that had a sign saying “House of Otherworldly Delights'' above it. Now this had me quite curious as to which way this predicament was going to lead me. I now knew at least I was not kidnapped by Bishops fledglings. Was I kidnapped to come work in a brothel? It would be a great money for a brothel to possess a Confessional. Strangely I felt no fear or worry although I still had no clue who my captors were. As I was brought in we entered into the main entrance way. The walls were decorated with beautiful plaster murals and embroidered tapestries. The entertaining parlors walls were covered in beautiful print wallpaper that shimmered in the light. It was surprisingly warm inside. Which was heated by a magickal hot spring below the building. The furniture was red lacquer with black velvet fabric. Mirrors covered the ceilings of the main floor. In the middle of the first floor was a beautiful Zen garden fed by the natural spring. It was still early morning so there were no clients awake and roaming yet. The mysterious men who grabbed me from the carriage left me in the care of a young woman, then suddenly disappeared. The woman introduced herself to me as Remmy. She was short and stocky, had a thick Scottish accent, short tight curly copper colored hair with bright green eyes and a big smile. She proceeded to hurry me off to get cleaned up before they opened. Apparently I had arrived much earlier than expected and my quarters were not prepared yet. In the meantime I was brought into a room that had several bathtubs. A servant filled one with hot water and left me in silence. I caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror as I stood soaking in the current situation. I was covered from head to toe in dust from the road. I undressed out of my dirty Sunday vestments and slowly lowered myself into the water. It felt wonderful. The water was so warm which helped relax my tired bones. As I bathed I wondered what had happened to Mother Superior. I honestly hoped she was left unharmed. It was unheard of to have a confessional kidnapped from the Abbey. Then again, I wasn’t just some ordinary confessional, was I. My heart ached tremendously for Pierre. I would not be able to sleep well until he knew no harm had come to me. Still I knew somehow that I was not in any danger, and that Bishop was not behind this. I tried not to dwell on it too long. I was enjoying the warm bath but didn't soak too long as to not anger my new host(s). Drying myself off I looked in the mirror again. Glancing at the scar on my chest that Rhavan had left there when he branded me as his. It had happened so long ago but yet at times still felt like it was yesterday. I shook off the chill at the thought of him and got dressed. The clothing left for me was a beautiful royal blue cotton shirt, a warm overcoat, black trousers, long socks and a nice new pair of shoes that fit. When I came out of the room, Remmy stood and smiled ear to ear as her green eyes grew wide. “My, my, you clean up very nicely for a monk. The Madam will be quite pleased.”

I smiled shyly at her. Maybe this wasn't gonna be that bad. I already knew how bad it could have gone. I actually felt very safe. I know, it's strange to feel safe when you have just been kidnapped and brought to a brothel. She took me gently by the arm and walked me up a staircase to the second floor. As we walked down the hallway she said, “Now for proper introductions. First off, you are Nicholas. Am I correct?”

I nodded 'yes'.

“My name is Remmy and I help run this establishment. I am sure you are not that naïve and have figured out by now what kind of business is run here. All are expected to be on their best behavior around guests and don't ever embarrass the Madam. The first and second floors are for business only. The upper floor is the living quarters for all the girls, house keepers and other servants. The rules here are simple and we should get along fine so long as you obey.”

I nodded that I understood. So, it seems they plan to keep me here. Strange happenings for sure I thought to myself. She proceeded on to tell me the rules of the house and what my duties were to be. Arrangements were made that I was to work in the kitchen. I wasn't too thrilled to be a galley grunt once again, but it was definitely better than being forced to sleep with the vampire clergy or any one else for that matter. This situation puzzled me even more now. Remmy introduced me to the rest of the household staff, about fifteen servants in all. Then I was brought to a small room that was off the kitchen, which was mine. It was a nice little room with a big bed in the corner. Laying on the bed was a small bundle wrapped in white cloth and my pouch that had been taken from me back when I was plucked out of the ocean by the Royal Navy. 'How on earth?’ I thought to myself in amazement. I was so happy it found its way back to me after almost forty-five years. Once I was alone I went and dug through it. Twelve pieces-of-eight, several gems and rings, and a most dearest possession. Pulling out the necklace with Kryimsson's ring on it a tear came to my eye. With a sigh of sadness, I turned the middle of the ring for a little while hoping he'd feel the call. I missed him so much. It had felt as though there was a small hole in my soul left from his absence. I wondered what had happened to him after the ship sank. Where did he go? Why the deafening silence all these years after all we’d been through together? My attention snapped back to the bundle. Inside I found my bible, a scourge whip and my journal from the Abbey. Whoever was behind me being here knew me and my background enough to get my personal belongings back. My thoughts then drifted to Pierre. A strong sense of worry hit me for him. The fear and stress he must be going through. I was sure the whole Abbey was in an uproar about my kidnapping. My heart felt heavy. I felt guilty for not being more frightened about where I was and found myself missing them all very much. I would try to contact them somehow to let them know I was fine. Did I even want to go back given the choice? Maybe I could convince Pierre to come with me? Then again his loyalty to Lady Char ran deep. I was allowing my thoughts to run ahead of themselves. All of that would be worked out later. First things first. Figure out why I was brought here.

Later that evening after supper I was brought to the main entertaining parlor room. When I entered Sebastian came out of nowhere and grabbed me in a tight hug almost tackling me. “I told you we would get you out of there! I told you! I am so happy we pulled it off! Do you believe me now Nicholas?” he giggled at me.

“Wait! It was you who attacked the carriage? Why did you keep yourself hidden from me until now?” I asked puzzled.

“Yes, myself, Demitri and a few others from the coven. I'm sorry again it took so long to get you out of the Abbey. With the rogue attacks on the Abbey from Bishops renegade followers, we figured Mother Superior would put blame for the attack on him. Never suspecting another coven's involvement. It was the perfect cover.”

“Why did you not fill me in on the plans?”

“I was afraid you wouldn't want to leave. You had become content there. That the love you had for Pierre would change your mind.”

“I understand your concern and I am missing Pierre greatly and I am sure he is terribly worried, as is Mother Superior, but I am so very grateful to you and God. Even with how well I was treated, I am thankful to be here with you.” I hugged him tightly.

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed a tall, well built man hidden under a cloak. He stepped towards me and drew back the hood slowly. I staggered back rubbing my eyes in disbelief. They had to be playing tricks on me, they just had to be. Was it him? Was it really him? There standing before me was Kryimsson! I jumped at him, throwing my arms around him, hugging him in the tightest hug I could give. He did so in kind. The two of us stood holding each other and sobbed with joy. I didn't even notice others were in the room with us. After a bit we were able to compose ourselves. “Where have you been? What happened to you? Oh, how I have missed you my old friend” I cried.

“After the ship sank, I believed you lost to Davy Jones Locker. At first, for a couple of years I tried to drown myself in a bottle, but it did no good. I mourned you too much. I felt I had failed you. I went far into the deep forests of Ireland and dug as far down into the dirt as I could and went to sleep. I had no plans to ever wake again. But about a month ago, my dear twin sister, Maeve, called to me. Only her voice could stir me from my slumber. She sent me visions of you. I had to come to you at once. Oh, my dear Nienar, the happiness I feel right now surpasses anything I have ever felt in my very long life. I am so sorry you felt abandoned. That was never my intention. Maeve and Sebastian have caught me up on all that has happened over these many years. My heart truly breaks for you at what you had to go through at the hands of Bishop. I promise I will never leave you again.” He said hugging me tightly again. When he called me Nienar it took me back a bit. It had been so long since I had heard that name.

“Everyone calls me Nicholas now. It's a lot easier for others to say and less questions about where the name comes from.” I chuckled.

“Then Nicholas, it is my friend. Gods how I missed you!” He looked down at me with happy tears in his eyes, giving me another tight hug. “My how you have changed! So mature now. Last I saw you, you looked like a lad of fifteen. Now, you are a young man. Healthy, and happy?”

“Ey, I am healthy, thanks to Sebastian and the Abbey. Happy? Content perhaps.” My thoughts drifting once again to missing Pierre tremendously. I had now been missing from the Abbey for over twenty four hours. He must be inconsolable by now. My heart ached suddenly. It brought back the feeling I had from the silence from Kryimsson. “I have to ask you though, why the silence when I tried to contact you telepathically.”

Grabbing my shoulders, he looked down at me and sighed. With a sad blue eye, he said, “I failed you. I failed you tremendously as a mentor and a friend. I was never a good Sire. I should have taught you more about what it was to be a vampire. I took for granted that we had more time for those things. You seemed so distraught after we spoke about immortality. To add what it was to be one of us I felt was too much to pile on after everything else you had been through. When vampires share blood they also develop a psychic attachment. Since I was not your Sire and we did not share blood often, I gave you the ring. Once the ring was out of your physical possession we lost connection. I can not begin to describe the feelings that swelled up inside me when I felt the call of the ring earlier today. I wanted to come to you then and there. But Maeve was right. You needed a bit of time to gather yourself.” He hugged me once again.

Next I saw Maeve. She was even more beautiful than I remembered. Her fiery red hair was pinned up in curls. Her blue eyes twinkled in the candle lit room. Hitting me like a brick to the head it finally clicked that Kryimsson and Maeve were twins. They had each other's eyes. Her pale skin glimmering within the long, elegant, deep purple velvet dress she wore. Next to her stood Demitri Faust dressed in a nice suit of red and black satin. His brown wavy hair framed his chiseled face. It made his piercing light brown eyes stand out even more. A strange pull of attraction for him hit my stomach for only a moment, like a flutter of butterflies. I pushed it out of my mind. “What of Mother Superior? You didn't harm her did you? Please tell me she is safe.” I asked with tremendous worry.

“Nicholas, she is perfectly fine. She was never our target. Nor would we ever want to harm her. No reason to tempt war among us. We just wanted you my boy. I want to personally thank you again for freeing Maeve and I all those years ago. We owe you so much. None of this would have ever been possible without you. How can we ever begin to repay you?” Demitri smiled as he slid his arm around her waist hugging her.
“You already have. I am reunited with my beloved friend and Sire and Sebastian, my loyal friend and brother. We are all together now. I couldn't think of a greater gift. This is payment enough.” I answered sincerely. “Perhaps there is one other thing, if I may ask?”

“Of course you may!” Maeve said.

“I need to send word to Pierre Donadieu that I am safe. He and I are very close and he must be worried sick about me. I can not remain here in good conscience without him knowing I am safe.”

“I will go back to the Abbey and let him know Nicholas. I agree, he must be told. It wouldn’t be fair for him to agonize over not knowing if you are alright.” Sebastian said.

Maeve came over to me and embraced me. She felt so amazing in my arms. It felt as if no time had passed since I first let her feed from me at the monastery. We all sat, drank and laughed way into the late evening hours until Maeve and Demitri had to retire before the sun rose. Demitri did not have the gift to day walk like Kryimsson, Sebastian, myself and Maeve. He was only human. Maeve slept most of the daylight hours since she did work all night greeting guests and whatnot.

Kryimsson, Sebastian and I talked well into the early morning hours. I told Kryimsson about how Sebastian came to be my fledgling and our time back at the monastery. I was so happy to be there with all of them. But there was an underlying sadness. I missed the Abbey and I greatly missed my beloved Pierre. I would be lying if I didn't admit to crying myself to sleep for the first several nights. At times it was hard to breathe without him next to me. Maybe he and I could see each other. For now though, I had to learn to navigate this new world on my own.

House Of Otherworldly Delights

Within a matter of days I had fallen into my new routine at the ‘House of Otherworldly Delights.’ I was working in the kitchen with the cook, Minerva. She was human, an older woman of perhaps fifty years of age. Heavy set with big warm brown eyes and long gray, almost white hair she kept in a tight bun. She was German and pretty strict, but since I already knew my way around a kitchen she didn't have much of a problem with me. I was in charge of food prep and making sure the pantries were well stocked. I would venture out with a hidden heavy guard at sunrise to gather the day's supplies. Since it was feared that not just the Abbey would be looking for me but Bishop as well, sunrise was the most opportune time. Vampires were settling in to sleep the daylight hours away. So I would work in the kitchen from before sunrise to about mid afternoon prepping breakfast for the house staff and overnight guests. Then after I was able to have a few hours to myself where I would write in my journal, read or nap the hours away and then back to the kitchen to help in the early evening. Preparing finger food for the clients and guests of the brothel and supper for the house. After that my evenings were all mine. I mostly kept to myself when not with Sebastian or catching up with Kryimsson. I was quiet and did my work quickly. It seemed to please Minerva. I was able to continue to feed when needed from Sebastian and had no nightmares since my arrival. Sadly though I still had no direct contact with Pierre. Sebastian was able to get word to him I was fine but did not give much information to him more than that.

The 'House of Other Worldly Delights' catered to humans, vampires and other types of non-human clientele. It worked pretty much the same as the Abbey, which helped keep the humans in New Orleans a bit safer. The human clientele knew what was going on at the brothel and most offered themselves freely as blood donors. The truce between the covens of New Orleans was still in strong effect unaffected by the actions of the Order of the Old Blood. Clients could come to our establishment without fear of attack from one another. Life in the Crescent City was calm and blissful.

During this early time at the brothel Maeve and I grew closer over time. I just could not resist her charms. Her smile melted my heart every time I saw her. I was confused by the incredible need I felt for her and how much I yearned for Pierre. She had a hold on me like no other. There was something about her that made me want to worship her. To take care of her every want and whim. To protect her with every bit of my being. She taught me how to dance elegantly and be a refined gentleman. She was strict but patent. Maeve did not believe in the Christian ways and forbade any of it within her establishment. I carried myself in a priestly manner without meaning to. I didn't judge or preach, it was just my quiet demeanor. I went to great lengths to hide the religious charms I still wore around my neck on a chain. I hid my bible under my mattress and flogged myself in private when all were fast asleep.

She would give me little lustful glances, a quick playful fondle here and there but nothing much more than that in public. But there were times behind closed doors that if we were able to unleash the passion between us, it could have burned the house down. She would touch my skin and a jolt of euphoria would go from my head to toes. I yearned to taste her, to feel her body against mine. To hear her moans of pleasure echoing through the room at the touch of my hand. I wanted to be more to her than a servant but she was my Mistress and I would not push for anything that would not be proper to her. Still, something deep inside me told me she wanted me just as badly. But protocol is protocol. And she was my best friend's twin sister. I didn't want to disrespect him in any way by crossing any taboo boundaries or cause waves between her and Demitri. It was no secret his feelings for her. He was deeply in love with her. I was not sure if she felt the same for him. She was always flirty but also very reserved with her true feelings. It was near impossible to read her.

Maeve seemed very pleased with how quickly I adapted to my new surroundings and after a couple of months she felt that I deserved a better station within the brothel. I was to become her personal attendant. My responsibilities were to be her personal guard, dresser, servant. My quarters were moved to a small room next to hers. It was nicely decorated. The bed was a bit bigger and much more comfortable. I had a writing desk and a few bookshelves, but not a lot of books on them. My journal and a few personal books were already moved to the nightstand next to the bed. When I was not working I still stayed to myself. Spending the time in my room reading, playing cards with Kryimsson and hanging out with Sebastian. I was still very stuck in the quiet routine I had back at the Abbey, sans the confessions. I missed Pierre dearly. I thought of him every day. My heart ached for his gentle touch. But I knew I could not reach out to him. Demitri and Maeve had forbidden it. I was not allowed any contact with anyone from the Abbey.

Since I had no real knowledge of how to be an attendant to someone, I went by what I remember Pierre did for Lady Char. My first night was eye opening. It was still early in the evening before opening. To say I was a bit nervous would be an understatement. Knocking, I waited for her response. When I walked in she was sitting at her dressing table. Without looking up from her book, she motioned for me to approach. Doing as I was instructed I then dropped to my knees and showered her feet with kisses. Her hand gently touched the top of my head and she pushed on my shoulder.

“Sit up on your knees. Why did you just do that?” There was a hint of coldness in her voice that I had only ever heard her use when talking with the house staff. Then again now that I was her new attendant that made me her servant as well. Blinking a few times, I finally found my tongue.

“I..I..I.. I'm so sorry my Mistress. Please forgive Mistress. I meant not to anger you. I fear I have overstepped my bounds. I am fretfully sorry my Mistress.” I pleaded, fighting back tears. That caught me off guard, the tears. I was confused why I was having that type of reaction to her displeasure. It was the same strangling feeling I got when I feared I had displeased Pierre. I wanted to please her, but why I took it so personally I really had no clue.

“Where did you learn that protocol? I know it was not in any of those religious institutions you have been in.”

“It is something I did learn back at the Abbey, Mistress. By watching the attendant to my Mistress, Lady Char. All of the personal attendants are taught to greet their Masters and Mistresses in that fashion.” I swallowed back the overwhelming nervousness that was building inside me.

“I shall have none of that behavior here. No other religion is prohibited in this house other than the worship of the Coven of the Children of Lilith and myself. Is that understood Nicholas?”

“Yes my Mistress.”

“I will let this go this one time since you are still getting accustomed to living among common men. Now, for some new rules. Firstly, you are to prepare my meals yourself and bring it to me at the beginning of each evening when I wake. You will always taste it first in my presence. It is not that I don't trust you, but one can not keep an eye on all that goes on in the kitchen nor the pantries. Am I correct?

“Understood my Mistress.”

“Then you will help me get into these ungodly gowns and help me with my hair. If you do not know how, I suggest talking to one of the girls. Secondly, when I greet guests you are to be three feet behind me at all times. Keep your eyes and blade sharp. Keep your ears open. Report anything you think might be of any importance to me or the coven. When we travel you will be my personal escort. If you feel a situation is more than you can handle you may have Sebastian accompany us. His shape-shifting abilities may come in handy. Thirdly, after all the clients have left and guests are settled in their rooms and the brothel is closed down for the evening, you are to help me undress, bathe and brush out my hair. I sleep in the nude, so there will be no need for you after that. Is that understood? Wait, oh my! Is that a hint of blush in your cheeks boy?”

I nodded. I understood what was told to me and struggled to hold back a smile. The thought of her naked made a tingle of energy go through me head to toe. Maeve chuckled under breath and handed me her hairbrush.

“You pull my hair or tug too hard, your backside will feel the back of this brush. Is that understood Nicholas?”

“Yes Mistress.” I stammered nervously taking the brush from her hand. I swallowed hard and gently began. To say I did not feel that brush against my backside later that night I would be remiss.

The rest of the evening went pretty smoothly which I was extremely grateful for because I was a nervous wreck thinking about what was coming. After everything was shut down for the night I helped Maeve as instructed, settling her in for the evening. Once she slipped into her dressing gown she handed me her brush. With widened eyes and a chest full of anxiety I did my best. I did better than earlier but it wasn't enough to save me.“Drop your trousers boy and bend over the chair, hands on the seat. Now!” She snapped her fingers. Without thinking my pants were down and I was over that chair and ready in an instant. Her soft cold hand caressed my bare skin and her finger traced the scars on my lower back and backside. *Smack* came the first hit which caused me to jump. I was taken back by how much I missed that hot stinging feeling. Several more swats came hard and quick loudly echoing off the room walls. I bit down on my lip with my fang doing my best to keep from crying out. As she continued to beat me, my necklace slipped out of my shirt and began to jingle like a bell. Unable to move my hands to stop it. Coming around to the front of me she snatched it from my neck.

“What is this? What have I said about religious trinkets in my home?” Maeve yelled at me as she shook it in my face.

“My deepest apologies, my Mistress. Old habits die hard.” I said sadly.

“Stand up. Shirt off. Now!”

“Yes Mistress.” I now stood there stark naked in front of Maeve. My hands instinctively went to my front for some modesty.

“Always the monk. We need to break you of some of these nasty habits you brought with you. Move your hands to your back. I wish to see all of you.”

Shyly I complied. My face flushed red with embarrassment. My eyes glued to the floor as her hands explored my body. I did all I could to quell the fire building inside me. If I could have bedded her then and there I would have.

“You may cover yourself again monk.” She giggled.

Not as soon as I moved my hands a scourge whip hit my back. “This is for wearing those trinkets in my presence. Understood?”

I nodded and she proceeded to whip my back and backside leaving deep welts. The more she thrashed me the more the lust grew inside me. It had been months since I had performed a confession and I guess my body was craving the pain. I was thankful I was able to cover myself with my hands shielding my hardness. Shame and excitement warred within me. The more pain I felt the warmer my body got. My skin began to turn a rosy pink. Maeve noticed my struggles and forced away my hands.

“Are you getting pleasure from this punishment? Hmmmmm, very, very, interesting. I have never seen it's like before. Is this part of your talents as a Confessional?”

“My humblest apologies, my Mistress. Please, I am so sorry. I can't help how my body reacts. It is all trained instinct now. I mean no disrespect. Please forgive.” I begged, dropping to my knees.

“Get up boy and stop your sniffling. I wish to look at you again.”

Quickly I rose to my feet and placed my hands again behind me. She reached down and stroked my cock, enjoying its size in her hand.”

“Mmmmmm, so very nice. I will be honest, little monk, back when I first encountered you back in that awful monastery, I never imagined this. Were you very sought out at the Abbey? If so, I can see why. My, my.” I froze. I had no idea how to answer her. Maeve saw the panic on my face and laughed out loud. I felt very small and extremely embarrassed at that moment. She caressed my cheek. “Now, now Nicholas. Don't be so modest. I gave you a great compliment. Perhaps one day I shall enjoy this. ”She said as she continued to stroke me. I was doing my damnedest to hold it together. “Someday soon I wish for you to tell me more about the Abbey and what exactly it was you did there. Because if I am correct in my assumptions, you were truly nothing more than a prostitute for men of the cloth. Am I not right? And if so, why so modest now? Are you not comfortable with your sexuality? And to have such self control under such fondling in one so young. To find pleasure in pain? I find it all fascinating and I wish to explore this more with you.”

“Yes Mistress.”

“You may dress now. You have done very well your first night as my new attendant. I think you will work out just fine. You have pleased me very much Nicholas. Go now and sleep well. I shall see you in the evening.”

“Yes Mistress.” I dressed hastily and left out of her room in a disheveled state. My face was flushed red with excitement and embarrassment. Standing in the hallway were several house servants snickering and chuckling as they saw me. I hung my head in shame and took off straight to my room. Any sexual excitement I had was gone and now replaced by frustration. Not only did I want Maeve even more now than ever, but now the whispers and rumors would get worse.

What the Heart Wants

Once I got back to my room I sat down on the edge of my bed and began to cry. The incident that just happened with Maeve made me crave for Pierre even more. I had to see him. I had to hear his voice, to feel his touch. The problem was I had no idea how to get back to the Abbey. I was strictly forbidden any contact or correspondence with any from the Abbey. As I pondered hard on this predicament I occurred to me I could perhaps write a note and give it to a clergyman from a church close by. Then again, it could backfire and they would bring it to Maeve or Demitri. Oh, what to do. I needed to let him know at least that I loved him still and missed him madly. That I had not abandoned him. Laying back on the bed, I closed my eyes and began to think of him and I together in each other's arms. The coolness of his vampiric skin against mine. The memory of his scent filled me with lustful thoughts. My hand slid down into my pants and I began to slowly rub myself. Soon I found myself lost in the feeling of self gratification. It was the first time I had ever done so. My breathing got quicker as I came close to completion. As I climaxed everything got cloudy and suddenly I found myself inside the Abbey down the hall from Pierre’s room. Stealthfully I snuck in and hid in the shadows quietly watching him sleep. Was I really there or was it just dreamwalking? Unsure, I crept over and kissed him softly on the lips. His eyes suddenly sprung open and his arms wrapped quickly around me. Holding me with all his might, “Is it you? Do I dare even believe you are truly in my arms? For I know I am not dreaming!” he cried. I honestly couldn’t answer him for I too was an emotional mess and held onto him for dear life. Pulling me away from him for only a moment he said, “It is you. How did you? I mean, where have you? Oh never mind all that right now, just hold me mon amour.” There we stayed in each other’s arms for about an hour not saying a word. I wasn't sure how long my visit would last since I wasn’t sure how I got there in the first place. I eventually found my voice, although I did not want to end this time with him I had to go. If It were found out I was gone, who knows what would happen to either of us. “I have missed you more than words can ever express. I have wanted to contact you but I have been strictly forbidden. Sebastian told me he came and told you.”

“So you honestly had absolutely nothing to do with your kidnapping?”

“I swear on my life Pierre I knew nothing of it. I am still confused as to why Sebastian never let me in on the plan. If I had known, I would have told you. Why would I have any reason to lie to you? About anything. I love you and I never ever wanted to be parted from you. These past few months have been close to unbearable. It’s as if I can’t breathe.” The sincerity was clear in my voice.

“I believe you Nicholas. I will be honest as well. I was sadly convinced you did. When I found your personal belongings gone, along with Simon or shall I say, Sebastian, well, what else was I supposed to think? And then the silence, no word from anyone. No ransom came. I was sick with worry. When he did come, all he said was you were safe. He refused to give me any more information nor bring back a letter from me. I resented him greatly for that.”

“Pierre, I do not want to leave you again, come back with me to the brothel. You will be treated well there. I can take care of you. Please, come with me. I can’t keep apart from you any longer.”

“But what of Lady Char? I am not sure I can leave her, not even for you. I don’t know. It’s all so sudden.” He said sadly. His words hurt, but I understood. She was his Sire and she loved him dearly and treated him like gold. I guess the sadness was evident on my face as he took me in his arms and hugged me tightly. I took his scent deep into my lungs. I never wanted to leave his arms again. Suddenly there was a loud knocking on the door. We both jumped and froze with fear as Brother Leo and Sebastian burst in, quickly closing and locking it behind them.

“Nicholas! What are you doing here? If any one were to find you it could bring a lot of trouble onto Brother Leo. How on earth did you do it?” Sebastian scolded me.

“I don’t feel comfortable going into the details of it, but once I focused on my memories of Pierre I found myself here down the hall from his room. I really don’t know how I did it.”

“Why did you not listen?” Sternly he asked.

Staring at them both my anger grew. “Who made this your decision? Either of you? Did you really think you could keep us apart?” I snapped at them trying not to raise my voice. I held onto Pierre even tighter.

Brother Leo’s face softened. “You are correct Nicholas, we should have consulted you. But know that not even Mother Superior knows of your current whereabouts, and I wish it to remain that way. The only people who are aware are myself, Demitri, Maeve, Sebastian and the elders.”

“I am so sorry Sire, we honestly meant no harm to either of you. It had all been done to keep you safe. This is a very delicate matter. You lead with your heart and not your mind when it comes to Pierre. You and I both know you would have never left here, not even if asked. You became too complacent.”

“After the third attack on the Abbey, it was felt among the elders you had to be removed. It was more than obvious you were his true target. As much as we did not want to lose our most prized Confessional, we feared more for our collective safety and yours as well from Bishop. A very secret deal was made between the elders, myself and Demitri for you to be brought to the brothel. Maeve was made aware of the deal afterwards and gave permission for the “kidnapping”. It would be the last place Bishop or his demented flock would look for you. None would ever think we would hide you with our ‘enemy’. He would never act against the Coven of the Children of Lilith. Not even with the power of the few ancients he has on his side would he be able to survive a direct attack. Just by the sheer number of members Maeve and Demitri’s coven possess, the Order of the Old Blood would be wiped out.” Brother Leo explained.

It all made logical sense. I could find no argument with any of it. But it still didn’t solve the issue of what was to happen to my relationship with Pierre. I stared at the floor as I could feel hot tears swelling in my eyes. Pierre put his arm around me and pulled me close.

“So, how do we right this as so Nicholas and I can resume our relationship? As you can clearly see you will not be able to keep us apart.” Pierre asked with a hint of bitterness in his voice. Brother Leo just looked at us in silence. He never prepared for the possibility I would defy Maeve’s strict wishes to stay away.

“Marry us.” Pierre suddenly piped up. I looked at him a bit stunned. “Marry us Brother Leo. You have that power as a man of God, don’t you? I wish to enter into Matelotag with my beloved Nicholas. Will you join me in a life together?” He asked, taking my hand in his.

“Yes! Yes Pierre! I would love nothing more than that!” I exclaimed.

“Nicholas, I love you so much and wish to never be parted from you again.”

“Please Brother Leo. Please, let me have this one bit of happiness. I have not run away from the brothel, I have all intentions to return. I just could not take one more minute away from Pierre. I have never felt this deeply for anyone, ever. Let me be happy Brother Leo.” I cried.

With a sigh and a kind smile he nodded, yes, looking at the two of us, so deeply in love. It was at that moment he knew that there was nothing anyone could do to keep us apart. After seeing all I had been through since I arrived in New Orleans. For over thirty five years I had been the pawn of others and I still seemed to find a little happiness in shitty circumstances. Yes, it was time to let me be happy. He agreed to perform a quick ceremony with Sebastian as our witness. Since it was all so spur of the moment, we did not exchange rings just then. But the vows still meant the same. Unfortunately we were unable to consummate our union that night as we did not want me found out. Kissing him deeply, I said my goodbye and Sebastian and I disappeared into the mist.

From that night forth, special arrangements were made so I could secretly meet up with Pierre. When we could not see each other we wrote love letters and little notes of endearment to one another. Now that I could be with him, life at the brothel became much more bearable. No one at the brothel was none the wiser of my sneaking away several mornings a week to be with my ‘mate”.

Moment of Weakness

After locking up and checking on the girls and overnight guests, I went to Maeve's room to attend to her needs. The routine over the past several months was I would help her undress, lay out her clothes for the next day and turn down her bed, brush out her hair, or rub her feet after a long night. But not this night. That summer evening the brothel had hosted a large party for the Coven of the Children of Lilith. It started off innocent enough with me undressing her. As I did so she began to gently caress my hand and arm as I removed each layer. I tried to politely smile it away as she had been drinking that evening. When I got down to her corset she pulled me to her and began to softly kiss my neck. A shot of energy made my knees go a little weak. I managed to compose myself and slipped my hands around her waist to untie her corset. She continued to kiss and caress me as I loosened it. Maeve let out an almost orgasmic sigh as it fell to the floor. Her hand slid up my back and to the nape of my neck. Grabbing my hair she made my knees buckle once again. Licking my throat she let out a small growl. “I want to taste you little monk.”

I could feel her bloodlust growing. A sexual energy was building between us I had never experienced before. Something within me began to stir. “I do not think this wise M'Lady. What will the others of the house think?” I said in a playful voice.

“Then take my confession, my little monk.” She snickered. Taking my hands she guided them to caress her hips and waist over her cotton chemise. I leaned in and kissed her shoulder, slowly kissing up her neck to just behind her ear which made her purr. A low growl escaped me not of my doing and she gave me a slight bite on the neck. “Trying to show dominance?” She giggled at me.
Worried I had overstepped my bounds I dropped my eyes from hers. “No my Mistress! I meant no disrespect. Sometimes my inner nature takes over my better judgment. I am still learning how to control it.” I said as apologetic and humble as I could. It wasn't like I could just blurt out I was also an incubus. She grabbed me by the hair pulling my head back to look at her. “No need to fear me pet. Do you think you can handle a woman such as myself?” She verbally teased me and began to unbutton my shirt. Sharp nails dragged over my chest enough to give pain but not draw blood. I enjoyed the pleasure in the pain when I was with her."I would like to see more." She demanded. Without hesitation I striped down nude and stood before her. Maeve's eyes lit up as she feasted what she saw before her. “I love how very fit and handsome you are.” Her hands caressed my body as she walked around me, looking me over. Stepping back she handed me the end of the ribbon holding the top of her chemise closed. Slowly she backed away, allowing the loose fitting fabric to slide off her to the floor revealing her beautiful voluptuous body. Her long, fiery red hair cascaded over her breasts, skin was smooth and white as porcelain. Grabbing her tight by the waist, I brought my lips to hers. Passionately we kissed, my hands slowly caressed her naked body, grasping at her breasts, fingers turning the nipples, slowly moving down her body, kissing and fondling as I continued. Now kneeling in front of her I pulled her even closer, my breath near her lovely mound. Her body shuddered. I slowly kiss her inner thighs, then to her hot wet lips. She moaned quietly in pleasure.
"Ah, I think I may have found a weakness." I whispered as I grabbed her ass and buried my face. She grabbed my hair and tried to pull me away as she felt the sexual energy rising from me into her giving her a feeling she had never felt before. It was almost overwhelming. She began to fight me but I was ready for her. She tried to pull away, but my grasp was strong. The more she moaned and tried to force me to stop only fueled this sexual fire growing inside. I concentrated on the inner energy and focused it to my fingertips. She shuddered as my hand slipped between her thighs. “Take me to my bed.” She ordered. In an instant I scooped her up in my arms and placed her gently on the bed. I was back between her thighs picking up where I left off. Maeve let out a surprised chuckle at my eagerness. My tongue darted in and out of her. She moaned and clawed at the covers on the bed from the pleasure of it all. Warm juices from within her flowed and I licked it up like honey. I slid one finger inside her releasing a shot of sexual energy into her. She let out a very loud moan and got louder as I moved my finger in and out of her. I continued probing her with my tongue. Sucking and licking at her hungrily. This continued on until I could feel an enormous sexual energy growing inside her. Letting my fingers run on the outside of her lips, twirling the clitoris between my fingers until the juices began to run down as my fingers sliding back and forth between her soaking wet lips. She squirmed wildly. Maeve grabbed me hard by the hair and pulled me on top of her. Looking me straight in the eyes she growled, “I want to feel you inside me NOW!” She reached down and found I was more than ready. Her eyes widened a bit in surprise and with a lustful smile she guided me between her legs. Just barely entering her, I teased her. The incubus had taken hold. I laid on top of her, with the head of my cock just barely inside of her. Kissing her neck, down to her breasts, taking her nipples into my mouth, twirling my tongue around them. She trembled with passion. Lustful moans and cries of ecstasy filled my ears and the room. Enjoying her lovely sounds I took my finger and started caressing the outside of her hot wet mound. As her breathing began to get quicker, I slowly penetrated her with a finger. A lustful cry filled the room. Removing my finger, I began to tease her with my cock again. Slowly I pushed the head into her. She cried out as I slowly pumped in and out of her. Overwhelming passion, lust and anger came out in her moans.“What is this you are doing to me? No one has ever made my body feel like this. It's so intense!”
“Because you have never had me.” I whispered seductively. She tried to get loose from my hold on her but it was no use. I held her tightly and sucked her nipples, teasing them with my tongue again, as I continued to play with her. In protest of my teasing, Maeve drug her nails down my back leaving deep bloody marks. Grabbing me by the hair, I took the pain and turned it to pleasure and began thrusting into her harder. I felt a flash of passion shoot through my core. Our bodies began to move in a rhythmic motion. My skin turned pink and warm to the touch as if running a fever. I could sense that she was close to climax. A lustful growl escaped me as I was thoroughly enjoying every moment in her arms totally lost in our passion. Moving my hips in small circles made her squirm. Quickening my pace I pumped harder and harder. Little animalistic grunts of pleasure escaped me as I felt the energy filled ecstasy flowing between us. Her hand suddenly shot up and grabbed my throat. She smiled and said, flashing her fangs at me, “You do not have permission to release your sexual tension as of yet. Is that understood?” Without lessening my pace I nodded I understood and instead let go of the built up sexual energy, letting it flow through into her. A faint glow came from my skin as our bodies rocked back and forth in mad passionate sex. She bucked wildly in my arms unleashing orgasm after orgasm as I continued to make love to her. Maeve buried her face in my neck and clamped down hard, feeding from me as her final throes of sexual pleasure left her body. Draining me of my strength. She released her grip on my throat and I fell back sleepily onto the feather pillows. Her lips a crimson red with my blood. She hungrily licked it away and pinned to the bed. A wicked look was in her eyes. I had never seen that look before. “Did I not please you? Did I hurt you?” I asked worriedly.
“Who do you belong to?” She asked seductively. “I belong to you. I am your humble loyal servant to do as you wish my beloved Mistress. I am yours, body, heart and soul. Your pleasure is my will.” I answered sheepishly.

“Good, now put your hands above your head and do not move them. Is that clear?” Swallowing back the pride I was just feeling and I did as instructed. Our eyes locked as she grabbed on to my still hard cock. Her fingers played with the shaft as her tongue flicked at the head teasing me. I closed my eyes and moaned as she took it into her mouth. A grunt of lust left me. I had never felt this kind of pleasure before. Not ever from Pierre. Perhaps it was because I had not performed as a Confessional in several months. The incubus inside me fed on sexual energy and I had been denied release since my arrival at the brothel. Her hand reached out and dragged her nails down my chest, the sting of it drawing me ever closer to cumming. She laughed and licked the blood from my chest and climbed on top of me. She lowered herself onto me and began to slowly ride me. My hips fell into rhythm with hers as we made love again. She reached down and grabbed my hair forcing my head back, exposing my throat. All the while never losing her rhythm. Letting go of one of my wrists, Maeve slid her hand around my throat turning my face from hers. I felt sharp teeth tearing at the nape of my neck. I grunted and struggled as it felt like she was ripping off the skin in tiny bits. She held fast as the lust and pain grew inside me. The more I struggled, the more she fed and nibbled. The pain adding to the pleasure was becoming unbearable. My body began to feel as if it were on fire. I pumped hard letting inner instinct take over. I could feel myself getting lost in the emotion of it all. The pain turned to ecstasy as she fed and bounced herself quicker. I grabbed her shoulders and forced her from my neck. Blood dripped from her chin onto my chest. She looked more youthful than before. Wiping it away she looked down at me and said only one word, “release” A golden flash of light enveloped us as I released inside her. I held onto her tightly as I fell into a slight trance like state. She let me lay in her arms as she caressed my hair. We laid there for some time before she spoke. “You have pleased and pleasured me greatly this evening Nicholas. I must say I was very surprised at how talented you are in bed. Did you learn these things as a Confessional?”

“Yes. I have been trained in all facets of giving pleasure for both men and women. We don’t just cater to the male clergy. I was actually the only male Confessional. I came to discover quickly that it all comes to me very naturally. Although, the way I just felt has never happened to me before. Not even with my love Pierre. You seemed to have coaxed it from me. I have never wanted to pleasure someone as much as I wanted to pleasure you my Mistress.” And I wasn't lying. “Ever since we first met back at the monastery I have wanted you. I apologize for such crude thoughts. I mean not to offend.” Sitting up slowly, sheepishly I asked, “Does this mean I have to work the floor now as well?”

“No! What would you give you an idea like that?” She asked, a bit shocked.

“From the other servants here. Some are convinced because of my young looks I would be a perfect molly. They all know of my station back at the Abbey. Plus, if I may be able to speak freely, it isn't unheard of for the Madam of the house to test new possible working girls and mollies?”

“Well don't listen to their nonsense and their gossip. Yes, it is true, that I do take some to my bed, but not all. And I promise you my love, you will never have to work the floor. You are much too precious to me. You were the one to liberate me from that hellish imprisonment.” She answered with a smile and kissed me on the forehead.

The following evening went on as usual although things seemed slightly off between Maeve and I. She acted as if the night before never happened even though the whole house seemed to have found out since I could hear their thoughts and gossiping whispers. I didn't think it was something to bring it up and thought to myself I must have crossed boundaries with her. Shame filled my heart as I tended to her in silence. She kissed me gently on the forehead as I left her for the early morning. When I went into my room I noticed a small box with a ribbon on it. Attached to the ribbon was a small card which said, “Mine” on it. Opening it, there was a beautiful gemstone on a leather throng. It possessed different shades of blues and purples within it, almost like colors of twilight. I knew it was from Maeve. My heart actually skipped a beat with giddy excitement. I knew this now meant I was off limits to all but her. It was not unheard of for some of the clients to come in and pay top dollar to sleep with one of the servants due to their race or beauty, but I was strictly off limits. This made the other servants very unhappy. They felt it was very unfair that someone so new to the brothel was getting such favoritism. None knew of the truth about the connection between Maeve, Demitri and myself. In turn I was given a nickname, the Madam's, “bet kay montay”. It meant “pet monk” in Creole. I was far from pleased about that and did my best to ignore them, but very happy not to have to sleep with vampires or any other clientele. My days of being a sexual toy for them was far behind me.

Protection or Protocol

Shortly after my night of passion with Maeve I began to have problems with my health. My inherent magickal abilities were becoming uncontrollable again. But this time was different. It was like energy was being pulled from me but at the same time I couldn't dispel the growing energy inside me. After early mornings of passion with Pierre, it left me feeling as if I would explode from all the pent up magickal energy at times. It hurt so bad that I would cut myself thinking if I bled it would relive the pain. It only left me feeling weak. Even with feeding from Sebastian once in a while it still felt like a magical ward of sorts was upon me. This had been going on for almost a year now.

Also the whispered rumors amongst the servants about the bet kay montay of Maeve's continued to swirl through the brothel and made their way back to me. From the time of my arrival the servants of the house had it out for me. None of them ever spoke to me and looked at me as if I was some sort of demon. They always took a wide berth when walking past me. I couldn't for the life of me figure out why they despised me so much.

I confided in Sebastian about what was going on with my health. Up to that time I was able to cover it well, but each night left me more spent than the last. After a bit of stealthy detective work, he was able to find out that the brothel itself is magically warded. It is done so to the outside world it looks like an ordinary brothel. Humans don't see the beauty inside these walls the way we did. They couldn't see the shimmering wallpaper. Or notice the shine in our eyes in the candlelight. This answer was somewhat acceptable to me, but I could feel inside me there was something more, and someone had to know the answer. Even when I tried to read the minds of the silent servants I couldn't any longer. Whatever was binding me was also preventing me from using my basic vampire abilities. It was making it harder for me to see Pierre on the sligh.

I tried talking to Maeve about what I could do to make things better with the servants and she brushed it off as nothing more than their jealousy towards me. Not many arrive here and within weeks becomes a favorite of the house Madam. But they also did not free her from an impending lifetime of imprisonment. Perhaps others felt they should have been her Page. But that was for her to decide, not theirs and they should mind the house and not her business. Then I tried to approach Kryimsson several times about it, but he would just slyly change the subject. By late June of 1777 I wasn't going to let him walk away without telling me the truth any longer. Something deep down told me that he knew what was happening. My body was so tired and the energy I had trapped inside had become too painful to block out. After searching the brothel, I found him walking in the zen garden. When he saw me approach him I think he knew I was in a fowl mood. “Nicholas? You look a bit aggravated. What's wrong?”

“I've been hearing whispers amongst the servants. First off I really don't like them discussing my business and second I want to know now who has bound me here.” I said to him.

“I'm not sure even how to tell you.” He answered sadly.

“What do you mean? What's wrong Kryimsson?”

“I don't think it would be wise for you to know.”

“Oh really? Well it isn't you who constantly feels like shit. You're not the one who has so much trapped magickal energy that the pain of it blinds every thought. I have no relief, not even after feeding from Sebastian. I need to know now tell me!” I yelled at him. I could feel my anger growing as I balled my hands into a fist.

He gently took hold of my arms and with a huge sad sigh he said, “It was Maeve.”

Taking a step back from him I whispered in shock. “No.”

“It was Maeve. I'm so sorry.” He pointed to the gem hanging around my neck. I couldn't believe what I just heard. I stood there stunned for a few moments. So the night of passion we shared was nothing more than a way to get close to me. Too feel out what type of strength I really had both as a vampire and magically. I felt devastated, used. I tore the necklace from my neck. My strength rushed back like a red hot wave over me. Rage quickly swelled inside and took over. Suddenly I was no longer myself or in control. I darted from the garden quicker than Kryimsson could catch me, straight to Maeve's private room. Something had taken over my body and I could do nothing but obey. I charged through the door and locked it behind me. She jumped in her chair at her desk as Kryimsson pounded on the door. “Nicholas, don't do anything stupid. Open the door!” He yelled.

I stood silent, glaring at her enraged as she stared at me in shock.

“What's the meaning of this? How dare you barge in here!”

“How could you do that to me?! You left me defenseless! You played me for a fool and used my feelings for you against me. I yelled at her throwing the necklace at her feet.

“Mind your place boy! And watch your tone with me!” She said grabbing her snake whip. I refused to back away from her as she came towards me flicking it. I stood my ground. She snapped pointing to the floor and flicked the whip at me again expecting me to act like an obedient dog. This gesture only fueled my anger more.

“Mind my place? That's all I have done for the past year since I was brought here! What if Bishop came here to retrieve his “weapon”? Or the Abbey wants to reclaim their Confessional? How am I supposed to protect you if I can't protect myself? Usstan tlun naut dosst personal lince'sa!” (I am not your personal pet!) I am not your bet kay montay! I screamed at her.

Anger flashed in her eyes as she went to whip me. I ducked away grabbing the snake heads and ripped the whip from her grasp as they bit deep into my hand. I fed on the pain smiling at her menacingly. I threw the whip down and she gasped as I licked the blood from my hand as my eyes stalked her. I saw red. Maybe she really was no different than what Bishop said. What if she was really like the rest of them a voice inside my head spoke. The rage grew inside me and against my better judgment, I charged her. She tried to dodge but I caught her by the waist and tossed her on the bed, pinning her down. She fought back hard, punching and scratching my face. Part of me wanted to take her and the other wanted to kill her. Blind rage had taken total control. She let out a scream as Kryimsson pounded harder against the door with Demitri helping as well now. I looked down at her with a wicked, maniacal smile as I sunk my teeth into her beautiful pale neck. Gods, how sweet her blood was. I had forgotten how sweet fae blood tasted. But there was something more to it. It was euphoric. I fed enough from her to stop her struggling. I pulled back slightly, licking the blood from my lips and fangs as it ran down my chin. She stared up at me infuriated. My eyes still blazing red as I laughed at her. I was not used to being at full strength as a vampire or how to control those conflicting urges. And with how her sweet fae blood coursing through me I was out of control.

“Naut jivvin tluin pholor l'byr xuz d'nauxxizz zhah ol ?” (Not fun being on the other end of helplessness is it?) I hissed.

I heard a crash behind me, then felt Kryimsson and Demitri pulling me off Maeve. They grabbed my arms and slammed me hard to the floor knocking the air out of me. The blood was making me feel dizzy and I felt drunk. I fought them hard to get loose.

“Nicholas stop.” Kryimsson yelled at me.

“Kryimsson control him!”

“I'm trying! I have never seen him act like this before!” He snapped at her while he struggled to get a hold of me. He punched me hard a few times in the face. All it did was infuriate me even more. I spit the blood from my mouth at him and I laughed wickedly. Now with no patience left for my out of control behavior, angered he punched me square in the chest knocking the air out of me again. I laid there gasping to catch my breath and cursing at him in Svartálfar. He finally was able to pin me to the floor and they both fed from me enough to take the fight out of me. Demitri stood dumbfounded along with Sebastian who had heard the commotion. Maeve tied my hands and feet. I continued yelling in Svartálfar at the both of them as Kryimsson lifted me up and threw me over his shoulder, taking me from her room and carrying me to the dungeon.

“Why would you do that to me? What did I do wrong to deserve that? Answer me!” I yelled. I was thrown into one of the small cells. Kryimsson stood over me and just shook his head. “Boy are you in trouble. You really need to learn to control that anger and rage.”

“Well maybe if you were a better Sire I wouldn't be here in the first place! Maybe if you weren't such a coward and traded your freedom for my life with your Uncle I would be anywhere but here!!” I yelled as I kicked out at him. He slapped me hard across the face.

“How dare you call me that! I would never do such a thing! I never betrayed my sister nor my family! Don’t speak of things you have no understanding of! You have some nerve boy!”

He shook his head looking down at me with a crushed look on his face. I stood up the best I could and with all my strength broke the rope holding my hands. Kryimsson quickly ducked out the door and locked it behind him. We had battled once before and he wished to never do so again. Not that he feared losing, but he never wanted to raise a sword against a brother and friend. I untied my ankles and charged at the door slamming all my weight against it over and over again, “Let me out! I swear I will get you both for this! Let me out of here! Let me out!” I screamed at him through the door.

“You will stay here until you calm down, child.” Kryimsson said in a stern, but tired voice.

“I am NOT a child!” I screamed out in anger. I paced that cell for hours seething. The anger would not subside. I tried several spells to escape but the room was magickally warded. It felt like the rage inside me was a beast trying to escape. It was taking over and I began to punch the wall until my knuckles bled. I think I may have even broken my hand but the pain overtook the rage. The more pain I felt the calmer I became. The rage finally subsided. Exhausted, I sat against the wall and watched the sunset through a small window. Sadly the realization of where I was, was really my own fault. I had lost all control and there was no excuse for it. I was still really angry she warded me. Because if she could do it, so could someone else. I sat and thought about the dreams I had of Fenya and the Valkyrie and what they said to me. I needed help. It was time to learn to trust. I was no good to myself nor Pierre with me acting out like this. The next morning I awoke to Kryimsson sitting across from me. I sat up and leaned my back against the wall. I really didn't know what to say to him. I was still angry but it wasn't really at him. It was the circumstances I had put myself in.

“Are we calmer now?”

“I guess.”

“What happened there?” He asked, pointing at my arm. My hand had healed but I hadn't noticed the considerable amount of dried blood on my sleeve. Embarrassed about what I did to calm myself I shook my head and acted like I didn't know.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean what I said to you yesterday.” I said ashamed.

“I know you didn't. But I’m not the one you need to be concerned about right now. We shall talk another time. You realize you are in a world of hurt, right? You attacked Maeve. Even I can't help you with this one. You've got one thing going for you though. At least that episode you had with her didn't happen during business hours.” He said sadly.

I knew I had to go and make amends with Maeve. I wasn't sure how to even begin to tell her how sorry I was for attacking her. All I could do was hang my head in shame. “I don't know why I attacked her like that. I was just so mad. Something took over and before I knew it you and Demitri were pulling me away from her. I know now that it was not the right way to handle the situation.”

“I know for a long while now you have looked to me for certain answers that I never gave you. I'm sorry for not being more honest with you about things. I come from a time where the less someone knew you or about you the safer you were. Maeve is the same way. We never kept things from you to punish you or put you in harm's way. We were trying to protect you.”

“Protect me from what? Have I ever given reason to not trust me?”

“To protect you from yourself lad. You have great power within you and we both know, as we witnessed yesterday, you can not control.”

I sat and digested what I just heard. I was a bit angry at what he just said but I also now understood a whole lot better as to why all the secrets.

“Perhaps it was done to see if you could be trusted. Let's be honest, she really doesn't know much about you other than you woke them as revenge towards Bishop. Am I correct?”

“You are correct. Kryimsson what am I going to do? I really fucked up bad this time.” I sighed.

“I don't know kiddo, I don't know.” He answered and patted me on the shoulder.

He led me back to Maeve's room. I was still dressed in a blood covered shirt. A combination of hers and mine. Gods I felt like the biggest piece of crap and hung my head low as he opened the door and motioned for me to enter. I swallowed back my fear and the training beaten into me became instinct. I walked over to her, my eyes to the floor. The door locked behind me. Dropping to my knees before her I bowed and showered her feet with kisses. I felt the ruffle of her skirt and her hand grab me hard by the scruff of the neck. Without a word she pulled my head back, exposing my throat. I shuddered as she sank her fangs in, drinking from me until I was almost unconscious. She slapped me hard across the face as she hissed at me, “I will teach you to never attack me again you insolent CHILD!” Maeve dragged me by the scruff over towards the wall and pulled on a book on the shelf. Suddenly the wall moved away which led to a dark corridor leading to another room. It was a smaller version of the dungeon in the basement. My heart skipped a beat as she dragged me by the collar of my shirt and stood me up, chest against the wall. She took my hands and tied them with thorny rope above my head. The thorns ate into my skin as I struggled to stay standing, the blood trickled down my arms. A cloth was tied across my mouth. Another across my eyes. “If I hear one sound from you I will take you down to the dungeon and feed you to the fiends. I will let them have their way with you. Perhaps leave you down there and forget about you. Or maybe I will deliver you to Bishops doorstep myself. So you better be silent! Is that understood?”

Weakly I nodded “yes”. I knew she was serious about the threat and I was going to pay and pay dearly. I deserved every bit of what was coming to me. She didn't even bother to remove my shirt. She was gonna beat it to shreds along with my flesh. I tried to prepare myself the best I could. The first hit from the scorpion whip bit in deep. I wanted to scream out but was able to hold back. As she continued to beat me I fell back on what I would do when I received beatings like this while receiving a confession, I fed on it as I focused on something to take my mind from the pain. My body became slightly relaxed and Maeve noticed. She knew what I was trying to do and proceeded to hit even harder, throwing in a few spells to intensify the pain on top of it all. This broke my concentration and a grunt escaped me. Once she was done whipping my back raw, she said coldly, “Since you insist on behaving like a child I will beat you like one!” Ripping my trousers down exposing my backside she beat me with a switch until I bled. That had to be the most humiliating beating I ever took in my life. I felt my face flush red with embarrassment. I tried to bury my face in my arms to hide my humiliation. She saw my reaction and laughed, “Ah, I found something that gets through that thick Svartálfar head of yours. I have to treat you like a child! This is the punishment children get when they misbehave. Shall put you over my knee! You are nothing but a petulant child to me. An unruly disappointment! We should have let you rot in that Abbey! Hiding you from Bishop is not worth this kind of aggravation to me.”

Her words cut me worse than the whipping I was taking. Something deep inside me wanted to die then and there. Tears began streaming from my eyes soaking the blindfold, but I still did not dare make a sound. She beat my backside a bit longer driving her point home even more. Maeve pulled my trousers back up and spun me around to face her, twisting the rope tighter around my wrists. The smell of sweet fae blood filled the room. What was left of my shirt was ripped off and the sickening sound of the switch whistled through the air as it struck me. The first hit made me wince up, pulling my elbows in trying to shield my chest from another strike.

Grabbing me by the throat she growled, “Don't you dare try to shield yourself!” She ripped the blindfold from my eyes. “I want to see the humiliation in your eyes. I want to see your suffering. You will NEVER touch me like that again! No man has ever handled me in that manner and lived. I will be damned if I will ever let a mere boy do so!” I couldn't bring myself to look at her. I was so ashamed for what I had done I knew I deserved this. “Look at me!” She growled as she stared me in the eyes. The switch ate into my chest leaving bloody cuts across it. Something deep inside me began to fight its way out and it terrified me. I knew I wasn't going to be able to hold back much longer. The mental and physical stress was all coming to a head. Everything that I had held back emotionally felt like it was about to explode out of me. All the while my eyes never left hers as I shook my head back and forth 'no' to try to get her to stop hitting me. I began to shake uncontrollably and I bit into my bottom lip and dug my fingernails into the palms of my hands to try to distract myself from exploding. Soon more tears escaped and there was no way to stop it once it started. I wasn't crying from pain. It was all the emotions I had held back for so long. Emotions from back when I was held by Rhavan. Emotions pent from my time at the Abbey. My heart ached for Pierre. All the tortures I had endured in prison. All the fear I silently lived with on a daily basis that Bishop and his rogue vampires would come do what he threatened. Sobs wracked my chest but I still made no sound. Suddenly the look on Maeve's face went from rage to concern. I tried to turn myself from her. She stopped me, removed the gag and released my hands. I collapsed to the floor at her feet in a bloody heap. I stayed huddled on the floor in front of her shaking and silently sobbing. It felt like my soul was ripping from me. I wanted it to stop and the more I tried the harder the sobs wracked my chest. Maeve took me in her arms and cradled me as I had an emotional breakdown. It totally overtook any physical pain I felt. I had never cried so hard in my entire life. The shaking only got worse as I began to have trouble breathing. She held me tighter.

“Please Mistress, please no more, I can't take it. I'm so sorry for what I did to you. Please forgive me. I can't describe the shame I feel right now. I never wanted to hurt you. I was just so angry about being left so helpless. I never meant to hurt you. Everything got out of my control so fast. Like I was trapped inside myself and could only watch. I'm so sorry. Oh God, the things everyone will say now. Demitri will hate me now and so will you. Oh, I am so very sorry. I don't blame you if you wish to send me back to the Abbey. I don't deserve to be here any longer.” I sobbed, still unable to look at her in the eyes. She took my face in her hand and spoke to me in a soft soothing voice. “Your punishment is over. You took a hard beating and learned a harsh lesson. Now try to relax, you must control your breathing.” She said kissing my face and caressing my hair.

“I am so sorry I am a disappointment to you. I try, I do. I try so hard to be good. Sometimes I lose control.”

“Oh, my dearest, you are far from a disappointment to me. I am the one who is sorry. I shouldn't say things like that out of anger. It isn't right. I didn't want to beat you like this. I take no pleasure in it.”

“What's happening to me? Why can't I stop crying? God why is this happening to me. This must be my punishment from the Lord for being so weak. I can't take it anymore.” I yelled out. “Make this stop I can't take this. I feel like I'm being torn apart.” I begged her.

“You are having a purging of sorts. Because of your race you are not taught about feelings other than hate, revenge and anger. What you are feeling is foreign to you. You also have been taught nothing but how to fight and defend yourself. The other part is from holding all the pain you took at the Abbey as a Confessional deep inside. It was bound to come out sooner or later. You need to deal with your past. You need to learn to deal with it in order to move one. In order to control the magickal energy you have, you must control your emotions. Not until then will you truly understand your full potential. That means you have to talk about it. All of it.”

“I..... I can't”. Shame swelled inside me.

“Nicholas, how about we start from the beginning. Who is your real Sire? I know it's not Kryimsson. It's not his scent you carry. Rumor is it’s my youngest brother, Rhavan. Is this true?”

I looked at her with pleading eyes. I had no clue that I carried a scent. I didn't know if I could tell her, much less, anyone else what I had been through. Not even Sebastian knew all of it. I felt that coming clean about who my real Sire was could bring me more punishment. She stared at me, drawing my eyes to hers. I could feel her pulling at my mind. “So, it is true, Rhavan was your Sire.” She said, shocked, taking my face in her hands, wiping away my tears. “Oh Nicholas, you poor thing. I am so, so sorry. It all makes sense now. I would have never disciplined you in the way I have if I had known the truth. You are from the Svartálfaheimr and I treated you as such. I had only heard whispers and rumors of what happened to you at the hands of Rhavan. I am so sorry.”

“That's not all, I did something very, very bad. But I didn't know it was wrong until well after. Rhavan never taught any of his fledglings the rules of being a vampire. He was our end all be all. He fed from us, clothed us, took us when he wanted.” I stammered through my tears.

“Nicholas, what is it? It can't be that bad.”

I struggled to get a hold of myself. Finally after a few minutes I was able to calm myself enough to speak. “I killed someone I shouldn't have.”

“Who did you kill?”

“I can't tell you. It could put all of you in danger.”

“You don't have a choice now, you started this. You will tell me.” She said staring deep into my eyes again. I tried not to answer but she was able to pull it from my lips. Looking her straight in the eyes I said, “Everyone wants to know what happened to their precious Rhavan. I know where he is. I know what happened to him. He is dead. Killed by one of his damned children. I'm the one... who... killed Rhavan.” Maeve grabbed me and held me close to her. I have to say I was a bit shocked at this reaction from her. “I didn't have a choice.” My voice trailed off as the pain of the beating was starting to get to me.

“I understand. But there are those who will not. We will do all we can to protect you. I promise. That's all I wanted to do from the start when I agreed to let you come here.” She sighed.

If this information ever got out it would put all in the brothel in harms way. She was taking a big risk keeping my secret. I gently pushed myself back from Maeve. She looked at me confused. I looked slightly downward towards my wounds on my chest. She let me go gently. I hung my head low. I had questions I needed answered but I didn't know how to ask. It didn't seem the proper time. But I needed to know why she warded me and how. I think she saw the look on my face and asked, “What is it Nicholas?”

“Why did you leave me defenseless?”

She sat quiet for a few moments. She got to her feet and crossed the room and sat in a chair. She motioned for me to sit at her feet. Painfully I complied. It took all I had to just get to my feet. My back and chest screamed in pain and my whole body ached. I slowly lowered myself to my knees because there was no way I could sit. I kept my eyes focused on the floor. “Look at me,” Maeve took my face in her hand again, bringing me to look at her in the eyes and spoke, “When we first woke, not in a million years did I ever think I'd wake up seeing a ghost. You look so much like your father even with how thin and sickly you looked. But after tasting more of your blood I knew who you were. I saw some of your memories. Some good, some bad, some very heartbreaking. When you defied Bishop and woke us for good, allowing our escape, I knew he would never let any of us go. Even more so with how successful the Coven of the Children of Lilith has become. He wants his revenge and will go to any lengths to get it. My mother the Countess was the same way. So stuck in the old archaic ways. Once I knew exactly who you were I thought keeping you warded would be easier to keep you safe than not. Even more so after you snuck away and married Pierre. I know of your morning visits to meet him. Knowing this I had to ensure your safety. We could not risk you being caught. Now I understand that it was a horrible thing to do to you. But then again, if you were honest with me from the very start perhaps none of this would have ever happened. So, from this day forth you are free to see Pierre as you wish, but not under any circumstance are you allowed contact with anyone else from the Abbey. I strictly forbid it, Understood? ”

I nodded that I understood. She was right. I should have been honest from the start, but then again I had no clue who she was at the time or what her intentions were. She allowed me to rest my head on her lap. She stroked my hair as she continued, “When I was a child the O’Mannan clan had ties to several dark elven clans. One of them being the de Loppendell’s. Your father, Kryimsson and I played together when our clans got together to talk politics. His mother, Queen Ellenoira showered him with all her love and attention as he was her only living son at that point. His elder sisters did not care for it and convinced their mother to marry him off to the Tazbbar’s for political gain. I cared for your father dearly and promised him before he married that I would watch over any male heir born and protect you. Since you have been here in my home I have grown to care very deeply for you. I think I have fallen in love with you Nicholas. That is why after our first night together I could not allow myself to fall even deeper in love with you and we have not slept together since. We are going to do everything in our power to protect you from Bishop and all who wish to harm you.”

My heart skipped a beat when she confessed her feelings for me. What about Demitri? Had something happened between them? I felt love for her as well, but I was unsure if I was in love with her. Pierre had a tight hold on my heart at that time in my life. Confusing feelings swam through my being.

“I need to know something else that has been troubling me. Why do you refer to Kryimsson as your Sire when clearly it was Rhavan.” She asked.

“No! Rhavan was never my Sire! He may have embraced me but the things he did are unspeakable. I still have nightmares. So terrifying at times they seem almost real. Kryimsson is my true Sire. He had been the one who had protected me the best he could and taught me almost all I know about being at sea and the world. He never taught me the rules of any coven, we kind of never really spoke about our vampirism. It was just a thing we both had in common, along with having the connection to Rhavan. I had great difficulty coming to terms with it. He's my best friend, my mentor, my brother. We have gone through hell and back together at Rhavan's hands. I owe him my life many times over. I missed him greatly. It made my heart ache. After our ship went down off the coast of the Caribbean, he disappeared. I had no clue if he was even alive.” I said sadly. Suddenly I just wanted to go back to my room. I wasn't feeling well and felt like I was going to burst into tears again at any moment. I felt like such a child. The room began to spin slightly. I think she noticed because she caught me before I fell back. “Are you ok?” She asked, concerned.

“I'm not feeling very well. Everything is starting to spin around me. I think I need to lay down.”

She brought me back to my room through the secret passages behind all of the rooms so as to not alarm the others in the house who may be on the second floor. Kryimsson and Sebastian were waiting in my room and gasped when they saw the condition I was in.

“What did you do to him?!?” Kryimsson yelled at Maeve.

“You know exactly what I did and why! Don't question my methods in my own house!” she yelled back.

“There are beatings and then there are BEATINGS! I think you went a bit overboard.” Sebastian piped in quietly. He helped me lay down on my bed. It was difficult, I couldn't lay on my back because of the open wounds and extremely sore backside. So I sort of half laid on my side and stomach. I was shaking pretty badly from the breakdown I was still having. And even though I wasn't really crying anymore the tears still fell. Sebastian was worried. He had never seen me in this condition before. I silently begged him to feed me. It was all I could think of to help the feelings I was having go away.

“Don't you dare feed him.” She scolded him.

“Why not?” He snapped back at her.

“He is being punished. And he needs to ride through this emotional purge or we will have a repeat of what happened. Perhaps he will attack you next time! Do you want that for him or you? He needs to go through this.”

Kryimsson looked down at me sadly. He knew what Maeve said was right. I reluctantly understood as well. I also didn't want them to fight. Maeve sighed and walked out of my room motioning for him to follow her. He gave me a weary smile, patted me gently on the shoulder and walked out, closing the door behind him. I could hear their conversation through the door. I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop on them, I just have really good hearing.

“He needs a Quickening and you know I can't do it. He also needs to be brought into the Coven. We have to protect him from something you should have stopped. How could you stand back and allow him to kill Rhavan? He was our brother, even if he was evil incarnate, he still deserved a trial. That was not for you and you alone to decide. Even if you were his Sire, you had no right. What a mess Kryimsson. If Bishop thinks the same, that Nicholas... if they get to him before a trial happens, he may not survive. We have to find him...” her voice trailed off as they walked away down the hall. What the heck was a 'Quickening' and what trial? I tried to not let my mind go to extremes and calm myself down with Sebastian's help who had also left the room briefly to gather bandages and ointment for my wounds. He gently cleaned up the lacerations and patched me up the best he could. Afterward I laid there silently with my head on his lap, staring out the window. Tears still fell as I struggled to deal with all that I was feeling. He held my hand gently and tried to speak some words of encouragement I knew he meant well, but all I really wanted was to be left alone. I was not allowed to see Pierre for several weeks as punishment. It was the longest two weeks ever.

Word spread quickly through the house of what I had done. This made my life even harder now with the servants and working girls who would spit at me in the halls when no one else was around. They would curse me under their breaths for attacking their Mistress. I always walked past them with my head hung low. I did my best after to avoid everyone as much as I could outside of daily duties for Maeve. Yep, life was pretty miserable inside the brothel and I had only myself to blame. My only solace was Pierre. The only temporary escape I had. I was thankful that my union with him was accepted and supported by Maeve. It made it less stressful not having to sneak around to see my mate. Pierre was not pleased with my behavior as well and we began a much stricter Master/submissive routine to help me work through my feelings. It helped balance me since I was no longer a Confessional. The incubus needed to be fed pleasure as I needed to feed from the pain and blood. Being a Confessional allowed for both sides to feed and feed well. Once at the brothel it all ceased in an instant. The random sexual encounters did nothing to nourish me. It was only a matter of time before I lost all control.

My Sweet Irish Lass

I was allowed to sleep with any of the women who worked at the brothel I chose with Pierre and Maeve’s permission. The incubus part of me needed to feed on lust just as much as a vampire did blood. This was the part of myself I had the hardest time accepting. I would purposely deny myself sex because the guilt I felt. Like I was betraying Pierre, even though I had his full permission. There were few of the girls who still acknowledged my presence and seemed to find me irresistible. Being an incubus had its advantages. Hey, I am in no way complaining. For a guy my age it was pretty great. The truth of it was I was so in love with Pierre, no one caught my attention. But, there was one I clicked with right away and wanted to get to know better, and she wasn't one of our working girls. She was a chambermaid. One of the extreme few servants of the house who actually spoke to me. Her name was Katherine “Katie” Siobhan Kent. She was born 1767 in County Cork, Lambs Head, Ireland and arrived to work at the brothel around January of 1784. Her family sold her into indentured servitude to save them from starving. She had long metallic red curly hair which she wore in braids. The biggest, brightest, emerald green eyes I had ever seen. Her accent just got me every time she spoke. I loved when she said my name. We looked to be about the same in age, seventeen, and had a lot of fun hanging out together when we weren’t doing chores. There was something about her that reminded me a little of Fenya. I think it was her smile. The same, caring, loving warmhearted smile. She was another person I felt I could safely confine in. We could tell each other anything. Not many at the brothel knew about mine and Pierre's marriage, but she knew and was very accepting of it.

I began to have very strong feelings for her which I had to confide in Pierre about. There were no secrets between us. But I didn’t know how to approach the subject or do so without hurting his feelings or making him think I want to leave him. I found myself quickly, deeply, head over heels in love with Katie as deeply as I was for Pierre. I was utterly confused. It finally came to a head one early morning after one of our BDSM sessions. Knowing me better than anyone he could tell that something had been eating away at me for some time.

“Nicholas, on your knees in front of me now.” He pointed sternly to the floor. I scurried over and did as instructed. Sudden anxiety gripped my chest as I thought I had disappointed him in some way. Keeping my eyes to the floor I asked, “Have I done something to anger you Maître?”

“No, no, no, my precious you did very well today. You pleasured and pleased me greatly. But I can sense something is troubling you. I am your mate and it would be wrong of me not to notice when you are in turmoil. Confess to me Nicholas, what has you so troubled?”

Tears instantly swelled and I buried my face in my hands. How do I tell him? What do I say?

I felt such guilt I couldn’t look him in the eyes. He bent down and took me in his arms, cradling me.

“Please tell mon amour, What has you like this? Have I done something to upset you?”

“Pierre, my love, my mate, my Maître, I love you so very, very, much. I would give my life for you. I would walk the earth to find you if we ever became separated. But I find myself drawn to another. A young woman at the brothel. She is a chambermaid from Ireland and she is one of the very few at the brothel who actually talks to me. We became quick friends and when she says my name, I can’t explain it. It just makes me.” Cutting myself off before I fawned over her too much I hung my head in shame. “I feel so guilty for feeling this way. I am betraying our love for one another. I am so confused. Please, believe me when I say I will never leave you of my own doing. Like when I was taken from here. You heard from my own lips I would not have left. I swear it on all that is Holy I love you. How do I stop feeling this way?”

“You don’t, ma chere petite. You keep loving her. Just as I love my dearest Madam Char. Is that what had you so distraught? Oh my silly boy, hahaaahaahaaaaa.”

For the life of me I could not figure out what he found so funny. He took my hand and led me to the bed. Patting the spot next to him, I sat. All I could do was stare at the floor. Pierre continued to chuckle at my dismay.

“Nicholas, mon amour, it is natural to feel attraction for women as well as men. There is no rule book that says you must love one sex or the other. I know what this church tries to ‘preach’ but we both know it isn’t so. While working as a Confessional you have slept with nuns as well and have never had any issues performing to their highest expectations. Haven’t you already had a first love? Fenya was her name, correct? But the love you have for me is much different than that. And the love you feel for Madam Maeve is different than what you feel for me. And the love you have for your Irish lovely, is different than all of those, correct?” Pierre smiled and kissed me lovingly on the forehead.

All I could do was nod in agreement. He wasn’t wrong about any of it. But it still didn’t help the strangling guilt.

“Look at me beloved. It’s alright. It really is. I will love you no less if you decide to pursue this love you have at the brothel. I give you my full blessing.”

I think all I could do was hug him with joy at the time. I had no words to describe the immense happiness I felt at that moment. Later that morning, I headed back to the brothel and began courting Katie that day. With her it felt more like a pure love, less lust. I knew Katie felt the same for me. My relationship with Pierre was full of sex and hot passion. Pleasure and pain. With Katie, it was more “normal”. We would kiss and hold hands but never had sex. It was a wholesome love. I have no other words to describe it. I loved her as much as I loved Pierre.

When I was finished attending Maeve, I would help Katie clean clients rooms and we would just talk about everything. Hopes, dreams, fears. Things we liked and didn't. We would walk in the garden behind the brothel and look at the stars. On Sundays I would take her to early morning Mass. Sitting together in the pews of the St. Louis Cathedral singing hymns and listening to the sermon. I never felt more at peace than when I was with her. I created a beautiful little flower garden for her at the back corner of the brothel like the ones I would build back at the monastery. I was able to trade for some plants and flowers from her native homeland from some of the Irish immigrants in town. She cried when she saw it. Never had someone been so kind to her, she said. I doted on her hand and foot when I was not attending Maeve or with beloved Pierre. She was the sunshine in my world. I was so happy when I was with her. I showered her with jewelry and trinkets I bought with the money I made working as Maeve's attendant.

Everything seemed to be going good between us, or so I thought. It began in early June when Katie began acting strangely towards me. She became short with me and would push me aside when I would try to comfort her. I couldn't figure out for the life of me what I could have done to upset her. I tried to talk to Kryimsson about it and his answer was pretty much, “Women, who can figure them out”.

I had just left Maeve for the evening when I ran into Katie waiting for me in the hallway. She was usually fast asleep by the time I got done with my duties. She looked very upset and her arms were crossed. “Did you sleep with Madame?” She asked a bit loudly, showing her Irish temper. I looked around quickly to see no one had heard her. Grabbing her by the arm gently, I brought her back to my room.

“What are you talking about?”

“Gabriel told me about the love affair you are having with Madame. That it's been going on for years. I was very accepting of your union with Pierre, but Madam too? It’s too much Nicholas for me to handle. How could you drag me along all this time while carrying on with Madam. I am such a fool to fall for your vampiric charms.” She cried into her hands.

I stood staring at her dumbfounded. That lying little devil. I know he only said that to hurt Katie because she always turned down his advances. Jealous dick. Taking her face in my hands, wiping away her tears I said sincerely, “Katie my beloved, please don't listen to him. The servants here have always had it in for me. I swear to God I am not having an affair with Madame. Our relationship is not like that. What have I done to make you believe such lies about me?”

“Have you slept with Madame?” She was insistent.

“Yes, only once though. And that was shortly after my arrival here. Many years ago. I am her humble servant. Nothing more”

“Why have you not taken me to your bed? Am I not to your liking in that way? Some say you only like men. Since you are married to Pierre, why would I believe differently?” She questioned me with deep sadness in her voice.

“Oh my darling love, Katie. I love you more than any woman I have ever known.” I said taking her in my arms.

“How many women have you lain with?” She asked with a tone of anger mixed with jealousy.

“Honestly not many. Perhaps three? All before going to prison mind you and before I...”

She suddenly cut me off, “Why do you lie to me about sleeping with the Madame? I have seen you leave her room sweaty and your clothes in a disheveled state. You are an ex man of the cloth and yet you lie to me. I have heard what you used to do at the Abbey with men. It's no different than what those trollops do here at the brothel. What of Pierre whom you are having a love affair with. I was told of how you mourned and missed him once you arrived here. Is it you really don't like women? You can't love me if you lie to me.” She cried.

“Katie, please my beloved, no tears.” I wiped them from her cheeks. I took a deep breath. “The Madam has certain needs that she only trusts me with. In turn I receive 'discipline' from her. There are things that I had become accustomed to that, for some, would find extreme or taboo. It's due to my training as a Confessional back at the Abbey of St. Francis. Madame Maeve is understanding of those needs. I receive no sexual gratification from any of it. As for Pierre, yes, I am in love with him. Deeply in love. He taught me how to love and how to enjoy pleasure without guilt. My race doesn't express emotions well. We are not bred for love. Just war and servitude. Katie my love, my heart. I would love nothing more than to lay with you. But I also respect you as a Catholic and keeping pure until marriage. I try my best to be a good man in God's eyes but at times I slip. With you I want to do things right. Don't you want to save yourself for marriage?”

“I do. I mean, I did. Oh, I don't know. All I know is that just the thought of you with someone else kills me inside. I want you and only you. Nicholas I want to give myself to you. I am so in love with you. I think of you day and night. Take me my beautiful vampire love. Take me as yours.” She said, throwing her arms around me and showering me with kisses. I wanted to have her, to take her in my arms and lay her down then and there. But I feared what the incubus part of me could do to her. I had never slept with a human since my sexual awakening. I was terrified I might harm her. It was time for me to be honest. “I need to tell you something about who and what I really am. Please understand, I didn't keep it from you on purpose. I just don't think much about it. At times I forget that I am not human.”

“What do you mean you aren't human? I thought vampires were humans.” She exclaimed, a bit shocked.

“Oh, for the most part they are all humans. But there are very, and I do me very, few that are not. I am a Svartálfar, a dark elf. See my ears? The scars of where the tips used to be? My maker’s concubine sliced them off. Basically, I'm an elf who has vampiric traits. I drink blood at times, but only from Sebastian because my body rejects human blood. Brother Leo, a monk from the monastery I was at, also discovered that I have a demon of sorts that lives within me called an incubus. It thrives on sexual energy as a vampire does blood.”

Katie stared at me in amazement. I could tell she wasn't scared from what I just confessed, just absorbing it all. She suddenly flung her arms around me and hugged me tightly. “Oh Nicholas, you really are in love with me! I am so happy! I was very scared you didn't want me.”

“In all truthfulness I have never slept with a human female since my sexual awakening, which brought forth the incubus within me. I don't want to harm you. Soon, my beloved we will make love. I promise. Soon.”

A few days after my conversation with Katie I had to talk to someone. I desperately needed advice. I figured Maeve was my best chance at getting real answers.

“I know others have tried to poison her against me. They spread nasty rumors of us having an affair. It is no secret the staff here hates me. Always calling me your bet kay montay. It's tiring my Lady.” I said sadly.

“The relationship you have with Katie is a rare romance. We try our best not to become enamored with the living. Humans are delicate creatures. Her time here will be but a blink of an eye in your lifespan. She may have her own doubts about being with you and perhaps using others as the excuse? You will outlive her by a millennia. Does she know that she will remain childless with you? For vampires can not produce living seed. Perhaps that is not the life she wants. Have you considered that?” Maeve said in a somber voice.

The answers I got were nothing I had expected. I had never thought of it that way before. That really wasn't a life I wanted to give her. Noticing the sadness on my face, she hugged me. “Don't worry young one. There is plenty of time for love. You have Pierre. Be content with him.”

The conversation left me pretty depressed. I walked through the rest of my day like a sad zombie. Katie asked me numerous times what was bothering me. I didn't know how to answer her. I loved her so very much and wanted a life with her as well but I also didn't want to watch her grow old before my eyes. To keep her barren for her whole life. It wouldn't be fair. I guess Katie got tired of my distance and cornered in my room one night before the brothel opened. “I want to know why you have been avoiding me since we had our talk. Did I say something wrong? Was I too pushy? Oh my, that's it. I came on too strong.”

“No, no, no, my love. It's me. It's my fault. I have had a lot on my mind. Are you sure you really want to be with me? Me, a vampire demon elf?” I questioned her sadly.

“Why would you think I would judge you for what you are or your past? You are a child of God are you not my love? God made this earth. He made me, and creatures like you. God does not make mistakes. We are all made of his image. I love you for you and never have I ever held your past against you.”

“Perhaps. I don't know.” Hanging my head low. Tears suddenly flooded my eyes.

“Please beloved. I do understand what chances I take being with you. I know you will outlive me, but I do not want to spend my life with anyone but you.”

“I can't give you children. My seed... it's...it's...”

“Oh my beloved Nicholas, it's not all about having wee ones. I can live without us having our own children. There are plenty of unwanted babies we can adopt if we choose. I know what I am asking of you. Love me Nicholas as I love you. Don't ever leave me. I want to spend the rest of my days on God's green earth with you. Only you. I am as sure of this as I live and breathe” She said cheerfully as she wiped the tears from my face. I picked her up in my arms and held her tightly. I would never let her go. My mind was made up. We were going to spend the rest of her life together.

The Initiation

Something was happening within the coven because there were lots of vampires I had never seen before arriving at the brothel for an extended stay. They had been holding meetings once a month over the past year, but never had there been this many here at once. It made me very uneasy. Random attacks between the covens had begun again in New Orleans. Some demanded to go back to the old ways in which the covens had been run centuries before with Bishop’s rag-tag group of monks leading them. The Order of the Old Blood were very against vampires being seen mingling freely with humans and still believed all were out to destroy them. They hated that vampires now owned homes and businesses and attended Universities. The Order of the Old Blood waged war against all the new start-up covens that tried to flourish in the Crescent City. They also saw the Coven of the Children of Lilith being their greatest enemy. But this was the New World, and a new way of doing things. The newer covens also looked at humans as more than just food. They were our friends, some even became our protectors. With the thousands of refugees from Europe coming into New Orleans it meant a greater demand for “food”. To solve this problem, Irish men, women and children, like my Katie, were sent here to serve as indentured servants every month along with the poor African slaves. Most were purchased by the old Coven leaders prior to them ever hitting shore. Never to be seen from again. Those who proved worthy were spared only to end up as pets to these creatures. The real lucky ones made it onto plantations and worked for humans. There is nothing “lucky” about slavery, but working for humans was a much better life than being food and pets for vampires.

It was a sunny warm spring day in late June of 1784. The day began no different than any other. Got to spend an amazing morning in the arms of Pierre then I went on about my chores as usual. Helped Katie change the bedding out in some of the guest room and had an early supper together. Afterwards I headed back to my room for a quick nap before the evening work began. There was a note from Maeve on my bed atop some clothing that had been laid out for me. A new white shirt, royal blue trousers with matching vest and long surcoat. It read that the brothel would be closed for the evening to outside guests and she wished for me to wear the outfit before me. I was to stay in my room until Sebastian would come and get me when I was needed. I went, cleaned up and dressed. I waited nervously for Sebastian to come get me as the note instructed. It felt like forever, but eventually he came. He was dressed in fine clothing like me. I wanted to question him as to why he was also dressed up but I couldn't find my voice all of a sudden. Something was up as he led me deep, down through the tunnels to where the coven held their meetings. I had never been down here and my nerves were almost shot by the time we reached the room.

“Relax, it's going to be okay. I promise. No harm is going to come to us here.” He said patting me on the back, trying to calm me. I tried to ask a question but nothing came out as I entered the room to see about twenty-five vampires staring back at me. A few chuckled at the wide-eyed look of shock on my face. I heard a few comments of, “He’s just a mere boy,” “beautiful” and “young” as I walked over to Maeve.

“My, you look more handsome than I even imagined. That color looks wonderful on you. Brings out the blue in your eyes. ” She beamed with delight.

“What's going on? Why am I here? Are Sebastian and I in trouble?” I asked in a shaky voice.

“They are here for a most joyous and special occasion. Tonight we are bringing you into the Coven. You and your fledgling.” All I could do was look at her in shock. I was terrified thinking back to my ‘initiation’ into Rhavan’s coven. I shuddered as a chill went through my body.

Demitri approached me, taking my hand in his. “We will be starting momentarily. Nicholas. Please relax. It's all going to be fine.”

I couldn't help but stare as he gracefully walked away to greet other guests. I was grateful he had forgiven me all those years ago when I attacked Maeve. I think I had a harder time forgiving myself than they did. I shook it off and turned my attention to Maeve. She looked ravishing. I could feel my lust for her rise. It was wrong of me to feel that way as for I was with Katie, but then again, it was Maeve and she held a special place in my heart. I was in love with her as well. She was dressed in a tight black velvet dress that was low cut in the front exposing her ample cleavage. It was very hard keeping my composure with her and she knew it. Absolutely lovingly tormenting me. She held my hand and would throw me little lustful glances and a shot of sexual energy would zap through me.

Within an hour of my arrival the ceremony began. Sebastian stood next to me as Kryimsson stood on my other side. His hand resting on my shoulder. Demitri motioned to them that it was time. Sebastian was summoned forward first. I followed him to the center of the room and we were told to stand in the middle of a large pentagram that was etched into the stone floor. I did my best to keep calm. I didn't want to disappoint Maeve and Kryimsson.

Maeve lifted my chin and said, “Stand proud little one. Eyes straight ahead. There is nothing to fear. Trust me, trust us.” I did as she said and took a few deep breaths to try to relax myself. “You must be honest at all times. No matter how difficult. Do you understand?” She continued. We nodded that we understood. I couldn't find my voice. I looked at them all nervously. These were some of the most powerful vampires on earth surrounding me, starring me down with distrust. I was confused why they felt this way towards me. They had never met me before. I could feel none of them wanted this to happen.

“It was requested that this lost vampire and his fledgling be brought into the Coven of the Children of Lilith”

Fear began to creep into me. I looked at Kryimsson and he gave me a stern look. The low rumbling of voices continued.

“Now children of the night, what do you seek from this Coven you wish to join?” Demitri asked.

“We seek your protection and guidance.” Sebastian piped up for me. I stood frozen with fear. My mind was racing a mile a minute about all sorts of horrible ways this was going to go.

“From whom do you seek protection?” Demitri asked.

“A Coven we have angered.”

“And what did you do to anger this coven?” An Elder spoke up.

Demitri saw the distress I was in. “It's okay son, you can speak freely and honestly here. No harm will come to you. I promise.” He smiled.

Sebastian put his arm around my shoulder and gave a squeeze. “You have to do this Nicholas. It will help free the hold of fear you have of your past.”

He was right. I had to do this. It was now or never. Taking a deep breath I said, “We are both former monks of the Order of Cain before it fell due to Bishop O'Mannan's excommunication.” It was coming out in a near whisper. “I am the one who woke Demitri Faust and Maeve O'Mannan from their imprisoned slumber. While at the monastery Bishop routinely tormented his flock and once kidnapped me from the Abbey of St. Francis. Due to his actions, he was banished by his own coven. To this day he is greatly angered by it and has vowed revenge. He has been silent for several years now, but the fear is still there. ”

The whispers got louder as I stood before their judgment. I couldn't understand why I felt such fear. I never felt it before. I would rage, and be on the defensive in situations like this. Not this time. I stood before them all, bearing my soul to these creatures. A tall, older female vampire with long white hair to almost her feet rose and asked, “Is this the Confessional you gave refuge to? The demon elf child that Rhavan has searched for all these years? He truly exist? I would have never believed it if I wasn’t seeing him with my own eyes. All of us outside of the Coven of Cain thought he was touched. But, here you are, in the flesh. Do you taste as sweet as they say? She asked, licking her fangs. I swallowed back my visible fear as she laughed at me.

“Who is your Sire boy!” Suddenly a man yelled at me.

“He has the Damned ones' scent on him! How dare you bring him here!” Another woman yelled. A low rumble echoed through the room. The strange pressure in the room felt even heavier. I looked at Sebastian paralyzed. His hand reached out and took mine, he gave it a quick squeeze to let me know it would be okay.

“Have faith.” He whispered to me. But he too had fear in his eyes. It was the same look he had after we woke Maeve and Demitri.

“Hush old woman!” Demitri snapped at her. The room began to spin slightly. The powerful energy that surrounded me was stronger than I had ever felt before. I should have fed, I should have lain with Pierre. I did not have the energy to protect myself. It was almost suffocating.

“Is this true? Your Sire was Rhavan Albrecht?” Another man asked sternly.

“Yes. Rhavan is my maker.” I answered solemnly.

“Why does Bishop O'Mannan believe you took your Sire's life? Did you kill that abomination Albrecht?” The tall older woman with long white hair asked.

“A fledgling of his brought his journals to the monastery after his death but was unable to say what happened. He died shortly after his arrival. I was told I was the last thing he wrote about before he died.”

“That didn't answer the question boy!” The old woman snapped at me. I could feel my legs shaking.

“ Are you the one responsible for Rhavan's death?” Demitri turned his focus on me.

“Why is this line of questioning necessary. He has come to us for protection, not a trial.” Kryimsson spoke up. The anger was evident in his voice.

“Yes, it is, and you have no room to talk Kryimsson. You are involved in this as much as those two are.” Maeve said.

I didn’t want them to argue. I had to tell the truth or I would never be free of it. Gathering my courage it left my lips. “I am.” I said loudly as my face showed no expression now. A collective gasp echoed in the chamber. Demitri looked down at me a little puzzled that I showed no remorse for killing my maker. Although it was no secret what a horrible monster he was, rules were still rules.

“Are you not bothered by the law in which you have broken? Does it not frighten you that not only does the Coven of Cain have the right to rid this earth of you and your fledgling, so do we?”

All eyes in the chamber were on me. I no longer felt fearful of them. Something clicked inside my brain and I found strength within myself and proudly I stood my ground on why I killed Rhavan.

“I did the world a favor by ridding him from it. He was cruel, a deviant who did unspeakable things to those he called his children. I lived in fear everyday of my life. I expect one of these days either Tama, Bishop O'Mannan or any of the other vile renegade vampires will collect the bounty which lays upon my head. But I will not go down quietly or alone. I promise I will take them all down with me when that time comes.”

“We call for a trial!” A few of them shouted.

Demitri looked down at me and said. “Due to the severity of the crime you have committed I have no choice but to obey their request.”

“Demitri, please, don't make him go through this. We are supposed to be protecting them, not feeding them to the wolves!” Kryimsson begged.

I looked at Maeve and Kryimsson for help. They both looked back at me saddened. There was nothing they could do. Law was law.

“What do I do?” I asked, swallowing back the fear.

“Tell them the truth my boy. All of it.” Kryimsson said.

“All of it? I...I can't. I can't talk about 'that'.”

“You no longer have that choice. If you don't they will kill you on the spot. And I can't save you or Sebastian.”

I looked at the crowd of them and said, “What is it you want from me?”

“What did the 'Damned One' do to you to make you kill him?” An elder male vampire demanded.

“I, I can't do this.” I whispered.

“You can and you will if you want to live.” He snapped at me.

“Please, there has to be another way.” I pleaded with them.

“Talk or die!” They shouted.

Maeve took my hand in hers and I took a deep breath, I swallowed back the swelling fear and asked, “What do you want to know?”

“Tell them what he did to you. To us at the castle” Kryimsson spoke up.

“In the winter of 1711 a vampire and his concubine saved me from being executed by my family for a murder I didn't commit. That vampire was Rhavan Albrecht. The very first night with him he beat and....took me.”

“What do you mean by 'took you'?” Some woman snapped.

“He had his way with me. He, he, raped me. He did so in front of his female fledgling.” I answered softly.

“Was this a common thing between you both?”

“If you are asking if he sexually abused and raped me on a regular basis, the answer is yes. He would beat me almost to death then experiment on me to see how I healed. He would lock me away in a coffin for days, sometimes weeks at a time.” Anger began to swell inside me.

“What was your final breaking point boy?” Demitri asked sternly.

“When Rhavan requested I kill Kryimsson. He had kidnapped us both off the coast of the Caribbean. I had been beaten, raped and starved for months on end. Eventually he was able to break my spirit. That night will stay with me until my time has ended on earth. The night he held a grand ball and let members of the Coven of Cain take me in front of Kryimsson. My mind snapped. I was held there in his castle for weeks until he got tired of having his way with me. He brainwashed me into the loyal obedient fledgling he always wished me to be. Six months later he would hold another grand ball. This time it was to show off how I was now completely his. At the end of the night he wanted to give me a reward. He brought a broken man before me and told me I must kill him to prove my love and loyalty to him and the coven. At first I didn't recognize Kryimsson. I fought him, and fought him well. But Kryimsson also knew all my weaknesses and used them against me to take me down. He was able to break through my memory and I suddenly realized what was happening. Enraged, I attacked Rhavan. Killing him by cutting off his head. Then I burned the castle and all in it to the ground. Several years later while at sea, our ship sank separating Kryimsson and I. I sat in Marshalsea prison in England until 1740 when I was sent here to New Orleans to the monastery. There the former Cardinal Bishop O’Mannan made my life a living hell. There were only two people there I could count on. Elder Brother Leonardo O'Mannan and my friend Sebastian Littlefoot.” A hush fell throughout the chamber. Tears were now rolling down my cheeks as I was baring my soul before a chamber full of complete strangers. Sebastian reached out and put his hand on my shoulder. “The Coven of Cain believes I am a weapon of sorts. They want to use me in a war against you, the Coven of the Children of Lilith. I do not want to be a weapon. I don't want to be part of any war. I saw too much death back in the Svartálfaheimr at my own hands and at sea as a pirate. I have tried very hard to live a peaceful life since I came to New Orleans. I tried to be a man of the cloth. I worked as a Confessional to help protect innocent people from lecherous vampiric priests. Please I beg you all have mercy. And if I still must pay for the horrendous deed I have done, punish me. Do not take it out on Sebastian. This happened years and years before I ever was to meet him.” I cried.

I pulled no theatrics this time. I had just bared my soul to these creatures and now our lives were in their hands. I looked back towards Kryimsson and he gave me a halfhearted smile. Maeve reached over and held onto my hand trying to reassure me everything would be alright. After what felt like forever the oldest looking male elder spoke up.

“Taken into consideration the facts now from rumor. We too have heard of the legendary 'weapon' they were said to have had. Meeting you today and hearing your story, I could feel your aura was honest. I feel that the young man has told us the truth. Rhavan Albrecht was an abomination from the start. We also request that Kryimsson Giddeon be reinstated into the coven and made officially this young fledgling Nicholas's guardian and Sire. All in favor?”

Everyone in the room agreed with what the gentleman said. Demitri stepped in front of me and handed me a chalice with a dark liquid in it. “Drink. It will help you relax.” I took the chalice and did as told. As did Sebastian. It quickly began to work. Little did I know it would relax me to the point I felt like I was doped up on opium, but it wasn't.

“What do you have to offer this coven in return for our protection?” Demitri asked.

“We pledge our blood, our loyalty and our life. We pledge to follow all the rules of the Coven of the Children of Lilith without wavering.” Sebastian and I said together.

“You swear to give yourself fully to this coven? Blood and body alike? To wear the mark of Lilith proudly.”

Without hesitation we answered, “yes.”

“Even with the horrors you have endured at other vampires' hands you are still willing to give yourself over fully, to us?”

“Yes. we do. Without hesitation.”

Demitri approached me with a very decorative stiletto in his hand. Maeve stood next to him with a large chalice. I was handed the knife and was instructed to slice across my wrist letting my blood pour into a chalice. I did just as I would do to give blood back at the monastery. I made the cut and let it trickle in. I handed the stiletto to Sebastian and he did the same. After the cup was filled, Kryimsson then grabbed me and sank his fangs deep into my throat as did Sebastian drinking until I was almost bled dry. I was gently laid down on the pentagram carved on the floor. My shirt was unbuttoned and Maeve wrote something on my chest with blood from the chalice she held. It felt like it was burning into my skin. I weakly grunted in pain as she drank the blood from the chalice then handed it off to the nearest vampire to her. One by one they drank, and one by one they all began to turn youthful again. As they all watched each other turn younger my worth to the Coven of the Children of Lilith became clear to them. I just became their “Fountain of Youth''. All I could do was lay there and hope this would all end quickly. Horrible memories of Rhavan's brood taking be flashed as darkness filled the edges of my mind and vision. Demitri slit his wrist and mixed it in the chalice as did all in the circle, letting their blood intermingle. Kryimsson then bent down next to me, taking me up in his arms and sunk his fangs into my neck, draining my remaining blood. I could feel my heartbeat slowing. I wasn't afraid. I embraced the oncoming darkness as he laid me back down on the floor. My body began to stiffen as my heart slowed to a faint beat. I was unable to move. It felt as though my soul wanted to escape.

“Kryimsson, do you pledge your loyalty and life to the Coven of the Children of Lilith? To follow all rules and laws within this coven?” Demitri asked

“I do and will.”

“Will you pledge your life and loyalty to young fledgling Nicholas as his Sire. To guide him in all ways of being a vampire. To teach him the rules and laws that must be followed by all of us.” Maeve demanded.

“Yes, I swear to do all that is required of me. I will not falter this time.”

Demitri nodded to Kryimsson and he pulled me up to allow my head to rest on his chest. The large chalice was now full of ancient and fae blood. Placing it to my lips I was told, “Drink. Drink all of it.”

A strange sensation within me took over my body. An overwhelming thirst drove me and I swallowed every last drop. My body began to feel as though fire was running through my veins. I writhed in agony on the floor as they all began to chant. I reached out to Kryimsson for help. He took my hand and told me to ride it through. That it would all be over soon. It felt as though something inside me was trying to escape, it was definitely trying to leave my body. Almost like out of self preservation. This was worse than the Drider ceremony! But I held fast, I would not let it go. As the mixed blood coursed through my veins a bluish light began to surround me. My body began to float upwards towards the ceiling. The chanting got louder as I felt myself growing stronger. Stronger than I had ever felt before. Suddenly it felt as though my back was tearing apart. I wailed out in utter agony. A collective gasp filled the room as huge black wings appeared behind me. My eyes were almost translucent, and my skin had turned whiter than a ghost. The blue light got brighter and brighter around me until it burst from my chest in a beam of light, hitting the far wall and filling the room. All dropped to the floor and clung to each other in fear. All but two, enrobed in black. A large mysterious figure came towards me. Removing the fabric from their face emerged a beautiful angelic man with white tight curly hair and the bluest eyes I'd ever seen. Wings of gray feathers spayed out behind him. He was guarding a tall woman with black wavy hair that fell around her body and dragged on the floor like a robe. Hair blacker than the darkest night. Her eyes were also black but shone like stars. She was dressed in a long tight gauze dress of blood red that clung tightly to her frame. She reached out to me to come to her. I floated down flapping the wings ever so slightly like it was second nature. Kneeling before her she caressed my face and smiled. Looking at the room of vampires she began to speak.

“My children, how I have waited for this day. I have slept the great sleep for thousands of years waiting for one to wake me from that slumber. The young one they call Nicholas Taylor, born Nienar Rideau de Loppendell-Tazbbár, you are the perfect embodiment of myself, Lilith, the Archangel Samael and Cain. With you, there will now be balance. You will bring the wars between the covens. With you, my children, we will all finally live in peace. Within you Svartálfar child carry the power of the ancient ones, fae royal blood, plus the blood of angels and demons. You along with my lovely great-grandchildren Maeve and Kryimsson, will bring the balance. You were never the pawn of the Svartálfaheimr, humans or the vampire world. You are their savior.” One by one they stood in stunned awe.

“Stand tall my child, show them all your glory.” I stood and turned towards them. Tears of blood streamed down my face. I was terrified at what was happening to me but at the same time I had to trust all would turn out okay. My back still ached terribly from the weight of the wings. I looked down at my ghostly white skin and back at Kryimsson. He could only look back at me in shock. I turned to Maeve and Demitri, they too could only stare. Sebastian, seeing my distress, ran to me. He held me tight in his arms. “It's going to be alright Nicholas, don't fight it. Allow it to become one with you. The pain will stop. You will see. Trust in yourself. You have the power. You always have.”

My mind raced with questions, but I could not speak. And the visions. Such amazing visions flashing through like today's movies in my mind. Holding my throbbing head, they kept coming and coming. Visions of the beginning of man. Lilith wandering the earth, alone. I saw black winged angels copulating with human women. Flashes of wars. Floods. Earthquakes. Death. Bright light clearing to mountains. Darkness. Everything began to spin. I was beginning to feel nauseous. It was from the human blood in the chalice. No matter how ancient, it was still human. At the moment I didn't care. I was more concerned with not getting ill in front of everyone.

Lilith spoke in a whispered tongue that none could understand other than myself as she took me in her arms again. Her voice seemed to float through the room like a gentle breeze. “The young shape-shifter speaks the truth Nienar, child of Svartálfar royalty, gifted at birth the powers of the earth. Nicholas, child of the vampire blood, the incubus monk. Please, do not fear what is happening to you. This will all fade in time. You will look like yourself once again. Only you decide when your wings shall expose themselves. With the right guidance you will learn to harness these new gifts quickly. Seek them out. But beware young one. Do not abuse this power given to you. Never abuse it. For it and you can be easily banished from this earth if I choose it.”

Turning to the rest in the room she said, “All of you have witnessed the rebirth of this blessed child born to our bloodline. Be well my children, for I am so very proud of your progress and the coven you have become in my name. My blessed Maeve and Kryimsson, he is your charge now. You must teach him how to use and control his new gifts. I must leave you now. I must go back to my slumber.”

As she left, the blue light dissipated as well. The wings from my back faded and my eyes went back to their normal color of blue, just slightly lighter, more iridescent. My skin remained ghostly white. Everyone was still staring at me.

“Did you know that was going to happen?” Demitri questioned Maeve still in amazed shock at what he had just witnessed. “Kryimsson, you?” The two of them could only shake their heads 'no'. The others, the elder vampires of the coven began to whisper among themselves. Frantic whispers. Fearful whispers. I could hear them clearly. I felt crushed by their sudden distrust of me.

“Our savior?”

“ What is that supposed to mean? What if he tries to take over?”

“ He is one of the damned ones after all. He could destroy us all, what does he care? If he could kill Rhavan without a shred of remorse, what would stop him?”

I am guessing Maeve did as well, “HUSH! All of you! He carries Rhavan’s blood which is the same as mine and Kryimsson. He was our younger brother, remember that. How dare you question him, or what we all just saw. Shame on all of you! He gifted you his blood and it made you young and strong once again. He carries the blood of our Mother, our creator! She appeared before all of us! We are the chosen true children of Lilith. We must do all we can to help mold, and educate Nicholas in our ways and in magick. The witches of our coven, I call upon you to help him learn about the new power within him. How to tame and wield it when needed. Elders of our coven, show him your gifts, teach him how to use them to protect us and others. Teach him self preservation. Most of all, we must love him. Love him as we would deeply love any of our own kin.”

“We must swear an oath, here and now, to forever protect Nicholas. To tell all what we saw here. That Lilith has not abandoned her children. She has preserved us. The Coven of the Children of Lilith is the chosen coven to lead. We will bring our kind into a new era. One of advancement, and education. Of living seamlessly with the humans and perhaps other-kin as well. It is what we have fought and lost so many of our kind over. The time of killing each other is done.” Demitri rallied. The others cheered and agreed, putting their fears about me behind them for the time being.

All I could do was sit there in a silent stupor. I was so confused as to what the hell was going on. Kryimsson finally found his voice and came over to check on me. “Nicholas? Are, are you alright? How do you feel?” He asked, shaking me gently.

“I feel strange.” Was all I could come up with. Everything that just happened was extremely overwhelming. The nausea rushed back. “What's happening to me?”

“As Lilith said, you are going through some changes, but it will pass. You will be fine.” He said patting me on the back.

“I think I'm going to be sick. The human blood. I really don't feel so good. It's all been very overwhelming. I don't want to be rude, but I really would like to go back to my room.”

Kryimsson motioned for Maeve to come over. “He's not looking so good. He says he feels sick.”

“If you need to go lay down then please my love, go take care of yourself. We are done here anyway. You both are members of the coven. Everything is going to be alright now. Sebastian, could you come help Nicholas to his room. He has had quite a night.”

Sebastian helped me up off the floor and let me steady myself against him. I smiled and thanked all for believing in us and accepting us into the coven. As soon as we left the chamber I got violently ill. He grabbed me up in his arms and brought me to my room. There Katie was waiting for us. She was worried about what was going on too because of the amount of vampires at the brothel. Sebastian told her all of what transpired as we were indoctrinated into the coven. She caressed my arm as she looked at the color of my skin.

“Do you still want me now? Knowing I can sprout wings like a demon?” I asked, dejected.

“Angels have wings too my love. And you are my angel.” She said kissing me deeply.

On My Knees

It had been two months since I transformed into my new self. I had still been dealing with strong side effects of the blood I had drunk. The constant inner struggle to keep the energy contained within me was like rage building inside me although I had no anger. Katie did her best to help me but in time she began to distance herself from me. She would shy away from my touch. Our walks in the garden became fewer and fewer. No one from the brothel spoke to me. Not even Remmy or Minerva. I was so thankful that Pierre had not abandoned me nor had Sebastian, Maeve, Kryimsson and Demitri. They all tried their best to help and understand, but in all reality, I think they all feared me a bit. All of them had seen me break at one time or another and every time it was never pretty.

It all finally got to me after one particularly rough night at the brothel. We had a bit of an issue with some drunken humans, and I had to remove myself from the situation in fear I might harm one of them. I was in such despair when Sebastian found me crying in the garden I created for Katie. My face buried in my hands.

“What's wrong Nicholas?”

“I need to go see Brother Leo. I think he is the only one who can help me.” I sobbed as I looked at him. My face stained with blood tears. “Look at me!' I yelled as I showed him my blood covered palms. “No one here knows how to help me. The elders with all their vast knowledge have done nothing to help me. They refuse to even see me. They fear me. They believe I want to take over. I don’t want anything more than to live as normal of a life I can. Why is that so hard for people to believe?”

“I am so sorry Nicholas. I wish there was something more I could do to help you. You are correct that we do not know how to help, but we all love you so very much and see you are suffering. Maeve is utterly frustrated with the elders and their sudden distrust in you. She thinks there is a snake in the grass so to speak here at the brothel. Kryimsson feels so as well. But you are already pushing things, being married to Pierre in secret and sneaking behind Mother Superiors back to see each other. She is extremely angry with our coven because we stole you away from the Abbey. The last thing she will be willing to do would let us see Brother Leo.”

“I must try Sebastian. I have too. This is not living. This is torture. Katie won't even come near me. All here are frightened of me. I wish I had never drank the blood. It's all too much for me to handle. Perhaps he can make me an elixir? Something. Anything!” I was losing it, bad. “I can go speak to Mother Superior. She has no malice towards me. I know she will listen and let Brother Leo help me. Lilith herself told me to seek out help. That it would not find me. And it is clearly obvious, I will not get it here. or from the Coven of the Children of Lilith.”

“Nicholas! You can't. It's been strictly forbidden!” Sebastian pleaded with me. I knew then I was on my own. After the brothel shut down for the evening, I went about my nightly chores as usual. I helped Maeve undress for the night and she settled in for her daytime slumber. I fed from Sebastian earlier in the evening which put me at full strength. Once all had gone to sleep I quietly left the brothel and tried out my new gift of flight. Removing my shirt first, I thought hard about the wings and the pain of them tearing through my flesh became reality. Shaking off the searing ache in my back I focused my mind and called out to Brother Leo. I told him to meet me in the Abbey garden. I let the wings flutter a few times before I took to the air. The feeling was amazing. The most freeing feeling I had ever felt in my life. In a matter of minutes I was hovering above the Abbey garden looking down upon Brother Leo who was pacing, waiting for me. Slowly I ascended down behind him. Clearing my throat caught his attention. He spun around and saw me standing before him in my new form. He staggered back away from me in fear. I reached out to him to show him I meant him no harm. “Please do not fear me dear Brother Leo. I am not here to harm anyone. I desperately seek your help, and none seem to be able to help me. But I know you can help me. You always have the answers.” I begged him as tears of blood slipped down my cheeks. His eyes grew wide. His hand reached out as if it was of its own will and touched the blood on my face.

“What's happened to you Nicholas? Who? What have they done to you? The wings! Your eyes!” He cried out in horror.

“Help me Brother Leo. I need to learn how to control this. It is taking over my life. The hunger I have for lust is worse than any thirst I have ever had for blood. Even sleeping with Pierre longer sates me. I crave more. I am thankful I can not drink human blood for I fear what type of murderous rampage I may have gone on.” I was on my knees clinging to his robes. “Save me Brother Leo!”

Taking me in his arms he did his best to hug me around the wings. I stepped back and concentrated on the wings going away. As they disappeared back into my back I did my best to stifle the pain of it. “ Let's go to my study. I have to document this. All of it. You must tell me everything!” He said excitedly as he grabbed my arm. We made it to the room unseen and I proceeded to tell him all of what happened the night I was initiated into the Coven of the Children of Lilith. I left nothing out. He wrote it all down astonished. When we were done I let him take vials of my blood for further experimentation and examination. Brother Leo said he would contact me in several days with answers. I trusted him with my life and was able to get back to the brothel undetected. I cried myself to sleep that night. I prayed and prayed that a solution could be found. My heart was breaking without my Katie.

As Brother Leo promised he called out to me telepathically approximately a week later. We met in the garden of the Abbey once again. He gave me a small journal of all of his notes and findings. In it there were formulas to help subdued my sexual hunger and blood lust. He promised they would not keep me weak as the ones he used to give me long ago. Again, I trusted he was speaking the truth. Handing me a wooden box with handles on the sides, inside, contained herbs and other components I would need to make the elixirs. We hugged and off I flew, back home. In no time at all I got the swing of how to concoct the elixirs and I was feeling like my old self again within a couple of days and it began to show. Katie began to feel more comfortable with me and our courtship continued on. All seemed fine in the world.

May They Have Mercy on My Soul

It was eventually found out that September I had gone against the coven and visited the Abbey. Who told them I had no clue. To my knowledge there were only two who knew, Brother Leo and myself. With my action I could be kicked out of the Coven of the Children of Lilith. They saw it as an act of treason. Maeve was greatly angered with me because I went behind her back. And Demitri called for council with the Elders as to how this infraction should be punished. I begged them to please listen to my side. Why it was so important for me to take such a risk to see Brother Leo. What I had learned. But none would listen. They were all too wrapped up in their protocol and anger. Kryimsson seemed to better understand my reasoning and once again expressed his dislike for rules and regulations. Especially when they have no room for extraordinary circumstances such as mine. He was very displeased with his sister. How could she treat me the way she was? I had freed her and Demitri and now here they were ready to lock me away. “Blasphemy!” He would say. He found it all highly unfair. Sebastian, loyal to the end, did his best to defend me but it only fell on deaf ears. He was my fledgling after all. It was expected that he would defend me. At least that's how those who ruled the coven saw it. Out of desperation I called for my own trial. This shocked everyone. Until then I isolated myself from everyone. Including Pierre, Katie and Sebastian. I was about to plead for my life. I needed no distractions. All Hallows Eve was to be the night.

I entered the great chamber where all coven ceremonies take place at the brothel. The elders were seated in their usual places and the rest were standing around the pentagram on the floor in a circle. They split to allow me to stand in the center.

“Why have you called for this trial Nicholas? You blatantly broke coven rules so why should we allow leniency?” Asked Demitri.

“Because this is the only way I can get any of you to listen to me. I tried asking for help as Maeve told me of the coven elders, but one of you could be bothered. Time and time again I begged all of you to help and you stood silent. You decidedly chose to believe rumors about me rather than help me. My work here was suffering. My relationships with those I love were suffering. I had to do something before I lost total control and something bad happened. I did what I had to do.” Continuing on I presented my case, telling them all of what I was experiencing and suffering through. That I went to Brother Leo out of desperation. As I went on to tell more of what he had taught me and how much better I had been feeling suddenly a collective gasp echoed through the room. The men pulled their knives ready for the attack. I spun around and saw Brother Leo and Mother Superior standing there in the doorway, unchaperoned! I ran and stood before them in protection.

“Don't you dare!” I growled at them. My eyes turned bright red. “I mean it! Stay back!”

“How dare they enter our home!” Demitri yelled at me. “How dare you protect them!”

“Why are you so ready to attack? It is very obvious they mean us no harm. They are here alone, unarmed and unescorted. So tell me Demitri, what threat do they pose? Why not find out why they have come to seek us out?” I pleaded.

“Why have you come Mother Superior?” Maeve asked sternly.

“We have come to defend the child of Lilith.” She said matter of factly. All stood staring in utter shock. This was all highly unheard of. A rival coven coming to the defense of the other’s member. Never! Maeve was taken back by her answer.

“Shall we let them speak on Nicholas's behalf?” Demitri demanded of the coven members present. To his astonishment all agreed to allow it. Brother Leo went on to describe the state I was in when I came to visit him at the Abbey. Told them the same exact things I did about the journal with the formulas and how they worked. I told them all about how much they helped and I was learning to control my new gifts much easier now. Mother Superior told Maeve of how she looks upon me as a son and not a foe. Even with me being absconded away from the Abbey under shady circumstances she had no ill will towards the Coven of the Children of Lilith. That she only wanted the best for me and wants honestly nothing more than peace between the two covens. Brother Leo took a scroll from his robes and presented it to Maeve. She unrolled it and began to read. Her eyes grew wide and a tear fell down her cheek. She looked at Mother Superior and asked, “Are you sure Mother Superior? Do you truly want to do this?”

“Yes my dear niece it is time. I am getting too old to continue on with all daily goings on of a coven.” She said with a tired smile.

“Mother Superior has presented us with a proposal. She asks me to unite the two covens To take the Coven of Cain under our wing and show it's members how to fully live in the world of humans. What says the council?”

“There is one thing I do ask of you though, before we continue.” Mother Superior turned to me and placing her fingers gently under my chin she turned my eyes to hers. “All has been silent from Bishop for several years now and I believe it safe for me to ask that Nicholas comes back to work as a Confessional at the Abbey once again. You are so gifted at it. Even in your suffering you gave all absolution with a grace never seen before. It is sorely needed now, if not more than ever. Please, Nicholas, come back and do this for us. We need you.” She pleaded in a voice I had never heard before.

“I believe with this arrangement it will also help with the issues you are having with your needs since your transformation.” Brother Leo piped up. My face flushed red with embarrassment. I looked over at Maeve and Sebastian who stood in shock. It was no secret how much I disliked being a Confessional. But I found myself responding.

“Yes, I will do it. But I have certain conditions. I wish to continue to live here, at the brothel. I will do my best to follow the word of our Lord the best I can, but know I will falter at times. For I am far from perfect and have yet a lot to learn. I have two loves in my life, Katie and Pierre, that I need to be intimate with and you must be okay with that. If not, I can not help you. I don't think this is asking too much for what I am to give to you of myself. My actions for the past ten years prove my loyalties lie with both covens. I swear to protect both with all of my power and ability when needed. If these terms are accepted, I will be your Confessional.”

“I agree, what you ask is very reasonable. We can accept those terms dearest Nicholas. I can not express enough what this means to us. And Maeve, do you accept my offer?”

“Oh yes my beloved aunt! Oh yes!” Maeve cried joyous tears. All cheered at the union that had just been forged in front of them. Demitri came over and shook Brother Leo’s hand and Kryimsson and Maeve hugged their uncle for the first time in over two hundred years.

A new era was about to begin in the vampire world. The elders of the Coven of Cain along with our coven agreed that night that the joined covens would now be called the “Coven of Lilith and Cain”. The following morning I told Katie about what had transpired the night before. I explained to her of the deal I made with Mother Superior about working for the Abbey. It wouldn't be every day and they would pay me handsomely. I could make enough that if we wanted to get a home of our own I could afford it. I had to explain to her in a bit more detail what a confessional was. Trust me, that was not an easy conversation to have with your loved one. It honestly was only work to me. I had no sexual gratification from any of it and I promised to stay abstinence for her while I did my job. I would give but never receive. I also went into detail about my relationship with Pierre and what he meant to me. That if I was to go back to working as a Confessional I needed him by my side. She was apprehensive about it but she also understood the importance of a Confessional to this particular vampire community. She saw me brave for doing it and supported my decision. She also understood my need for Pierre. In that moment it brought her and I closer. That she loved me enough to trust in me and our love for one another that this would not interrupt or deter our relationship. Sebastian was still very puzzled as to why I would go back, knowing how I felt about it, but supported me as well. As did Demitri and Kryimsson. I could tell Maeve was worried that my being at the Abbey might bring back terrible memories, but in all actuality I knew it wouldn't. I would use the energy I took from confessions and learn how to mold it and use it productively.

The evening before I began working at the Abbey it was a toss and turn sleepless night. My stomach was in knots. My mind raced between fear, second thoughts, and excitement. I dressed in the Sunday vestments that Mother Superior sent for me to wear. Black velvet with red velvet trim, black sash with red tassels. It had been ten years since I last wore the uniform. I tied back my long white hair and put on my wide brimmed vicars hat. Swallowing my apprehension I left early that morning before all awoke. A carriage with heavy guard sat outside the brothel waiting for me. Mother Superior was taking no chances with my safety. The ride from the brothel to the Abbey was about a half hour. During that time my brain would not shut up.

Upon my arrival the whole congregation of clergy, servants and slaves were there to greet me. I was shocked and a bit embarrassed. I was actually hoping to slip in without being seen. We now see how well that went. Hugs and kisses, tears shed, and 'we missed you' were given as I walked in. Mother Superior, Lady Char, Brother Leo were also in attendance for my arrival as well, but no Pierre. My heart sank a bit. Was he disappointed that I became a Confessional again? The inside still had that old church musty smell. My first day back was very surreal. There was a time where I thought my life’s existence was purely for the Abbey and my work as a Confessional. I was treated well and respected despite the sexual nature of the job. I was content. But once I was free from them, I never wanted to go back. But, here I was, walking down the large stone hallways heading to my old room. There would be times I would have to stay there depending on my schedule and how many confessions I had to take. Also it was nice to have to go and recoup and rest away from everyone. A place to prepare before each confession. It would be strange not having Sebastian there by my side. I had no idea how this was going to go. My nerves felt raw. The guard opened the door for me and as I entered, there was Pierre, sitting on the edge of the bed. My heart skipped a beat. He stood and I ran to him hugging him as tightly as I could.

“Oh Pierre, I thought you were upset with me. Why were you not with the rest to greet me?”

“Mon petit, mon amour, Oh how I have missed you ma chere petite. I wanted some time alone with you before we began our work.” He took my hand in his. Tears began to swell making his blue eyes look even bluer. He looked so handsome in that moment.

“Why are you crying beloved?” I asked, wiping the tears from his cheeks.

“I feel great guilt. I have not been honest with you my dearest. When we learned you had been kidnapped, all assumed that Bishop was behind it. The whole Abby mourned you for they lost their dear Confessional. I had lost my beloved. I mourned you above all. I was inconsolable, so Lady Char sent me back to Paris to gather myself. Mother Superior thought it was best as well out of fear of what Bishop might have planned next. Eventually it was found out that the Children of Lilith were behind the kidnapping and Lady Char brought me back to the Abbey. Mother Superior knew she could not go after you. So she forbade me from having any contact with you. If I broke the rule, I would be permanently banished from the Abbey. I couldn't take that chance. I did not want to lose my Mistress Lady Char as I had lost you.” Taking my face in his hands he continued, “None other than Brother Leo know of our union before God. Not even Lady Char. It had killed me inside to keep this from all, but I do not want to be sent away. Please my beloved Nicholas, please keep it our secret. Please.”

I sat for several moments in silence trying to find the right words. Where do I even start? Deep down inside my gut I knew no matter what I was about to say would hurt him and possibly change our relationship even more. So much time had passed, I finally had him back in my arms and I desperately didn't want to lose him again. I would do anything to keep him.

“When I first arrived here I wanted nothing more than to get out, run away, be anywhere but here. I knew what was in store for me and that fear paralyzed me. What I didn't see coming was you. My dearest Pierre. My Love. You made my life here heaven. You completed me. You understood me and never judged me for my failings. We are mates and time apart to me feels as if part of me is missing. I also understand your love for Lady Char and this Abbey. I would never do anything to jeopardize any of that for you. I will gladly keep our secret my love. Anything for you. Plus now with me working here we will be able to be with each other much more often. No more early morning trysts.” I kissed his cheeks and wiped the tears away from his eyes. Kissing my lips softly, we quickly moved into more passionate lustful play.

“Show your Maître how much you missed him.” Pierre said as he pointed down. There was a bit of anger mixed with sternness in his demand. It caught me slightly off guard sending a light shiver through my spine. I want to be in this moment with him. I needed it. “Show me mon petit.” Obediently I went down on my knees. I knew what he wanted and was eager to please him. I was instantly back in those anxious moments of our Master/submissive relationship during my early days of training. Taking his hard cock in my hand I wrapped my lips around it. Flicking my tongue along the shaft and head the way he loved as it slid in and out of my mouth. His hand on the back of my head setting the pace. Before I knew it we were having sex. It all happened so fast. He picked me up and told me to lean over the bed. Pulling my hips up to meet his groin, flipping my vestments up, exposing my ass. He was more than ready, and so was I. To say I was pent up would be an understatement. He was able to enter me easily and we fell into a rhythmic motion, both of us unleashing our lust. It was quick, but ecstatically passionate. I felt something I hadn't felt in some time, complete.

Tempting Faith

By March of 1785 I became more and more disenchanted with my life. I was never happy about going back to being a Confessional. I did it for the benefit of all involved, meaning the Coven of Lilith and Cain. I care greatly for my coven and the safety of the innocent, but I was tired of coven politics at the same time. I was taking confessions about five to six days a week, several a day. I could now physically handle the work, but emotionally, it still took its toll at times. The incubus inside wanted more and I just wanted a normal life. Whatever that was. I was not able to spend the time I wanted with Katie, and when I wasn't working I was with Pierre while staying at the Abbey. He had become very demanding of my time since my return. He owned my heart, I couldn't say no.

Demitri seemed disillusioned as well. He felt too much responsibility had fallen on Maeve's shoulders and blamed me. The truth of it was she was flourishing in her new position. She surrounded herself with the elders from both covens to help develop new rules for the newly joined alliance. She was busy most evenings meeting with different coven members and potential members. At other times she tried to take some time for herself. Her and Demitri began to become even closer during this time as well. They were in the midst of a whirlwind romance. Hence his disdain for her working so much.

There were times I longed to be back at sea. I wanted to smell the salt air of the ocean, feel the wind on my face. I would sit on the banks of the Mississippi and watch the ships come in and out of port when I wasn't needed at the Abbey. I was given all comforts and my every need was always met. I had the loves of my life Katie and Pierre. The love and protection of my fledgling Sebastian and a coven who embraced me. But even that didn't help take away the longing of wanting to run away at times. I had this constant feeling in the pit of my stomach that trouble was coming.

Then the voices started. First it was just whispers in the wind moving on to someone calling my name. I did my best to ignore it. I thought it was just my mind playing tricks on me until I heard his voice. I recognized it straight off. It was Bishop. Anger swelled in me. He had found me. How was that possible? I had magically warded myself. How did he break through? Did he break through or is it someone else doing it for him? I didn't know. What I did know was it was becoming harder to concentrate on my duties at the Abbey with Bishop's constant chatter of what he and his new flock of renegades had planned. They had been slowly growing in numbers. The only thing I could think of to block him out of my head was to start smoking opium again. And boy was it plentiful here in New Orleans. It started off as just a nightly thing to shut him out of my mind so I could sleep.

Over the next couple of weeks I tried my hardest to do what was expected of me. Katie was spending a lot more time with me which helped keep me on the straight and narrow. It helped keep my mind off the wicked monk’s voice tormenting me. One night Katie and I were lying in my bed talking and she started playing with the ring I wore around my neck. I took it off and handed it to her. “If anything were to happen to you. If you felt you were in trouble and couldn't get away, turn the middle of the ring and it will call to Kryimsson who will be able to help.”

“Why are you talking like that? Nothing's going to happen to me silly boy.” She said laughing and kissed me.

I pulled myself up and rested against the headboard. “I'm serious. Just promise me that if anything happens...”

“Okay, okay I will.” she answered worriedly as she cuddled closer to me.

“Why do you feel something is going to happen to me?”

“You'll think I'm crazy.”

“No baby, I wouldn't. Please Nicholas, tell me.” She said taking my hand in hers kissing it softly.

I let out a big sigh and said, “I have been hearing voices.”

“What kind of voices?”

“I've been hearing voices in the wind, and in my constant thoughts. They say they are coming for me.”

“Who's coming for you? Why would someone want to hurt you?” She didn't know much of my past other than I was a pirate and a Confessional at the Abbey. I had wished to keep it that way, but I knew soon I would have to be honest with her.

“The Order of the Old Blood. I did something pretty bad to piss them off.”

“What did you do?”

“I woke Maeve and Demitri, bringing on the inevitable end of the Order of Cain's hold over the monastery here in New Orleans. Bishop O’Mannan, was excommunicated from the church and banished from the coven. He was supposed to be kept imprisoned in an eternal slumber, but his fledglings attacked the Abbey and freed him. They are determined to destroy me and all I love out of revenge.”

She sat up quickly, her hand shot to her mouth in shock. “Oh Nicholas, that's not good.”

“Please don't tell anyone. Please promise. No one knows I'm hearing these voices. Not Sebastian or Kryimsson. Not even Maeve knows. Please.” My voice broke into somewhat of a panic.

“I promise baby, I promise.” Katie said as she hugged me tight. We settled back down in bed and I fell asleep with Katie laying on my chest. Even with her spending the nights with me, opium became more and more my escape. My work began to suffer. She became very concerned and did her best to hide my addiction from Maeve. Eventually she did find out and it wasn't pretty.

I had just finished having a smoke and it started to take its hold of me when my door flung open. Maeve came rushing in and I could tell I was in for a world of hurt.

“Nicholas!” She screamed at me slightly jarring me out of my doped up haze. “What are you doing?” She stormed over to the bedside table and picked up the opium pipe. “Is this why you have been screwing up so badly as of late? I know Katie has been trying to cover for you but you should know by now I find out everything! This is MY house!”

She was furious. I felt so small and ashamed. I never meant to anger her or have her disappointed in me. All I could do was keep my eyes to the floor as she continued to yell at me. “Have I not given you a beautiful home to live in. A beautiful girl anytime you want in your bed. Have I not been kind to you and met your every need during your time here? I allow you to even work outside this house. Perhaps the pressures of a Confessional are becoming too much for you?”

I didn't know how to answer. Maeve was right. She had given me all those things and much more. And here I was becoming addicted to opium again. I wanted to tell her about the voices and the fear I lived in. Not for myself, but those I had come to love dearly. Even with my inherent gifts of magickal power, I did not believe I could protect them all.

“Answer me!” She screamed and slapped me hard across the face.

“I'm so sorry Maeve. I really am. I don't know what's wrong with me lately. I promise to do better.”

She grabbed me by the hair and dragged me down towards the dungeon. I struggled to make her stop but she had a good hold of me. She slammed me hard against the wall knocking the wind out of me. “Don't you dare struggle against me, ever! You are going to take this punishment.”

Panic started to take over. I was flying high on the opium and it was causing me to start having flashback of the torture I suffered at Bishops hands. When we reached the dungeon she motioned for the two women guards to help her. I was shackled, gagged and blindfolded. Maeve grabbed me by the hair and hissed at me. She was so angry. The sting of the switch jolted me back to Rhavan's castle. His face flashed in front of me. I began to shake uncontrollably, as I feverishly worked to get the blindfold off. I was able to slip the blindfold off and it slid down around my neck. I was able to clear my vision enough to remember where I was. Maeve noticed what I had done and grabbed me again by the hair. “What the hell do you think you are doing?”

I pleaded with her the best I could through the gag for her not to put the blindfold back on. She removed the gag and demanded, “Why should I not put it back on. You don't deserve to see or speak.”

“Please, the opium is causing me to see things.” I said hoarsely.

“What kind of things?”

“Him...”

“Him who? Say it!”

“Rha...Rhavan.” A single tear escaped as I said it.

The look on her face became a bit softer, she wiped the tear from my cheek and said, ”Fine, no blindfold. But if I see one more tear fall during this punishment I will add another day that you are to stay down here. Is that understood?” she replaced the gag.

I nodded yes, and she picked up where she left off. I felt the switch leaving deep welts and tearing at my flesh. I concentrated hard on not giving in to the pain. The two women lifted my legs up to expose the bottom of my feet. They were lashed bloody.

“What else are you hiding from me boy? I know you didn't just develop this opium habit over night. What or who drove you to the opium dens?”

I gave no response. She let out a huff of annoyance. She knew she wouldn't be able to beat it out of me. By this time I was too conditioned to the pain.

“Nicholas, you are to hang down here like this until I see fit to have you fetched. Perhaps during this time you will find your tongue and come clean with me.” And there I was left for the next three days.

Time between starving and sleeping was spent thinking of how I was going to better my situation once I got out of this predicament. There had to be a better way. I wanted more out of my life. I made up my mind then and there I was going to make Katie mine. Ring and all. It didn't matter to me anymore that she would grow old and pass on. All that mattered was we still had a lifetime together. Hers. And I would do anything to keep her happy and content for the rest of her days. I came to realize I was even more, madly, deeply in love with Katie than ever before.

When I was finally allowed out of the dungeon and had fully rested from my ordeal I told Maeve of the taunting voices of Bishop. She was sympathetic and together we would work on finding a solution. With her help I began to get better control of my gifts, and Sebastian taught me how to block out the taunting voices. Pierre and I worked together on helping me work through my emotions as well. We both agreed that perhaps I needed more discipline of the cane and flogger to better purge my pent up feelings. Even more so now that I was back working as a Confessional. I needed a way to purge my frustrations and anger and I did that through pain during these sessions. I knew that this deeply bothered Katie, but I also didn't feel comfortable enough to ask this of her. I felt like a deviant, and she was my angel. I just couldn't do it.

“Even sinners need God.” Sebastian always said.

Since Katie was Irish, and Catholic, sex out of wedlock was seen as a huge sin against God. If I wanted her I had to do the right thing by her. It was going on almost two years that I had been courting her. It had gone on long enough. She couldn't wait around forever. With Maeve's help we went into town and we found the most beautiful opal ring.

March 27 1785, Easter Sunday, I woke Katie up early so we could attend Sunday mass together. I made sure to disguise myself and glamour my looks so I could not be detected. We also had a very heavily armed secret escort keeping a close eye. After we came back from services I told Katie I had a surprise for her and to go change into a dress I had left for her in her room. That Maeve would come collect her shortly. The garden behind the house had been decorated beforehand in elaborate floral arrangements and candles. I went and stood in the garden to wait for my love. I was an absolute nervous wreck. My hands shook as I tried to button my vest. Kryimsson helped me.

“Relax my young friend. You have nothing to be nervous about.” he said.

“Am I doing the right thing? I mean I know what I am getting myself into. But is this all fair to her?” I questioned worriedly.

“Nicholas, she loves you. She loves you more than the moon and the stars. I can see it every time she looks at you. She's a strong woman and knows all too well what she is taking on being with you. And I know in your heart you know it too. Go, enjoy this day. It's about the two of you and your undying love for one another, I mean look how ungodly long you courted her. I don't know many humans, much less any vampire woman who would have waited that long. We almost didn't think ya had it in ya boy.” He teasingly laughed at me.

“For the entire time I have known you Nicholas you have searched for acceptance and love. To be able to live your life the way you wanted. I know being a Confessional isn't your most favorite way to earn a living, but you are good at it. You deserve happiness and Katie brings that into your life. She completes you. Even more than Pierre. Be happy Sire. You have a lifetime ahead of you to enjoy.” Sebastian said as he hugged me.

I kept tumbling our wedding rings around in my hand. I had enchanted them so I could always keep connected to her. Like how Kryimsson's ring worked for our connection. Maeve was now approaching with a very happy Katie on her arm.

“Nicholas, what is all of this? It's so lovely!” She exclaimed and jumped in my arms showering my face with kisses. “You always do the most romantic things for me. You shower me with gifts and trinkets and always make sure I have fresh flowers in my room. Oh how the other girls are so jealous.”

“ Katie, you are my best friend. My confidant. One of the true loves of my life.” I knelt down on one knee and took her hand in mine. Her emerald green eyes grew big.

“You my darling are the love of my life. And I know that I may be asking a lot, but, if you would have me, I would love to spend the rest of your life making you feel like a princess. Katherine Siobhan Kent, would you marry me?”

She stood frozen for a moment. A pang of fear hit my heart that Maeve may have been right and I was asking too much. “I'm sorry. I know I am asking a lot of you. But I....”

Suddenly she cried out, “Yes! Yes! Oh Yes my love! Yes!” tears of joy flooded from her eyes.

I scooped her up in my arms and spun her around. I was so happy. She said yes! She hadn't noticed that the entire house and staff had quietly snuck up in and around the garden waiting for her answer. Everyone jumped up and hooped and hollered in happiness. Mother Superior approached to begin the ceremony.

“I am sorry we are not doing this at the church my beloved, but it's just too dangerous for us to do this there. I never want to put you in harm's way. I hope this is alright?”

“God is not in a church my love, you know that. God is always around us. He is here with us right now. I know we have his blessing. Yes, my love, I want to marry you here and now.”

Mother Superior performed a short and most beautiful ceremony joining me with my love. As Katie and my hands we joined she wound a braided cord around our wrists. Symbolizing our union of love. After it was over we jumped over a broom. Katie was absolutely radiantly happy. I too was elated.

Sebastian came over and hugged me and Katie as did most of the people there. A few stood and observed. Mostly the visiting elders. Some stood back in jealousy. The look on Pierre's face was clear. A small smile crossed his face when I looked at him.

“Didn't think to discuss it with me first, mate?” he said to me telepathically.

It was the first time he had ever shown any sign of jealousy. My moment of joy had suddenly been dashed. He was right. I should have talked it over with him. A strange feeling hit my heart. It hurt. Thankfully no one saw my reaction and I was able to put it aside for the moment.

Katie had fully accepted my relationship with Pierre. That there were things only he and I could do for each other considering the nature of what we did at the Abbey. She saw that we were in love and treated each other with honor and respect. With the two of them I felt complete. But now it seemed I had just inadvertently hurt one of them. I would have to find a way to make it up to him.

In the very late evening hours after the reception had ended I made sure all was secure in the house, Maeve attended too and the guests were all asleep in their rooms, I went to wake Katie. She had gone to sleep in her bedroom. Sleepily she tried to ask why I awoke her. All I did was put my finger to my lips to signal her to be quiet. I gently picked her up and carried her back to my room placing her on the bed. It was very evident on her face she knew what was going to happen. It was our wedding night after all. Her face flushed pink with excitement. She stood up and began to unbutton my shirt, slowly sliding it off my shoulders. Then she sheepishly untied my trousers. They fell to the floor as her eyes sparkled in giddy amazement. Katie then pulled on the tie on her nightgown allowing it to fall to the floor around her feet. Her body was more amazingly beautiful than I had ever imagined. Her skin was as pale as a vampire, almost like a porcelain doll. Her breasts were firm and her hips were rounded. The perfect hourglass figure. I laid her back down on my bed and we began kissing and slowly letting our hands explore each other. I knew she was a virgin and I was going to go as slowly and as gently as I could for her first time. She trembled slightly as my hands caressed her soft skin. I kissed her face and neck and down to her breast. My tongue ever so softly teasing the nipple. She sighed heavily as her body began to react to my touch. I slid my hand down and felt between her legs. Her mound was wet and ready for me to enter.

“Are you ready? Are you sure you want this my love?” Her hand shot up to my mouth.

“Hush now and take me Husband.” She whispered in a lustful voice. Chills of excitement flowed through me. I reached down and slowly worked myself into her tight vagina. She moaned and threw her arms around me, pulling me tight to her. “Take me. Take me Nicholas.” I entered her feeling her hymen tear. She cried out in painful ecstasy as I worked my hips moving in and out of her at a rhythmic pace. My body began to feel warm and sexual energy was building inside me. I had to be careful. I didn't want to harm her. Her body writhed in pleasure as our bodies danced in sexual euphoria. I could feel we were both nearing climax. As she came, the energy slowly escaped me as I climaxed with her driving her into orgasm after orgasm. She begged me to stop. I pulled out and she collapsed unconsciously in my arms. Shaking her gently she would not wake. In a panic, I covered her with a blanket and I ran with her in my arms to Maeve's room. When I knocked quietly on her door she answered startled.

“What is it Nicholas? What's wrong? Wait, is that Katie?”

“Yes. We made love, she passed out. I think I did something to her. Please help her. Oh Maeve what have I done?” I panicked.

Pulling me into her room, she began to giggle. “Oh the poor thing. She couldn't handle your sexual essence. She is a human after all. She will be fine my lovely boy. Your passion only overwhelmed her.” Maeve motioned for me to lie Katie down on her bed. She grabbed a cloth and dipped it in the water pitcher dabbing it on Katie's forehead and cheeks gently. She slowly began to come around. I showered her face with little kisses. Her arms reached out and pulled me close.

“I never believed it could feel so good. So intense. My body won't stop shaking. I feel so amazing beloved. I never imagined it could be like this.” She cried as she held onto me tightly. I held her and continued to kiss her lovely face. I was so scared that I hurt her. But now that I understood a bit more about the power of an incubus, I would teach myself how to control it better. I swore that day I was going to work hard to be the man she needed as well as the lover she needed.

The following day I went to the Abbey and sought out Pierre right away. I needed to apologize for not speaking to him about marrying Katie. The night before I couldn’t sleep. All I saw when I closed my eyes was the look on his face. Gods it tore at my soul. I had to find a way to make it right.

He was still in his room preparing for the day's training sessions with Lady Char. When I walked in he glanced slightly over his shoulder and then back looking at himself in the mirror.

“What do you want, Nicholas? Isn’t this your honeymoon? You should be with your new bride. As you can see I’m busy, so please, whatever you have to say, make it quick for I am running a bit late this morning.” His voice was cold.

“I, I, I’m so, so very sorry I did not confide in you first before marrying Katie. I honestly, truly am. You know I would never intentionally hurt you. I love you Pierre, I love you beyond the stars and back. Please look at me, my love.” I grabbed him, forcing to look at me. The anger was clear in his eyes as his face showed no emotion.

“Selfish impulsive stupid boy. Did you think I would not give my blessing? No? That’s the problem Nicholas, you never think , you only react.” He hissed at me. It cut me like a knife. Pushing me away he walked out the door. “You may go be with your new bride. I have work to do.” And out he went. I stood there frozen, in utter numbing shock. I suddenly couldn’t breathe and collapsed to my knees. This can’t be it. This can’t be the end of us? Oh God what have I done? I ran to the chapel and threw myself in prostate before the altar. I begged forgiveness, I prayed it was not too late for Pierre and I to find our way back to each other, that I be granted the wisdom to understand what I did wrong and find a solution to make it right with Pierre. He was right. I was impulsive. But was it done selfishly? I got caught up in the moment. The love for her, wanting her. Yes, I guess it was selfish as well. Oh, what had I done. I was on the brink of losing Pierre and the thought of him not in my life was strangling. I laid there and prayed for hours that somehow I could find an answer. I walked through the rest of my day at the Abbey like a zombie. I had to snap out of it before heading home to Katie. I didn’t want her to know how badly I had fucked up with Pierre.

A Glorious Miracle

Over the next month while I was working through my royal fuck up with Pierre, which I did not want to bring into our marriage, I could tell something was bothering Katie. She would just tell me she was tired and not feeling well. Growing concerned I talked her into seeing the house physician. Later that day I found her crying in the garden.

“My love, what is wrong? Why are you so upset? Are you very ill?” I asked, extremely concerned as I took her in my arms. She just sobbed even harder. I was at a complete loss as to how to console her. “Please Katie, talk to me. What is wrong?” I begged.

“Oh Nicholas, what are we going to do?” She sobbed.

“What is it my beloved?”

“The house doc says I'm with child.”

I looked down at her in my arms. Did she just say she was pregnant? A pang of joy hit my heart. “Don't cry my beloved, this is an amazing thing! Why are you sad?” I was so excited!

“I don't know how it happened? The only man I have been with is you and you are a vampire. It is impossible for...” She broke down sobbing again. “I swear my love I have been with no one else. Oh, how you must hate me.”

Taking her face in my hands I made her look me in the eyes. “God! No! Never! I love you more than life. A baby! You're gonna have a baby! Our baby!” I was elated! I could barely sit still. She just looked at me with utter confusion.

“So you are alright with what I told you? You are not worried?”

“God no! I just didn't think I could, well, ya know.” I giggled, rubbing her belly.

“Nicholas, I need to tell you something else.” She said nervously.

“Is something wrong with the baby?”

“Oh no my love. It's nothing like that. It's, It's just, well, I'm pregnant with twins.

I sat back stunned. Not only did I not think I could ever be a father, but now here I am with twins on the way. “Wow. I am happy but a bit shocked as well. I didn't think I could have children. Brother Leo said...”

“Well it looks like the monk was wrong now wasn't he.” She snapped a bit annoyed.

“Let’s change the subject for a moment. Since we have been married it occurred to me I know very little about you and with now carrying yer babies, Nicholas, please tell me more about yourself. I am sorry I never asked before. As with protocol here, we just learn not to ask questions.”

“Understandable my love. Sometimes it is best to not know. Trust me. But I will indulge you. What do you want to know?”

“Everything!” She bounced excitedly.

“Well, I guess starting at the beginning is as good a place as any to start, right? Let’s see, I was born in the fall, most likely September, of 1670 of our Lord in a place called Svartálfaheimr. It was located under the Scandinavian mountains. About the time of my forty-ninth year I came of age and was to be sacrificed to our Goddess Hel. Where I come from, males are not much worth. We are meant for breeding and war. Nothing more. A vampire, my maker, took me from the Svartálfaheimr when I was charged with my sisters murder the day of the sacrifice. I came to find out later it was actually he who had murdered her. He took me back to Germany to his ancestral home and there he kept me as a pet of sorts. Life with him and his brood was far from pleasant. I was able to finally escape him with the help of one of his fledglings. From there I stayed with a great group of warriors in Moldjord, Norway. Eventually my family found me and dragged me back. Things there didn't end well for any of them and once again I made my escape. I ran towards England. While in Liverpool I was press-ganged onto a merchant ship. We were attacked at sea by a pirate named, Captain Roberts. I joined his crew after being taken prisoner. I sailed with him for several years until I was sent to work for another ship. That is where I met Kryimsson. We sailed the high seas together for another several years until our ship crashed off the coast of the Caribbean. I was picked out of the pacific ocean by the Royal Navy and sent to prison as a pirate. That is what this mark on my hand means. I was a pirate. Anyway, there I sat and withered away until 1740 when I was sent here to New Orleans as an indentured servant to a monastery. That is where I met Brother Leo, and Sebastian who as you know is my fledgling. Bishop O'Mannan, the head of the monastery, and I did not get along, and he is a horrible, horrible wicked sinful man and a vampire. I was sent there on purpose to be their food and to feed “Those who shall not be awoken.” That was Maeve and Demitri. Things between Bishop and I came to a head and I woke them, freeing them. I was put into a deep slumber as punishment since they couldn't kill me. After some years locked away in my coffin, Sebastian woke me briefly where I embraced him. Again, I was put into a deep sleep for a long time. Eventually I could not be kept in this state of imprisonment so I was sent off to the Abbey of St. Francis to be a Confessional. There I stayed until I was rescued and brought here. That is pretty much everything.” I kept a lot of the sorted details out on purpose. Mostly because I just didn't like to talk about it. Katie looked at me in stunned amazement. She looked so beautiful in that moment. Her green eyes sparkling in the candle light.

“I can't believe how much life you have lived so far. You're one hundred and seventeen? You look no older than an eighteen year old human. Absolutely amazing! I wonder what our babies will look like. Do you think they will be born with elf ears?” she asked excitedly.

“Honestly I really don't know. When do you think we should tell everyone? They will figure it out soon enough when your belly gets bigger.”

“Let's wait a little bit longer. I want to enjoy this a little more just between us. Is that okay with you my love?”

“Anything for you my beloved. Anything!” I said, picking her up and spun around with her in my arms.

For several more weeks we kept our secret. During this time though, Katie began to have a craving for blood. She was not a vampire, and had no want to be one. I found her biting on her own arms, sobbing, looking at me terrified. “What's happening to me?” she sobbed. Worried, I went and confided in Sebastian. He told me I should go and talk to Brother Leo at once. If anyone could help, it was him. When I went to the Abbey the following day I found him working in his chambers on the upcoming Sunday's sermon. He greeted me with a hug when I walked in. “What brings this wonderful visit to my door?”

“It's, well, I.” I wasn't sure how to start

“Is something wrong Nicholas? Are things still raw between you and Pierre?” He asked worried.

“Not really he is still being distant, but he at least speaks to me without the tone of anger in his voice. Actually it's about Katie. Well, she's with child. Mine. Twins.”

Brother Leo sat staring at me speechless. He took me by the arms and sat me down opposite him. “Wait. What? Did you just tell me you got a human woman pregnant? Are you sure it's yours? I do not mean to be crass or disrespectful, it's just, it's unheard of for vampires to breed through fornication.”

“I am quite confident the unborn children are mine. Which is what brought me here to see you. We haven't told anyone yet. Only Sebastian knows. He encouraged me to come see you. See, it's about Katie. She has begun craving fresh blood. So they have to be mine. You see?”

“I do. I am honestly befuddled. This is utterly unheard of in our world. And I am a man of the cloth. I don't know much about childbirth or women as a matter of fact. My thoughts at the moment is to give Katie fresh animal blood as was given to you. Hopefully that will quench the unborn's thirst. I believe perhaps Mother Superior is more the person you need to help Katie through this miracle conception.”

“Would you come with me Brother Leo? For support? I feel very nervous. Like a child going to talk to a parent.” I laughed a little.

“Of course my son. I will come with you.”

Together we went to seek council with Mother Superior. She greeted us warmly and joined her by the huge fireplace. I sat next to her at her feet, as I always did in her presence. She smiled and patted my head. “So, what do I owe this wonderful privilege?” She asked cheerfully.

“Young Nicholas has some remarkable news to share with you your Grace. Go on! Tell her.”

I took a deep breath and said, “I am going to be a father.”

She looked at me and Brother Leo in wide-eyed shock. “Are you sure it's yours child?”

“Oh yes Mother Superior, without a doubt. The children are mine. My love, my wife, Katie is human, but yet she is craving fresh blood. Brother Leo says it's the babies who hunger for it. What should I do?”

“Twins? Oh my, my, my. Since they are yours feed her your blood Nicholas. Mix it with herbs that Brother Leo will give to you. Animal blood may not be enough. If the children are truly yours then your blood will benefit them most. This is highly unheard of. A vampire impregnating a human. Highly unheard of. This is a miracle. A true miracle!” She rejoiced.

I was so relieved she wasn't upset with me. In a way I looked at her and Brother Leo as extended family. I mean he did do his best to care for me all those years at the monastery. He always had patience for me. And Mother Superior did right by showing me justice when Bishop attacked me. Even with me being taken by a “rival” coven, I still cared for them and they for me. After my meeting with them I went to find Pierre. I know I promised Katie we would not tell anyone, but Pierre wasn’t just ‘somebody’ to me. He was still in the training room when I eventually found him. Things between us were getting better, but there was still distance on his part. I understood and accepted it although I continued to try everything I could to make it up to him. I showered him with gifts and extra attention when I was at the Abbey. He was putting away some of the whips when I walked in. I fell before him on my knees and kissed his feet. He placed his hand on my head signaling for me to rise.

“I need to talk with you Maître. Please, it’s very important. I have some news I need to share with you.”

Sitting in a nearby chair, he motioned for me to kneel before him. Sternly he said, “I’m very busy as you can see, what is so important that you feel the need to interrupt me while I work?”

“Pierre, please, I beg you, this anger you are holding towards me, we need to work through it. I love you and these past few weeks have been awful. I feel like a part of me is missing. What must I do for you to forgive me? I will do anything you ask. Anything.” I pleaded.

“What do you want Nicholas?”

“I want you to forgive me my beloved. How can you not believe me when I tell you I am so sorry for my impulsive actions. I need you in my life. I need you just as much as I need Katie. Please Pierre, what must I do?” The frustration was evident in my voice. This was killing me inside. I felt tears swelling. “Beat me, punish me until I bled and can’t move. Take your anger out on me. Anything but this. Do you want to leave me? Do you truly regret marrying me?” My hands shook as I fumbled with my coat.

Letting out a long sigh, Pierre placed his hand on my shoulder. “No, I do not regret our union nor do I wish to leave you. You hurt me Nicholas, hurt me to the core. It is going to take some time to get past my resentment. You understand? I will try to be less cross with you. What is the new you wish to tell me?”

“I have a question to ask you. Katie is pregnant and we would like you to be their Godfather. It would mean the world to us if you said yes. I love you and want you to be a part of every facet of my life. I can’t think of a greater way to honor you as my mate. Do you accept my beloved Pierre?”

Blinking several times in shock he grabbed me up in his arms and hugged me tightly. “A father? You’re going to be a father? Oh, mon amour, I am so happy for you. But wait? How? Oh, nevermind, I am so very happy for you both! Such a miracle! And yes, I would love to be the Godfather. You said them, is Katie pregnant with twins?”

I nodded, yes. He hugged me tightly again and his whole demeanor changed. Pierre was much kinder to me from that day forth and things began to go back to normal between us.

After the brothel had shut down for the night, the group of us were having a nightcap. Demitri and Maeve were discussing some coven business. Kryimsson, Sebastian and myself were playing cards and sharing stories about being at sea. Katie was seated next to me resting her head on my shoulder. Kryimsson was the first to notice something was weighing on my mind. “Your game is a bit off tonight. Something bothering you Nicholas?”

“Yes Nicholas you seem to have something weighing on you as of late?” Sebastian winked at me with a huge smile. I know he meant well, but it wasn't helping. Maeve and Demitri just stared at us puzzled. Katie looked at me and nodded. Standing up together, gathering myself, I fidgeted with my vest buttons for a few moments trying to figure out how to start.

“Please Nicholas, what is it? You know you can confide anything with us.” Maeve said, taking our hand in hers.

“Katie hasn't been feeling well lately. About two weeks ago we found out she is with child. We are going to have a baby. Well, actually more like twins.” I smiled nervously holding her in my arms. All of them except for Sebastian stared at us the same way Mother Superior did when I first told her the news. Katie looked at me worried.

“I knew they would be upset. What will we do?” She whispered.

I held her a little closer and looked down at her and smiled. “Hush my love, it's going to be alright. Trust me.” I reassured her, and myself. Maeve sat down with a troubled look on her face. Demitri and Kryimsson both congratulated us, hugging and patting me on the back.

“Wow! Twins! Did you hear that Maeve? They are having twins! Does this make me an uncle?” Kryimsson asked with a huge smile.

“Actually, I was wondering if you would be the child's Godmother Maeve?” I asked, taking her hand in mine. She looked at me with great concern in her eyes. Tilting my head, I was confused as to her reaction.

“What is it my love? Don’t you want to be the Godmother?” Demitri asked Maeve.

“Oh, of course I would love too! This to be a miracle, but at the same time I fear greatly for Katie. We have no idea how she will handle this pregnancy. Will she be able to carry them to term? How are you feeling my dear?”

“I feel very tired most of the time. And then there are the cravings. But we haven't acted on them.” She trailed off ashamed.

“What cravings?”

“She craves blood. Fresh blood. Brother Leo suggests I give her mine, in case the baby has the same issues I do.” I answered without thinking,

“You went to the Abbey and discussed this with them before telling us? Nicholas, how could you!” Demitri scolded me.

“There is nothing to fear from them. No one there wishes me or us any harm. We are all one now aren't we? Why else would she have asked Maeve to take over the Coven of Cain if it were not true? I believe this with all my heart there is no want of anything but peace. Just as I know the babies Katie is carrying are mine. Brother Leo has been nothing but kind to me since my arrival in New Orleans when he saved me from the auction block. He did his best to protect me from Bishop. He has been a good friend. Please don't be angry with me. It was never my intention to anger you. I needed answers and Brother Leo was the only one I could think of going to.”

“Mother Superior knows as well I am assuming.” Demitri snipped. I could tell he was not pleased.

“Yes, she too knows and is just as elated about the news as you all are. Why the animosity, Demitri? With their coven dissolved into the Coven of Lilith and Cain, what is the issue?” I argued. It began to really puzzle me as to why Demitri was always so quick to anger when it came to my relationship with those at the Abbey. I was married to Katie. I was no threat to him and Maeve's relationship, and I thought I never was. Yes we loved each other, but we were not in love with one another.

“Look, I don't care about all that nonsense, all I care about is that my best friend is going to be a Dah!” Kryimsson exclaimed and slammed down a shot of whiskey. We all laughed and agreed that it was a time of rejoicing. I could tell Maeve was still a bit shook but in time she fully embraced Katie’s pregnancy and helped take care of her.

It's the Good Life

It was a long day of confessions and my mind was just in a state of strange unrest. Something led me to the great chapel within the Abbey. I stood by the back pews and stared at the man hanging on the cross for some time. Curiously I thought to myself, if Jesus were to come back to earth, how would he feel about how humans worshiped him in his time of death. It was a strange religion to me but yet I was following it blindly to keep others happy. Did I believe in Christianity? In my heart, no. My soul though, was a different situation. I was the descendant of a Fallen Angel and a demon born to a race of violent elves. Did that automatically damn me? If what we read in the bible was true then I should be forgiven. Before I knew it I was on my knees in front of the altar praying. Or was it more of a deal? I don't think I knew the difference at the time. I prayed to Jesus and God and Mother Mary to watch over my dear Katie. To keep her and our unborn children safe and healthy. That I would continue to be a vessel of forgiveness to sinners. I promised them my soul in exchange for a life with Katie. A long, happy, love filled life. One where I could take care of her like a Queen. From that night on, I prayed every day.

Katie's pregnancy was a very difficult one. Carrying twins is rough enough, but vampires in utero were something completely different as we were learning. Her poor little human body was suffering greatly. They demanded a lot of nutrients from their mother which kept her very weak and in bed most of the time. I would spend all my time away from the Abbey at her bedside. She was not a huge fan of having to drink blood since she was not a vampire, but it was for the babies best benefit. Luckily my blood tasted sweet to her so it made it slightly less unnerving for her.

It was a blustery snowy Christmas day, the brothel was shut down for the holiday. It was decorated with hundreds of flowers and roses throughout. All were celebrating the day with feasting and drinking most of the evening. Katie began to not feel well earlier that day, but tried to ignore it. Unbeknownst to us, she was going into labor. The contractions began to become too intense for her and she collapsed on the ballroom floor. She had kept it to herself because she didn't want to ruin the party. Ugh, silly girl. I was so mad at her, she could have put the babies in danger. We got her to our bedroom and the women rushed me out and took after Katie. The birth took a great toll on her and she lost a tremendous amount of blood. I was nerve racked when they brought out all the bloody sheets. Then, there was a gurgled cry. Then another. The crying got stronger and louder as Remmy brought our bundles of joy to me. A little girl and a little boy. I was the first to hold them since Katie was recouping. They were both so tiny in my arms. The little ones were born perfect. Each with ten little fingers and ten little toes. Bright blue eyes and strong lungs as they cried out for their mama. They both had pointed tiny ears and hair as red as flames. They were the most beautiful creatures I had ever seen. Tears of joy streamed down my face. I thought my chest would burst with happiness. Every doubt I had ever had left me. I could do this. I would be the best Father they could ever have. I would give them all the love a child should have. They would never want for anything in this world for I will give it to them. I would provide a life of luxury for them. My little ones, my children. So precious they were. Pierre was the second to hold them. Tears streamed down his face as he cooed at them. It was the happiest I had seen him in a very long time. Later on once Katie felt well enough we named them. We named our son, Pierre Rideau, and our daughter, Katherine Maeve. Our two little miracles born on the same day of our Lord. It was a glorious day.

Our little ones changed slightly over the following months. Baby Pierre’s eyes changed to a light bluish gray, blonde hair like mine and baby Katie’s eyes turned green and hair fiery red like her mama's. They looked like little carbon copies of us. They were beautifully perfect. They fed strictly on blood. I would prick my finger and let them feed. Since they were so tiny, they didn't need to feed too often. Perhaps a teaspoon full at a time when they did. Katie's health came back to her quickly and she was back to her old happy, joyous self once again. She loved motherhood. She doted on our children and rarely let them out of her sight. When I would come home from the Abbey after a long day of taking confessions, I would come home and kiss my wife and take the babies from her to give her a break for a bit. Rocking them in my arms until we three fell asleep. More times than not I could be found this was most evenings.

Married life with Katie was more amazing than I ever dreamed it could be. I honestly never thought I could ever be so happy. After the babies were born I worked less at the Abbey to focus on my new family. Mother Superior and the congregation understood. This also at the same time kept me away from Pierre as well. After my marriage to Katie, everything began to change in our relationship. He became more demanding and seemed to be more of a Master now than a lover. None the less I loved him the same and did all I could to make up for the time I was away from his arms. As much as things were changing between us, I still needed him desperately. I felt as if I couldn't breathe at times when we were apart. I prayed for the day he would finally forgive me and our relationship could go back to how it used to be, full of love and passion for each other.

The Devil Takes All

Once the Coven of Lilith and Cain formed, a sort of peace fell upon New Orleans. Even Bishop and his ragtag group of Vampire monks had gone quiet. It had been years since their last attack. It was close to two years since I last heard any taunting voices. I started thinking it was time for a change. It was time for me to find a home for my wife and children. The twins were already crawling about and before we would know it they’d be running around getting under foot. A brothel was not the place to raise little ones. I had saved a nice sum of money and had my eye on a little shotgun house on Royal Street in the French Quarter for some time. Katie absolutely fell in love with the place as soon as she saw it. I purchased it then and there in cash. Arrangements were in place for servants to work for us and help with the babies. I was making a very good living as a Confessional and I was going to insure my family would never want for anything ever again. I was finally independent.

It was the first day of November 1786 and Maeve, Demitri, Kryimsson, Sebastian and I had taken a trip to Biloxi, Mississippi for coven business. The Coven of Lilith and Cain were looking to make alliances with other covens in the surrounding states. Sebastian, Kryimsson and I were Maeve and Demitri's escorts. Now that she was the head of a very large and powerful coven she needed all the protection we could give her. I always took Katie with me on these trips. I feared leaving her behind. This time she insisted on staying home and packing our belongings. We were due to move the next day into our new home. Thankfully our meetings went well and by early evening we were back on the steamboat headed home. We were about fifteen minutes from port when I began to feel an energy pull on my wedding ring. “Somethings wrong.” I whispered to Sebastian.

“What makes you think that?”

“There!” I pointed. As we rounded the bend on the Steamboat we could see black smoke billowing from the Abbey.

“The Abbey’s on fire! I have a feeling, a bad, bad one.” I exclaimed. I looked him dead in the eyes and he knew exactly what I meant. So did Kryimsson. Quickly they both donated their blood to me and I drank it, savored it. My body felt the surge of strength and rage. I focused hard and my wings tore through my back. The pain fueled me. I was off faster than they could keep up. In a matter of minutes I was above the Abbey. There had to be at least one hundred if not more of those damned monks and they were burning it down and killing anyone who tried to flee. I flew down and began to tear apart any one I could get my hands on. Snatching one up I flew high up into the sky with him screaming and flailing all the way.

“Where's Bishop!” I hissed.

“You'll never catch him you demon. You, you agent of Satan! But he will catch you and make you his. Oh that is a promise flying devil. He has something very special planned for you.” He laughed frightened.

“Do you believe in God young monk?” I asked through clenched teeth.

“Oh I do!”

“Then start praying.” I said and dropped him to his death. He landed impaled on the wrought iron fence that surrounded the Abbey. I went back to incinerating any I saw in my sights. Sebastian and Kryimsson cut them down easily as well. I was finally able to get inside where I ran into one of the house slaves.

“Where is Mother Superior?” I hollered at them grabbing by the arms. All they could do was point down. She was in the tombs. I ran down and found her cornered by several monks. I whistled to get their attention and as soon as they turned I set them aflame. I grabbed Mother Superior up in my arms and flew her out of the Abbey to a safe place until I could find the others. I was able to tell Sebastian telepathically to go to her and keep guard until I came back. I ran into Kryimsson as I headed back in to find the rest.

“Go find Brother Leo! I will find Lady Char and Pierre!” I shouted to him. He nodded and off he went. I ran through the burning Abbey calling their names. Something inside me guided me to one of the hidden back rooms off the confessional room. There I found them huddling together. Lady Char jumped up and hugged me sobbing with fear. Pierre was in no better shape. It was obvious he had been attacked. He had a blank stare and just sat and shook. I kissed him gently on the forehead. “It's all right now my dear love, I am here now and you are both safe. Mother Superior is also safe. We are still looking for Brother Leo. Do you know where he is?”

Frightened, they both shook their heads no. Taking them both in my arms I flew them to the safe spot where Sebastian was waiting for us. When I arrived, Kryimsson was there with Brother Leo. He was in very bad shape. We all agreed we needed to get them all back to the brothel. Suddenly I had a strangling feeling grip my heart.

“Katie! The wedding ring I gave Katie. I feel it calling me. Something is very wrong.” My panic soared. I felt a gripping fear at my heart. She was in trouble. I shot a look at Kryimsson, he felt it too for I had given her his ring as well. The two of us took off as Sebastian got the others back to the brothel via carriage.

The brothel was on fire when we arrived. Maeve and Remmy came running up to us in the garden behind it. They were covered in blood. I grabbed her. “What happened? Who did this to you?” Maeve gasped when she saw me drenched in blood and guts. My eyes still burning red with seething rage.
“Vampires! It was Vampires!!! They were dressed as monks!” Remmy screamed hysterically as Maeve tried to console her. She herself was not in any better shape.
A hard pang of rage gripped me from head to toe. Bishop! “Where's Katie?” I screamed at them. All they could do was point back towards the brothel. Kryimsson took off towards the house and I ran as fast as I could behind him. I cautiously made my way inside through the back kitchen door. It was eerily quiet. The smell of smoke and blood hung thick in the air. I took two swords off the wall of the main parlor and proceeded to slowly make my way through the rest of the first floor. Dead clients, human and vampire, lay on the first floor with their throats ripped out. I heard Maeve let out a quiet sob as she saw the extent of the utter carnage in front of her. I frantically searched each room on the first and second floors for Katie. All empty. As I reached the third floor I heard a smothered cry. I ran to our room to be greeted by three robed vampires. They flew at me as I cut them down one by one with ease. Just fledglings. “Bishop!” I screamed out. I was in a blind rage. I cautiously entered our room. At first I didn't see her. Kryimsson was the one to see her first. He grabbed my shirt and pointed to the corner of the room. There my beloved Katie lay in a pool of blood with her back to us. Her clothes had been torn from her body. It was obvious they took her and used her for their sick pleasure. Bite marks covered her delicate flesh. I dropped my swords and gently rolled her over. She clung to our daughter Katherine who was dead in her arms. Her little throat had been slit. I grabbed them up in my arms. “Katie! Katie my love, I'm here now. Everything is going to be okay. God no! Please Katie, look at me. Please baby, please open your eyes. Let me see those beautiful emerald green eyes.” I begged.
She weakly stirred a bit in my arms and reached up caressing my face gently. I fumbled with a nearby blanket to cover her naked body. I sobbed as I searched my mind for a way to save her. I looked at Kryimsson. He knew what I was thinking but shook his head “no''.
I looked down at Katie, wiping the hair from her face. Kissing her on the lips I said, “Baby, listen to me. Kryimsson and I are going to give you our blood.” I was becoming frantic.
“No my love.” Katie answered in a mere whisper.
“No, no, no, no... this can't be happening. God please don't take them from me please. I can't bear it. God please, please, don't take her. I'll work harder. I will repent more. Anything please God don't. I am so sorry I wasn't here to protect you. Oh my beloved wife, please, drink from us, let us give you the gift of life.” I begged.

Looking her in the eyes and I could feel her life aura fading quickly. It felt like my soul was tearing away from me. “Oh, my love, what am I going to do without you? I was so lost until you found me and loved me for who and what I am. Don't leave me baby, please. We have our home to make together. Our life together. I need you. Baby Pierre needs you. Please baby let me give you this gift!”
“Nicholas, my dearest love. I love you, with all my being. But I can't. I can not bear the thought of eternity without ever seeing my kin again. I will always be with you. Don't be sad my love. The time I had with you was a gift from God. You made me feel so loved and fulfilled. I am so happy you loved me. Carry on my dear, please don't mourn me, remember the love and fun we had together. I love you Nicolas. Protect our son. I.... I...love....you.” Her body went limp in my arms and her breathing stopped. I completely lost it. I unleashed a heartbreaking cry of anguish that shattered the windows in the room as I cradled her in my arms. I just rocked back and forth with her in my arms sobbing and asking why over and over. Maeve knelt next to me and held onto me as I clung to Katie and Katherine’s dead bodies.

“The fire is out and I swept the house, there are no mor....” Sebastian said hurriedly as he came running in to see the horror. Kryimsson gently took Katie from my arms and laid her on the bed. I placed our daughter back in her arms and I covered them with a blanket. We went to go find my son. I ran to the nursery only to be confronted by another bloodsucker. I didn't even bother looking for a weapon. This time I unleashed all my anger in a fireball right at him. He went up in flames, screaming as it flew back out of the third story window. I walked over to the bassinet and reached down to pick up my baby boy. His blanket was covered in blood. As I pulled it back I saw that his tiny throat had been slashed like Kathrine’s. I picked him up in my arms and cradled him as I dropped to my knees. “WHY!” I screamed. “Why them, why? Our little miracles. They were innocent. They were no threat to any of them. Katie was no threat. WHY!”I screamed.
I slowly got back to my feet, carrying my son in my arms. Maeve was sobbing as well as Kryimsson. This was just a horrific scene for them. They both followed me back to my room where I laid Pierre in Katie's arms next to Kathrine. All I could do was kneel next to the bed and stare at them, tears of blood staining my cheeks. I was so numb, lost, and afraid of how I would go on without her. All I could do was look at the ravaged, blood covered body of my beloved wife with our dead infant son and daughter in her arms. I burned the image to my mind. Remember this. Remember. Remember. I will get Bishop and his order of vampire monks. I will destroy him. I will destroy them all. Remember their bodies, remember what you are seeing before you. Remember. Remember. Remember.

“I will destroy Bishop O'Mannan and all that follow him. This is war.” I said in a low, almost inaudible, whisper through my sobs. Rage soared through me. Suddenly I felt like I had to get out. I stood and the wings sprung open from my back.

“Take care of my beloved and darling twins. I will be back later. I have someone I need to find.” And off I went up into the sky. For the next several hours I searched all the places I believed Bishop could be hiding but was unable to locate him. And going to the monastery alone would be suicide. Trust me, I did think about it for a split second. Dejected and exhausted I flew back to the brothel. Clean up had already begun when I got back. House maids were scrubbing the blood stains out of the rugs and off the walls. The male servants helped dispose of the dead bodies that littered the lower rooms. I went to go check on everyone. Pierre and Lady Char were still extremely shook up. Pierre ran into my arms and sobbed. I held him as tightly as I could. “It's all okay now. You are safe my love. Are you badly hurt? What did they do to you my poor beloved Pierre?” I cut my wrist and offered him my blood. It was the first and only time he ever fed from me. His wounds began to heal quickly. But he still was in shock and couldn’t speak.

“We were in the middle of training a new prospect for a Confessional when they broke in. They grabbed the poor girl and ravaged her. Pierre tried so hard to save her but was overwhelmed. They began to try and ravage him as well but something else caught their attention and they flew off. It must have been when you all came to save us.” Lady Char said in a shaky voice.

Mother Superior was a bit banged up but was in good shape. Brother Leo on the other hand was not. It was obvious they meant to take him out. His wounds were close to life threatening. I took him up in my arms and bit into my wrist. Placing it gently to his lips I let him feed. Rapidly he began to heal and grow younger. I let Mother Superior feed as well. After I held onto Pierre to comfort him. I looked around the room for Katie. And like a bullet to the heart I remembered. Her bloodied face flashed before me. Letting out a heartbreaking howl I let go of Pierre and ran back up to the bedroom. Katie had been laid out on the bed, with baby Pierre and Kathrine nestled in her arms. I fell to my knees and sobbed. “Oh my beloved how I have failed all of you. I am so sorry I couldn't protect you. I will never forgive myself. Ever! I will avenge you and our wee ones my beloved. I will tear him and all of his flock apart with my bare fucking hands! I swear this to you my love. My dear Katie. Oh God why? Why them? Why them? Why God? They were innocent. Oh God help me. We made a deal!!!” Pierre clung onto me as I wailed in sorrow. I was utterly inconsolable.

The next day Mother Superior and Brother Leo it best we lay them to rest as soon as possible. None of us knew whether it would be another attack. I wanted them to bury Katie and our little angels in the back garden I created for her. All of them lovingly laid out in a white satin lined coffin. Katie dressed in her wedding gown, Kathrine and Pierre nuzzled in their mama’s arms. They looked so at peace as if they were just sleeping and would wake up any minute. Why couldn’t this all be just a bad dream. We all stood in the pouring winter rain as they were laid to rest. Pierre held onto my arm for comfort. I couldn’t feel it. I stood numb, a blank look on my face and vacant eyes. I was an empty shell. Sebastian made them a beautiful headstone which we placed on top of the grave, it read:

“A Beloved wife and mother robbed of her precious life by the vile deed of murder

“Katherine Siobhan Kent Taylor b. Aug 7 1763 – d. Nov 1 1786

and her infants,

Pierre Rideau Taylor.

Katherine Maeve Taylor

b. Sept 3 1786 – d. Nov 1 1786

As her inconsolable husband and father of her children grieves this great loss,

May they sleep the angel’s sleep in peace as their deaths are avenged.”

For weeks on end I would sit and drink in the empty home I had bought for us or in the little garden I had created for Katie staring at the tombstone. I wandered the banks of the Mississippi like a lost ghost. I spoke to no one. I didn't eat, I didn't sleep, I didn't bathe. When I did finally collapse I slept on top of their grave. Sebastian begged me to call for council on how to get justice for Katie, the babies, and the carnage brought upon the brothel and Abbey. But I was too lost in a bottle of rum and my grief. Slowly the “House of Other Worldly Delights'' was repaired to its original glory, and life seemed to go on. My life on the other hand was in shambles. I wanted blood. I wanted revenge. I would stand, drinking across the street from the monastery as the murderous vampires slept in their coffins. Staring at the building in my drunken stupor. Concentrating I would creep into the dreams of his new fledgling monks and torment them with visions of them burning alive in their coffins. I could feel Bishop seething from the other side. The both of us biding our time. Our war would come.

The Hidden War in Nola

When the Order of the Old Blood attacked the Abbey, burning it to the ground and killing almost all of the ancient ones who slumbered there, it rocked the vampire community in New Orleans to its core. Mother Superior had gone back to Ireland to her ancestral land to go into deep slumber. She was tired of all the death and fighting. Lady Char and Pierre had stayed with us for a few weeks before leaving for Paris. It greatly saddened me to see them go, especially Pierre. He did not take the attack well and became a bundle of nerves. I tried my best in my sober moments to try and help him, but I couldn’t even help myself. At the same time I was so utterly broken I could not be what he needed any longer. It was not fair to him to keep him there with me, no matter how much it comforted me. Also being Lady Char's ever faithful servant and lover, he went with her. We shared one last night of passion before he left. It was the first bit of comfort I allowed myself after Katie's death.

Things exploded again between the smaller covens of the world and New Orleans seemed to be ground zero for their war. Kind of like today's turf wars among gangs. With all the renegades and old ones coming into America, smaller covens also began springing up and fighting for their little spot in the vampire city of America. Most feared that the newly founded coven by Bishop would bring the old powerful ones into his war. If that were to happen it would not end well. I was very positive about that much. I don't know how I knew, but I just knew. Ships with human cargo came into port every week bringing more and more souls to feed and cater to the growing numbers of vampires that were now residing in the warmth of the American South.

Sebastian and I would talk in length about my anger and frustration. I finally broke down and petitioned the elder council of the coven about taking action against Bishop and his monk brood. They refused to act against him. When I would push for logical reasoning, they would just quote coven laws. Even with Maeve being the head of the coven she too refused to take action. Perhaps she feared her uncle more than she wanted to publicly admit. For her it wasn't much of a loss when he attacked the brothel. She was able to easily rebuild. To the outside world all they knew and saw was a raging fire that dreadful night. None were aware of the carnage that lay inside. I on the other hand felt I had lost everything in the world I loved. It finally came down to the point that if they would not act then we would. Together, Sebastian and I, on the anniversary of my children's birth, started attacking the Order of the Old Blood's outer lying safe houses. Killing off their fledglings. We enlisted the help of Kryimsson as well. He liked this idea, he liked it a lot. He always said that at times rules were meant to be broken. If there was ever a time to do so, this was it. While we were at it we would disrupt their food chain as well. Being former food for vampires myself, I would make it my mission to help free them from these monsters. Then, take the slaves to freedom up into the free states up north through the Mississippi River. I knew the risk I took helping them escape, but it was something I had to do. Even with knowing it was against human laws as well. Regardless, no one deserved to live like that, no one. Under Kryimsson's direction we would raid the hiding places of these covens, slaughter all that we could and help the innocent reach freedom. Sebastian and I would be in there maybe all of ten to fifteen minutes and the safe house would be cleared. Afterward we would burn the place to the ground. Turning all evidence into ash. My new gifts made this easy. All I had to do was concentrate, envision what I wanted to do and it happened. We were very careful to make sure our identity was well hidden. We purchased a little sloop and gathered a tight crew of twenty men. All human and ex slaves themselves and were more than ready to help with the cause. We painted her black, and hung black sails to hide us at night. We found a nice little hiding spot in the swamps to tuck our ship when we were not conducting a raid. We dressed in all black and wore ghost-like masks over our faces. Somehow we ended up with the nickname the “Anges déchus de la mort” aka “Fallen Angels of Death” given to us by those we aimed to destroy. We gave no quarter. We went to great lengths to not let anyone in the Coven of Lilith and Cain know what we were doing. It went against the treaty between the covens. But at that moment, I didn't care. And neither did Bishop. That was clear when he tried to burn down the brothel and murdered my wife and children. No, this was war now. A private war between Bishop and I. He had done what he promised. He took my world away from me. Visions of Katie covered in blood with Kathrine in her arms flashed. My little boy, Pierre, slaughtered in his bassinet. Remember what he did to them. Remember. Remember.

Maeve and I had begun to become extremely close after Katie died and Pierre left. I found great comfort in having her around me. There was something that had always drawn me to her, even back at the monastery. At the same time I was confused by the way I felt between the incredible need I had for her and the grief I still held for Katie.

But there were those times I had to get away, go somewhere, go anywhere. And something was bothering me deeply that particular night. I saw an apparition of Katie standing in the garden behind the brothel. I woke in a cold sweat after having one of the nightly terrors I had of that fateful day. Quietly I slipped out of Maeve’s bed, dressed and left the brothel to wander the docks for hours trying to shake the visions of my dear love Katie. An old comfortingly familiar scent caught my attention. I followed it and found myself standing in front of an opium den. It had been about two years since I had last been in one and that didn't end too well. But things got the better of me and I walked in, handed the guy my money and was led to a small room, handed a pipe and left to my own demons. I took a deep breath, lit the pipe and let the smoke fill my lungs. I laid back on the bed as I let out the hit. I took another and another until I felt my body relax. I put down the pipe and closed my eyes and rode that dragon letting all leave my mind.

I'm not sure how long I was under the dragons spell but I knew I had to get back. Maeve was probably a bit concerned to suddenly find me gone when she woke. My head was still in a pretty heavy fog as I gathered my stuff and walked out into the blinding sunlight. By the position of the sun I could tell it was mid afternoon. As I made my way back to the brothel I ran into Kryimsson. It seemed he was out looking for me. It was pretty unlike me to just up and disappear like that and must have given him quite a start as well. He stopped and looked at me. A disappointing frown formed on his lips as he let out a huge sigh. I knew he knew where I was and I was still pretty doped up. I looked at him and walked past him quickly saying,“I'm sorry, it won't happen again.”

He caught me by the arm and swung me around to face him. He was pretty pissed. “Look I don't know what happened but you can't just disappear like that. Maeve was quite upset when she woke and you were gone without a word. Do you understand the thoughts that rushed through my mind? It's been over a year since the uprising and things have been calm, but you're still....” He trailed off catching himself from almost saying something he didn't want to say or tell me.

“I'm still what?” I asked puzzled

“Never mind, all that matters is that you're safe. And stay out of those fucking dens! Dammit Nicholas. You were doing so good. If you feel the need, talk to me or Sebastian, anyone. Just don't fall back into those places again.”

“I'm still what?” I asked again.

“Nothing, it's nothing, let's get back.” I understood his fear. I didn't want to fall back into that old habit again either. Last night was just a moment of extreme weakness. But there was something he wasn't telling me. It was the same feeling I got before the attack on the brothel. The thought of it all made my heart ache with such pain.

“I'm sorry Sire. I promise it won't happen again. I hit a weak moment. Things just, well, it all kinda got to me. Katie and the babies death, it gets to be a bit much sometimes. I also know there is something you know you aren't telling me and I think you owe it to me as my Sire to tell me if it concerns me. I'm tired of people keeping things from me.” I said to him.

“Nicholas, it's nothing, really. I was just worried about you.” He answered hurriedly.

I knew he'd eventually tell me what was on his mind and why my short disappearance freaked him out so badly. I didn't really want to see Maeve in my current condition but I had to confront this situation sooner or later. I was still pretty high and figured I could handle it a bit better at another time. I kept my distance from her for about two days as I tried to come up with a good enough excuse to end up in an opium den. I knocked on her chamber door softly. There was no answer so I slowly opened her door to find her nose deep in a book. The sound of the door closing caught her attention. She looked up at me with those beautiful eyes and I fell to her feet, placing my head on her lap. Tears streamed down my face as I begged her for forgiveness. I felt horrible being afraid of her.

“I'm sorry I up and left the other night. I don't know how to handle the loss of Katie and the babies sometimes and it gets the better of me. I love you so deeply I can't bear the thought of being without you either. And you are engaged to Demitri and I know he is not pleased about our feelings for one another. The thought of losing another I love and cherish so much frightens me to the core. I am sorry my beloved flower, I handled my grief and fear wrong, I will continue to find better ways to cope than turn to old vices.”

She took my face in her hands, wiping away the tears. She smiled at me letting me know she understood. “There is no reason for you to apologize to me. I'm sorry you didn't tell me sooner. I can't imagine my life without you as well. I need you too much. Yes, I am betrothed to Demitri but it is you who truly holds my heart. I have to marry him, for the coven’s sake, it's for the best. But I promise I will always protect you and keep your secrets till my dying days my love.”

“What secrets?” I asked. Her comment caught me off guard.

“Come now my darling, did you honestly think I wouldn't find out who the 'Anges déchus de la mort' really were? The date the first attack happened was a dead giveaway my boy. Please, don't worry. None other than myself knows. But please, I need you to stop. Please do not push Bishop’s hand. We are not prepared for war. Not just yet. Be patient my love.”

Her words shocked and frightened me at the same time. Now that she knew it would make my revenge harder. Even with her asking me to stop, I had no intentions to. I was not going to wait for the coven to get their shit together. I felt they had failed me. I could no longer trust or wait for justice. Her words frightened me because now this put her in danger. Also if the elders found out she knew all along they could force a coup and they could take the coven away from her. We were going to have to be even more extra careful now.

Never Saw it Coming

It was Samhain evening 1787, I was packing my gear for another trip up the Mississippi with my “cargo” when Maeve came to my room to talk. I could tell something was really bothering her. I stopped what I was doing and I took her in my arms, holding her close.

“What's wrong my love?”

“I've received word that the elders believe you are responsible for all of the attacks against the Order of the Old Blood.”

“There is no possible way. Sebastian and I have only been moving smaller shipments of sugar up the Mississippi. You worry too much. I don't know where they are getting their information from but it's untrue.”

“Nicholas I'm serious. Please. Don't go tonight. I have such a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. Please don't go.”

“Maeve, nothing will happen. Look at me. It's okay love. Really.”

“Dammit Nicholas! Why must you always push!” She scolded me as tears swelled up in her eyes. “I swear if you go we are through!”

“Love, nothing is going to happen to me. Come on, we both know I can survive anything thrown my way.” I answered with a sly smile.

“I can't do this with you anymore! You never listen to reason! I won't be able to save your ass if something does go wrong. Do you understand that?” She yelled as she pushed me away.

“Are you suggesting I can't handle myself? I have survived Rhavan and Bishop, more pirate raids than I can count and prison. I survived despite all those who have tried to take me out.” “Nicholas even the largest beast can be taken down with enough spears.”

“Every other time we have gone out you knew the danger we headed into and you sat back without protest before.” I said back sternly to her. My ego was definitely in charge in that moment.

“Always the insolent child!” She yelled, slapping me then stormed out of my room.

I hated when she would call me that. Why couldn't she just trust me? I stood in silence as I rubbed my cheek. She had never been like this before. I walked over and sat on the edge of my bed and thought long and hard about what she said. What if she was right? What if it was a set up? After some time I decided to not do the run. I walked down the hall to her room. As I was about to knock on the door I heard Maeve and Demitri talking.

“Please Maeve, calm down. He's too young to understand. He has also been through quite a lot recently. It hasn't been a year since, well, you know.”

The door was slightly ajar. Letting my curiosity get the better of me I peeked in. Demitri held Maeve in his arms as she cried. He kissed her on the top of the head.

“I could never understand what you see in him. For as short of a time you have known him you allow him too many liberties. You know all of this would be resolved if you would just set a date.”

“Please, Demitri not now.”

“I'm sorry my precious. You're right. This is not the time. Would it make you feel better if I went to talk to him?”

“Would you? Do you think it would stop him?”

“I don't know but it's worth a try. Anything to see you smile.” He kissed her passionately. I had seen enough. I walked back to my room in a near rage. A few moments later there was a knock on my door.

“Come in Demitri.”

My back was to him when he entered. I didn't know what to say to him. He put his hand on my shoulder to turn me towards him. I couldn't look at him. I knew what their conversation was really about. He had been begging her for months to marry him. And watching them kiss just made me even more angry. Fine if they want to be together then they can. I thought to myself.

“She's a woman. You know how they can overreact. I believe in what you are doing Nicholas. It's very important work helping to free slaves. It amazes me the humanity you embrace although you are not a human. So far from what one of your race truly is.”

His comment made me choke. How did he find out? I think my heart actually stopped for a second. She swore she would keep it secret. Then again, it was Demitri. I trusted him with my life, so I wasn't too worried he knew. I wanted to stay angry about what I had just witnessed but I couldn't. It was nearing the time I had to be at the docks. I was still not sure if I was going, but I had to go and meet up with the others either way. “Do you really think I should still go?”

“Yes, you should. Now hurry. I will handle Maeve. We will see you tomorrow at breakfast as usual?” I nodded, grabbed my bag and left out the door.

All conditions were right. The night sky was bright with stars and a full moon. I got to the boat before Kryimsson and Sebastian and the rest of the crew and decided to go check it to make sure it was ready to sail. As I was checking on the supplies down in the hull when I heard a gunshot ring out in the air. I threw on my mask quickly and headed up to the deck. I poked my head up as a shot whizzed past my ear. I ducked and tried to see where the shooting was coming from. I loaded my pistols and readied myself for a fight. A torch came out of the darkness towards my boat. It was a group of members from the former Coven of Cain who had not joined when the covens joined. “Come down off that boat!” A voice yelled from the dock. Another shot grazed my neck. I was able to scramble to the side of the boat and got off a couple of shots until a bullet came through the hull and hit me in the upper thigh hitting close to the artery. Blood began to pour out so I took off my sash and wrapped my leg as tight as I could to slow the bleeding. They must have already been hiding on the boat because I never saw them coming. A bunch of vampires ran up behind me and dragged me off the boat as others boarded, throwing some sort of liquid all over the deck.

“What the fuck are you doing?” I yelled at them.

Someone ripped the mask from my head revealing my identity.

“Nicholas Taylor why am I not surprised it's you.” Said a tall man known as Lieutenant. Ah, The Lieutenant, I should have known he would be involved. A former soldier in George Washington’s army who fought in the Revolutionary War. I am not sure how he got the nickname ‘Lieutenant’ since he never reached that rank. Tall, approximately 6’3” and his build matched who still wore his uniform. His hair was dark brown and had hazel colored eyes. Bishop found him drunk in some gutter and promised him what all vampires promised in exchange for him to lead his army of ragtag monks. We had been dodging him and his men for over four months as we attacked Bishops safe houses and hiding places.

“You are coming with us for crimes against your own. ”

“What are you talking about? Bishop O'Mannan started this when he murdered my family you fucking bastards. When I get my hands on you I am going to tear each one apart with my bare fucking hands. Do you hear me!!!” I screamed at him as I reached for a hidden gun in my coat. Rage began to build inside me. I could feel the heat coming from my skin.

Lieutenant flashed his fangs and flew at me, pinning me to the dock as I pulled my pistol, knocking it from my hand. I flipped him off me and somehow was able to get to my feet and reach the shore. Trying to keep my balance I readied for the next attack. A group of twenty or more vampires emerged from the shadows around me. All of them members from the former Coven of Cain. Why did I not detect them near me? I started to really regret not listening to Maeve. I was able to let loose a few spells killing at least ten before I was overwhelmed. Out of the shadows stepped Demitri and stood next to the Lieutenant.

“I thought this was about to go bad there for a moment.” I said to him in a nervous voice. He just stood there staring right through me. Something didn't seem right with this whole situation. Suddenly the

“Demitri” I yelled to him as they grabbed me up to my feet.

He looked at me with a pitiful look. “Arrogant boy. Did you really think I would let you continue to put my Coven in danger?”

“But they are the enemy!” I screamed at him.

“That may be true, But you my dear, lovely boy, you are the bigger threat. And sometimes your greatest enemy can become your strongest ally when it comes to a common foe. So I have asked the Lieutenant to join with us to stop you and your little merry group of Fallen Angels of Death. You are a danger to us all. You are too young to ever understand. Rhavan made a very big mistake when he turned you into one of our kind. I have watched the destruction you have laid with your own hand on our kind, And I can't risk you destroying the coven. Maeve and I have worked too long hard and fought too many wars to get here and we are not about to let a mere boy bring it all crashing down. If we give you to Bishop, he will stop attacking our coven and it’s members and we will do the same in turn. You are what he wants.” Dimitri said coldly.

It all became very clear to me all of a sudden. “This has nothing to do with what's best for the coven. Or how young I was when I was made into this abomination! It’s all about Maeve. You want her all to yourself!”

He didn't like that answer and punched me hard in the face. Anger began to rage inside me even more. While Demitri was having his discussion with me, the Lieutenants men were herding a group of humans of all ages onto the boat forcing them down into the hull.

“When Maeve and Kryimsson find out about this they will KILL you all!” I said screaming as I fought to get loose.

“Light the boat!” Lieutenant yelled.

“No, wait! What? No! Please don't do that! Please!” I begged.

“This is all because of your own actions. You knew the risk you took. Plus what's a few useless humans in return for the hundreds of our kindred you burned alive.” Lieutenant said coldly.

“Please, there are children on that boat! Don't do this! Please! They are innocent. I'm begging you. Take me! Don't do this! Just let them go. Do whatever you want to me, just let them go.” I panicked.

The more I struggled to get free the more they laughed at me. One of the vampires threw a torch onto the deck. I began to hear the terrified screams and cries of the women and children trapped down in the hull. I looked back at Demitri who looked on horrified.

“Is this what you wanted?” I yelled at him. He grabbed Lieutenant by the arms and spun him around. “ You have gone too far! The plan did not include this!” He yelled at him.

“Ours did.” he answered coldly.

“You bastards! You fucking bastards!” I screamed at him as I was forced to my knees.

My leg was throbbing and I could start feeling the effect from the loss of blood. But I kept fighting to get to my boat.

“Let me go! Noooooo! Noooooo!” I screamed out. I was finally able to break free and ran for the water, wading in the best I could to get to the boat. Something slammed into my back causing my legs to give out beneath me. I reached back and my coat was drenched in blood. I had been shot in the back. They grabbed me and dragged me back to land. They proceeded to stomp, kick and beat me. Somehow I was able to roll over to my stomach to try to protect my head and face better. Someone grabbed my hair pulling my head up, forcing me to watch the burning bodies as they jumped from the boat. I freaked. “No!” I screamed over and over. Sobs wracked my chest as the cries of the children echoed in my head. I reached out to Demitri for help but he just kicked my hand away. With my legs dead, the loss of blood and the beating I just took its toll on me physically. I couldn't fight back any longer. I pretended to pass out. Staying alive was now my main concern. Revenge would come later. They pulled my bloody coat and personal effects off of me and handed them to Demitri.

“The deal was for the kid and nothing else, why did you have to do that?”

“To send a warning to any others who think they can take out Bishop. Now go and tell them exactly what I said. You went to tell him that it was maybe best to not go out tonight after all and found that the boat was hit by a group of rogue vampires and burned in the middle of the Mississippi. Nicholas was attacked at the shoreline and this was all that could be found. Our business with each other is done.” Lieutenant instructed him.

They grabbed me up and dragged me to a waiting carriage and threw me in, where I was bound and gagged. I couldn't believe what had just happened. This all had to be just a bad dream. Just a dream I tried unsuccessfully to convince myself. Why hadn't I listened to Maeve? How could I not see Demitri's betrayal coming? It was then it hit me like a ton of bricks, he was the traitor. He was the one who must have been working with Lieutenant. He climbed in sitting next to me, and we rode off. Not soon after the carriage stopped. Lieutenant slapped me awake and grabbed me by the hair, dragging me across his lap to the tinted window. We watched as Demitri walked up the street and entered the brothel. Maeve came running to the door to greet him. He handed her my belongings and told her what he was instructed. She stood there for a second then collapsed just inside the doorway sobbing, clutching my coat. She cried out,“No.” Over and over again. I yelled through the gag to her that I was alive but she couldn't hear me.

“Scream all you want, boy. They will never hear you again.” Lieutenant laughed as I struggled to get loose of his grasp. My heart shattered watching her cry.

Kryimsson came to the door to find his sister collapsed in Demitri's arms clutching my bloody jacket. He stood frozen. Tears fell from his eyes as he silently tried to process what Demitri was telling them. He gathered up Maeve in his arms and helped her inside. Rage swelled instantly within me. I pulled myself from Lieutenants grasp and headbutted him as hard as I could breaking his nose. He punched me hard in the side of the head with the butt of his pistol knocking me unconscious to the carriage floor.

Next I remember waking up in immense pain shackled to a table in a dank, cold, dimly lit basement. Panic struck at my heart. A man was digging the bullet out of my back which was close to my spine. I was so weak I couldn't even yell out in pain even if I wanted to. Only a small grunt escaped me.

“I am amazed at how young and innocent you look, but those eyes just scream 'killer'. You've been a hard one for us to catch.” A male voice spoke from the darkness. I couldn't see his face, but I recognized the voice. It was Bishop. He caressed my face wiping away the tears from my eyes.

“Are you in much pain, little one? I hope so. I promise there will be plenty more coming. But not in the way you expect it to. And when we are done with you, you will beg for death. We have such wonderful torturous plans for you blessed child of Lilith.

The man finally finished digging the bullets out of me, stitched me up and left me shackled to the table. I must have been pretty out of it because I never noticed Demitri standing in the shadows. After everyone had left he came over to the table and looked down at me sadly as I laid there helpless. All I could do was look back at him. My eyes desperate, begging for help. Even with his betrayal I prayed he’d have a change of heart. He reached down and caressed my cheek and gently brushed the hair away from my eyes.

“Why? Why did you really do it Demitri? Was I really that much of a threat to your relationship with Maeve? Is that it? I'll leave! I will leave here and never look back. I swear this to you Demitri, just let me go, I'm begging you!” I urged him pleadingly.

“My heart does break seeing you like this. I get no pleasure from it. I actually like you, my boy. I really do. I owe you my life. It's just... it's just it's all beyond my control.” He answered coldly.

“Don't leave me here, please”. I struggled to say.

“There is nothing I can do. There is no other way my young friend. It's beyond my control. ” He said with tears in his eyes.

“Why did you turn against us?”

“I didn't turn against the coven, I did this all for the Coven of Lilith and Cain. I turned against you. You gave me no choice, it was beyond my control”.

“Why do you keep saying that?!? What do they have on you?”

“Again, it's about you. You gave me no choice. You should have just left it well enough alone. But you pushed a war with Bishop putting all in great danger. Now that he has you he has sworn he will let us be. I did what was best for the coven. And as I said as much as it truly breaks my heart to see you like this, I guess in a way it does bring me a small bit of pleasure. For now Maeve will be mine and only mine. I do love you Nicholas. And I am very grateful to you for freeing us, but this is just how it has to be. It is beyond my control.” He bent down and kissed me softly on the forehead and turned to walk out of the room.

“Demitri don't leave me!” I begged. “Please! Demitri!” I screamed out as the door locked behind him. Enraged, I fought to get free of the shackles. I screamed his name until my voice gave out. My legs were totally useless. I pounded on that table top with my fists until they bled hoping someone walking by would hear me. I must have eventually passed out because the next thing I remembered was being lifted up and carried up into an attic room. The rafters were covered in Christian and alchemy symbols and creole writing along with the walls and floors. There they hung me by a rafter by my arms in front of a boarded up window. More symbols and lettering covered the boards on the window. A dark figure walked past me and tore off a few of the boards from the window.

“Look down in that direction. Towards the garden there. Does it look familiar to you?” Lieutenant asked.

Looking down and through the slots of the shutters it was the back of the brothel. I looked back at him furious. He laughed at my reaction.

“Good. Bring that over here.” He said pointing to a strange device with shackles and gears. My ankles were strapped into the contraption and his lackey turned the gears causing the shackles to pull my legs towards the floor. I yelled out in pain as I could feel my spine stretching. This continued until a sickening crack echoed through the room. My spine had snapped under the pressure. I passed out. There they left me in front of the window so I could see the garden through the slots of the shutters. When I came around I could see Maeve dressed in all black roaming the garden like a ghost as she held my coat close to her heart. Kryimsson sat in the garden on a bench drowning his grief with a bottle of whiskey. I screamed out to them over and over again.

“They can't hear you. We have made sure no one can pick up your energy or scent. It was a very easy spell actually. All we needed was some of your blood. You can thank Maeve for discovering it and Demitri for giving it to us.” Bishop spoke from behind me. “All these symbols and scripture around you are what keep you trapped here. And there is no way to break it unless we decide to. You will stay up here for as long as I feel like. Or maybe I will burn this place to the ground with you in it. I guess you will have to just wait and see.”

He kicked me hard in the back causing shooting pain and walked out laughing. Gods I hated him and wanted to rip his throat out. I had to find a way to escape.

All Is Not What It Seemed

Over the following months I withered away in that miserable attic, starving and tortured for Bishops enjoyment. I was fed to his new army of vampire clergy. At times I was released from hanging from the rafters and used by Bishop and his fledgling's for their sick sexual gratification. Since I was unconscious or extremely out of it from starvation, and loss of blood I had no idea of what was really happening to me. And I am grateful for it. But there were the times where I had visions of a horned demon using and abusing my body. When I woke there were no marks on me other than the symbols drawn all over my skin.

Meanwhile, Sebastian was convinced I was still alive and began to make waves. He believed since a body had been recovered, I had to be alive somewhere. Plus he could still feel my life vibration. He and I had a unique bond. We could always sense each other, even from miles apart. I could hear his constant calls, but I was warded and I could not answer him back. He had gone down to the river to the spot where I had supposedly died. He said to Kryimsson something there didn't feel right. Kryimsson brought forth an inquiry into my disappearance to the coven elders which made Demitri very nervous.

One evening I was jolted awake by the Lieutenant slapping me. He placed a gag in my mouth and double checked that my binds were still tight. As I came around more I could smell the faint scent of smoke.

“Your insufferable fledgling's sniffing around is getting too close. It is time you burn just like you burned all of Bishop’s children! I know he had other plans for you but some are getting too close for comfort and I will not go down for this.” He said as he took out back through the attic door. The room soon began to flood with thick black smoke. I knew I had to find a way out. I began to cut the palms of my hands with my nails in order to soak the rope around my wrists so I could pull out of them. As soon as I got one wrist loose Bishop suddenly appeared before me in the smoke. I was terrified of what he may do to me as he saw I was somewhat free of my binds. Without a word he took out a blade and dragged it across his palm letting the blood drip to the floor. All of a sudden it felt like a heavy weight lifted off me. The spell holding me was now broken. I was able to release my other wrist causing me to crash to the floor hard knocking the air from my lungs. The Lieutenant came out of nowhere at me and we struggled as the anger I had inside fueled my strength. I was able to get the better of him even in my weakened state. Taking all the rage held, I punched and slammed his head repeatedly on the floor. The thick smoke was starting to fill the room causing us both to struggle to breathe. I looked him straight in the eyes as I came in for the kill and sunk my teeth deep into his neck tearing out his throat and fed until I no longer felt his heartbeat. Instantly I got sick and threw up the blood I just ingested. Pushing his body aside I pulled myself the best I could towards the attic door. Bishop was nowhere to be found. The thick smoke filled the room and I couldn't catch my breath any longer and collapsed in the doorway.

Someone held my face tightly, shaking me. I tried my best to open my swollen eyes. “Awaken.” Bishop said as he stood in front of me. Still holding my face tightly he looked me straight in the eyes and said, “You were a hard one to catch, and the Lieutenant almost ruined my grand plans for you. And such wonderful plans we have for you. Perhaps we will start by skinning you alive. Or maybe send a piece of you back to your petulant fledgling bit by bit. ”

I couldn't contain my fear. I was in big trouble and they took extra precautions to keep me weak. For the first time in my life I saw no way out of the situation. I was laying on a cold metal table. Steel cuffs were placed over my ankles, wrists, and throat. I could no longer contain the panic that swelled inside me. “Is that fear I see in your eyes? I don't think I have ever witnessed this before. Oh, how splendid.” Bishop sneered as he looked down at me. My soot covered body was washed from head to toe. After, Bishop drew religious and alchemical formula symbols to suppress my magic and my incubus powers. “I swear Bishop I am going to kill you with my bare hands!” I hissed at him.

All he did was just laugh, “Oh, my boy, you don't know the half of it. You are never making it out of here. Now that I possess you, we will be the most powerful coven in the world.”

“I will NEVER help you! There is no way in hell!”

“Ahh, but you already are my boy, you already are. It's not your magical powers that make you the most powerful weapon to have, it's your blood. The blood of life. You there! Bring her to me!” He ordered one of his fledgling's to bring over a very old woman. “She is an ancient one. Now watch!” The woman bit into my arm and fed fast and strong. I could feel the energy fading from me quickly. When she pulled away her face turned young and beautiful once again. Her strength was greater than she had ever possessed. Her transformation was amazing. I couldn't deny that.

“This! This is what makes you the most powerful weapon. With your blood I will raise an army of ancients and we will incinerate all who oppose us. Starting with my niece and nephew first, then all the members of the Coven of Lilith and Cain. You only have yourself to blame. You wanted a war with me, well here we are, and it seems to me you are on the losing side.”

“You started this when you murdered my wife and children you fucking bastard!”

“On the contrary, you started this when you woke those who should not be woken. I told you back then I would ruin you. I would take all you care about. Speaking of, I'm sure you haven't heard, Maeve and Demitri married just last week. Isn't that lovely. I thought you could use a little happy news.” He cackled.

It felt like I got punched in the heart. It couldn't be true. I felt hot tears swelling up in my eyes. Bishop laughed as he saw my reaction. “Awwwww you poor boy. Did you seriously think you were something more than her plaything? Her bet-kay? Oh you sorry delusional boy. You have been locked away in that attic for four months and no one has come looking for you other than your wretched fledgling. You have been under their noses this whole time and they chose to move on without you. Yes, the Lieutenant almost ruined everything last evening. Thank you for discarding him for me. I was going to do it myself for his deliberate disobedience when he set fire to the attic we were keeping you in. Then again, that is the trouble with hiring mercenaries, sometime they have their own agendas.”

I knew for a fact that at least Sebastian was searching for me. Both Bishop and the Lieutenant confirmed that. I still held out hope that he would find me before Bishop went through with his plans. My mind began to race. Okay, he said I was there for four months, which now made it late February 1788. Trying to wrap my mind around how much time had passed and what Bishop had said to me had my brain working overtime. Suddenly something caught my attention in the far corner of the darkened room. Two glowing eyes were staring at me. I locked eyes with it. They were the same eyes I was tormented by in my nightmares. Bishop noticed and motioned to it to come forward. Out of the shadows stepped a huge red skinned demon. Short horned, with very little facial hair. It was a young demon. I knew that much. What type, I had no clue. It walked slowly towards me eyeing me like it wanted to eat me. Licking its lips, it's eyes sparkled with flames as he ran his fingers over my skin.

“Oh how I have missed touching you.” It purred in my ear.

What the hell was this beast talking about? I had never encountered its like ever in my life other than in dreams. I was totally confused. Bishop began to cackle loudly.

“Haahahaaa! You haven't figured it out? You really have no clue do you? Kryimsson never told you? Why that sly fox. I gave my nephew less credit than he deserved. Rhavan, your fledgling seems to have forgotten you. Why not reintroduce yourself?” Bishop howled in laughter.

No! It couldn't be. I stared at the eyes of the demon who now was crouched above me sitting on my groin. I had to force myself to breathe. “No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.” was all I could say. I was strapped down and had no way to stop him. He clamped down on my chest with his fangs and fed fast from me bringing me to unconsciousness.

Opening my eyes I found myself floating above my body as I watched the demon Rhavan feeding from me. As I floated my mind went back to the day on the docks with Kryimsson. He knew! He knew Rhavan was still alive. Albeit not in human form, but still he lived. Anger swelled in my core. I would not let them win. I will not go out this way. A bright light began to shine above me, but I was focused on getting back to my body. I closed my eyes again and then opened them, finding myself looking back into his eyes. He climbed off me, leaving me in a drained stupor.

“You will be the new vessel in which your Sire Rhavan will possess as his and come back to us stronger than before. The secret your precious Kryimsson neglected in telling you was when you 'killed' Rhavan you only destroyed his human body. His demonic spirit was able to escape and we were finally able to bring him back up to this earthly plane using your blood. You see, Rhavan is the product of a human vampire mother as you know, the Countess, and a lower demon was his father. The demon side was more powerful, hence the reason Kryimsson was forced to sire his own sibling. Through his experiments and his extensively detailed journals we know how to place his essence within you. Your body is strong enough to handle the ritual, your mind on the other hand we have no use for and plan to destroy it. Rhavan, have your fun with him until you have had your fill. He is weak and possesses no real threat to anyone. Take him one last time. Enjoy him thoroughly. But please, leave a piece for me.” Bishop said sneering.

“I plan to uncle oh I plan to.” Rhavan snickered as he sunk his long talons into my chest, tearing it open. I grunted out in pain. It was all I could do. My body felt paralyzed. I had no clue how or even if I could stop this. Taking his blood covered fingers he went down between my legs and fondled me trying to get a reaction. This was the most terrified I had ever been. I couldn’t think. I couldn’t breathe. Laughing at my utter distress, he smeared his fingers in the pooling blood on my chest using it as lubricant forcing them inside me one by one. I cried out as the skin tore as he stretched me further with more demonic fingers. I had been raped before, countless times by this point in my life, but this was by far the worst. I was being brutalized. Rhavan laughed and licked the tears from my face with his forked tongue. I squirmed and tried to wriggle away from his fingers deep inside me, but he only held me down and fucked me harder driving me to sob and beg him for mercy. This only seemed to fuel his desire and he took my head in his hand and forced his cock in my mouth shoving it in slamming the back of my throat causing me to gag badly. He fucked my mouth until blood began to come from my throat. He came strongly and forced me to swallow his seed. I gagged as it felt like I was swallowing glass and threw it all back up instantly. Licking the blood and semen from my lips he placed his cock back in my mouth until he became hard again. My mind fought hard not to collapse underneath the horror I was experiencing. I thought of Katie. I thought of my children. I thought of my fledgling Sebastian and Maeve's smiling face. I was not going to break. I would not snap. Remember. Remember. Remember.

He tired of abusing my mouth and shoved his giant demon cock into me, tearing me even further. He ravaged me, tearing at my body, biting, abusing me in every way he could think. I could only lie there and take it like a rag doll. Rhavan began to whisper something in my ear. At first I couldn't understand what he was saying because I was so out of it, but soon enough it became all too clear.

“I am not at all surprised Kryimsson never told you that you didn't kill me. Family loyalty runs deep. And you were never family, just property. My property. When Bishop told me you had taken a wife, I just had to meet her. I must compliment you Nienar, she was quite the catch. I am surprised someone like her, a God fearing good little Irish Catholic girl, marrying a walking terror like you. You definitely did well for yourself. Working for the Abbey was something I never thought you had in you. You were always such a prude. Living the life of a wealthy clergyman. You never cease to surprise me my darling Nienar. That's what I loved most about us, this game we play. And every time you find a way to amaze me. But none of that matters now since this is where our game ends. After I am done fucking you to death I will take this strong, fit body as my own. Bishop will complete the ceremony and you will no longer exist. Oh, all around will believe that it is still you but we know different, don't we. From there I will use your gifts and take over the Coven of Lilith and Cain and become the strongest most powerful coven in the world. Ruled by the most powerful vampire to ever walk this earth.”

No. No. No. No. I repeated in my mind over and over. I could not let him get to me. I must survive. He mustn't possess me.

“Your sweet Katie, she was such a tasty morsel. Sweet, innocent blood. Near virginal body. She trembled under my touch as she screamed out for you to save her and your pathetic offspring as I took her, over and over. She kept faith until the very end that you would come to save her, but you failed didn't you. And failed miserably at that, didn't you my dearest fledgling. Your infants by the way were the perfect dessert after taking Katie. Their blood was even sweeter than yours. Pity, I wonder what they could have grown to be. Soon we will be one my dearest Nienar. Soon I will...”

As he babbled on and fucked me close to death he was removing the written symbols and spells via sweat and body friction. The incubus began to feed on the sexual energy Rhavan was extruding. His words, the seething way he spoke about taking my beautiful innocent wife and my miracle babies made me snap. My body warmed to the touch as it turned bright pink. It roared awake. My eyes shot open, blazing with red flames. I began to respond to his rhythm to pull more energy from him as he continued to rape me. I snapped the chains holding me down, taking Rhavan by surprise. Knocking him off me to the floor, I levitated from the table, wings of black spread wide behind me. I soared at him with a speed he could not deflect. With each swoop I slashed at him. He stood absolutely dumbfounded. He had no clue how to stop me now. I could sense it clearly, his confusion. I flew at him knocking him hard against the wall. He slid down to the floor hitting with a thud. I crouched down close to him, watching him like a curious child, my eyes following him as he desperately tried to figure a way out of the room. Unlike vampires who can transform and use any spell they learn, a lower demon only knows what it knows and possesses limited powers. Rhavan and Bishop never took into account all that I had read and learned over the years. I was a sin-eater for God's sake, of course I would know demonology. Brother Leo made sure of it. Perhaps he knew as well that Rhavan still lived, and was secretly giving me the tools to defeat him one day. Well today was that day. Today would be the last day he would ever walk this earth again, in any form. The last day he would ever torment me. His panic rose as the moments passed as I just stared at him. I could feel it. I fed on the fear. Rhavan feverishly spoke spell after spell and they failed one after the other. I began to laugh a very evil deep laugh at his feeble attempts.

“Are you finished, demon? For it is time for you to go back to hell or wherever it is you were spawned from. I am going to send you there once and for all. You were correct about one thing Sire, it ends here, today, in this room, between us Rhavan. You will never torture or haunt my memories ever again. I take revenge for my beloved Katie, my dear, dear, Katie. And for my children who never had a chance at life, Pierre and Kathrine. You took them from me and now I will take your precious life from you, you fuck! It all ends here between us!” I stomped the stone floor with my foot, cracking it beneath me. The room shook.

I continued on toying with him, “Now, how to do it? Do I skin you alive? Ten thousand cuts perhaps? Do I give you back all the pain you have caused me all at once or do I do it slowly? Although I am not sure how much more time alone we have before Bishop discovers us. I do know we do have some time left to play together. Come play with me Sire. Come play with me.” I cackled at him.

Enraged he stormed at me. I easily swatted him away and laughed even more at him as I flew around the room, smacking him on his horned head. Soon I tired of this game of Matador and bull and knocked him hard to the floor. As he lay stunned, I began to speak scripture to banish him from our realm. He screamed out for Bishop as the floor beneath him opened up and fire flew out. His screeching and howling echoed loudly off the walls as he went up in flames. By the time Bishop got to us, the hole in the floor had disappeared, a pile of ashes at my feet that was once Rhavan and a room full of smoke. I had spent all my energy and strength banishing Rhavan that I was caught off guard by Bishops spell casting. My body felt heavy suddenly and I collapsed to the floor in a heap unconscious.

I felt someone slapping me awake. It was Bishop and he was beyond enraged. I had never seen him in such a state. I was strapped back onto the table, this time double the chains.

“A mere precaution now. I very much underestimated you boy. I never thought in a million years you had that kind of power within you. I guess the rumor of you being Lilith's chosen one was correct. No worries, I have taken extra steps to ensure you can not put another stunt like that. We may have sadly lost Rhavan forever, but we still possess you.”

A monk brought in a tray with a white cloth covering it, placing it on a table next to Bishop.

“Do you see this?” He lifted the cloth revealing a long thin bladed knife, a spool of hemp threat, a large sewing needle, bandages and a small ceramic jar with hot tar in it. The smell was nauseating. Bishop nodded to a huge man who was standing off to the side. He wore black trousers with high black leather boots. No shirt and a black hood that covered his face. Like an executioner wears. He walked over and grabbed my right hand and proceeded to break every finger on my hand. I screamed out in agony. He walked over and did the same with the other. Bishop sat back and watched with an air of school boy glee. The steel cuffs were removed and two monks took the bandages and wrapped my broken fingers and formed my hands into fists. The cries of my pain echoed off the walls. Once they were done, they took the hot tar and covered the bandages. My hands felt as if they were on fire and melting. Bishop laughed at my torment.

“Please stop. I can't take the pain. Oh God have mercy on me. Please Lord help me, your humble servant I pray to thee help me!” I wept hysterically. What I was feeling physically and mentally was beyond intense. Moments before I was able to kill Rhavan and now, here I was helpless once again. It was frustrating and terrifying all at once. I should have just killed him and ran. My arrogance got the best of me once again. I was so mad at myself.

“As you can tell we are taking every precaution now when it comes to you and your powers. Pray all you want. You will find no mercy here as you gave my children you needlessly burned. God does not hear you. If he had perhaps your children and wife would have been spared. And once I finish here none will ever hear from you again.” He picked up the needle and threaded it with the hemp thread. I shook my head frantically. The hooded man grabbed my head and held it steadfast. Bishop grabbed my lips and pinched them closed with his fingers. Trying my best to wiggle my head to prevent him from doing what I feared him doing but the man had a tight grip. I writhed in great distress as the needle pierced my lips over and over sewing my mouth shut. I prayed over and over that it all was just a horrible nightmare and I would wake up next to Katie. All of this was just a horrendous nightmare. Where had all my power and strength go I had what felt like only moments before. When he came for my eyes next all the fight left me. I gave up. This was it. He won. There was no way out of this. None. I closed my eyes and wept silently as he sewed them shut. All at once it felt like hundreds of little needles sinking into my skin. I was being fed from as if it were their last meal. I tucked far away in my mind. There was no waking from this nightmare this time. Maeve had moved on. No one had found me yet and I believed none would ever do so. Bishop had won.

The Reckoning

There I laid strapped and chained for the next week, imprisoned in my own mind. Nothing more than a food source and other things for Bishop and his flock. The Order of the Old Blood numbers grew and they began to take down the smaller covens who supported the Coven of Lilith and Cain. Still strongly believing I was alive, even more so seeing the power that Bishop now possessed, Sebastian searched even harder for me. He would later tell me he felt an incredibly strong life vibration come from me when I took out Rhavan. He was able to follow one of the monks and discovered my whereabouts. It seems after I killed Rhavan I was moved and kept at the destroyed Abbey in the tombs. He together with Kryimsson were able to get inside by glamouring themselves to appear as one of the monks of the Order of the Old Blood. When they did find me I was in horrendous shape. The terror that struck their hearts when they saw what Bishop had done to me was unsurpassed. My skin was withered and almost a ghostly gray and covered in scars that looked like symbols. My hair had turned white and brittle. My eyes and mouth now appeared to have healed shut. I was released from the shackles which Kryimsson snapped easily open with his vampiric strength. I'm sure anger had a lot to do with it as well. Grabbing me up from the tomb, we disappeared into the mist. We ended up behind the brothel in the garden. Maeve and Demitri rushed out to meet them. I was told she collapsed in Demitri's arms when she saw my condition. She and Brother Leo did their best to nurse me back to health along with Sebastian and Kryimsson donating their blood to me. Yet, I did not wake. My body had healed as though nothing had ever happened, but my mind was dormant. Brother Leo surmised it was due to all the trauma I had endured since Katie and the babies death to all the physical torture I had taken at Bishops hands. He believed I was in hibernation. Someone always remained by my side on the chance I might awaken.

To say Bishop was less than pleased that I had escaped was an understatement. His rage was seen over the following days as members of his order were found burned to death along with rival coven safe houses and elders. Security at the brothel was at an all time high. It would only be a matter of time before Bishop and his flock would attack. Two guards were outside my door at all times. Maeve, Demitri and the other coven elders had round the clock security and escort at all times as well. Kryimsson was positive someone within the coven had to be giving Bishop information. How else would he know where the safe houses were. No one but a small group had that knowledge. Who it was though he couldn't figure it out. But I knew. He was right there, next to all of us all along. When I was able I would get my revenge on Demitri. Brother Leo sent word to Lady Char in Paris telling her all of what had happened. When Pierre heard he begged her to let him go back to New Orleans. She made arrangements right away and sent him off. From the moment he arrived he never left my side. He sang songs to me in French, read scripture and poetry. In my hibernation his soft melodic voice sounded like an angel's whisper in my dreams. Maeve would beg him to sleep and eat which he would only do reluctantly. One evening he found himself in a moment of despair and began to sob.

“Oh Nicholas mon amour, I missed you so. I am so sorry I left you. I should have never gone to Paris. But I had never been attacked before, or brutalized in any manner until that night Bishops attacked the Abbey. It frightened me to the core. Seeing you in your full glory, wings and all terrified me as well. I did not know how to handle the trauma I went through. Much less, I did not know how to help you either, so I ran to Paris. Oh my beloved, please wake up. Please come back to us. We need you so. I need you.” He kissed my forehead and then on the lips. A small surge of energy went through me. He kissed me again more passionately. His tears fell onto my cheek. My body shuttered and I weakly reached my arms out and embraced him. A sensation of warmth enveloped me from head to toe. Taking in a deep breath I slowly opened my eyes.

“Mon Dieu! You're awake! He's awake! He's awake! Oh mon amour!” He cried out. I was aware I was safe, and it was Pierre whose arms I was being cradled in, but I was still in an odd state of suspended animation. Everything sounded far away. I could see clearly but still could not speak. I seemed to only move instinctively. Kryimsson came in and looked me in the eyes. “Nicholas can you hear me?” I nodded slowly that I could. “Can you see me? Can we see us?” Again I nodded.

“Can't you speak?” He asked. Just then Demitri appeared in the doorway. Staring at him blankly I opened my mouth and all that came out was an ear piercing cry of heart wrenching agony. The trauma of what Bishop had done to me, the demon Rhavan raping me and Demitri's betrayal flooded out. Pierre clutched onto me rocking me back and forth in his arms. “Hush now my sweet. You are safe. You are back in my arms. We will take care of you. All is well now.” He softly whispered as he kissed my forehead and cheeks. Maeve reached out to hold my hand and I pulled away from her. She was Demitri's now. And he was watching me like a hawk. He could very easily set it up for Bishop to come take me away again. I began shaking at the thought of what I had gone through. Pierre looked at her with confusion, she looked back at him sadly.

“Give the young man time to heal mentally. We do not know what Bishop has done other than what we saw physically. And knowing Bishop the way I do, it was nothing pleasant. I will help council him and with all of our love and guidance he will be our Nicholas once again.” Brother Leo said, trying to comfort them.

Gradually over the following days I came out of my strange limbo, but yet comatose state. My loving and devoted Pierre doted on me hand and foot. Fussing to make sure all my needs were met. He talked to me about beautiful things and places. Promising me he would take me back to Paris with him. Always trying to lift my spirits. I clung to him like a child. When he was not near me I would panic.

Maeve kept her distance. I don't think she was aware I knew she was married now. Demitri did all he could to keep her busy with coven business and away from me as well. No one around him had an inkling that he was responsible for me being ambushed. Although he seemed to have begun to drink heavily since I was back.

One early morning after the brothel had shut down he came to visit me in my room knowing I would be alone. He found me in my usual spot, sitting in a chair staring out at the garden towards the grave of my loved ones.

“I am glad to have caught you alone Nicholas. Please, you must believe me when I tell you I am relieved to see you here alive and safe. I hope you have seen the errors in your past behavior and we can move on from this unpleasantness.” He said in a matter of fact tone. He reeked of booze.

I looked him dead in the eyes and growled, “You should be thanking me for not telling them the truth. And I won't for I know how much it would break your new bride's heart. Congratulations by the way, Demitri. You have everything you want. But I warn you now, if you ever harm a hair on her head or put her in danger, I will kill you. Get out of my room and never speak to me again unless we are in the other's presence. Do we understand each other?”

“Very much understood.” He nodded and nervously smiled as he stumbled out my room.

Pierre came back shortly after and found me in a very agitated state. “What is wrong mon amour? You look very upset.”

I stood up and took him in my arms and kissed him hard. I needed to lose myself. I needed him. “I need you. I need you to love me, beat me then fuck me. Please, take me Pierre. Take me! I want to feel pain. I need to feel you inside me.” I purred in his ear. I felt him shudder in my arms as I bit into his neck. Not enough to feed, but enough to cause a little pain.

Mon amour you have never spoken to me this way before. I think I like it.” He responded by grabbing me and forcing me to my knees in front of him. Holding my hair in one hand he pulled out his hard cock and I eagerly took it in my mouth and suckled it. Running my tongue along it, teasing the head. A warmth I hadn't felt in what felt like forever flowed through me. His hand guided my head as I sucked harder and worked the shaft with my hand. A bit of pre-cum hit my tongue making me more eager to pleasure him. His moans filled my ears as I worked him into a frenzy. I quickly brought him to orgasm. I swallowed and savored all of it. Pierre bent down and kissed me tasting himself on my tongue.

“Remove your clothes my beautiful boy”

In an instant they were off. He removed his belt and instructed me to bend over onto the bed. Allowing full access to my backside and nether regions. He laid into it with all he had, whipping me until huge red welts formed. I fed on the pain, loving the stinging warmth after each swat. I moaned in pleasure. It wasn't long before he was inside me and pumping hard. It was rough and euphoric. The incubus part of me strengthened as we continued in our sexual frenzy. He climaxed inside me. Not allowing him to catch his breath I grabbed him and tossed him onto his back on the bed. Pushing his knees up to his chest I entered him. Slowly pushing myself in then thrusting suddenly to the hilt. Pierre cried out in lust as I teased him with my cock. I pounded him hard and fast until I came. It felt like my entire body was wrapped in a warm blanket. We collapsed in each other's arms, sweaty and satisfied. My mind was once again clear and all the remaining aches and pains were gone. I felt oddly whole again. Although my soul felt shattered, I had my love Pierre and I would have my revenge on Bishop soon enough.

There was one more piece of business I had to take care of, Kryimsson. I struggled on how to approach him about it. We hadn't been given much alone time since I was rescued, but his betrayal had to be confronted. Later that day after Pierre and I had our tryst I asked him to tell Kryimsson to come to my room. As I waited for him to come my anger began to rise. The thought of all those times where he would overreact or hint that there was something I was unaware of all made sense now after what I found out from Bishop and seeing Rhavan with my own eyes. If I was made aware I would have taken extra precautions to stay safe. I would have made sure my family was safer than what I had left them in.

Knocking on the door, Kryimsson entered, “Hey kiddo, what's up? Something wrong? I don't like that look on your face. Whenever I see it, it means something not good.” He said nervously trying to lighten the mood. It was not going to work this time.

“You knew.” I said coldly and threw his ring at him. He held it in his hand puzzled.

“What? Why are you giving this back to me?”

“You knew you fucking bastard! You knew he was still alive this whole fucking time and never told me!!! Fuck you Kryimsson! You had no right! Do you know what he did? Did you know he was the one who raped my beloved wife and murdered my children. Did you? You never gave me enough credit. You never thought I could handle the truth? Do you know what that monster did to me before I killed him? Would you like to know? I'm not even going to wait for you to answer you motherfucker!” I screamed at him as I grabbed him by the shirt and placed my palm to his forehead. Using the energy I gather while having sex with Pierre, I held him steadfast. I forced images and all the physical pain I had ever experienced at that demon's hands along with the agony of the loss of my family. He felt and saw it all within a few moments in time. There was no escaping it. I let him go as he collapsed to the floor holding his head sobbing.

“That was for you dearest Sire. May it all haunt you until your dying days. Which we both know will never come. For either of us. Together forever. Truly forever. Right Kryimsson.” I snapped sarcastically and walked out of the room. I went to the local tavern to drown my sorrows. It broke my heart to do that to him, but he deserved it all at the same time.

“A Good Day to Die”

In the very early morning hours before sunrise as everyone was settling in to sleep in their coffins a loud crash came from Maeve's quarters. Her frantic screams echoed through the halls. When I got there Demitri was unconscious and covered in blood, the window had been torn out and Maeve was gone. Sebastian found a piece of paper shoved in Demitri's hand. Snatching it up he handed it to me,

“This game ends now. You know what I want if you want her back safe. A life for a life. You know where to meet me at sundown. Bishop”

I roared out in seething anger. I shoved the note at Kryimsson and told Sebastian what it said. Brother Leo ran in and we filled him in on what was happening. He tended to Demitri as the three of us figured out our course of action. Once we felt we had a plan we set out to put things in motion. But before we went I needed to see Pierre. I ran into him in the hallway on the way back to my room. He was rushing to see what had happened. I took him by the hand and led him to my room. Seating him down on the bed, I held his hands and said, “Bishop took Maeve. I have to go after her. He will spare her if I go to him. Sebastian, Kryimsson and I have a pretty solid plan in place. I need you now more than ever my lover. I need you to feed the demon inside me. I need to be at full strength when I go to battle. Will you help me beloved, mon amour Pierre?” Without hesitation he began to kiss and caress me, undressing ourselves quickly. He knew exactly how to work me into a sexual frenzy. As we climaxed together a bright golden light enveloped us. A feeling of energy I never experienced before surged through my entire body. We laid in each other's arms panting, trying to catch our breaths. I kissed him deeply and passionately. “I love you Pierre. Always remember that. I will be back soon.” I said to him as I got up and dressed. He lay there basking in a post coitus glow. Kissing him again one more time, I grabbed my sword, looked back at my beautiful love one more time and left out the door. I felt invincible.

By the late morning our plan was in motion. We sent out word to the surrounding residence to flee their homes. Danger was coming. At around 1:30pm that afternoon Sebastian set a small fire less than a block away from Jackson Square. The blaze moved quickly towards the center of town. It helped us even more in our effort to surprise Bishop and his sleeping flock that the priest at the church refused to ring the bells because it was Good Friday. As the townsfolk struggled to contain the raging fire, we snuck down into the lower tombs beneath the old Abbey. Kryimsson was able to focus on Maeve's whereabouts. She was shut away in one of the tombs. Now to find which one. Right before we entered I fed quickly from Sebastian taking my fill. I felt more power growing within me by the minute. Wings tore from my back and down I flew. The majority of the Order of the Old Blood were still sleeping in their resting places. Some in tombs, some in coffins, and some lay on the floor where they collapsed when the sun rose that morning. It was easy pickings. With our combined dark gifts we took them all down very easily. Something deep inside me told me this was a set up, but I had to get Maeve out and back to Demitri safely. There was no way I was going to allow her to be harmed in any way. I would not fail this time. He was not going to take another I love away from me. Sebastian was able to find the tomb she was in. They had bricked the wall shut. That too was easily taken apart with our bare hands. The strength of a vampire is one thing but when you add rage to it, it becomes something completely different. Maeve was alive and unharmed. She lay drugged in a deep slumber. I instructed them to bring her back to the brothel. Keep guard on her and Demitri. I was going to confront Bishop once and for all. Today it would end between us. One of us was going to die and I was gonna make damn sure it wasn't me.

Searching the church cautiously, I found him standing behind the altar waiting for me. With a wave of his hand the candles lit throughout. His eyes grew large with a hint of fear when he saw the wings and my fire red eyes. From the left and right Transepts his flock came at me. With my swords in hand I flew up above them and struck them down one by one, slicing their heads off. Bishop looking to take advantage of my being distracted, motioned at someone above him. I quickly looked up as I saw a giant net dropped down on me. I hit the hard marble floor with a clattering crash as my swords slid across hitting the base of the altar. He grabbed up one of them and came towards me cautiously. I shook the dizziness from my head and touched the net, turning it to dust. I stood up and let my wings recess back into me. Bishop stood shocked for the moment. There were now only about a dozen of his flock remaining. I could have effortlessly taken them down in an instant, but my focus was on Bishop. We stood for several moments staring each other down.

“I knew you would come. You are so damn predictable. Petulant boy, you can't beat me. Every time you try you have failed and fail miserably. Even with Maeve taking over the Coven of Cain, none of you can ever destroy me. I told you long ago they couldn't protect you from me. I proved to you that I would take all you love and care for. How is dear young Pierre? I have word you left him alone back at the brothel. Would be such a shame if something befell that beautiful head of his.”

“Don't you dare go after him! You are right Bishop. I have failed in my past attempts, but I promise you on the soul of our Lord. Today you meet your maker.” I threw a fireball towards him which distracted him enough so I could grab one of my swords. He in turn hit me square in the chest with an energy blast which tossed me against the altar. Struggling to catch my breath several monks began attacking me with knives and trying their best to feed from me. Each stab added to my rage. I crouched down into a small ball and let all of my energy build. A bluish light began to grow from within me. With all my might I rose to my knees and opened my arms wide letting the energy flow forth. All around me incinerated on the spot. I dropped back to the floor, spent. It was just Bishop and I now. No more distractions. Giving me little time to gather myself, he came at me with one of my swords, I rolled out of the way just in time. The sound of the steel hitting the marble echoed loudly. I was able to scramble past him and reach my sword by the altar. We were now both armed and squaring off.

“Ah, a gentleman’s game is it?” He swung at me. I deflected it and swung for his legs, catching him above the right knee. He in turn threw a fireball at me which hit the curtains behind me, setting the church aflame. We clashed swords and went at each other with all we had. We both go in some good damage to one another. Fire began to surround us when I almost had him cornered. Kryimsson, Maeve and Sebastian came running in to find my sword at his throat. At the shock of seeing her there and not away from this wretched place I stupidly let my guard down. He pushed me back, causing me to stumble and ran me through the gut. A howl of agony escaped me. I grabbed onto the blade and I yelped as he jerked it upwards towards my sternum. Maeve screamed out my name which caught Bishops attention. He started conjuring an energy blast. I pulled myself off the sword and grabbed his hands as he unleashed the spell. Absorbing all of it, I crumpled to the floor. Bishop cackled in victory. “I told you boy you could never defeat me.”

Blood poured from my stomach and I could feel myself getting tired. Taking his chance to come in for the kill he sprung on top of me and pinned me to the floor, trying to sink his teeth into me. I fought back the best I could to keep him from my throat. Looking above us I saw the candelabra. Without a moment's hesitation I grabbed him and concentrated. Holding him with all I had left as he struggled to drink me dry I growled, “It ends here and now Bishop. See you in hell.” And I spoke the Svartálfaheimr word for drop, 'Kev’. He never saw it coming. The large wrought iron candelabra came crashing down impaling both of us to the floor. Letting out a horrid scream, Bishop died almost instantly, his blood poured into my wounds. I felt as if I was burning to death. Sebastian, Kryimsson and Maeve looked on horrified. Together Kryimsson and Sebastian removed the candelabra off of us and found me barely alive. Sebastian took my sword and cut off Bishop's head, and threw it into the raging fire around us. Blood was seeping from my eyes, ears, nose and mouth and I was choking on the blood flooding my lungs. Somehow I knew this was the end. I was going to die this time. I felt no fear in dying. I actually was ready to embrace it. Kryimsson grabbed me up in his arms and held me close to his chest.

“Why would you do that? Why? I don't understand.” He cried. I struggled to breath. I knew the pike went through my heart. I could feel it fluttering and skipping beats. Looking up at him I said, “I had no choice. It was never going to end if I didn't. Now you all are safe. All will be safe now. The war will end here.”

“I can feed you! All three of us can. Our blood together will save you. Please, let me make things up to you. I beg you.” Kryimsson said, panicking.

“Please Nicholas, let us feed you. You have so much to live for. Don't leave me. Don't leave us. How will I go on without you?” Sebastian sobbed.

“Sebastian, my loyal brother and fledgling. You have done so much for me and we have been through much together. But it is time for you to move on without me. I...*cough* I join our Lord on the day of his death. It's a good day to die.” I smiled weakly.

“Listen to reason Nicholas, there is so much to do yet. So much to see. New loves to be had.” Kryimsson begged as the tears flowed from his eyes.

“I'm sorry my old friend, but I am weary *cough* of this world. I have fought well and you are all safe from Bishop and his Order of the Old Blood. *cough* They have all been destroyed. Live in peace. Do not mourn me. I die a warrior's death. My sword in hand. Valhalla awaits. I love you dearly, but I have to go now. Maeve I love you. *cough* Be happy with Demitri. He may be *cough* misguided at times *cough* but he loves you dearly and would move mountains for you. More than I could ever do my beloved. Sebastian my faithful fledgling, go live. *cough* Live your life on your *cough* terms. I love you my friend. Let *cough* dearest Pierre know I will *cough* I will forever love him. I am *cough* sorry I won't be coming home to him. Katie is waiting for me. I can see her. I forgive you Kryimsson, I forgive you.” Tears streamed down my eyes as I saw the white silhouette of my love with our children in her arms. Sebastian took my hand in his and began to recite last rites. I heard Maeve sobbing beside me as Kryimsson begged me to fight to stay alive. I closed my eyes and felt the sign of the cross placed on my forehead. I squeezed his hand and off into the nothingness I drifted.

Within a matter of hours the flames had consumed almost the entire city as it was fed by a strong wind from the southeast. It destroyed the church, the municipal building, the jail, all of the army barracks, armory, shops, and most houses. Because we made sure the citizens knew the fire was coming there was only one corpse that was found that evening, that being the charred remains of Bishop. Brother Leo had taken the body from the church for it was hallowed ground. He did not deserve to be buried there.

Kryimsson, convinced I was only in hibernation, forbade anyone near me. He refused to let them bury me. He kept vigil by my coffin for months on end, but I never woke up. Finally in June of 1788 Brother Leo was able to convince his nephew I was not going to awaken. It was decided I would be secretly buried in an unmarked grave on the property of a good friend of the coven's, Ignace Martin de Lino de Chalmette, who owned the Chalmette Plantation. My resting place was next to a huge weeping willow tree about an acre from the House. A small stone was placed in the back garden of the brothel next to Katie's inscribed”

“Nicholas Taylor b. Sept 1670 – d. March 21, 1788

Good Friday.

He has joined with his beloved wife and children.”

They felt it best I was not buried next to Katie because they did not want curiosity seekers roaming around the property. The legend of the prophesied “Child of Lilith” had succeeded in ending the wars between the vampire covens and the faithful and loyal all mourned the loss greatly.

A Pirates Last Hurrah

I slept until January of 1815 when the Battle of New Orleans came to its climax on the land of the Chalmette plantation. The blood of fallen soldiers drenched the ground and seeped through the slats of my pine coffin. The smell of iron caused me to begin to stir. I had been reborn. I knew I had become a vampire completely. I’m not sure how I knew, but I knew. When Bishop died, his blood poured into the wounds in my heart combining with the ancient blood I already carried, giving me fully the dark gift. I had slept all those years in the ground, healing. Who knows how long I would have stayed there had there not been a battle above my grave. I weakly dragged my fingers along the top of the coffin and let the blood drip down my fingers. I licked it greedily craving more. I broke through the pine easily and dug my way to the surface. There I crept among the dead and dying searching for those breathing their last breaths. I was a predator, an angel of death and was enjoying the darkness that enveloped me. Their blood fed my hunger. That salty savory liquid sated me. I even went as far as taking in a little bit of their deaths inside me as I drained their last heartbeats from them. I knew taking in someone's death was extremely dangerous but I fed on it. The strength I felt as a result was unreal. As I held the poor soldier I had just drained it suddenly hit me, I no longer became ill from drinking human blood. I also discovered I had somehow found the balance to handle the power while in my long slumber. I no longer felt anger or resent towards the thought of becoming a vampire. I had embraced it. I would use all my powers and prowess to live a life I never thought I'd ever have. I was no longer someone's slave, or property, or pawn. I was my own man.

When I finally had my fill I walked into the plantation house looking to see if my old friend was alive. Sadly not a soul was to be found. The home has been ransacked. I washed and changed my clothes into something more matching to the current fashion. Before I dressed I wondered if I could still fly. Concentrating, the wings sprung from my back. There was no pain this time and there was something different about them now. They were gray in color. And I was able to do it without the use of my incubus powers. Wishing them away, I dressed and wondered what other gifts I possessed. Staring at a candle on a nearby table, it lit! Waving my hand slightly the flame went out. Stomping my foot on the floor it cracked the wall in front of me. Looking at my hands I knew I now contained a tremendous amount of power and I could finally control it. I also knew I could not show it, ever in my new life. I was going to blend in, never stand out again. I wanted to be a nobody.

Rummaging through the many rooms I found a nice amount of money and took all I could carry. This would help me leave New Orleans. I had no plans of staying. I knew it was best to let all keep on believing I was dead. I was tired of the wars, politics, and betrayal. I was going to go have my own life. Suddenly I noticed I was wearing Kryimsson's ring. I guess he placed it on me when they buried me. I knew if I continued to wear it or carry it with me he would detect and come looking for me. There was a chance he already may have. I found a small box and placed the ring inside. I hoped that the small amount of time I spent handling it didn't send off any energy. I went back out to my grave, placed the box inside and covered the spot making it look undisturbed.

Once I got back into the French Quarter I quickly learned I had been correct. The war between the vampires had ended. Now the streets ran red with human blood. The city was consumed in chaos due to the war. As I worked my way through the shadowed streets I could pick up the energies and scents of other vampires. But none seemed to detect me. I walked through the rebuilt French Quarter feeling no familiar presence. Through listening to their thoughts secretly I was able to learn that after my death, Maeve and Demitri were still leading the Coven of Lilith and Cain but now running things from London England. Kryimsson unsurprisingly drowned his sorrows in liquor until it didn't work anymore and took off for lands unknown, not to be heard from since. Sebastian had taken to traveling the world. I was happy to know that I didn't have to leave the city right away as I had originally planned. I had come to love the city of New Orleans. It was the one place I had spent the most time of my life. It had become my home. Wandering the streets for the rest of the night I found myself in front of the brothel. It was still up and running with guests laughing and consorting. I was happy to see it was still there. Looking across the street at the house I had been held in the attic by Bishop and Lieutenant had been rebuilt and looked nothing like I remember. I was thankful for that. I was coming to terms with all that went down before I died in 1788. All of the buildings had been rebuilt as well after the fire, all but the monastery. I flew to where the Abbey of St. Francis once stood, now nothing more than an abandoned crumbling church in the swamp. The tombs below were all empty now. I perched myself on top of a tombstone thinking of all of what once was. I wondered if there were still confessionals? What had happened to Pierre? Lady Char, Mother Superior and Brother Leo, how were they? My heart felt heavy thinking about Pierre. Then Katie and my beautiful twins flashed in my mind. Up I flew back to the brothel to the back garden. I cloaked myself in shadow and was able to find the tombstone buried under a bunch of overgrowth. The little garden had not been kept. I pulled all the weeds away clearing the stone. While doing so I found the one Sebastian placed for me next to it. Tears swelled in my eyes as I thought of him. I missed him. I missed them all. But I knew I did not want to reach out to any of them as well. I needed this time for me. I needed to know my full worth. Could I truly survive on my own? Touching the stone, I promised my beloved wife and children I would live a full life for all of us. I would think and pray to them every day until we held each other again in the Kingdom of Heaven.

Taking money I had from fencing the items I took from the Chalmette manor plus the cash I already had, I bought a small sloop and created a new life for myself under the name of Peter Rideau. I went back to doing what I did best and began sailing enslaved folks to freedom. I was also helping the small pockets of rebels ship cargo such as weapons and supplies back and forth along the Mississippi. I used my vampiric and incubus gifts to block detection. The only remaining identifiers I possessed on my body were the Confessional Tattoos, the mark of Lilith and the scar from Rhavan. My ears still carried their scars as well. No one around me was the wiser. I had died twenty-seven years prior. Most of these humans around me weren't even born yet. I myself only looked about eighteen.

The underground network I dealt with when fencing goods began to call me the 'Dondoysa' “The Ghost” in Creole. I was able to get cargo through tightly guarded areas without detection. I could take supplies with my small crew and then burn the ship to cinders without anyone even knowing we were there. My exploits caught the attention of pirate Jean Lafitte. He convinced me to help him ferry supplies up and down the Mississippi for the troops.

Once the war had ended, Captain Lafitte yearned to return back to a life of piracy He offered me a pretty sweet deal and I joined him and his crew. I had no desire to go back to the life I had before everyone thought I was dead. I was enjoying living my life by my rules for the first time. I worked as a spy for the Spanish for a little while. Along with Captain Lafitte and his brother Pierre, we were known as "Number Thirteen". Our little spy ring was quite successful. By 1817 we had taken over Galveston Island and renamed it Campeche Island basically turning it into a smugglers paradise. We tore down the existing buildings and rebuilt homes, shops, taverns and even a small shipyard. All ships who were part of the fleet flew the flag of Mexico, although we did not participate in their war, it helped us move more freely in the surrounding waters. Our little operation made us rich. Due to this I lived a pretty lavish lifestyle complete with servants and the finest furniture and clothes money could buy. I was living the life of a gentleman pirate. No one around me knew the wiser about me being a vampire. I was blending in just fine.

By 1818, our little colony had grown to about one hundred-eighty men and several women. Captain Lafitte interviewed all prospective crew, servants, and shopkeepers himself. All were required to take his oath of loyalty. He conducted most business on his ship, ‘The Pride’, which is where he also lived most of the time. He felt safer there.

Being the master of deception and lies Captain Lafitte was able to forge Letters of Marque from an imaginary nation to allow all the ships sailing from Galveston be known as privateers, giving our ships permission to attack ships from any country. Being that most pirates and crew were illiterate he was able to easily get away with this ruse for quite some time. Even I believed his letter was legit.

In April 1818, the United States passed a law prohibiting the import of slaves into any port in the United States. This law had several loopholes though. It gave any ship permission to capture a slave ship, regardless of the country it came from. Then, the slaves captured were turned over to a customs office who would then resell them in the United States. Half the money would be kept by the customs office and those who captured the ship received the other half. Privateers, pirates and several smugglers, made tons of money from very poorly written law. Captain Lafitte, also being a man driven by greed, came up with the perfect grift. He would take a slave ship and sell the “cargo” for a discounted price to smugglers. Then one of the smugglers “representatives” would in turn purchase the slaves at auction, then the smuggler would be given half of the purchase price. This then gave them ownership of the slaves and could resell them in New Orleans, or in other parts of the Deep South.

I could not fault them for how brilliant the scam was but I also would not stand by and watch innocent men, woman and children be sold off into slavery or used for food for the large vampire community still in New Orleans. Without Captain Lafitte knowledge, I went back to my old line of work helping slaves escape to freedom. I gathered a small crew together of former slaves to help me. I paid them very well and they were very loyal. With the constant stream of slave ships coming into port, we were not hurting for work. Unbeknownst to me, our little enterprise was cutting into the profits of Campeche Island. Some of Lafitte's men, needing money, thought it a great idea to kidnap a Karankawa native woman for profit. The warriors of her tribe in turn attacked and killed five of the crew. Angered by this, Captain Lafitte ordered and aimed the artillery at the Karankawa, killing most of the men in the tribe. This began the downfall of our little paradise. Then a hurricane in September flooded most of the island causing a couple more deaths. It destroyed four ships and almost all buildings left on the island. We did our best to rebuild the tiny community and continued on with our piracy, but now somewhere along the line we had angered the American government.

Early in 1821 one of the fleets Captains attacked an American merchant ship bringing wrath of the U.S. to our front door. The government sent the USS Enterprise to remove Captain Lafitte and the rest of us from Galveston Island. We agreed to go without a fight. On May, 7 1821 we departed from our dear paradise never to step foot on the island again. It was shortly after that we found out that Captain Lafitte had never had a Letter of Marque and that indeed we were sailing as pirates. Once this truth came out most of the crew refused to sail. I myself, being a pirate back in the Golden age of piracy, wasn't angry. I actually admired him for his cunning. But I was not happy about being deceived. That night, the remaining crew and myself boarded one of his Brigs, 'General Victoria' and destroyed its mast and spars. Crippling the ship we took off with all we could carry. Pirate!

Over the next few months, Captain Lafitte established a base along the coast of Cuba, where he bribed local officials handsomely to look the other way. When he and other pirates operating in the area began attacking merchant ships carrying goods to Cuba, this angered Cuban officials greatly. By the end of 1822, Cuba had banned piracy from their waters.

June 1822, officials in the Great Colombia had begun commissioning former privateers as officers in their new navy. Lafitte was granted a commission and given a new ship, a 43-ton schooner he named “General Santander". Not one to pass up a good profitable opportunity, I also joined their navy and given a schooner which I named the “ Dondoysa II.” To say Captain Lafitte was less than pleased to see me was an understatement. We did our best to keep out of each other's ways and our crews were as civil as pirates could be to one another. Over the following months all was as well as it could be. We were making a good commission with the Navy and things along the coast were predominantly quiet aside from the occasional skirmish with a rogue pirate ship here and there.

February 1823 I was ordered to help Captain Lafitte patrol the coast of the town Omoa, Honduras. The town had the largest Spanish fort in all of Central America and it held Spanish silver shipments from the mines of Tegucigalpa until it was sent out to its final destinations. An easy assignment but with Captain Lafitte at the lead it made me nervous. It was a very cloudy night with low visibility on February 4th. Everything was fine until one of my crew noticed Captain Lafitte going rogue. Without our knowledge, he was attempting to take two Spanish merchant vessels. What the fuck was he thinking! We watched as he opened fire on the small ships and went after them hard. Stunned all we could do was watch the insanity of it unfold. After sometime it seemed the two Spanish ships were fleeing into the dense fog. Ordering our ship to align with his, I swung over on a rope over to Captain Lafitte schooner. Once I stepped on deck I went right after him as he drew his pistol.

“What were you thinking? You have written all our death sentences you fool!” I drew my sword as the clicking of pistols surrounded me. I fought hard to keep my rage from triggering my gifts.

“Ha! You call me foolish boy! And here you are looking down the barrel of my pistol. Why do you care if we sack a few ships here and there. It's a Spanish one at that. Free for the taking.” He laughed at me.

Before any of us knew what was happening, a cannonball whizzed past our heads slamming into the deck behind us. We scrambled to take positions, to try and defend our schooners the best we could. I was able to get back over to my ship long enough to bark out some orders before our masts were taken out by chain shot. Looking up and through the smoke, I saw the ships coming at us were heavily armed privateers, returning heavy fire. We could not survive this fight. I grabbed my first mate and told him to get the men off the ship. There was no way I was going to allow them to get captured or hung as pirates. I did my best to turn and sail our ship far enough for my men to make a clean getaway and get to land unharmed. My poor little schooner was taking on heavy damage and there was no saving her. As I was gathering my ledger from my cabin, the ceiling above came crashing down in flames, burying me. The inferno licked at my face and my hair and clothes caught fire. It was a pain beyond my knowledge. Soon white light enveloped me and I was in pain no more.

Later, I would discover my crew came back and took my measly charred remains and brought me back to New Orleans. Burying me in one of their family tombs at the St. Louis Cemetery number one. An inscription read “Peter Rideau b.unknown d.Feb. 4th 1823 at sea” on the front plaque.

Part Four

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